���� Celano *to room...*
I know Waspinator's a dork, but I LIKE Thrust. He's sexxxy! Right down to his name. *she poofs Thrust (in vehicle mode) into the room and Celano becomes�*
MechaCel:
���� *purrs...* Hey there short, metallic and handsome! Know what? I love cute guys. I love big, powerful motorcycles. I love cute guys who own big, powerful motorcycles. But I you know what I could really go for? A cute guy who is a big, poweful motorcycle! Especially if he's purple. *sits down on his seat* Ooo yeah, I sure could go for a bad boy like you! *...grasps his "handle bars" and giggles suggestively, massaging his kickstand with her feet, and obviously enjoying the feel of all that Vehicon horsepower beneath her.*
���� *Thrust doesn't react. Cel looks surprised, whispering* This is the part where you run away screaming and leap out the window.
Thrust:
���� Are you kidding? I'd love some one on one attention from you, little harpy. It's lonely being a Vehicon.
MechaCel:
���� Oh�really�there's an unexpected wrinkle. Um, have you seen this bit before?
Thrust:
���� Yes. You poof some guy you think is hunky into the chat and pounce on him. He freaks out and takes off out of here like a bat out of Hell. Personally, I think they're out of their minds! Now, what exactly is it you want to do with me, you crazysexycool Harpy-bot? *chuckles menacingly and transforms, scooping the her into his arms.*
MechaCel:
���� *grins nervously* Go for ice cream?
Thrust:
���� I hardly think that's what all those other guys have been running away from all these mega-cycles� I know what you really want, heh, heh. So, do you want to go somewhere more private or are you the exhibitionist type?
MechaCel:
���� Oh�that�*laughs nervously* tee�hee�hee�Oh my�um�aren't we the impetuous one? �Say, wouldn't you like to go out first, maybe eat dinner and see a movie; meet my family�or my dog?
Thrust:
���� My, my, that hardly sounds like the lusty Harpy you're always claiming yourself to be.
MechaCel:
���� My reputation precedes me, I see. *getting desperate, looking for a way out* You know I'm not really a robot. This is just like a really good Halloween costume--
Thrust:
���� *interrupts* --I know that. However, when you've been waiting to get some as long I have, you stop being picky. Especially since even though I have become manly Thrust, the sexiest thing on Cybertron, grrlz still won't go out with me because they know I used to be Waspinator.
���� So take me. I'm yours.
MechaCel:
���� *tries playing dumb* Take you where?
Thrust:
���� *dead pan* Ha. *sarcastic pause* Ha.
MechaCel:
���� *whimpers, squirms, fear-filled, looks at everyone in the chat. Anime sweat drops big and little appear around her head* Um, guys...HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!
Thrust:
����Help? Help! What the fuck is up with THAT? I thought you wanted to find out why they call me Thrust? *sounds almost hurt* You do, don't you?
MechaCel:
����*sniffles* Well, I wasn't expecting you to want me to� *blows her 'nose' in a convenient hanky (MechaCel has no beak. Unlike her half-and-half Celano-self, as a Transformer she's an all-girl robot with all-bird beast mode.)*
Thrust:
����Wait�wait�*rubs his 'temple' with his free hand as if he's developed a major migraine* You lured me in here with the tantalizing proposition of interfacing and expected me to run away like some scared kid-bot with sexual hang-ups and over-bearing, puritanical progenitors?
MechaCel:
����Sure. All the others do�*doesn't sound like she's entirely happy about that*
Thrust:
����And it never occurred to you I might say yes?
MechaCel:
����*shakes her head emphatically no. gives him the big sad puppy-eyes*
Thrust:
����They always say no? *bewildered* Who are these guys? Eunuchs?
MechaCel:
����*sounds upset* No! *starts naming names on her fingers* There's Goliath, and David Qin, and Silver Bolt�and�
Thrust:
����*sighs* I get it now! Cel, all those guys have girlfriends! Heavily armed girlfriends who would render them gender-less for so much as looking at another female! I'm single! And desperate! And lonesome� *now Thrust is getting all mopey* I though the spider-bot liked me, but only 'cause she thought I was that drooling dog-faced dork she's always been so smitten with in disguise. Then she found out he currently resides in Jetstorm and I'm back to being the invisible stealth male-bot. *grimaces bitterly* I suppose you like Jetstorm too?
