*****
Prologue : The Four

I am an angel.

For years, I'd thought I was only a normal human being. A woman. Everything changed the moment, the exact moment, I turned 18. That's when I remembered. My body might be the one of a 20 year old woman, but my spirit is one of an ageless force. I am an angel. One of the *Four*.

Four angels that helped bring this world to life. We helped create the souls. We helped create heaven. The place where souls rest. We're the soul bringers, the soul searchers. Each one of us has a purpose. I am wisdom.

The others are Love, Life and Destiny. We designed the souls, giving them a part of each of our gifts.

Raphael, the angel of love, found a sister soul to each one of them, they are called soul mates. He never cared for human laws, or morals, he looked at the souls and not at the people bearing them. Male, female, young, old, the only thing he looked for was affinities. That's how love was created. When two souls complete each other seamlessly, they are soul mates. They are lovers.

Michael, the angel of life, created the seed of life. He brought life to every soul, breathing his gift in them. When life goes away, the souls are returned to heaven, where they wait for a new life.

Uriel, the angel of destiny, sees. He sees the futures. The ones that could and the ones that should. He creates each soul's destiny. He creates their purpose. Guides them through the path of life towards their ultimate destiny.

I am Gabrielle, the bearer of wisdom. I give wisdom to all souls that they may treasure the gifts given by my brethren, use them fully and wisely. Some receive greater wisdom that they may guide the warriors. Those who will fight against evil and protect this creation.

When a battle is to come, the *four* come together and see. They look for flaws, fears. If those are too great one of them is sent. This time, it was me.

I was sent to live a normal life. A human life. I had friends. I had love. My parents took it all away from me. I could feel. I could feel what the others felt. I was a freak.

I am an empath. It's not a disease. It's not a 'condition'. It's not a mental illness. It's what I am. It's what I was born for. I was born to help. Help through what I feel. Sometimes, the feelings are so strong, I can't seem to be able to distance myself from them. Human fears are the worst. Fear of the dark, fear of the unknown. I was an unknown. They feared me. They shouldn't have. When the day came, the memories of my former being, my purpose, were restored to me. Now, I am ready. They need me. I'm going to help them.

I will return to Sunnydale.

*****
Part 1: Revelations

Wesley was sitting in a comfortable chair, reading. A pot of tea by his side and gentle classical music playing in the background. His apartment was masculine but comfortable, warm and safe. The last safe place for him. But even that seemed to be leaving him.

As he tried to concentrate on the book his thought drifted to recent events. In particular Lilah.

He wondered why she had been able to manipulate him so easily. What was he thinking? Sleeping with her and letting her control him like that? Why had he succumbed to her when he found her repellent? 'Dear god, she was simply using me to achieve her own aims and I let her, just how much of a fool have I become?'

He thought back to the previous night. It had been good, great even, but so hollow, empty, like being with a mannequin. Oh she was warm, physically beautiful and extremely imaginative in bed, but there was no inner beauty, no soul. 'And she had the nerve to tell me I was losing mine'

He shuddered at the memories that were threatening to overwhelm him and drown him in misery. He steeled himself against the threatening tears, refusing to give in.

He glanced at his book again and sighed, God but he missed his friends. no. they were no longer his friends. Reaching out for his cup he was startled by the doorbell.

"Bloody hell" He swore softly as he slopped tea onto his trousers.

Looking at the door he wondered who could be on the other side He had asked them to never return and he knew they would listen to him, he could think of nobody who would be willingly seeking him out.

He walked slowly to the door and peered through the spy hole. He saw a red head and it took him a moment to realise who she was.

'Justine?' "What is *she* doing here?" He muttered under his breath.

He opened the door and simply stared at her.

She dropped her eyes on the floor. Not looking at him. After a moment, she glanced up nervously twisting her hands together.

"Wesley?" she said softly. "I really need to speak to you, there's something you need to know."

He stared at her, no expression on his eyes, not saying anything. Then, finally, he said with venom. "Then say your piece and leave."

This was the woman who'd slashed his throat, hell she was partly responsibly for the mess that his life had become.

"I... I'm sorry... I..." Justine stuttered.

"Look Justine, just say what you want to say then leave, I have no wish to speak to you."

"I know. I'm sorry. But. this is really important." She said, looking everywhere but at him. "Please, it'll only take a minute, can I come in?"

Wesley sighed heavily, he looked at her, then stood aside and gestured her in.

"What is it about?" He asked as he closed the door.

"Please. can I.?" She motioned towards the sofa and he looked at her, seeing her properly for the first time. She looked exhausted, only a step or two from collapsing. The strong women was now only a shadow of herself.

Broken, sad and tired.

