Xander screamed. He wasn't afraid to admit it, he was screaming like a girl. A sissy, pansy, scared shitless girl. He couldn't help it. Any guy would be screaming like a girl at this. The body swept out of the freezer and fell at his feet. *Figures, I get in a little trouble, get detention, get assigned to cafeteria duty. Next thing you know there is a dead body. * That was the last thought that went through his mind before he fainted and landed next to the body.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Xander woke about twenty minutes later in the nurse's office. Willow was sitting next to him, concern etched so clearly on her face. He sat up trying to make her less concerned for him. It was very stupid move as all the blood raced to his head. He fell back with a groan. Willow couldn't help it and giggled at him.

"Thank you very much, glad I'm here for you to laugh at my misfortune." Xander grumbled at her while trying again to sit up, slowly this time.

"Misfortune? You sound like a pirate who lost his treasure, you only fainted." Willow laughed at him either ignoring or actually didn't see the dirty look he sent her.

"Just call me Blackbeard. Damn, my head hurts. Other than you, how many people are mocking me?"

"Well, you want the good news or the bad first?"

"Good."

"William knows, I called him, well Angel actually but he was asleep, so he promised to pass the news to Angel when he woke up."

"Oh God, William knows, that's a good week of teasing from him. I don't think I want to know what the bad news is."

"Well, look at it this way, Angel knows, that's a good few hours of doting from him. And, are you sure you don't want to know the bad, you're going to need to know this if you are going to go out and face your public, well ever again."

"Lay it on me." Xander replied with a bit of fear in his voice. *Or it could be pain from the bump on his head.* Willow thought.

"Cordelia saw the whole thing. Once she stopped the screaming of her own, she went to her posse and started telling them everything that happened."

"Damn, I hate Cordelia. Are you sure I can't use Angel as arm candy, even for a night. Make her out as the jealous bitch we all know she is. Please, please, pretty please?"

Willow just laughed at his pleading. "Maybe later, as for now, we have to go find our arm candies, quick before they go to the library and have to face Giles alone."

"Nope, we wouldn't want that. They might forget about their souls for a few minutes and accidentally rip out his throat. We wouldn't want that. Right?"

"Right. Ripping out of throats is bad. Lets go, whelp." Xander scowled at her use of Williams nickname for him, but followed her out of the nurse's office, slowly but surely.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow and Xander entered the library to, surprise, surprise, see Giles sitting behind a pile of books reading, researching. Whatever struck his fancy at that time. It wasn't that they didn't like Giles, they did. And they respected him. A lot. Even if they didn't show it. It was just that they were tired of his Watcher knows best act. They were sixteen years old and they felt that they were responsible enough to decide who they could and couldn't be in a relationship with. They knew what Angel and William were. Primal, destructive, evil, vampires. But they loved them and they entered the relationship with complete trust and faith in the two. What were they supposed to say, 'sorry, we love you and trust you with our lives, but there is a demon that lives in there with your soul, and that just makes you unacceptable.' Nope, wasn't going to happen.

Xander wander behind Giles and looked over his shoulder at the book he was reading. It was written in some foreign, dead language that Xander wouldn't be able to understand if his life depended on it. *Besides there are no color photos, what is the point in even looking at it.* "Watch ya reading, G-man?" Xander asked.

Giles jumped at the question, obviously not seeing the two until Xander had spoken. Xander laughed at the startled look on Giles face. "What a watcher, can't even watch your own back."

At that comment Giles scowled at Xander. "Yes, well I was engrossed in this book, it contains prophecies pertaining to the hellmouth that may come in handy in saving our lives. And must I ask you again not to call me that?"

"Sure thing G-man." Xander replied while Willow tried to stifle her laughter.

Giles refused to get pulled into this child like banter with the young man. He felt responsible for the children yes, he felt a fatherly protection of them, but he was not their friend. There was no time for friendship. He did not need nor want any friends, he had tried all to often to make friends. He had lost nearly all of them, either to life or death.

It was at this time the doors of the library burst open. Angel and William entered. Blood was all over Angel, so much that you were unable to where it was coming from. Xander immediately ran to Angel. Willow went to William to make sure that he was alright and with his assurance that he was in fact fine, she too turned her attention to Angel.

