"We *promise* we'll bring some back for you." Buffy looked earnestly at Spike. Which would have been enough to make her sick, if the chance of chocolate weren't looming happily on the horizon.

Spike scowled. "I don't think I trust you."

"Spike, come on. If we could get the blanket, we would. But it's up front, and Tara will see us. You wait here and we will be *right* back."

Spike kept scowling. Xander looked cute -- just a little. Spike growled. "Fine. But I want dark chocolate!"

"Absolutely!" Xander said even as he was grabbing Buffy's hand and dragging her towards the door. There wasn't much dragging, because she was as determined as he was.

Out on the sidewalk, Buffy looked both ways, and pointed. "There. Cafe Borgia has ice cream treats, and cookies, and double choco-fudge mochaccinos."

"I don't think they'll give us mochaccinos, Buff."

"You haven't seen *me* look cute yet."

"Yeah, actually, I have. But I don't think the whole looking cute thing will work when it comes to handing out grown-up beverages to four-year-olds."

"Wanna bet?"

"Nope. Want chocolate. Come on, let's try it."

Buffy looked at him. Xander shook his head. "Nope. Gotta make your eyes go wide. Wider. Wider -- yeah! That'll do it." He grinned, then his expression instantly turned into the most pathetic, starving, kick me I'm nobody can I have a piece of chocolate, Buffy had ever seen.

"Wow, you're good at that. How'd you learn how to do it so good?"

Xander shrugged, but his face looked shadowed. "Come on. Let's go tell 'em we're lost and hungry." He headed towards the Cafe Borgia.

"You know, we could have borrowed money from the Magic Box till," Buffy pointed out as they walked down the sidewalk.

"Where's the fun in that?"

She giggled.

Luckily for them, the door was propped open to let in the spring breeze, because the heavy glass would have been too much for a normal four-year-old to move. Buffy, of course, would have had no trouble, but it wouldn't make them look very hungry or pitiful for her to start showing off her superpowers.

Soon they were standing in front of the counter -- which was too tall for them to see over the top of. It didn't deter them in the slightest. Buffy went up on her tiptoes, trying to peer over the counter. Xander walked around her towards the ice cream, which he could almost see into, if he stood on *his* tiptoes.

They both looked hungry, but just a little bit sad.

"Can I help you?" the cashier leaned forward, giving Buffy a cheerful smile even as she spoke in a over-done condescending tone.

Buffy jutted out her chin, and slowly shook her head.

"Look," Xander said in a tone of awe. "They have chocolate." He carefully did not read the label that said 'Super Chocolate Double Fudge Marshmallow Ripple.'

"Umm... chocolate? Ice cweem?" Buffy moved over next to him, and he gave her a quick look, which let her know that yeah, the lisp was a nice touch, but don't overdo it. She nodded. Check. Got it.

"Uh-huh," Xander said sincerely, pointing.

Buffy looked, and she made her eyes get even bigger if that was possible. "Oh." They both stood there, not quite looking the cashier in the eye. Just staring at the thick brown ice cream with the dark fudgy stripes and the white marshmallowy stripes running through it.

The cashier followed them over to the ice cream part of the counter.

"We have some little cones just your size," she half-teased, half-sales-pitched, "or you could share a big one, if you two can convince your mom that you wouldn't fight over it."

Xander and Buffy looked at each other, then slowly looked back at the cashier. "That's OK," Xander began. "We were just looking."

"Xan," Buffy began in a little girl's tired, make it better for me tone, "I'm hungry."

Xander took her hand. "I know. But Mommy will be back soon. We'll have breakfast then." Buffy gave the ice-cream an extra wide-eyed look of longing, and Xander tugged her hand gently.

"Come on, Mommy told us to wait in the alley for her."

"But I'm hungry!" Buffy said again.

"Your mother told you to wait in the alley?" the cashier asked, frowning slightly.

Xander gave the cashier his best brave little boy look. Buffy whined, very quietly as if only for Xander to hear, "I want ice cream."

