Horror swirled through his mind as he gazed at his own reflection. Or more truly, at the reflection of Angelus. His *true* face and not the normal gameface that he was used to seeing on vampires. Toughened green skin that would be difficult to cut or bruise, gnarled horns where he was accustomed to seeing brow ridges and prominent curves of flesh, and a maw filled with sharp piercing teeth designed to rend and tear skin and muscle. Glowing malevolent eyes that seen terrors untold stared back at him. He shuddered.

He reached out with one clawed hand and traced the lines of his reflection; the horns and curves, the edge of eye and jaw. The image frightened him. It was a twisted and warped parody of life, an evil and ugly nightmare that whispered of memories born during his centuries long exile in the demon dimension known as Hell. He had seen other faces that looked very much like his own while there. That wasn't the most horrifying or damning thing about looking into the reflection of his demon, however. The thing that upset him the most was that there was a tiny part of Angel that found this horned, fanged and green skinned monster to be beautiful. The part of him that *was* Angelus was filled with awe. This is what he would look like if he didn't require a human corpse as a host to his spirit and mystical power...the true blood demon before it merged with Liam to become the vampire Angelus.

With a raged filled cry of despair, Angel flung the silvered platter away from him only to have it clatter loudly upon the stone floor. Dropping down to his knees, he howled out his pain and self-loathing into the night, tears of blood dripping from his glowing eyes. Tremors and shivers raced along his limbs even as he rocked back and forth, his own arms wrapped around his chest in a vain attempt to comfort himself. Keening, he rocked and twitched for an unknown amount of time until he became aware of a blood warm hand rubbing gentle circles on his tense back and a soft crooning sound whispering in his ears. Slowly coming back to himself and gaining awareness of the world around him once more he found himself huddled on the floor with Cordelia trying to calm him while Wes paced and muttered to himself. Gunn stood silently, his face plainly showing his inner conflict as his eyes bounced from the two on the floor and his furiously thinking lover. The Priests were nowhere to be seen.

"Where...uh...where are the Pr..."

He never got to finish his thought. Cordelia gave a short shrug and a wane smile. "They left to go hold an emergency meeting. Wes explained what a vampire was and how you traveled from another world just to get me...which is all true. So, they had to go hold a meeting of the Covenant to figure out if your claim as my mate can be recognized or if a native demon from Pylea must be chosen."

Angel reared back in shock. While a dark and ugly part of him wanted to demand that the demon Priests do just that, the rest of him was appalled. His hissed. "How can you say that?! Look at me! I'm...I'm...hideous!"

Cordelia was about to reply when Wes cut her off absentmindedly. "I have a theory about that...among other things. I mean, when one looks at all of the various evidence, it does seem to be a logical assumption."

Almost against his will, a tiny sliver of hope was born. If there was some way to explain all of this weirdness, it might make it easier for him to live with. And Wes was smart. Very smart. If he thought that he had figured this confusing mess out, then Angel would believe him. "Wha...what do you mean?"

Wes stopped his pacing and seemed almost shocked to realize that he had everyone's full attention. He cleared his throat and shifted stance into what Angel had come to recognize as when he was about to lecture someone. He didn't care about feeling like a recalcitrant schoolboy, however; he just wanted to understand.

"First there's all of the things that you could never do before; stand in sunlight, see your reflection, etcetera. Then there is the radically changed appearance of your...uh, gameface. I think that it's all due to either some demonic element inherent of this very dimension or of the dimensional portal that we traveled through. In either case, what I believed has happened is that the two aspects of your being have been...separated further than ever before."

The clipped and precise tone of Wes' voice combined with the bloodwarm hand Cordelia was rubbing circles on his back with calmed him down greatly. Unbeknownst to himself, his features had slowly shifted from those of Angelus to those of Angel. He still didn't understand what Wes was trying to explain, however. He didn't have to say that though, Gunn did it for him with an eloquently grunted, "Huh?"

Wes sighed and began to gesture in his agitation to make them all understand. "I'm talking about Angel and Angelus. Two separate beings; one an immortal human soul and the other an immortal blood demon. They are forced to share a single body, yes; but they *are* two individuals. They share a body and each other's memories and to an extent, emotions."