Xander was hovering over Angel acting very much like a mother hen caring for her chicks. "Oh my God, Angel, what happened are you okay, what happened why is there so much blood, should there be this much blood?" Angel was unsure whether to laugh at Xanders concern, to wince in pain, or comfort Xander. He chose the latter, not wanting to see his pet so worried.

"It's okay Xander, it's a few small cuts, not all this blood is mine, I got a good chunk out of the other guy, vampire," he corrected seeing the look of disdain Giles threw at him. Other than that look, Giles made no movement to help or even acknowledge the vampire. Willow however went behind the counter to get the first aid kit she now knew presided there.

Xander took it from her when she came over and began to clean where most of the blood was, his right arm. When most of the blood was cleaned he saw three long slashed that crossed his arm. "What the hell! What where you attacked by, a giant fork?"

Angel smiled at him, "No, not a fork, a vampire, he had a blade in the place of one of his arms. I got to close. I learned never to corner him in a dark alley again."

Xander got up and walked over to William. He then proceeded to smack him upside his head. "Why the hell weren't you watching his back. Making him fight something like that on his own?"

"Bloody hell," William yelled, rubbing the back of his head. "For your information, I was fighting the three minions at the time, trying to keep them of you lover boy. Don't treat me like that again."

"Or what?" Xander asked with a hint of menace in his voice.

The near fight was broken up by laughter. Namely Angel's and Willow's. Both the vampire and human turned to the laughing pair. "Hey!" "What the bloody hell?"

"You guys look so funny, like you would actually fight or something. You look so cute." Willow said between her laughs.

"Cute?" William spit out. "I am not cute. What happened last time you called me cute?"

Willows eyes widened at this point. "No, you wouldn't. Not again. Please."

William grinned evilly and began stalking towards her, every move, the definition of predator. And at these actions, Giles stood. "Stop, I forbid you to harm one of my charges. You will not lay a hand on her."

William proceeded to ignore Giles' threat. He leapt and tackled Willow to the ground, then proceeded to tickle her to the point where she couldn't breathe.

"Please.stop.I take it.back. I promise.I won't.call you.that.again.Please.William." Willow was somehow choking these words out through her laughter. Her face was turning as red as her hair from the exertion.

Suddenly, a voice rang out over the noise being made by the couple. "I'm sorry, am I interrupting something?"

Everyone turned to look at the source of the voice. A woman in her mid to late twenties was standing in the door way. Giles started to clean his glasses vigorously. Xander raised his eyebrow at her and returned to cleaning Angel's wound. William turned to help Willow up, she was still trying to catch her breath and William realized it was up to him to be the talker.

"No, you weren't interrupting, how can we help you?"

"Well," she began, "I was just hired as the new substitute biology teacher. I was looking for someone who could help me get settled in and started on a project I have planned for the class. I'm Miss French by the way."

Miss French looked around the room. Sizing them all up, all but Willow that was, until Willow spoke. "I would be glad to help you with the project. What do you need me to do?"

Miss French sent a disgusted look her way, which quickly dissolved into a smile. "That's okay, thank you though. I need someone with a little more muscle." She walked up to Xander, and placed her hand suggestively on his arm. "How about you? Xander, right? You have plenty of muscle."

Angel didn't waste a second. He pulled Xander out of her grasp with his injured arm. He ignored the wince of pain. Xander smiled at her politely, but with a sharp, disgusted look in his eyes. "I would but I am very busy. With school and taking care of my injured boyfriend here, I just won't have time."

Miss French looked taken aback. "Oh, ok, I understand. If you change your mind I could really use your assistance."

"If I change my mind, but I doubt I will."

She smiled fiercely, a smile that all, well almost all, could see was forced. She evidently wasn't used to rejection. She then straightened her posture and turned to Giles. He actually began to blush.

At the blush, Miss French's smile became real. "And you Mr. Giles, would you care to help me. You seem strong and able." And with that statement came a snort from one of the other people in the room.

"Pl.please call me Rupert, Miss French. And I would lo.be happy to aid you in anyway possible." Someone then muttered, "I'm sure."

The comment earned a scowl from Giles, but, though it didn't seem possible, Miss French's smile grew wider. "Well, if I am to call you Rupert then you must call me Natalie. I talk to you later, in private about the project." With that she spun on her heels and left the library.

