Tickle your whiskers with Calis Jokes

Top 10 Things You'll Never Hear a Sub say to their Master

#10 How was I supposed to know I wasn't supposed to put your leather pants in the washer?

#9 Yeah, right... SPANK THIS!

#8 Tomorrow night, I get to tie you up, right?

#7 God, you Dom's think the world should bow before you!

#6 And just what do you think you are going to do with that paddle?

#5 Sorry, I got a date tomorrow night. Some other time, perhaps?

#4 Spanking? I-THINK-NOT!

#3 Who died and left you in charge?

#2 Do your own damn laundry!

And the #1 thing you will never hear a sub say to their Master...

What do I look like, your maid?

 

TOP 10 REASONS WHY CYBER SEX IS BETTER

10. If the date goes bad, changing your Screen Name is easier then changing your real name.

9. Bathing, dressing, supplying atmosphere is optional.

8. If you get drunk and blackout, you only wake up next to a keyboard.

7. You can exercise your offensive habits without embarrassing yourself.

6. Viagra! Who needs Viagra?

5. Your partner could have more of a personality than your inflatable riends.

4. Three words: No shotgun weddings.

3. All guys look like George Clooney and all women like Pamela Anderson.

2. They never have to know you live in your parents basement.

1. If you catch a virus, only your computer dies

Top 10 ways to make the Iggy List

10. Pretend your a guy, but really your a lesbian and want in my skirt

9. Stalking bores me quickly

8. Being an asshole

7. Major typos are a no no

6. Less then 65 w.p.m.....::yawn::..time is ticking buddy boy!

5. No I said I don't want to meet you for the millionth time!

4. You can't figure out why I have porn on my profile, yet I won't cyber you

3. Because I'm me get over it!

2. Repeated invites.................NO MEANS NO

1. Cuz I have the power to do it!!

 

Top 10 Ways To Get On A Friends List

10. Put porn on your profile

9. Say it's you in those pics

8 Tell him he is the only guy for you!

7. Cyber so good

6. Phone sex, my treat!

5. Cams...............gawd I love #5

4. I'm sitting here naked..........really I am

3. Wanna cum with me? Put me on your list

2. Fuck I'm horny and love it in the ass. Wanna play?

1. I'm home alone