Wes began pacing again, worry and excitement radiating from his tense body. "That's what makes Angel's curse just that; a curse. The merger between soul and demon is not complete. There's just enough of a mix that Angel can recall not only the events that Angelus lived through, but the emotional response the demon had to those events. That's why Angel can feel guilty about things that he didn't do. However, if the two were merged too much more, then the guilt would fall away under a wash of *understanding* and *empathy*. After all, a human soul *can* be twisted into darkness."

Angel nodded; he was able to follow so far. "But what does all of that have to do with what's happening now...and will this whole mess change the curse to allow Angelus free reign when we finally make it home?"

"To be honest, I don't know what will happen when we return." Wes shrugged apologetically. "As for here and now? I believe that the curse has been altered in someway to peel apart the slight merging between the soul and the demon. Oh, both of you still share a body and memories...but instead of weakening each other you are suddenly strengthening each other. The soul is what causes a reflection. We know that no unsouled demon species has a reflection...and now suddenly, despite Angelus' presence, your soul can create a reflection. And the change in appearance of your gameface is because Angelus is no longer...limited by the body he resides in."

Angel sighed and a haunted look entered his dark eyes. "So...I could be...stuck like this. Even after we get home?"

Wesley looked at him, sadness and sympathy welling in his eyes. "I don't know. It's a possibility. If it was caused by the portal...mostly likely it is a permanent change. If it is caused by being on Pylea then the change should revert back to normal when we reach Earth. I personally hope that the second is true. Even tied to your soul, Angelus has...gone insane. Most likely from being trapped inside of the same mind as a being who suffered from unspeakable grief and guilt. Human souls are designed to...feel those emotions and thus they can learn to cope with them. Vampires are not."

Just thinking about it made him tremble once more and he saw Cordelia flash a glare at Wes from the corner of his eye. "Look. With the exception of the whole reflection thing and an even more gruesome gameface, nothing has really changed. Right? You still have your soul and you still have a vampire demon floating around in there somewhere. We all knew that." He turned incredulous eyes on her, but the Seer merely shrugged. "We also all knew that Angelus was ugly. Inside *and* out. Now we have proof, so what? The important thing to remember is Angel...he's beautiful, just like he always was." She reached out and grabbed the silvered platter. Angel glanced up to once again see the reflection of his human face. "Beautiful...inside and out. No shock here."

And somehow that made him feel better. To know that even though Angelus was closer to the surface than ever, so was his soul. One was filled with power and strength, an animalistic need to dominate and devour. The other was intense, driven and filled with the human need to love and protect. And in his own mind everything suddenly came together. On Earth they were locked in a battle of wills for dominance and control of their shared body and mind. Here they were freed of that conflict, each equal, each separate beings that just happened to share a body and mind.

He was just about to comment on his revelation when the door to the Throne Room banged open and the Priests sauntered inside. With a sudden urge to protect those humans that were his, Angel jumped to his feet and growled low in his throat at the crimson robed demons. The High Priest with the strange tattoos decorating his face raised up one eyebrow, but said nothing at his display. Reaching behind himself with one hand, Angel gently pulled Cordelia to her feet and gave her a gentle shove in Gunn's direction. Then he stepped forward, placing himself between his humans and the demons. It was all done instinctively and the rational part of Angel's mind knew that it was Angelus' doing, but he couldn't help but agree. Protect those that were his...theirs.

"Princess?"

Cordelia stood next to Gunn and lifted her chin in a move that was supposed to be regal but came across as mere defiance. Almost absently, she straightened the clinging sheer veils that draped her body.

"Yes?"

The Priests all stood just a bit straighter, almost as if they were soldiers at attention. The High Priest's voice was formal as he spoke. "The Sacred Covenant of the Trombli has met to discuss your...claim of this offworlder demon as your mate. The Covenant has agreed to sanction this and officially support this...mating. However, you and your mate must still have the bond witnessed by the Covenant and nobility of Pylea. Once that is done you shall be elevated to the status of Queen."

A slow smile spread across all of their faces and Angel could smell the waves of relief pour off of Cordelia. She wouldn't be forced to mate with some strange random demon from this alien world.

"So...how exactly will this...witnessing be done?'