As soon as she was gone, all four attendees burst into laughter. Giles' blush returned full force and asked them if they had somewhere else to be.

"Why would we be somewhere else when you provide enough entertainment for the week," Xander asked.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

William and Angel were walking through the park. They were on their way home after taking their humans home. After leaving the library, they took them to the bronze. They personally found being their uncomfortable. However, Willow and Xander found it fun, and after the events of the day, they felt that they deserved some fun. Now, though it was time to make one final sweep of the park and go home to sleep the day away.

They were almost done when they came across Miss French, walking home they guessed. "Is it just me or does she smell, I don't know, off?" William asked Angel as they stayed out of her view.

"Yeah, she does, don't know what it is though. Must not be that big cause Angelus isn't going off."

"Neither is Spike, you must be right." They heard a noise a little down the path. "You hear that?" William asked his sire.

Angel just silently nodded as he appeared to produce a stake out of thin air.

"Shit, we have to protect her don't we?" William produced his own stake.

The same clawed man that they attacked earlier jumped out of the bushes and set after Miss French.

Angel and William set forward to protect her. Miss French just turned around and looked at the vampire. And with one glare the vampire froze and turned on his heel and ran off.

Angel and William stopped in their tracks. "Well, fuck me," William summed up.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Xander and Willow walked through the halls of beautiful Sunnyhell high school the next morning. Their topic of conversation, of course, was the new weirdness that hit the high school. In other words Miss French.

They were so caught up in their conversation that they didn't realize they were late for their biology class with said teacher. They hurried to get to the class, well, Willow hurried, she just happened to drag Xander along the way. They stood outside the door and caught their breath.

"Damn, a pop quiz." Willow said looking through the window in the door.

Xander looked in as well, "are you sure we have to go in there, we could always fake being sick. You know I did have a very tragic thing happen to me last night and I don't know how I can even stand."

His voice cut off after seeing the new scene in the room. Miss French turned to look at them at the door. The problem was that her body was facing completely away and her face was looking straight at them."

"Well, fuck me," Xander summed up. At they both turned to run.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow and Xander ran into the library when school had ended that day and burst through the door. Xander then efficiently ran over Giles both stumbling to the floor.

"Oh, thank god you're here" Willow started, "We need to talk to you about Miss French."

At that sentence, the expression that had been on Giles face, had shown anger and disgruntleness, turned into a sappy grin. "Yes, she is something," he said.

"No, you don't get it, do you? She's not human, she.she's some sort of demon. You can't be interested in her. She'll kill you."

Giles expression turned sour once again. "Honestly, Willow, I expected something like this from Xander, but I thought you had more sense than this. I must say I am rather disappointed. I am working with her to construct a project that she is trying so hard to make perfect to teach your class about the praying mantis. I don't know what you two have against her, but I'd prefer it if you got over it quickly. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a date.an appointment with Miss French at her house and I fear it will take me a while to find it." Giles left the library then with a definite air of superiority.

Willow turned to Xander, "there is something up with her and it may kill him. As much as you don't like Giles, it's up to us to save him."

"Yeah, I know, I don't suppose we could let her torture him for a little bit? Teach him a lesson for being such a dick head."

Willow just smiled, "teacher's pet."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Angel and William found the two human bent over volumes of dusty books that evening when they arrived. "What are you two doing researching, without the watcher, I thought that was his repertoire." William asked as he sat beside Willow.

She looked up at him wearily. "Miss French is some sort of demon that is after Giles. He is to blinded by her beauty that he doesn't see her for the demon she is."

William looked at Angel, a conversation quickly followed involving looks only. "Willow, why do you say she's a demon, do you have proof?"

Willow looked at him sharply. "I thought so, you have a crush on her, you asshole, leading me on." She jumped up and started storming out of the library.

William jumped up and grabbed her arm. "Willow it's not like that."

"You're saying that you don't find her the least bit attractive?"

"Well, yeah, she's attractive."

"I knew it. You, you vampire you."

"Willow, sweetie, pet, listen to me. It's not like that. She's attractive, but everything that you are, everything that is inside you and outside you is more beautiful than she could ever be if she spent the rest of her life trying to be like you. The only reason I asked if you had proof was because I don't want to chop her into a million pieces if she is human. Okay?"