"Yes, sit." He said, his ingrained manners coming to the fore. He caught himself before he offered her tea. 'This woman is the enemy.' He reminded himself.

He remained standing, watching her closely, he didn't trust this woman at all. What could she possibly want with him now?

She sat and stared at the floor, then spoke quietly. "It's... It's about Angel... and... and Connor."

Wesley was stunned, but didn't show it.

Justine began to talk, telling Wesley everything that had happened on the beach and the boat, her voice wavering at times and eventually breaking as she started to sob.

As he listened, Wesley grew more and more horrified. Angel's own son had committed this. this. atrocity against his own father. The Englishman had seen truly awful deeds in his time with the council and later as he worked with Angel, but this appalled him. It rivalled some of the horrors Angelus himself had inflicted. The thought of what Angel must have felt as he watched his son seal the crate brought tears to his eyes.

When Justine had finally finished, he sat heavily in the chair unable to speak for a few moments, he took deep breathes and tried to calm himself. Even after what Angel had done to him, he couldn't bear to think of Angel suffering like this.

Eventually he looked up at Justine. "Why are you telling me this? Isn't it what you wanted all along?"

"I... I..." She stuttered. "I thought I did, and I hate Angelus. what he is. but." She looked up in Wesley's eyes. "It's for Connor, he won't be able to live with what he has done, and believe me or don't, but I do care about the boy." She looked back to her hands. "I don't want him to suffer the way I have."

Wesley looked at her disbelievingly. "You took that child from my arms and gave him Holtz and now you say you care?"

A spark appeared in Justine's eyes. "That was for his own good, he would have had a better life with us than with that. that. vampire." She looked up with venom in her eyes. "He would have destroyed his innocence. corrupted him."

"Don't you think the dimension where he was sent did that pretty well too?" Wesley asked, interrupting her line of thought. "Anyway, that's what I thought too. That he would be safer away. But I was wrong." Wesley told her looking down. "I saw them at the bar, fighting together for YOUR life."

She looked up at him, the fight gone from her eyes. "I know, I..I was wrong"

Eventually he looked up at Justine. "You will help me set this right"

"Yes. I'll do. whatever it takes"

Wes nodded, satisfied. "Good, I shall go to see Gunn, we're going to need all the help we can get, you wait here."

*****
Part 2: Realisations

'Oh Bloody Hell! That hurts! Must have been a demon. My head feels like it's been walked over a few times.' He tried to open his eyes and winced as a sharp pain shot through his body. "Bloody Hell!" He laid on his back and tried to relax.

Finally managing to open his eyes, he looked around from his position on the floor of the almost pitch black cave. Not recognizing his surroundings, he was instantly alert for any danger. He slowly pushed himself up and groaned as his body protested the movement, he looked around but could see very little.

He knew he was alone, but something told him he wasn't out of danger. Something was very wrong. A thought was niggling the back of his mind... something he should remember?

Suddenly, his head felt like fire and he took it between his hands. "Ahhhhh!"

Faces began to flash before his eyes... starting with the first life he took and moving through the years up to his last victim before he was taken by the Initiative. The feelings that accompanied each face were agonizing and he cried out in fear and sorrow as guilt hit him.

"No" He whispered. "What have I done. so many... what have I done?" He buried his face in his hands and began to sob brokenly. He thought about Buffy and how he had attacked her, of the two slayers he had brutally killed, of all the ones he had threatened and tortured. The remorse overwhelmed him.

"Stupid demon!" He screamed in anger and sorrow. "I didn't ask for my soul you stupid pouf."

For hours, he cried, his sobbing echoing on the walls of the cave. He cried for all those he killed, for all the souls he had taken. He cried for all those he watched Dru kill, for those that Angelus tortured, those he could've helped and didn't, those he loved to watch, and those whose agony he simply ignored.

All those people who had died because of his actions or inaction, they all screamed in his head. How could someone live with all those voices in their head and not lose their sanity? He couldn't go on like this, the guilt was overwhelming. Too many voices, they were all screaming their pain and terror, their anger at him.

"What have I done? What have I done?"

He stumbled to his feet and began to run, he didn't know where he was going, he just knew he had to get away from the voices.

As he staggered into the dark night the voices followed him. They wouldn't leave him.

"Nonononono. leave me alone. please. I didn't. I wasn't."

He walked all night not knowing where he was or where he was going. Trying to leave the pain behind. Finally, he felt dawn coming and contemplated greeting it. As he gazed at the lightening sky he felt movement behind him.

"I didn't grant you this gift so you could greet the sun."

Spinning round he stared at the shaman from the cave. "But I can't stand this... I didn't ask you for this."