"Honey, how long have you been outside in the alley?" the woman asked, concern spreading across her face.

Buffy shrugged. Xander looked up earnestly and said "Dunno. A little while."

Buffy shook her head. "A long, long, time. I didn't eat in forever."

A little tap on her shoulder where the cashier couldn't see -- don't ham it up too much, Buff. Check, got that too.

"I think you two should sit down for a minute," the cashier said, coming around the counter. "There's some nice kid-sized seats right here." She pointed to a mini-table with matching sweetheart-type soda fountain chairs. Xander shook his head.

"No, thank you. We should really go back and wait."

Buffy pulled on his hand, and said to him in a stage-whisper, "But I want ice cream!"

"We don't have any money," Xander told her, patiently. "Mommy will buy us some when she gets back this time. I bet she will."

He took a step towards the door, and Buffy gave the ice cream counter a devastating look of disappointment.

The cashier crouched down beside them, putting her arms around them, and giving them a blatantly forced smile. "How about if I give you two an ice cream cone each, while you wait?"

Buffy squealed, "Yea! I want chocolate!" Xander, however, looked doubtful. Buffy turned on him. "Please? Please, I want some ice cream!"

"It's all right, dear, your mommy will be able to find you here," the cashier said.

Xander gave a slow nod, and put his arm around Buffy, pulling her toward the table. 'Nice touch' she mouthed.

Soon they were each gleefully licking at their own adult-size ice cream cone. Buffy had a chocolate smear on her nose, and Xander was doing his best to lick all the way around his ice-cream before one side or the other dripped down the cone.

"So... how exactly are we supposed to get chocolate for Spike?" Buffy asked under her breath. "Tell her we left our baby brother sitting out in the alley, and could we please have some for him too?" If only getting rid of Spike were as easy as abandoning him in an alley...

"I'm still working on it," Xander said, equally quietly. "Maybe just say we have to go back and wait, and maybe can we have a candy bar to take with us?"

Buffy frowned. "I don't think he'll be satisfied with just a candy bar."

Xander glanced at his ice cream cone. "I suppose I could *share*--"

"Buffy! Xander! What are you two doing?" They'd never heard Tara shout, before. Hadn't known she had it in her. Nor did they known she had it in her to look quite so furious.

"Eep?" Buffy replied.

"Nuthin' ?" Xander tried valiantly. Possibly the chocolate smeared all over his own face made that statement seem a little farfetched, but Buffy had to give him points for effort.

"You couldn't wait an *hour* ? I was gonna bring you guys over here anyway."

The cashier came out from behind the counter again, looking at Tara like she was something extra-icky that you would have to get a newspaper just to scrape off the bottom of your shoe.

"Excuse me," she said very icily. "Are you their mother?"

Tara blinked. "Their what? No, I'm babysitting." She glanced at Xander and Buffy, and her expression changed into one they'd seen a lot in the last four days. "What did they do?"

The cashier seemed a bit off-balance, as she said, "They said...their mother left them in the alley. They hadn't had any breakfast and they--"

"Wanted ice cream?" Tara finished, nodding. "I'm so sorry. Let me pay you for those cones." She gave Xander and Buffy another sharp look as she pulled out her wallet.

Xander started easing out of his chair.

"You mean...they aren't...?" The cashier seemed confused, now, though she accepted the money Tara was handing her. Buffy began to eat her ice cream as fast as she could.

Xander had made it out of his chair, and began ever so slowly easing towards the door.

"Don't even think about it, Alexander." Tara said it without even looking back at him.

"I fear her," Xander whispered to Buffy, who was too busy licking her ice cream to do more than nod.

Suddenly Tara was standing in front of them. "Hands, please. Not the ones with the ice cream cones."

They glanced at each other. At least they hadn't lost the cones. Yet. Each of them held out a hand, and Tara began to lead them out of the shop.

"How'd you find us, anyway?" Xander asked. Good idea. They needed to know where they'd gone wrong, for next time.

