Meditations

by samuraiheart


Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me and are the property of their respective owners.

Warnings: Kenshin and Sanosuke shounen-ai


“Just try it, Sano. It really helps.” Kenshin smiled up at Sanosuke standing in the doorway.

“I don’t think it will help, Kenshin.” Sanosuke shook his head as he sat down and looked over at the redheaded samurai seated before him.

“Come on now. You said you’ve been distracted lately. Now concentrate.” Kenshin’s eyes sparkled in the dim light of the room.

Sanosuke closed his eyes and took a deep breath, but gave up quickly. “Forget it Kenshin. You don’t understand.” His problems could not be solved this simply. His problems with concentration had nothing to do with breathing or focusing and everything to do with the samurai sitting across from him.

Kenshin leaned closer too him and Sanosuke wondered if he did this on purpose. It was hard enough to keep his feelings for Kenshin hidden. He didn’t need to be tempted.

Sanosuke could feel Kenshin’s breath on his neck as he whispered in his ear. “Relax.”

“Fine. But this is the last time.” Sanosuke frowned and squeezed his eyes shut again.

Several seconds passed as they sat in silence. After a while, Sanosuke couldn’t take it anymore. “What am I supposed to be thinking about?” he asked cautiously.

“Something calming.” Kenshin said quietly. His eyes were closed and his lips curved up in a slight smile. His breathing was even.

“Like what?” Sanosuke asked. This wasn’t making sense to him and it certainly wasn’t helping the situation.

“I don’t know. It’s your decision. Some place that you feel relaxed.” Kenshin answered patiently.

“Well, what do you think about?” Sanosuke was getting bored with this. He knew that no matter what Kenshin said or did it wouldn’t help.

Kenshin blushed. “It doesn’t matter.” He said softly and quickly closed his eyes again.

“Well, how am I supposed to… Wait a minute… you’re blushing!” Sanosuke moved closer to Kenshin and eyed him suspiciously.

“No, I’m not.” Kenshin answered quickly. He knew Sanosuke was still looking at him and he felt his cheeks burning even more.

“Yes, you are. What do you think about?” Sanosuke was staring at Kenshin now and he raised his eyebrows as he saw his friend shift uncomfortably. Now this was getting interesting.

“It’s personal.” Kenshin said matter-of-factly trying to change the subject.

“It’s probably Kaoru naked.” Sanosuke joked and rolled his eyes.

Kenshin’s eyes widened. “Sano!”

“Well, what else am I supposed to think if you won’t tell me?”

“You can think of Kaoru naked if you want to, but I’ve got my own image to focus on.” Kenshin hoped that would be the end of it. He took a deep breath and tried to relax again.

“Who says I want to see her naked?” Sanosuke answered. He could rarely get such a reaction from Kenshin. This was becoming amusing.

“You brought it up.” Kenshin said in defense.

“That doesn’t mean… wait a minute! This is about you! What are you thinking about?” Sanosuke persisted.

Kenshin smirked and closed his eyes. He let his image come to him slowly. Strong arms wrapped around him and he felt Sanosuke holding him close. It almost felt real. He wished it were.

“Come on, Kenshin.” Sanosuke pleaded. He looked over at Kenshin with wide eyes and tried to convince him to tell him.

“Why should I tell you?” Kenshin said with a playful smile. Maybe he could have some fun with this too. If they both played the game, it would end soon.

Sanosuke stood to go. He had had enough of this.

“Sano. You promised.” Kenshin insisted.

Sanosuke sighed. “I promised I would let you show me. I did. It didn’t help.”

“Would it help if I told you what I focused on?” This time a mischievous glint filled Kenshin’s eyes.

Sanosuke raised an eyebrow and shrugged. He guessed he could give it one more try. He sat in front of Kenshin again. “Well… yeah.” He said.

Kenshin laughed. “Nope. You have to find something of your own.” Kenshin couldn’t help but smile again. He loved spending time with Sanosuke. He was so cute when he was irritated. Kenshin knew Sanosuke wasn’t really angry. He bit his lip as Sanosuke took a deep breath and closed his eyes again. He was even better in person. Kenshin smirked again. There was a tinge of bitterness in it this time. He would never know for sure. He closed his eyes too and let all thoughts drift from his mind before he began to focus on his favorite place. He could almost feel the warmth of Sanosuke’s body against his own. He opened his eyes just in time to see Sanosuke leaning towards him. He had time to move away, but he chose to stay and find out what he was up to. He laughed as Sanosuke grabbed both of his wrists and pinned him to the ground. They both knew that Kenshin could get away easily, but he played along. He looked up at Sanosuke questioningly. “Is there a problem, Sano?”

“Not as long as you tell me.” Sanosuke bent over his friend and looked into his eyes. Several strands of his dark black hair fell within a few inches of Kenshin’s face.

“You know I won’t.” Kenshin said wryly.

Sanosuke let go reluctantly, but stayed hovering over Kenshin. He looked into his eyes and thought he saw something there for a moment. He blushed as he realized the position he was in. His face was just a few inches from Kenshin’s. He could kiss him if he leaned a little closer. He knew he should move, but he didn’t want to. He could feel Kenshin’s heart beating fast and he saw a blush creeping up his cheeks. His own heart was beating fast too.

He reached out and brushed a strand of red hair from Kenshin’s eyes and waited for Kenshin to object. His hand shook a little as he did so. He wanted this so much. He looked into Kenshin’s eyes. He saw fear there and a little bit of confusion. He started to think this was a mistake, but he saw something else in Kenshin’s eyes also. Kenshin wanted this to. Sanosuke couldn’t believe it.

He leaned forward and pressed his lips against his friend’s. They yielded to his touch and the kiss became more passionate as each gave in to it. Kenshin brought his hand up to Sanosuke’s shoulder and pulled himself closer to his friend. Sanosuke ran his hands over Kenshin’s shoulders and stroked smooth strands of red hair.

After several moments, he pulled away and sat down beside his friend. Kenshin sat up too and looked over at Sanosuke with wide eyes. For a moment he was afraid that he had done something wrong. He reached out cautiously to clasp Sanosuke’s hand in his own. Sanosuke turned to him and smiled as their fingers intertwined. Kenshin laid his head against Sanosuke’s shoulder and closed his eyes. He sighed softly as Sanosuke brought his arm up to wrap around the samurai.

Kenshin leaned into the embrace and opened his eyes to look up at Sanosuke’s face. “Thank you, Sano.” He said softly.

Sanosuke shook his head. “No. Thank you. I think you solved my concentration problem.” He leaned over and gave Kenshin a kiss on the cheek. He smiled again and winked. “And I never even found out what you were thinking.”

Kenshin smiled. “You could’ve fooled me.” He whispered.

Sanosuke looked at him quizzically for a moment, but decided not to pursue it as Kenshin bent closer for another kiss.

~Owari~


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