"You can and you did vampire."

"Please... take it away? Make me as I was before this."

"I cannot. The soul is there to stay. You are as you were before."

"Nononono... please." He faltered... wasn't that just what so many of his victims had cried at him? A fresh wave of guilt overwhelmed him and bloody tears fell from his eyes as he crumpled to the ground.

"You will learn to live with it. You're not alone. Someone else can help you."

Spike lifted his face and looked at the demon. "What do you mean, I'm not alone? All the people that know me hate me. Who... who can possibly want to help me? I'm nothing... I'm a murderer, a monster. All those things I did... Bloody Hell! It's just too much. Let me die. That's all I deserve." Misery overwhelmed him again and he wept.

The demon looked almost kindly at the distraught vampire sobbing at his feet. "No, vampire, you deserve more. You are not alone, you have more than you think. Your friends will help you. Find your sire. He won't turn his back on you. He needs you as much as you need him right now. Go."

With that word there was a blinding burst of light and Spike felt a jolt

As his sight cleared he realised he was in some sort of old warehouse or factory. He took a deep breath then climbed to his feet and looked around, spotting a window he stumbled over and rubbed at the dirt to see outside

Traffic, people... and bright sunshine... he flinched back and fell to the ground again. LA???? He was in LA??

As realisation hit him he remember the shaman's last words. Find your sire. He needs you. Maybe he wasn't worthless after all... maybe they could help each other. Now all he had to do was get to him.

"Find my sire? Where the hell am I suppose to find him?"

*****
Part 3: Where?

(This chapter takes right where the last epi of Angel left us. Gunn and Fred are at the Hyperion, looking around and Fred's asking.)

"Where is everybody?"

Gunn looked at Fred and shook his head. "I don't know."

Fred began to panic. "They wouldn't leave us, right? I mean, they wouldn't... go away without telling us, right?"

"I don't know Fred. I. Maybe they're just. having fun. Why don't we go bed and we'll see them in the morning. M'sure they're all fine."

Fred wrapped her arms around herself and slowly rocked on her feet. "Yeah, they'll be back, cause. they wouldn't actually *leave* us. They can't leave us. They wouldn't."

Gunn went behind her and wrapped is arms around her. "Shhh, it's gonna be all right. They'll come back. Now, up in bed girl."

Fred turned around and smiled. "Charles. you're so sweet. And yeah they're gonna be back, cause they need to, right?"

The next day.

"Charles!! CHARLES!!" Fred screamed in panic. "They're not here! CHARLES!" Fred was screaming frantically at the top of her lung.

Gunn ran down the stairs and took Fred in his arms. "Calm down Fred. Calm down." She was looking around frantically, trying to get out of her boyfriend's embrace so that she could look everywhere, yet again.

"They're not here." She kept saying that. "They're not here Charles! Where did they go? Tell me! where?"

"Listen girl." Gunn said firmly but tenderly. "They'll be okay. Angel can take care of himself, and Cordy??? She 's got the visions."

"But they left us. They left us! Charles! We're alone! All alone. all alone Charles." Fred was desperate. "This is too much for me." She babbled. "I can't deal with that. No I can't. This is too much. too much. Angel. where are you? Don't leave me alone. I can't. I can't. Please. I can't deal with that, it's too much." As she rambled, she was shaking her head in Gunn's embrace and hugging herself tightly, rocking on her feet.

"Shhh. calm down sweetheart, it's ok. I'm here. I'm here." Gunn said, hugging her more tightly to himself. As he was stroking her hair the phone rang startling them both.

*dring*

Fred lunged for the phone frantically. She pick it up "Angel??? Is that you? Angel?"

"Fred, sweetheart, is that you?"

Fred suddenly stopped screaming, surprised. Not receiving any answer, Lorne asked again. "Fred? Honey??? What is it? What's wrong?"

"Lorne?"

"I'm here sweetheart." Lorne said calmly. "Something's wrong there?"

"It's all of them. They... they left us! they're all gone!" She was sobbing.

"Honey? Try to calm down for me. and tell me. Who's gone?"

Lorne was worried. Fred just didn't freak out like this anymore. Something must be very wrong.

"Angel!! and Cordelia and Connor. They're all gone!"

"Fred. Fred. calm down honey, please. Is anyone there with you?

She was screaming in the phone. "They left us. They left us Lorne"

"Fred. listen to me sweetie. are you alone there?" Receiving only sobbing for answer, he asked again. "Is someone with you?"

"Gunn. He's here... but all... all..." She stopped. She was sobbing too much, she couldn't continue.

Gunn gently pulled the receiver from Fred's hand and folded her into his arms. "Lorne?"