MechaCel:
Jetstorm? Ick�hell no! *pauses* Well, in the sense that he's the once and future Silver Bolt, I guess, but as himself? No way! He's mean! And he comes off queer�
Thrust:
*interjects darkly* More that you know�
MechaCel:
*jabbers on*�not that there's anything wrong with that really, I just find it sort of a turn off and�WHAT?
Thrust:
����Let's just say him and Megs spend a lot of quality time together.
MechaCel:
����You're saying--?? *snickers* Ew! Black Arachnia told me about Megatron's private wardrobe�I'll bet you sleep with one eye open, don't you?
Thrust:
����*snorts* When I sleep at all. But getting back to the two of us getting together�*gives his best attempt at a conspiratory grin--which is damn near impossible for a guy with no mouth*
MechaCel:
����Must you always have a one-track mind?
Thrust:
����Well, actually, my CPU has over 1000 different drives and�*catches himself* Will you stop trying to change the subject! I'm horny, dammit!
MechaCel:
����Gee, you need to relax! I'll go get you an herbal tea� *tries to squirm out of his arms*
Thrust:
����*holds her tighter* There you go again! Look, I don't want an herbal tea. I want sex. The sooner, the better.
MechaCel:
����*her optics narrow, sarcastically* You really know what to say to put a girl in the mood.
Thrust:
����Are you forgetting it was YOU who asked me here? *sighs, disgusted* Just tell me one thing: Am I ever going to get laid out of this?
MechaCel:
����Um�
Thrust:
����I knew it! *groans and drops her*
MechaCel:
����Ooof!
Thrust:
����*glares at the Harpy* You, lady, are nothing but a no-good tease! *yells at the world* This is so unfair! I'm never going to get any! I might as well throw this away! *yanks his robo-protection from his hip and tosses it* I am going to go offline a virgin! WAAAAH! It doesn't matter if I'm Waspinator or Thrust, I'm still the universe's answer to comic relief. *sobs*
����*continues* I don't understand it. I know I was a major poindexter when I was Waspinator, but I thought with the new body and personality it would be different. I try to be chivalrous; I try to be a gentleman. I always open doors, pull out chairs, appologize before I punch an enemy femme's lights out, but the girls still won't give me the time of day. *Thrust flops down on his backside, slumps over and stares at the little wheel he has instead of feet*
����No one will ever love me. I'm gonna die alone. *sighs*
MechaCel:
����*Cel feels guilty. She sits beside Thrust and puts her arm around his shoulders.* Now, surely it isn't as bad as all that. I think you're pretty cool.
Thrust:
����Then why do you treat me like I'm untouchable?
MechaCel:
����It isn't that. I just never expected you to take me serious. No one else ever does. *L* I guess what I did was unkind. Arno's always telling me so.
Thrust:
����Arno? Is he your boyfriend?
MechaCel:
����*L* No, Arno's just "mere mortal" with way better sense than this ol' Harpy's ever had. Well, I suppose I do owe you something. *Thrust looks hopeful* But not THAT. *Thrust looks crestfallen* How 'bout that date I offered you?
Thrust:
����I'm really not the 'dinner and a movie' type
MechaCel:
����Well, how do you feel about a little target practice followed by racing top speed down a smooth strip of hot tarmac with me in the saddle?
Thrust:
����Well, yeah...I guess that could be fun. Can we cuddle afterwards? I like to cuddle.
MechaCel:
����*L* Sure why not? Damn, with an attitude like that, I don't know why you aren't having to beat the femmes off with a stick! And not just the ones who are trying to kill you. *winks*
Thrust:
����*shrugs* And when I take you home, will you kiss me good night�?
MechaCel:
����Of course I will. You're cute!
Thrust:
����One more thing�*does the equivalent of wringing his hands* If Jetstorm or Tankorr asks me about our date, can I lie and say we interfaced?
MechaCel:
����You're actually asking my permission? *pauses, thinks, and chuckles* Yeah, go ahead. But if anyone asks me, I'll deny it.
Thrust:
����I can live with that. *is happy*
MechaCel:
����Well, damn, what're we still doing here? Let's go! *Thrust transforms back to bike mode. Cel hops on and they ride off into the sunset, to the always cool rocking sound of Meat Loaf's "Bat Out of Hell".*
~fini~
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