The Benevolent Troll
'The Benevolent Troll' Being a Troll is hard work; everyone always thinks I am going to eat them or their family, so they never stick around to chat. I am sure that when they know the real me they will cease fleeing in terror when I simply ask them how their day is going. I must admit, that does aggravate me a little, so when they look back over their shoulders as they stumble away in haste I am not always all smiles. What hurts is that when I do smile they start to scream, I cannot help it if I have big teeth that make smiling appear to them as sneering. A little while back I grow just to irritated of them and decided to leave the area and let them mature a little before I try to make their acquaintance. My leaving had nothing to do with the fact that they were chasing me with torches and pitchforks. After wandering I found a wonderful valley in the mountains and decided to make it my home. Since I did not wish to mar the beauty of this land by placing a thing as ugly as a hut on it, I decided to make my home under a bridge that was already carelessly built overtop a little stream. I enjoy being alone, it allows me to think in relative peace, and enjoy the beauty of nature. It also gives me ample time to sleep, Trolls love to sleep. This is how things were before those dreadful billy goats came along. One day I was out smelling the wild flowers that grow here, when I overheard something coming. Trolls have very good hearing, so I was able to get back to my bridge before they saw me. Why did I go back to my bridge? Because I did not wish to scare away any who wished to enjoy the beauty of this land. Imagine my horror when I overheard those goats talking about how they were going to come into my beloved valley and eat until they become fat! I simply could not allow it, so I figured to teach them a lesson. I decided to simply scare them away, since I am not particularly fond of violence. �Trip, trap!� went the bridge. When I heard the first of them crossing my bridge I used my meanest sounding voice, hoping that if I scared away the first of them, they would all just turn back and find another valley. 2 �Who is that crossing my bridge!� I roared. �Oh, it is only I, the tiniest Billy Goat Gruff, and I am going up to the valley to make myself fat,� was the reply. After hearing this, I was a little ashamed of myself for yelling at such a little guy, but my love for the valley was greater, so I continued the horrible charade. �I am coming to gobble you up!� I said disgusted at what was just said "Oh, no! Do not take me,� the little Goat squeaked. �Wait a little till the Second Billy Goat Gruff comes. He is much bigger than I.� Hearing that I was filled with loathing towards the Goat for so selfishly offering his comrade life in order to save his own. I let the Goat pass for I could stand his presence no longer Before the Second Billy Goat came, I quickly drank from the stream to quench my soar throat. I never used that awful voice and it hurt my throat. �Trip, trap, trip, trap!� went the bridge. When I heard the second of them crossing my bridge I pushed on the bridges supports causing it to sway to and fro, in hopes it would have some added effect to my voice �Who is that crossing my bridge!� I roared. �Oh, it is the Second Billy Goat Gruff, I am going up to the valley to make myself fat,� said the Billy goat. It was infuriating for me to listen to them say that. How selfish could they be to think that this valley was for their use only? �I am coming to gobble you up!� I said, hoping to scare him away. �Oh, no! Do not take me!� the second Billy goat pleaded. �Wait for the Third Billy Goat Gruff, he is much larger than I.� A now familiar loathing arose inside me but determined to stop the source of the matter, I let the Second Billy Goat Gruff cross and prepared to have a talk with the leader of this selfish endeavor. Surely he will listen to reason if he is not scared away, I thought. 3 �Trip, trap, trip, trap, trip, trap.� Groaned the bridge. So heavy was the Third Billy Goat Gruff, that the bridge nearly buckled under his weight. �Who is that crossing my bridge!� I roared as loud as I could. �It is I! The Third Billy Goat Gruff," said the Billy Goat, who had an ugly hoarse voice of his own. That beast is a monster, I thought to myself. One bent to destroy a place of such tranquility, and devour all of its inhabitants, out of petty spite. I could not let that happen, so even though it pained me to do so I had to fend off this fiend. �I am coming to gobble you up!� I screamed and climbed atop the bridge, determined to protect the valley from harm. The beast began to chant, in a voice so horrifying it hurts just thinking of it. �Well, come along! I have got two spears, � he lowered his head to show a pair of wicked horns. �And I will poke your eyeballs out at your ears; I have got besides two curling-stones,� he stamped his horrible hooves on the bridge, causing it to shudder violently. �I will crush you to bits, body and bones.� And at that he charged at me, a wicked gleam in his eyes! I honestly did not know what to do, nothing like this had ever happened to me before. I just stood there hoping things would work out well, they did not. That monster poked my eyeballs out, so very painfully with those sharp horns, and with his hooves, crushed me to bits, body, and boned, then tossed me of the bridge. As if that was not enough, the Goats stripped the valley eating everything with such gluttony they grow so fat they could barely waddle home. In their wake they left a valley in total ruin, and one Troll very unhappy indeed.