"Gunn. what on earth has happened. Fred sounds hysterical" Lorne asked, clearly worried. He was standing on the balcony outside his very new apartment, looking at the busy city below him. He just loved the view.

"I'm not sure man, Angel went to meet Cordy. said he'd be back later, haven't been able to find Groo or Cordy. none of them are answering their cells"

"So Angel went to meet Cordy huh?" Lorne went on. "Knew those little love bugs would get together soon." Lorne's voice was filled with mischief and a hint of happiness. He was truly happy that Angel and Cordy had found each other. Finally.

"Lorne. focus. they're all missing!"

"What do you mean they're all missing?"

"That's what I'm trying to tell you man. They should all have come back yesterday. and they didn't."

"Oh. You're sure they didn't just. lets say. sleep somewhere else?" Lorne said with innuendo.

"I know Angel and Groo are freaked by technology, but Cordy would be answering her cell. something's wrong. really wrong"

"I don't know Gunn. They might just be. doing something else."

As Gunn was about to answer the door swung open and Wes walked in hesitantly

"Wesley!! You're here!!" Fred screamed pulling out of Gunn's arms and running towards the other man. "Wesley!! They're gone! You'll help us right? They're all gone!!"

"Fred. it's alright, I'm here to help." He looked at the other man and nodded "Gunn"

"Gunn? Who's there?" Lorne asked worried and a little curious.

Gunn nodded back to Wes. "It's Wes." He answered Lorne, surprised to see the Englishman.

"What is HE doing there?" Lorne asked in shock.

"I don't know. but we need his help so right now I don't really care"

Fred was now wrapped into Wesley's arms and Gunn felt something rise in his stomach.

"Shhh, Fred calm down." The other man said softly in her ear.

Gunn dropped the phone on the counter and strode over to where his girlfriend and once best friend stood. Pulling Fred from his arms, he looked at the other man.

"Wes man. what brings you here?"

Wes looked up at him and got straight to the point. "I know where Angel is."

"Where? Where is he? Is he... is he alive? Or dead? or... no, he's already dead. I mean, he's still... unliving right?"

"What do you mean man. what did you. have you done something?"

On the other side of the line, Lorne look at the receiver a little shocked. ."Gunn??"

"No, you didn't! You didn't Wes. Right? You wouldn't?"

Wesley was a little hurt that they could believe he would hurt Angel.

"You couldn't hurt him right? I mean... he kinda almost killed you but... it was only because he was hurt... but you wouldn't? You wouldn't hurt him. I know you wouldn't." Fred was frantic in Gunn's arms.

No matter what had happened between them Wesley still respected the vampire. He would never want anything to happen to him

"No, I haven't 'done' anything to him." Wesley shook his head. "I have had a visitor though. who knows exactly where he is. and how he came to be there"

"How? Who? Where??? How do we get him back??" Fred was almost crying.

"Please, do calm down Fred. I'll tell you everything you want to know." Wesley took a deep breath and continued. "Justine came so see me, she told me it was Connor, Angel's son."

Gunn slowly lead Fred to the lobby couch and helped her sit down. Fred's head shoot up at Wesley's revelation.

"Connor? No, he can't... he was... he liked him."

Fred was looking at her hands. "They were almost friends and Angel and him were even training together. Angel showed him all." Fred slowed down as realisation hit her.". his tricks. He showed him all his tricks! That's how Connor got to him!"

At this point, Wesley spotted the phone on the counter and while Gunn was fussing over his girl he went to replace it in the hook. As he lifted it he heard Lorne's frantic voice on the other end.

"Gunn! Gunn? Are you there? What's happening? Gunn?"

Wesley raised the phone to his ear. "Lorne? It's Wesley, I think you'd better come home"

"Wesley? What happened?" Lorne was a little shocked to be talking to him.

"It's Angel, he's going to need your help. Please, you must come now"

Lorne shook his head. 'I didn't even had time to settle here and they're already getting in the way. But I can't leave them when they need me.' "All right, I'll take the next plane to LA. I'll be there tomorrow morning at the most."

"Thank you Lorne, I'll explain everything when you arrive"

"All right. You take care of Fred. She needs the two of you now."

"I will. See you soon." Relieved, he replaced the receiver and looked over to his two former friends

Wesley went to Fred's side and sat down on the couch.

"Angel has been betrayed by Connor, Fred." He took her hand, glancing over at Gunn.

Gunn gave him an unreadable look then put his arm around the woman sitting between them.

"But... ok, Connor knew every trick and... and... they were training together... but Why?? why would he betray him?"

"I'm afraid it's rather a long story. I received a visit from Justine tonight and she had rather a lot to say."

