MAKING HOUSE CALLS ON A BICYCLE

 

By Clayton Davis

 

         Dr. Alex Hertzman is six feet tall with an athlete's frame and body.  His dark hair is always combed tastefully.  His dark brown eyes steadily twinkle.

         Dr. Hertzman's physique is kept constantly in tune by riding his ten-speed bicycle.  His good humor comes from his picking a blues guitar.

         There is a patient seventy years old with arthritis.  The doctor asked how the patient was doing.  The patient said he could no longer play his guitar because of stiff fingers.

         One thing led to another with the doctor asking what kind of guitar.

         A Gibson ES-350.  It is a classic from the 1950s, valued at $5000.

         The doctor asserted he would scream with delight at the sight of one and yodel out loud at the prospect of playing a Gibson

ES-350.

         That could be arranged.

         The patient brought his Gibson to the office and learned it is one model earlier than the guitar played by B.B. King, a Gibson ES-355.

         Dr. Hertzman can tell you the difference between the sound of New Orleans blues and Saint Louis music.

         The doctor did his internship at Richmond and Tucson where he picked up the soft southern way of saying phrases.  His speech pattern sometimes rings with those southern musical tones that evoke memories of honeysuckle blossoms and pleasant breezes through tall pines.

         Asked what his greatest surprise was during the years of internship, he reports that some patients are dumb as stumps.

         On the days when the doctor's smile is not as bright as it usually is the reason can be dug out of him.  Some patient has recently failed to understand the importance of the doctor's prescriptions.

         Dr. Hertzman's steady, empathetic gaze goes deep into the patient's soul.  His manner of interview will get the patient to report symptoms that family members never suspected.

         He achieves total rapport and trust among his patients.

         The guitar owning arthritis patient had some swelling in the ankles, probably from too much salt intake.  Dr. Hertzman is an educator and carefully explained to the patient that salt is addictive.  All foods contain salt naturally.  Just stop sprinkling and you'll soon begin to taste the natural salt in food.

         Dr. Hertzman says balsamic vinegar and lemon juice are delightful substitutes for sprinkling salt on your food.

         After the patient began to lose weight and the swelling receded, Dr. Hertzman asked what he had said to the patient that caught his attention.

         The doctor's question to the patient had been along the lines whether the patient was serious about getting better.

         That did it.  Something that simple caught the patient's attention.

         Dr. Hertzman is that way.  Just the right word or suggestion works wonders.

         The Gibson ES-350 was loaned to Dr. Hertzman to keep and play awhile, since the arthritis patient couldn't grasp the strings the way he used to do.  On some visits the Gibson is sitting in the office and the doctor asks the patient to strum a little, probably to assess the degree of recovery in the fingers.

         After a long period of aching from arthritis pain, some patients will suffer mild depression. 

         Telling the patient he sounded depressed and might need professional counseling brought the suggestion from the patient that he would turn the session into a prayer meeting in that case.

         The doctor suggested the patient might want to try Prozac.  That brought an adamant refusal from the patient.

         The doctor asked the patient what was the source of that hostility.

         The patient said he always thought only crazy people take Prozac, probably a common misunderstanding.

         The offer was made to the patient to explain chemically how Prozac works.  Okay.  The patient agreed to consider it.

         Prozac inhibits the uptake of Serotonin and elevates the pain threshold.  Okay.  Let's try it.

         On the next visit the patient was considerably improved in his demeanor and visited happily.

         That's Dr. Hertzman's manner.  He is an educator.

         Demonstrating his serious intent to cut down on the patient's salt usage, the doctor threatened to drop in someday while riding his ten-speed bicycle in the neighborhood.

         That would be just fine.  The patient would be honored.

         What the doctor promised to do was come in the house and throw away all salt shakers, all peanut butter and Ritz crackers.  Bad for you.  And the doctor wanted to see the patient sitting with his feet and legs elevated.

         One day it happened.  Up the driveway came a tall, good-looking bicycle rider.  After removing the leg clips from his trousers and setting up the kick stand, the doctor knocked on the patient's front door.

         Quickly the patient grabbed the lever on the Lazy-Boy chair and elevated his feet and legs.  Welcoming the doctor into the house, the patient lied that he had been sitting in that position all morning.

         Not many doctors make house calls on a bicycle.  Not many doctors have the empathy and understanding to tailor a cure for the individual patient. 

         Arthritis affects most human beings on earth above a certain age.

         Perhaps all of them should be so fortunate to have someone like Dr. Alex Hertzman on their case.

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