"Spike. He got bored and told me you weren't really bringing him any ice cream." She stopped, and looked down at them, and their cones. She glanced back at the counter. "I can't get three more cones *and* make sure you two stay out of trouble on the way back to the store."

Xander looked as offended as Buffy felt. "We won't get into trouble!" she protested indignantly. Tara gave her a look. Buffy wilted, a little. "Anymore. This morning."

Tara sighed, and dragged them back towards the counter. "You two are going to have to carry Spike and Giles' ice cream. If you drop one -- they get what's left."

"Eew! I don't want Spike eating my ice cream. I might get reverse Spike-germs!" Buffy wrinkled her nose.

Xander frowned as Tara rolled her eyes and paid for three more cones. "Don't you mean he'd get Buffy germs?"

She sniffed. "I don't have germs. Besides the regular ones. He's the one with vampie-cooties." That last said low enough so that no one else in the store could hear it. Hopefully.

"I always thought he had to bite you. Didn't know you got it from cooties," Xander grinned.

"You should learn more -- do more research," Buffy said with a superior air. Xander stuck his tongue out at her.

"All right," Tara interrupted them. "Each of you take one of these." She handed Xander another chocolate fudge marshmallow ripple cone, and handed Buffy a pistachio cone.

Buffy wrinkled her nose. "Eew. I am *so* not dropping my cone."

"As long as no one trips you," Xander taunted. Buffy gave him a killing glare, to which Xander once again stuck out his tongue.

Tara sighed.

The cashier said, "I can understand why you might have left them in an alley."

Tara glared at Xander and Buffy again. "Yes, and we're going to have a *talk* about that when we get back to the shop." Turning to the woman again, she smiled politely. "Thank you for putting up with them. If you ever need any hensbane or bladderwort.. or.. um... a tarot reading, feel free to stop into the Magic Box, and I'll fix you up."

"Anya would be so proud," Xander said.

That got him another glare and Buffy whispered, "What do you think she meant by a *talk* ? Like one of those, "Now Buffy, you really shouldn't do things like that without consulting me,' lectures from Giles? Or one of the 'Giles thinks I almost got myself killed and now he's gonna finish the job' ones ?"

Xander gulped silently. "Hoping for number one, betting on number two."

"Maybe she means something else entirely," Tara said from behind them. Buffy and Xander looked up, startled, and Xander had to quickly move his hand to avoid dumping Spike's cone on the floor.

Cowed, and trying to figure out what she *did* mean, Xander and Buffy headed out towards the Magic Box. Every time either glanced back, Tara was right there, enjoying her ice cream and giving them a 'wait til I get you back to the shop' look.

When Tara opened the door for them, Xander preceded Buffy inside -- and was instantly beset by a tiny, excited vampire. "Chocolate! Mine!"

"No, I think the pistachio is yours, Spike," Buffy teased. Which earned her a fang-faced glare, then a chocolate-covered tongue stuck out in her direction, since Spike had already snatched the cone out of Xander's hand.

"The pistachio is mine, actually," Giles said from his spot perched on top of one of the counters. "And don't you *dare* drop it."

Buffy mimicked him as she walked over. "Don't you *dare drop it.... Bossy, bossy, bossy."

"I *am* your Watcher. It's my job to boss you around."

Buffy stopped, halfway across to the counter. Held up the ice cream. "Say that again?"

Giles jumped down and started towards her. Buffy waved her hand a bit, making the ice cream sway.

"Remember what I said about sharing?" Tara reminded her.

"But he doesn't like chocolate fudge marshmallow ripple," Buffy replied.

Giles got closer, and Buffy took a step back. Tara walked up behind Buffy. When Buffy grinned up at her, unrepentant, Tara said sadly, "I can't believe you'd be so mean to him."

Buffy huffed once, rolled her eyes, didn't *quite* stamp her foot, and handed the cone over to Giles. Who took a lick, and a look of indescribable joy came over his face for a few seconds. Then he looked at Buffy, grinned smugly, and said, "Told you."