Fred looked at Wes in shock. "Justine?? but don't she hate you?" She asked interrupting him.

"I don't think that matters anymore, she needed to tell us of what has happened and I was the easiest one to get to."

Gunn looked at Wesley his mouth wide open. "Man. you're telling me that little squirt managed to overpower Angel?"

"Yes, he had the element of surprise and apparently knew all of Angel's fighting techniques." He went on to tell them what he had learned all the while squeezing Fred's hand in reassurance. Fred squeezed his hand in return and settled into Gunn's arms.

By the end of his story Fred was sobbing openly, and both men moved to comfort her. Their hands brushed and both looked up in surprise at the electricity they felt. They looked into each other's eyes.

Wesley slowly backed away and Gunn drew Fred deeper into his arms, whispering in her ear. all the while looking at Wesley.

The older man couldn't take his eyes away from them, but the feeling he felt wasn't jealousy, but longing. He blushed and looked away.

"We should get prepared. I don't know what we'll need, but according to Justine, he's pretty deep. I give us a week maximum. After that. We need to move soon, anything could happen to him down there. in a week he could have drifted miles already."

*****
Part 4: Reconstruction

The Magic Box was quickly coming back to shape. In the last week, the Scoobies had cleaned up most of the mess and walls and windows had been repaired. The roof was still open, but the construction workers were dealing with it.

Dawn and Buffy were sitting at the table going through the books and chatting quietly. Most of the books were a complete loss, but others were still usable.

"Buffy, I'm just saying. there must have been a reason behind what he did."

"Dawn, I really don't want to talk about it. Can you pass me that book?" She asked pointing out a book by her sister's elbow.

Dawn did as she asked and tried again.

"I just don't understa-"

"Dawn...please" Buffy interrupted her again.

"But, you forgave Willow and she tried to end the world!!"

"That's not the same thing at all"

Dawn sighed. "But why not?"

"Listen Dawn, it's hard to explain ... it's not... something I wanna talk about just now. I just can't talk about it yet"

"Fine." Dawn sulked as she continued checking the books and Buffy just sighed. How was she supposed to explain to her teenage sister that the man. vampire she'd come to trust was the same creature who had attempted to rape her?

Giles walked into the room with a box of nails for Xan and smiled at the girls shaking his head.

He approached the busy young man and handed him the box. "There you go Xander."

"Thanks." Xander said smiling. His arms were high above him, holding the frame in place. "Can you help me though, this is really a two man job."

"Of course. What is it you want me to do?"

"Can you nail? or maybe you could hold the frame while I nail it."

"Perhaps it would be best if I hold it for you, I'm afraid I'm not very talented when it comes to carpentry"

Xander laughed lightly. "Yeah, you tell yourself that G-man, I'm sure you have some hidden talent you don't wanna tell us about." He said teasingly.

Giles laughed back. God he had missed the boy's teasing. And yes, he had some hidden talents, but he wasn't sure Xander would want him to tell him about them. Huh, where did that thought come from?

He held the frame in position and watched as Xander drove the nails home, admiring the muscles working in his arms

"What you looking at G-man?" Xander asked.

"Oh. er. nothing. just thinking." Giles blushed slightly. "I wonder how Willow is feeling today"

"I don't know." Xander said. "I think she's getting better and better, but she won't let us come near her just yet. I went by this morning, she was hidden in her room and wouldn't come out."

Giles nodded. "She will be having a great deal of difficulty coming to terms with all that has happened. She needs your support now more than ever"

Xander nodded and looked down. "I just wish we could do more, you know. I feel helpless."

"I'm sure she appreciates everything you're doing, I'm afraid it's just going to take time"

"Yeah. I get that. Time is key. But I want to do something for her. and I just don't know what."

Giles wanted to comfort Xander but was unsure of what to do. He looked up and seeing the frame would hold, he let go of it and placed a hand on Xander's shoulder.

"You are helping her, just by being there for her when she needs you"

Xander smiled, tears in his eyes. "I know. I'm always gonna be there for her." He sigh. "Sometimes, I just wish I could make it all ok. but that's impossible."

"Yes. I'm afraid it is, but things will get better, I can promise you that" Giles said warmly. "And you do make it better, just by being there."

Xander smiled and nodded at Giles. "Thanks. I needed that."

Xander look up at Giles and noticed how warm his gaze were. how comfortable he felt being there with him. his hand still on his shoulder. Xander got lost in Giles' eyes. For a brief moment, time stopped.

As Giles looked back at Xander he felt something tighten in his stomach. His heart began to beat faster and his grip tightened on the young man's shoulder. It was the first time he'd felt this way around him.