The Priest smiled but it wasn't exactly a reassuring expression. "Why, the ceremony will be held right here in your Highness' Throne Room. There is enough space for everyone to view the sacred event. I myself will bless the proceedings and then you and your mate will go up to the dais where your throne will have been replaced by your sacred marriage bed. There, your mate will...deflower you and claim you as his own for all to witness."

A cold shiver of fear raced down Angel's spine and he wanted to howl in frustration at the turn of events. He understood exactly what they wanted and it was the one thing he couldn't do. As much as both he and his demon would love to sink into Cordelia's hot living flesh and claim her as his mate, he couldn't or the curse would be broken and Angel would be lost forever.

"De...deflower?" Cordelia's voice held a tremor of fear and denial in it.

The Priest smirked at her with obvious glee. "Yes, deflower. Sex, your Highness. For all to witness. If you would rather not, then the Covenant shall chose a new mate for you and we will witness the bond of *that* union. It's your choice. You have three hours to decide. Then, we will hold the ceremony or send out word that the trials to find your mate shall begin."

"P...public sex? Th...three hours?" Cordelia never finished her thought; she was too busy falling sideways in a dead faint. With a grunt, Gunn caught her in his arms before she hit the floor.

With a chuckle, the High Priest turned his attention to Angel. "I suggest that you prepare her for what she must do. As...amusing as her keeling over like this is, it would be completely inappropriate for it to happen during the ceremony."

With that, the Priest swirled around in a flurry of crimson velvet and stalked out of the room with his lackeys beside him.

*****
Part 4:

Driving slowly and carefully through the streets of Sunnydale, Spike was painfully reminded of that long ago Halloween when Ethan Rayne cast his chaos spell on all of the townsfolk's costumes and he had allowed his dark princess to talk him into going out and about that night. Not since that night had he seen such panic and uncontrolled chaos reign rampant on the populous. Demons and humans alike swarmed through the streets pell-mell as they dashed from here to there. Only this time, there was no fainting southern-belle of a Slayer to inspire a heroic warrior Xander into defending her and the rest of the town from the Big Bad Monsters. No, this time Spike was huddled down behind a steering wheel praying to all the dark gods that they reached the dubious safety of the whelp's apartment while said human giggled and stared starry-eyed out the windows at the fleeing creatures surging through the night.

"Glowing blue mist. It stings, it stings. Burn, burn, burn. Glowing blue mist shall burn, burn, burn."

Spike turned his head to glance at Xander. The human's face was beaming with excitement and he was clapping his hands. Just then, the road they were on crossed the main thoroughfare of town. Further along that main street, Spike could clearly see a large crater had opened up in the middle of the asphalt and sure enough, a glowing blue mist wafted out of it. He watched, entranced, as a mortal stumbled along the street and into the blue mist. A strangled scream cut through the air as the human dashed out of the mist, his skin sizzling and bubbling the way a vampire's would if splashed with holy water. Xander merely bounced on his seat harder and shrieked with glee.

"Glowing blue mist burns and stings, burns and stings. See! See! Glowing blue mist."

Spike swallowed hard as he wondered what other surprises had appeared out of one of the Mystic Gates. "Yeah, pet. I see. Glowing blue mist that burns. Great, luv. You just keep a lookout for any other things like that, okay?"

He wasn't sure if Xander understood what he had asked, but Spike couldn't help but make the request. So far, every oddball thing from one of the Gates that they had come across, Xander had known about before it came into view. Handy ability, that.

Turning a corner, Spike aimed the car towards the building that housed Xander's apartment. It was difficult and slow going because of all of the creatures swarming the streets and because there were cars strewn about and fires burning in the middle of the road. Finally, just before the morning dawn, they reached their goal. It took a bit of work, but Spike was able to get Xander out of the car and all of the bags from the back seat loaded down in both of their arms. Then, with a lot of sweet talk he didn't really feel up to making and gentle shoves and pushes in the right direction, he got Xander to head inside and up the stairs.

Spike knew when he reached the correct door because the scent of Xander and Anya waffled out from behind it thickly. For a moment, he didn't know if he could handle staying in there where the memories of his dead friend and the man-child who was forever broken in the mind were so strong. Cursing himself for being such a big girl, but not being able to stop feeling as if walking in there would be pouring salt in his wounds; Spike dropped all of the bags he was carrying onto the floor. With a startled look and then a sly giggle, Xander dropped all of the stuff he was carrying as well.