Buffy narrowed her eyes and pressed her lips together. For about half a second, then she opened her mouth. "You did *not* boss me around. Tara just appealed to my better nature."

"You haven't got one," Spike said with a mouthful of ice cream.

Buffy was about ready to hurl something at the vampire -- when she realized the only thing she had handy to throw was her ice cream cone. She gave Spike a dirty look, and went back to eating her ice cream.

Tara looked at them all, then shook her head. "If I had known having your hands full of ice cream would make you behave, I would have bought some yesterday."

"That was Spike's fault!" Buffy shouted.

"Was not!" Spike countered.

Buffy paused for a lick of her cone. Then, "Was!"

Spike swallowed a mouthful of his own ice cream, then said, "Was not!"

Neither of them made any move to strike the other, as they normally would have done. Tara smiled.

"Now. About sneaking out of the shop by yourselves, without telling anybody where you were going..." she began.

"We did too," Xander protested. "We told Spike!"

"Xander, you're not helping," Buffy said.

"Hey, I'm somebody!" Spike piped up.

Xander shot him a glance full of sunshine-- vampire-burning sunshine. "Yeah, somebody who was supposed to keep his big fangy mouth shut."

"If Spike hadn't told me where you were, I'd have been looking up and down the street for you, convinced you'd been kidnapped, or run over, or dragged away by trolls." She held up one hand to cut off twin protests from the two sneakaways. "Please don't tell me you're adults in kids' bodies again. First of all, you're at about half your usual strength, Buffy. If something big had run up and chomped on Xander, do you think you could have beat it up in time?"

"Yes," Buffy immediately. But she glanced guiltily at Xander. "Of course I would have," she said, but she knew she was trying to convince herself.

"Secondly, if you were being responsible, you would have come and told me you were going. I would even have given you money for the ice cream."

"But our way was so much more fun." Xander grinned, then wiped it from his face when Tara frowned at him.

"Yeah, I was only worried about your welfare," Spike put in. He looked sincere, even as he took another lick of his ice cream. Amazingly, he didn't have any chocolate on his face. Xander grumbled quietly that it was probably another evil, vampiric super power.

"You were worried we weren't going to bring you back any chocolate," Xander corrected him.

"Would you do that to me?" Spike pouted.

"As a matter of fact, no. We were just trying to think of a way to get some for you when we got...um...rescued."

"Oh." Spike went straight from pouting to happy, with no detour to 'guilty' on the way.

"And speaking of welfare," Tara really frowned this time. "Did you not get that that woman was about to call social services on me? Or whoever your imaginary evil mom who left you in the alley was. What if I *hadn't* got there in time, and we'd had to try to explain this to the police, instead of just one cashier?"

Buffy and Xander looked at each other. "Um..."

"If you want us to remember that you're adults in there, you should really try to act like adults. Not four-year-olds." Tara walked away from them, moving to sit at the table near the books. Giles went over to join her, looking smug. Buffy noticed that the green smear of pistachio on his cheek didn't help.

Xander, Buffy, and Spike looked at one another. They kept licking their ice cream, but Buffy found that she wasn't really hungry for it anymore.

"So," Xander said after another moment of silent reflection. "I guess we should behave ourselves?"

Spike and Buffy looked back at him. They all grinned, and mouthed 'nah.'

****************

"I want the one with the Pelican head!" Buffy and Xander were racing for the boingy spring animals, while Spike stood back and laughed.

"Those things don't even *go* anywhere!"

The diminutive vampire was climbing up the 12 foot slide -- the slide, not the steps -- by the time his cohorts had decided that the one with the Pelican head looked kind of evil, and they were going to play on the swings instead.

"Could you explain to me again how this is 'training' ?" Giles asked Willow as they sat on the park bench.

Willow smiled and held her finger up to her lips. "It's really a time honoured technique of child-rearing. Called 'tire them out so they fall asleep when they're supposed to'."