Xander's eyes widened. For a brief moment he was sure he'd seen. no, it couldn't be.

Dawn dropped a book loudly on the floor and the spell was broken. "Oh. Sorry."

Xander turned around blushing slightly. What had gotten into him? Warm, fuzzy feelings for Giles? No way.

Giles cleared his throat and spoke. "Um...yes...well I think I'll make some tea...would anyone like some?

"Yeah... I'll take some dirty water. Thanks."

"Really Xander, if you'd rather something else all you need do is say so"

"Uh... You have beer? I NEED a beer right now, a really manly beer." Xander said babbling.

"Yes, I think I can accommodate you, there are some cans in the fridge I believe, I'll bring you one out."

Giles was grateful for the excuse and hurried out of the room

Xander turned and went back to his work.

Giles walked into the kitchen and leaned against the door trying to gather his thoughts.

What on earth had just happened out there? Xander was like a son to him. He had never thought of him any other way. But when he looked into his eyes he had felt. something.

Something very warm and completely inappropriate, he was the children's father figure for goodness sake, he shouldn't be thinking this way. But as he thought back to the feel of Xander's shoulder under his hand and the look in the young man's eyes. No. "Rupert, get a hold of yourself." He said to himself sternly.

He prepared the tea, good very fatherly like tea and took a beer out for Xander. Xander, who thought of him as a father, an authority figure, and who was very not gay.

As Giles walked off to the kitchen Xander felt his cheeks burn. What the hell had just happened?

He had seen attraction in Giles' eyes. he was sure, and was stunned to realise it wasn't one sided. How could he feel like that? He wasn't gay. He'd never felt this way about any man. and look. Anya! Sex. almost marriage. so very not gay. But still, he'd felt something, and it felt good.

His heart was beating wildly as he turned back to his work. He lifted the hammer again and realised his hands were trembling. He tried to shake the thought out of his head. 'Gotta concentrate here Xanman, no more bad thoughts about the G-man.'

Xander heard Giles come back and stared hard at his hammer, determined not to turn. He felt a tap on his shoulder and Giles handed him the beer.

"Thanks." Xander said, still shaking as he took the beer from Giles' hands. "Really need that now." He opened the can and gulped it down, draining almost half the beer.

"You were very thirsty. You should have said something sooner." Giles said amazed.

"Well, you kinda forget about those things when you lift heavy things and make repairs all day." Xander said smiling.

"Yes, I expect you would. I think it's wonderful that you finally found something you enjoy doing. After all the unusual jobs you've had."

"Yeah, the ones I couldn't keep more than a week. I know. I love working in construction. Repairing things. Building things. It's like a kid's dream, you know." Xander said smiling proudly.

"I am proud of you Xander, you do know that don't you?" Giles said gently.

"Yeah dad, I know." Xander teased. Giles rolled his eyes and shook his head.

"Thanks Giles."

"What for?" Giles asked surprised.

"For coming back, for being there for us...and well...for just being you" Giles looked at Xander and suddenly realized that the young man in front of him had grown up.

"Oh Xander, I couldn't have left you all forever, you're my family" he said with a lump in his throat. "You do know I only left because Buffy needed to stand on her own two feet, I was holding her back"

Xander nodded. "Yeah, I know that, but Giles, the rest of us need you too"

Giles blinked back the threatening wetness in his eyes and swallowed. "I'm here to stay this time Xander...I promise you"

Xander smiled and couldn't contain himself. He reached for the older man and hugged him tightly. "We missed you G-man" He whispered in the older man's ear.

"Well, I hope so. If not, what would I have come back for?" And hugged the young man back just as tightly.

At that moment they were pounced by the two girls that had been watching silently. "We want hugs too!!!" Dawn squealed.

Giles laughed and put his arms around all of them...he'd missed this so much

"Okay...this isn't getting the shop repaired...how about you get back to work and I'll order us some food"

Xan grinned and extracted himself from the group. "Mmmm, pizza?" He said smiling dreamily.

While Giles ordered pizza, the girls returned to their seats and Xander walked out of the room to get the tools he needed.

*****
Part 5: Coming back

The door bell startled Giles and he looked up. A young women, not more than 20 years old was just coming in.

"Hello, I'm sorry young lady but we're closed for maintenance. If you come back next week, we should have reopened then." He smiled at her. She turned towards him and smiled back.

"I know, I'm sorry to disturb you, but I'm looking for an old friend of mine. I went to his parents and they told me I might find him here." She had her hands tangled in front of her and looked really shy.

"What's the name of your friend? I'm sure we can help you find him." Giles said really gently.

Before the young women could answer, Xander came back from the backroom and stopped dead in his tracks at the sight of the newcomer.