Offering up a sad and shaky smile at the child-like man before him, Spike ran one hand down the side of Xander's face gently. Xander leaned into the touch and smiled innocently at him. "That's lovely, pet. But...do you have the keys to the door?" Xander just blinked and nuzzled against Spike's hand some more. A sob hitched in Spike's throat at the display of trust and affection by the one person of the Scooby Gang that had still feared and hated him as a Master Vampire despite his chipped state. "L...let's just check your pockets, okay luv? Maybe we'll find the keys in one of them, yeah?"

Trying to be gentle so as not to hurt or scare Xander, Spike dipped his hand into first one then the other coat pocket. No keys. With a grimace, he patted down the front pockets of his jeans. A solid clinking lump in one made him whoop with relief and excitement. "Yes! We found the keys, pet!" Trying not to hurt, Spike wiggled his fingers into the pocket to grasp hold of the keys. Xander moaned softly and leaned into the touch. Spike grinned wickedly at him. "Like that, pet? I always knew you were a horn-dog."

Once he had the keys, he quickly unlocked the door and flung it open. Then, he grabbed up a handful of the bags and tossed them inside. Scooping up more of their stuff, he repeated the action. Then, he carefully took Xander by the arm and walked towards the door. Xander went in easily enough, but Spike was stopped at the threshold by a mystic energy barrier. A spasm of dread and fear sizzled through him at the fact that he wasn't invited in.

"Xander? Luv? You need to invite me in. Vampire here, pet. You need to ask me to come in."

Xander turned at his voice, but his attention was completely focused on gazing around wide-eyed. His open face was filled with childish wonder and awe.

"Xander! Luv, please. Invite me in. Say it. Come in Spike. Come on, pet, say it."

Looking over at him, guileless brown eyes locked onto panicky blue ones. Xander held out his arms as if waiting for a hug, but it wasn't enough. He had to say it. "Call to me, pet. Call to me and tell me to come to you."

Xander's smile quirked slightly and he kept his arms open wide. "Shining blue which spins to gold. Blackened heart and arms so cold. Ancient demon, new born friend. To me, to me your path must wend."

And suddenly the shimmering barrier fell and Spike stumbled into the apartment. With a hop and a cry of glee, Xander dashed over to him and enveloped him in a tight hug. With a sigh of relief, Spike petted him gently on the head even as his other hand reached back and shut the door. "Shining blue which spins to gold?" With a soft shy smile, Xander's hand reached up to Spike's face and a single finger traced a warm path around his eyes, "Shining blue which spins to gold..." Certain that his unbeating heart was clenching in his cold chest, Spike offered up another shaky smile. "And I thought that I was the poet..."

Gently disengaging himself from the warm hug, Spike turned and took care to lock the door as tight as possible. It might not stop everything that was out wandering the streets, but it would stop some of them and that's all that mattered. Then, with a sigh, he began to go from room to room doing everything he could to cover the windows. It would be light soon and he didn't fancy the idea of bursting into flame from a stray sunbeam.

Once he had made the apartment as secure as he could, Spike took a moment to just lean back against the wall and closed his eyes. Daylight was coming and he was tired, so very tired. Unfortunately, he didn't want to stop moving because when he slowed down all he could do was think, to continuously reply the horrific events of the previous night. For a brief instant he almost envied Xander, his sanity had buckled and shattered under the weight of the destruction of his 'family' followed by his being 'cursed' with all of their talents by Glory. Now, the man-child didn't have enough sense to be filled with mind-bending grief and anger. He was just drifting along beside Spike, trapped inside his own head where nothing made sense and everything was either a source of wonder or incomprehensible terror. In a way, he reminded Spike of his dark princess.

Inhaling an unneeded breath so that he could sigh, Spike was hit with the stench of blood, charred flesh and gasoline. Flinching back, he realized that he couldn't escape this smell now that he was fully aware of it with no life and death threat to distract him. Looking down, he could see that he was covered in soot and gore and a quick glance at Xander proved that he was much the same way.

