| Friday June 14th 2002 The writing critique class wrapped up rather well on Wednesday night and I was sorry to see it end. If I don't get something informal arranged (or maybe even if I do), I'll probably sign up for a similar class in the autumn, time permitting. I went on course this week wiith a pseudo-coworker, and we went out for lunch together. Right out of the blue she asked 'so, how's married life?'. Obviously our grapevine / rumour mill here at work hasn't flourished to nearly the extent I'd assumed. I had to revisit and explain my several months old news, but it led to interesting conversation. She's on her second marriage now, and she described the contrast between the two quite vividly; time dragged by in her first, but it's flown past in the second. The way it should, I guess. Time didn't crawl by in my marriage, and I even noticed it at the time. I can't give married bliss all (probably not even most of) the credit. There was the fact I was out of school for the first time and the year was no longer marked by semesters and exams; and the fact that I involved myself in few activities (much improved since my separation) to otherwise judge the passage of time with, either. I feel like I've done more with my life in the past three or four months than I did in the year and half prior. I don't need Martha to tell me that's a good thing. It doesn't take much. All you do is try a few things you haven't before, get to know people better who were only loose acquaintances, and don't worry too much about planning things ahead of time - just 'go with the flow'. I think I'm improving quite a bit in those respects. I wasn't as open to new things before, wasn't as sociable, and always wanted things worked out ahead of time in detail. Was it the 'responsible married man' in me, holding me back? Would that persona steal over me again if I married a second time? I hope not. Or is it this separation that's remade me? Or living on my own, for the first time? There's still things about myself I want to work on. I want to be faster on my feet when a stranger speaks to me, catching me off guard, or when I'm introduced to someone. If you were riding on my shoulder yesterday, you'd know exactly what I'm talking about. And I'd rather be less forgetful, so I don't forget my apartment keys at the dealers and have to drive back for them like I did last week. Now that was annoying. |