"Gabby? Is that really you?" He asked surprised. She nodded shyly. Dropping all the tools he was holding he ran to her and enfolded her in a bear hug.

"God, it's been so long! Where have you been? What brings you back? What happened?" He couldn't stop himself from asking so many questions at the same time. He had missed her so much.

"You haven't changed Xander." She said smiling warmly, then grimaced. "You're strangling me now." She was breathless.

"Uh, sorry!" He loosened his hold, but still had his arms around her shoulders. "It's so good to see you Gab! We really thought you were. gone." He had tears of joy in his eyes.

She looked over his shoulder and realised three people were looking at them, intrigued.

"Xander? Can you introduce us?" Dawn asked shyly. Xander turned around and looked at them smiling.

"Guys! This." He said waving at Gabrielle. "This is Gabby!" He turned back to his friends. "Gabby, this is Dawn, her sister Buffy and that's Giles."

Gabrielle smiled at them and shook their hands. "Hi." She said shyly.

"Hi! It's great to meet one of Xander's friends." Buffy said smiling.

"Indeed." Giles said sincerely

"But how come we've never heard of you before?" Buffy asked looking at Xander. "We've known him for six years."

Xander blushed. "Sorry guys. Gab was. is. kinda a difficult subject for me." Gabrielle smiled softly. She could feel his pain at thinking of how she had left them. It must have been so hard on them.

"Yeah. I kinda disappeared without a trace nine years ago." She said. "I can understand how it would've been hard to talk about me. for them."

"Them?" Dawn asked curiously.

"Willow and Jesse. You know them right?" She glanced back to her old friend "Xander?" Xander dropped his eyes at the mention of his dead friend.

"We know Willow all right, but Jesse." Dawn said. Gabrielle looked at her, she could feel Xander's sadness and it was overwhelming.

"Jesse. died six years ago." Xander interrupted. "He was killed." Gabrielle stared at him in shock and feeling their pain and despair, their overwhelming guilt and sadness was too much for her. She fell to her knees and wept.

Xander knelt beside her and took her in his arms. Giles gave the girls a look and they went back to their work, leaving the reunited friends to weep.

"Shhh, it's all right Gab." Xander said softly to his old friend.

"I can't believe he's dead. He was so. sweet. and funny and. and." She cried brokenly, not able to stop. The young girl within her had loved the young man just as much as Willow had loved Xander. It was awful to think she wouldn't be able to see him. And to know he had already been gone for so long, when she had always dreamed of seeing him again.

"I remember how close you two were. I'm so sorry Gab. We tried to find you, Willow and I, but we never found a single trace." Xander hugged her tightly to his chest. "You completely disappeared. And there was no way for us to find out where you were."

"I know, I wanted to get in touch, ring you or write you, but they wouldn't let me"

"Who they?"

"Well, it's kind of a long story. You remember how I always knew what you guys were feeling?"

"Yeah... that was kinda weird but... it was cool too."

"My parents didn't think it was cool, they thought I had a mental problem...they took me to a doctor in Boston and he put me in a hospital"

"In a hospital? What do you mean?" Xander asked worried.

"A mental hospital Xander, my parents had me committed to an institution."

Xander's eyes widened and he looked into Gabby's eyes. "You're kidding right? Why would your parents do that?" He sat on the floor, his hands on her shoulders. "I mean... they were the most normal of all our parents together... It's something MY parents would do... not yours!"

"They thought they were doing the best thing for me I guess. I don't know, I just know it happened and that's where I've spent the last nine years of my life."

"Wow... I mean, not wow in the sense that it's great, but wow. I never believed that's what had happened... I mean, we thought... well that you were... your parents called ours and told them that you were really sick and that they were taking you to see a doctor. Then sometime later, they called again and said you... were not here anymore... they didn't say you were dead... but that's what we thought." Xander was almost crying. "How was it? Nine years... it's a lot..."

"Oh god Xander, it was so awful at first. surrounded by people that had so many problems, their feelings...I felt them all, you see that's my gift, I'm an empath...but I couldn't make it stop, I couldn't shut them out. I think for a while I really did lose my mind." She paused for a moment trying to control her emotions. "But eventually I did learn how to block them, how to only feel certain ones, the ones I wanted to feel. then it got easier, I lived there for so long that it really began to seem like home"

Xander was in shock. It took a time for all to register in his mind. "Huh. You're an empath?" He asked raising an eyebrow. "What's that?"

Giles came behind him. "It's a person that feels all of what others feel. They receive the emotions of others." He knelt beside Gabrielle. "It must have been awful for you to live around all those people for so long. I suppose you need calm more than any of us do."