"Right then..." Pushing off of the wall, Spike began to head to the bathroom. "Let's find out if this place still has hot water, shall we? Don't think that the city ever planned for this type of apocalypse so all it will take is one of those Gates opening up inside a water main to throw the whole works to hell. Possibly even literally, yeah?" Curious, Xander followed him into the bathroom and immediately became enthralled with the mirror. Spike grinned sadly at him. "That is a neat trick, ducks. Sometimes wish I could play peek-a-boo with my reflection. Only problem with that is I don't have one." Xander ignored him in favor of trying to touch the man behind the glass and Spike turned and began to run water into the tub.

It didn't take Spike long to get a hot shower running and as soon as he did, he began to strip off his clothes. Halfway through, he heard a bang behind him and turned to find Xander trying to undress as well. Spike chuckled. "What'sa matter, pet? Having trouble getting your kit off?" Xander had his jeans down at his ankles and pulled partway over his heavy work boots where they got stuck. The mortal merely looked up at him with wide dark eyes that were so deep as to be unfathomable. A soft grin gentling the harsh edges of his face, Spike swiftly righted the man-child and stripped him down. Then, he helped him back onto his feet.

"Come on then, pet." One hand on Xander's back, he guided him into the tub and under the stream of warm water. With a cry of delight, the mortal turned his face up to the spray and let it run over his body. Spike's grin turned infinitely sad and his blue eyes were shadowed, haunted. He honestly didn't know if he had the strength to do this again. He had spent over a century trailing along behind his dark princess, catering to her every mad whim, holding her when the voices in her mind grew too loud, too persistent. And now, if what Glory had said was to be believed, then he would spend the rest of his unlife trapped by the side of this...child-like man whose mind had crumpled like a sheet of paper in a tight fist. Yes, he was honest enough with himself to admit that he always did like to be needed, to be the strong one, but it was so lonely and painful when you gave and gave and gave and never received anything in return.

Silently berating himself for getting maudlin again, Spike stepping into the shower as well. The next ten minutes were spent having a bit of soapy fun. Xander seemed to be fascinated with the slippery shampoo and the lathery bubbles it created. With his enthusiastic help, Spike's body, Xander's body, the shower walls and the inside of the tub was all washed down with a soapy sudsy washcloth while Spike tried not to snicker too obviously.

Finally, Spike managed to get them both rinsed off and back out of the shower. He quickly dried them off and then led Xander into the bedroom. Ransacking the closet and bureau, he was able to find two warm shirts and two pairs of socks and sweatpants. He dressed himself and turned around to find a naked Xander playing hand puppets with the socks, one sock per hand.

"Share a snack, my boy." Xander wiggled the sock on one hand. "Tasty Xander. Share a snack with soulboy." Turning his head, Xander wiggled the other sock covered hand. "My sire. You slayer bouffing undead liar guy. My sire, my Yoda!" Xander wiggled the first sock puppet again. "No! Share a tasty Xander snack, my childe. My Spike-boy."

A shock of memory swarmed through his mind as he recalled that long-ago day when Angel had tried to trick him in the old Sunnydale High School. Angel had dragged Xander in by the neck as bait and offered him to Spike as a snack, a way to reconcile. A peace offering. But it had been a lie. Angel still had his soul and he was working along with his, then lover, Buffy. A sad and wobbly smile on his face, Spike stepped closer and ran a gentle hand down Xander's face until he could hook a finger under the mortal's chin. Slowly, he tipped that innocent looking face up.

"You remember that day, pet? When we met in the old School?"

Xander smiled a childish smile and leaned into Spike's touch. Then he held up one sock and wiggled it. "Angelus! I haven't seen you in the killing fields for ages!" Spike couldn't help but laugh. Xander's British accent was horrible.

Shaking his head lightly, Spike pulled the socks off of Xander's hands. The mortal pouted at him and reached for them, but Spike pulled back a bit. "Now, now, pet. We need to get Angelus-sock puppet and Spike-sock puppet on your feet, now don't we? These two vampy socks will keep your tootsies all nice and cozy."

His pout fading away, Xander lifted up one foot and shoved it at Spike, his toes wiggling like mad. With another sad grin at how child-like this once fierce and proud human had become, Spike slipped the sock on the wiggling foot. Once Xander got the idea of the clothes being put on his body, things went a bit smoother and he stopped fighting Spike for them although it took three tries before he'd let Spike slip the shirt over his head without panicking.

