It’s been while since I visited my blog but that doesn’t mean I have not been reflecting on my fate and the direction of my life it has taken me thus far. Last night, I called my sister, who was in California, and she was telling me all the exciting things that have been happening during her internship at the stage set of a popular TV series, “Desperate Housewives”. The actor playing Carlos, the Spanish husband of one of the desperate housewives, was standing behind her and listening to his iPod as they filed into the set between filming. Due to proper stage handling etiquette, my sister didn’t speak to the actor, so that he could remain concentrated on his lines. According to her mentor, actors are under a lot of pressure to learn their lines, which changes frequently throughout day. It is not unusual for actors to receive their scripts only that morning and be ready for filming that same evening. At another instance, my sister could hear Terry Hatcher performing a romantic scene on the other side of the wall from where she stood. It was quite exciting to see the magical workings of television through the eyes and perspective of reality.


“How exciting!” I said to my sister.

I told her I was really envious of her and the direction her career has taken over the years. She had gone to the east side, the west side, up north and down south of the country. She had even gone overseas, went all over Europe, and visited the Mona Lisa at the Louvre. One of my personal life goals were to travel and see the world and here is my sister traveling and doing it as part of her career!


“That’s because our goals are not the same” my sister tried to point out the difference between us. “Your priorities were geared towards financial stability while my priorities were not.”


What she didn’t understand was that stability of finances would be key to funding my traveling adventures. When I do have the funds, I don’t have the vacation time to travel. Pretty ironic don’t you think?

Funny how life can throw you curve balls just when you thought the curve-ball days were dying down after all the struggles and hard work invested thus far. To remind you what has happened since I “proclaimed” to take control of my life after my masters, I was given an opportunity to work at my ideal organization and I had felt it was a once-in-a-life time deal. So I decided to give it a chance and put my “freedom lifestyle” plans on hold. I eventually settled down in the Midwest in a new home. Up to the last minute, my supervisor and director decided to hire someone they knew from a previous work setting. They were, however, optimistic that another full-time position would come up in the next year as they finalize the yearly budget in the next few months. I was assured that I would be strongly considered for the position. Despite the minor set back, I was offered and had accepted a “permanent part-time” position with my ideal organization. In the mean time, I took on another full-time position as a temporary financial patch for my daily living expenses, but I continued to work my part-time position during the weekends.

Two months after hiring the new full-timer, who I will refer as Guy in this blog, Guy took on a couple of interns and hired another part-time individual who could be in the office during the weekday working hours. On top of that, Guy half jokingly said I was too expensive for the organization and told me I need not get access to my company email anyway since there were plans to scrap my account. I was even asked to come in during the weekday to train the interns and part-time to do my job. They were not up front with me about it but I knew I was being phased out of the organization.

So now I’m back to square one and feeling pretty bad due to the fact that I am now sucked back into a situation which I had attempted to avoid in the first place. I am stuck in a passionless job with a dead end future. Despite this sentiment, one can still make out a sliver of silver lining in the clouds. This job has helped me moved on personally and professionally in several ways. For one thing, the income has allowed me to get a beautiful and comfortable home. I was able to achieve one of my goals in becoming financially independent. The status of my position within the company will help me gain credibility when being considered for future jobs. Lastly and best of all, it has done wonders in my self confidence. If I could handle and even improve my work in such a chaotic and stressful environment, I can, from now on, confidently say I am a fast learner and can handle any kinds of stresses in a working environment. This company believed in me and gave me the opportunity to challenge myself, and now I am a better person because of it. Regardless of how grateful I am to this company, I am reminded that life is short and I need to spend it elsewhere, where it would better benefit the growth and the success for both, the organization and myself. As for the original ideal organization, if and when I am let go, it would only be their loss. I will find the perfect position where I can dedicate my time and where my work and creativity can fully be appreciated. I am a young workaholic, looking for a place to dedicate all my long working hours to. As for now, I need to concentrate on the priorities of my life…VACATION! Where should we go next?