"You mean she can feel all I feel?" Xander asked incredulously. "Huh. It's not that bad, but... well, I saw weirdest things around here... with this being the Hellmouth and all."

"Huh, Hellmouth?" Gabby asked.

Xander perked up at this. "Oh I know this one, the Hellmouth is a center of mystical convergence and evil is drawn to it, vampires, demons, you name it they love it. We got one here, under the remains of the school and every now and then some nasty tries to open it and we stop 'em." Xander leaned back and looked at Gabby, "Um. did I mention that vampires are real?"

Gabrielle looked up in shock. "Huh, what? Demons? Vampires? You hit your head Xan?"

She looked at Giles questioningly and he shook his head.

"I'm afraid he's quite serious Gabrielle, if a little unusual in his explanations. All those things, vampires, demons, werewolves, incubi, succubae they're all real... and drawn to the energy of the Hellmouth itself. We have in recent years fought a demon mayor, more vampires than I care to remember and even a Hell goddess. Yes, I'm afraid it's all very real. There's just one more thing I think you ought to know, Buffy here. well. she's a vampire slayer, the one girl in all the world chosen to fight vampires and prevent the spread of their evil."

Gabby looked over at Buffy, who grinned and nodded, then sat staring at Xander and Giles. She appeared stunned and Xander bounced a little. He'd missed her so much.

"Look, lets not talk about vamps and hellmouthy things. I want to spend time with you!! It's so great that you're here and I have so much to tell you and so many stories and then, we're gonna go see Wills, she'll be happy to see you too..."

"Oh, and maybe that'll help her to get out a little." Dawn said, interrupting Xander.

"Help her to get out? What do you mean?" Gabrielle asked looking at Xander. The young man looked away.

"Something... happened a week ago and she... hasn't been out of her room since."

"What happened?" She could feel all their pain and fears swallowing her and she shivered. "It must have been really bad." She said looking at them. Then she caught Xander's eyes. "Oh and so sad!" Not able to distance herself, she began to cry again. "You're all so sad..."

"No Gabby, it's okay. It's been a rough few weeks and some really bad things have happened but honestly, everything'll be fine...please don't cry?"

Xander reached out and pulled her into another hug, he rocked her gently as she cried out all the pain she was getting from the others. After a while she calmed and looked up at him. She smiled at her old friend's attempt to comfort. God had she missed him.

"I'm sorry, it's just, I was receiving all your pain. All four of you... and it was too much for me. Please... tell me what happened. Maybe... maybe I can help her..."

"First off, she's gay." Xander said bluntly.

Gabrielle laughed lightly and nodded. "All right. She's gay. Huh... that's a change."

Xander smiled in triumph. He had made her laugh. "That's where it gets bad... She started going out with this girl two years ago..." Gently, he told her about Willow and magic and about Tara. Finally, he reached the end of the story. Buffy was gently rocking a sobbing Dawn in her arms, while Giles had his hand on Xander's shoulder, silently supporting the young man, his eyes damp.

Xander looked up at him over Gabby's head and tears welled in his own eyes. He had worked all his courage to tell the story, but now, it was too much. Buffy came over and knelt beside him, she touched his other shoulder and then took Gabby from his arms, rocking her gently.

As he stood Giles put an arm around his shoulder. That proved too much for the tenuous hold he had on his emotions and he broke down, Giles holding him tightly.

After a few minutes Xander calmed down. Feeling drained he reluctantly untangled himself from Giles' embrace and turned to the girls on the floor.

He reached for Gabby and dried her tears. "It's all right... Shhh, we'll go see her. I'm sure she'll feel much better after seeing you." He smiled lightly and she smiled back. She nodded.

"Yeah. I'll feel better when I've seen her anyway." She looked around at the others kneeling on the floor. "I feel like I already belong here."

The others smiled. "Welcome to the family." Dawn said.

"Yup, another Scooby!" Buffy exclaimed.

Giles smiled at her enthusiasm and still feeling Xander's warmth in his arms, he stood up. "The more the merrier, they say."

Xander helped Gabby and both of them stood up, followed by Dawn and Buffy.

Giles looked around. "I think we won't get more done today."

Xander nodded. "Not really in the mood for more repairs. You said it G-man."

"Maybe you and Gabby should go home and look in on Willow. Dawn and I will clean up a little more." Buffy said looking at Xander.

"And me? What do I do?" Giles asked teasingly.

"Oh you... you just drink your tea and give us hugs. That's your purpose here." Dawn answered laughing.

Quickly the mood affected everyone and they laughed loudly.

Glancing over his shoulder and grinning at Giles Xander put his arm around Gabby's shoulder and they left the shop.

*****