Tired, hungry and emotionally worn thin, Spike led Xander back into the kitchen and began to raid the refrigerator. He found a packet of hotdogs and a jar of applesauce. Putting two of the dogs in the microwave, he scooped out a double spoonful of the applesauce onto a plate and then went back into the refrigerator for the gallon of milk he'd spied there. He poured a tall glass of the stuff and when the microwave dinged, he pulled out the hotdogs and cut them into round circles. He put the plate and the glass on the table in front of Xander and watched silently as the mortal dug into his food with zeal.

Seeing Xander eat led Spike to worry about something that he wasn't ready to think about; his own eating habits in combination to Xander's health. According to Glory, Xander was now his only source of food without mind shattering pain. The only problem with that is that Spike knew what happened to humans that were the exclusive food source of a vampire. They became anemic, pallid, tired, and sickly. He could only hope that whatever Glory did to the mortal also took that into account or they would both end up going through some tough times ahead. Spike glanced at the quick meal he'd thrown together for his human. He'd have to make sure that Xander stayed well fed and with a lot more nutritious food than was available here in the apartment. Not that he knew very much about what was considered healthy eating for a human, but he'd have to learn.

Suddenly, Spike was pulled out of his musings when Xander picked up his now empty plate and threw it Frisbee style at the wall. With a great crash, it shattered into a hundred pieces of ceramic that rained down all over the linoleum floor. Startled, he leapt from his chair and turned to the crash with a snarl, his gameface coming to the fore. He turned back to see Xander sitting there, bouncing in his chair and clapping his hands.

"Crashed and smashed. It all tinkled down like falling stars. Crash and smash. Crash and smash. Stars fall down."

Rolling his golden eyes in relief and berating himself for being so jumpy even though he knew that it was a reasonable response to the horrific events that he'd just barely managed to survive, Spike reached out with one hand to Xander. "Come here, pet. Time for Spike to feed." Xander stood up and slid easily into Spike's arms. Holding the mortal gently, he nuzzled at Xander's neck, the warm spicy scent of his hot living blood filling Spike's senses. Cooing, Xander tilted his head back and ran blood warm fingertips along Spike's ribcage. "You know, don't you luv? Somehow, you know what I need. Won't hurt you, pet. Never hurt you."

With those soft words whispered into the shell of Xander's ear, Spike let his fangs scrape gently along the mortal's neck. Xander neither whimpered in fear nor pulled away in disgust, instead, his warm hands gripped tightly to his sides with the slayer-strength that was only a part of his curse. Glad that he wasn't frightening the boy, Spike slid his fangs into the silky warm skin under his lips. Liquid sunshine that carried the tantalizing scent which had been teasing his nose only seconds ago started to flood into his watering mouth. A jolt of raw unadulterated pleasure slammed into him as the taste of living human blood that was sprinkled liberally with magic both light and dark rolled over his tongue.

The taste, that wonderful and amazing taste, so potent and vibrant that it practically sang as it slid down his throat and into his stomach burned with the heat of the sun. Unable to stop himself, Spike moaned at the exquisite pleasure that had been denied to him for so very long. Warm tingles erupted in his belly as the blood began to fill him up and then spread out along his limbs bringing life and strength and power with it. Pleasure swam through his mind and he felt dizzy and light. A deep part of his swirling mind absently noted that the taste of Xander's blood was changing, becoming spicier, darker with arousal. Before he could do anything about it, however, the mortal growled in his ear and began to shake and shudder in his arms. With a low throaty moan, Spike swallowed down one last mouthful of the bright living blood and then exploded into a powerful and totally unexpected orgasm.

Shaking with tremors, it was all Spike could do to support his mortal while they both slid down to the floor when both of their knees gave out. Panting and licking his lips, he looked over to see a pale and sweaty Xander huddled in his arms, a wet patch on his pants and the thick smell of semen hovering in the air around him. Grimacing slightly, Spike tried not to feel the cold seed currently smearing inside of his own clothing. Running a trembling hand gently through Xander's dark curls, Spike tried to pull his body back under control.

"Well, pet. I have to confess, if I had known that was going to happen, I'd have made us both eat before we showered." Xander just hummed a sleepy reply and snuggled deeper into Spike's arms.

*****
tbc...part V