A poem by Cindy Dives
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First, the swim suit, and all is fine. The evening sun shines down, about to set on the horizon. The boat sways gently on the waves laughter… a feeling of togetherness we are one, heading on an adventure. Then, the wetsuit, so tight, but cut perfectly for one. movement restricted, yet fluid. check tank. sssssst. air ok. tank on bc, regs on tank, air on, weight belt and bc on self movement hard. mask, snorkel fins, buddy check, o-k signal, we are quiet now, a work here and there. Reg in mouth. hand over reg, holding it in place. Captain gives ok. One large step. Floating. splash. disorientation. heart beats faster. where am I? panic. Rise to the surface. Look around. give ok signal to boat. take reg out, put snorkel in. swim to buddy. time to go. we say our last words. one final check of equipment. let air out of bc slowly we begin to go down. silence. ears feel pressure. cold water on face. some water in mask, clear mask. slowly down. slowly down. 10 feet 20 feet 30, 40, 50, 60, 70, 80 feet the silence is deadly. the darkness complete. flashlight on. look around. where is buddy there, a flash of light. silence. swim to buddy. we suit, now like an invisible layer of skin check – are you ok? hand signals back ok! lights flash on rocks around us. the lights are ours. together, we look. yet alone we discover. a fish swims by, silver glowing through the beam of light. then gone. look up, or is it down darkness complete. silence deadly. then the sound. quiet and steady. the sound of breathing. the sound of my breathing. then I notice other sounds. what could they be. where is this foreign land I am? and I see the beam from my flashlight. and I don’t know what way is up or down. panic begins to set in though I’ve done this a hundred times before… then I see bubble, floating, and I know which way is up. Relax, become one with the water. the current begins to take me away. I do not resist. I welcome the motion. I embrace the movement. darkness ahead. darkness behind. I check for buddy. he is there, beside me in his own little world. what he sees I do not know. is it the same for both? does it matter. I adjust my bc and reach a level of weighlesness check gages. all is well. |
the silence is no longer, I’ve come accustomed to this world, the peace it holds is great, It is unfortunate I can only visit… a strange muffled sound, somehow recognized as buddy’s voice. I swim over to see what it is he has to show me, and notice the look on his face, awe, wonder, amazement, calm, serenity, what is this look, why can I only see it here, down below in the darkness… A feeling comes over me, It is hard to explain, I am calm, my heart has slowed down, my breathing steady, I am in an alien world, I am a visitor, and I can’t help but wonder, Has the end come? Is this Heaven. Calm. Peaceful. Beautiful. Se very out of the ordinary. I look at the fish buddy points out. And smile. China Rock Fish. Black with yellow stripe. Looks curiously at us. The visitors in his world. I wonder, what would he think of ours, although I know he feels the effects of it. And I am so very calm. My body, fluid like the ocean, my body is the ocean. I weigh nothing, I move nothing, I am water. I am life, I am amazed. A feeling so strong comes upon me. words cannot explain, I want to never leave this place, Nirvana Achieved. But I am a visitor, and long I cannot stay, I look at my gages, time has passed, we’ve traveled a ways, but most importantly, air, is used 1200 psi 1200 psi cold I really be down to only 1200psi. I wave at buddy, he checks his gages his thumb points upwards, time to go he is saying. Sadly I nod my head. For I know what he says is true. And slowly we swim up… 70 feet… 60 feet… 50 feet… 40 feet… 30 feet… 20 feet… 15 feet. and there we wait. patiently. holding on to a piece of kelp blowing in the current. It is like sitting atop a very tall tree, and letting a cool breeze blow slowly past. The moment is here the moment is now. Soon enough we reach the top, and our heads burst through the water breaking the seam between one world and another. and the noises are loud. deafeningly so. and we look at each other. and we are laughing. “Great Dive” he yells at me. “Great Dive” I yell back. and then silence because only silence can describe how we feel. Soon the boat comes and picks us up, and the others are there. and the silence is broken. and the excitement comes through. and we tell of our adventures. and we tell what we saw. and we look at each other, loudly, laughing, shouting, telling our stories, and silently wishing, silently wishing, silently wishing we were below. |