Willow sighed and leaned against his chest. "yeah, I'm sorry, I'm just worried about Giles, believe it or not. He may have the British flag stuck so far up his ass that he's spitting up stripes, but he's still kind of our friend."

The three males in the room started laughing. They all were able to see Giles and his flag in their mind. Finally Angel calmed down enough to speak, "don't worry Willow, we'll save him. Are you going to tell us what you suspect, and your proof, or what?"

"Well Xander and I were late to class this morning and as we were standing outside the door she did this full on exorcist twist to look at us. It was just like a.oh.my.God. Why didn't I see if before!"

Willow jumped back from him and ran for her book bag. She pulled out her biology book and began flipping through it. She stopped on a page about half way through. She read the page carefully. Then she squealed and threw herself back in William's arms kissing him on the mouth.

Xander's curiosity was peaked, "What is it Will?"

"She's a praying mantis."

"A what?" Angel asked, the disbelief evident in his voice.

"A praying mantis, the bug, only bigger. It was all there from the beginning. Her lectures were on praying mantis. The praying mantis can turn it's head completely around. Her project is about the praying mantis."

"And that would explain why the claw was afraid of her last night," Angel finished.

"The thing is, the praying mantis only attracts men when it is looking to mate. It uses them to fertilize their eggs, then.chop their heads off." Willow said, then she browsed through her biology book again. "But, this can't be right. The mantis only goes after uncontaminated men, virgins."

The entire room fell to silence for a few seconds, each looking at the others.

"But, Giles, he couldn't be a virgin, he had to have done it at some point." Xander said, his eyes wide with disbelief.

"I always thought he was a poof," William spoke up before falling to the floor laughing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Willow searched the school records for Miss French's address and with that in tow the four of them set off to find her. As they approached the given address, Angel and William's ears perked at a sound coming from Miss French's front yard.

In the front yard, was the claw, pacing back and forth, looking at the house and growling. Angel and William once again proved their silent ability to talk. As one the two attacked the vampire. A series of growls and howls later, the claw was lying at their feet, then blowing in the wind.

"This must be the place," Angel said.

They walked up to the doorway just in time to see Miss French open the door, "Xander, and his friends, come in, it's so nice to see you."

The four walked in looking for any sign of Giles. None were forthcoming. She ushered them into the living room by grabbing Xander's arm and dragging. "Xander, can I get you something to drink?"

Xander extracted himself from her grip and backed into Angel's waiting arms. "No, thank you, we're looking for Giles, where is he?"

"I'm afraid I haven't seen him. Are you sure you don't want a drink?" Miss French's fake smile returned to her face. And with the smile came faint screams of help.

"What's that?" Willow asked the substitute.

"It's nothing, just my television."

"Bullshit," William yelled, "that's Giles."

Miss French glared at them, then her features began to distort. She grew almost twice in size and had officially become the largest bug, praying mantis, in the world. Xander looked at her with awe and fear *Wait till Ripley's gets a hold of her.*

Miss French took advantage of all their distraction and grabbed Xander. They disappeared through a door in the hallway. Angel took off after them at full vampire speed with Willow and William close at his heels.

They dove through the basement door in time to see Miss French tying Xander to the wall. He was between a cage with a screaming Giles and a large nest of eggs, each about the size a toddler.

Angel growled and leapt at the large bug producing a machete in mid air and cleanly sliced the head off the beast. He yanked Xander's restraints out of the wall and pulled him into a strong passionate kiss. Xander pulled back breathless after a couple of minutes. Angel took off his coat and put it around the boy and they walked out of the basement holding each other.

Giles cleared his throat. "If it wouldn't be to much of a bother, could you get me out of here?"

Willow walked over to the door of the cage, then looked over at William, "Can you open this?"

"Of course I can, but are you sure you want to?" William responded.

"Yes."

William sighed and pulled the door open. They walked out of the basement when Willow spoke up. "Giles, why did Miss French go after you?"

"What do you mean?" He replied.

"Well, see, the praying mantis only went after virgins." Willow said barely hiding a grin.

Gile promptly turned red and began to walk off quickly to the sounds of William and Willow laughing loudly.

*****
tbc