"Ah." Giles nodded, and turned to face the playground, watching as Xander and Buffy started competing to see who could swing higher. Spike was still slipping more than he was climbing, on the slide.

"Um, you know you could go...." Willow began. "Um, if you wanted to."

Giles shook his head, though he didn't break his gaze. "That's all right. I don't need to be tired out before bed."

"Yeah, but, Giles," Willow leaned over, gesturing at the playground equipment. "How often do you get a chance like this? To play on stuff that you're the right size to play on?"

He shook his head. "I don't need to play, either, Willow. I know that Buffy and Xander enjoy it because you're not that far out of childhood yourselves, all of you. And Spike... is Spike. We should be grateful he's merely attacking defenseless playground equipment."

Willow blew bangs out of her face, as if this were an argument they'd had several times -- which it was. "It's not like it'll break your dignity as an apparent four-year-old to be seen playing in a park. In fact, you look a little weird just sitting here watching." She gave him a stern eye. "And no Watcher jokes, please."

"Willow, it's dark -- no one is out here, but us."

"Well, what if someone comes by? They'll think you're being punished, and they'll look cross at me and say how cruel, letting the others play and keeping him over here, what could he possibly have done--' " She broke off as Giles climbed off the bench.

"All right, fine," he muttered. "I shall go...er...." He looked around the playground. "I shall go sit on those bars, is that all right?"

"I think you'd like the tire swing, better," she said brightly.

Giles glared at her, but turned without saying anything. Willow watched as he went over to the monkey bars, and climbed up to sit on one.

"They'll look cross at you?" Dawn repeated with a giggle as she leaned over the bench from behind Willow.

"Giles-speak. Hey, it worked, didn't it?"

"You do realize that you and Tara are *way* too good at this stuff?"

Willow blinked. "Well, in my case, I've babysat for years. *You*, for instance." Dawn gave her a small smile, and Willow ducked her head. "Well, I *remember* babysitting for you. Granted, you weren't four, you were nine. But the principle is still the same. You just required more ice cream."

"I think they're going to require a *lot* more ice cream, if it keeps preventing them from trashing the house while they're eating it."

"I have to keep telling myself it's OK to constantly give them ice cream...until they're sick and pass out. Which also keeps them out of trouble." Willow smiled.

She glanced over at Buffy and Xander, who were still trying to reach orbit on the swings. Spike was sliding down the slide on his stomach, though whether it was intentional or not, she didn't know. When he reached the ground, he jumped up and ran over to the swings and grabbed the one on the other side of Xander.

Giles was still watching, sitting on the bar, swinging his legs.

"Okay, at least I got him off the bench, so he *looks* like he's playing," Willow said.

"Think I should go bug him?" Dawn asked, staring across at Giles as well.

Willow shook her head. "Nah. He'll just go all 'I'm Super Stuffyman in my four-year-old secret identity' on you. Let him do what he wants." She glanced back at Dawn. "Of course, *you* could go play..."

"Race you to the merry-go-round?"

The two girls jumped up, and raced towards the merry-go-round. They reached it at the same time, jumping on and yelling out, "You have to spin it!" They looked at each other and began laughing.

A moment later, Xander was climbing onto the merry-go-round with them. "Who's spinning it? Don't look at me, I'm only four."

"Here, I will - the first time," Willow said, giving Dawn a look. Dawn beamed, and sat in the center. Xander crawled to one of the bars along the edge and grabbed on.

"Let'er rip!" he cried out.

"Xander, if you fall off-"

"I'll regret it in the morning. I know! I know! I'm hanging on."

Willow gave it a good running push, then climbed on. Soon the artificial wind was blowing her hair all over the place, and Xander was shouting "Cowabunga!" Dawn of course, sat in the middle like a Buddha, pretending she wasn't getting completely sick to her stomach.

Spike and Buffy were looking at each other with evil grins. At least from what Willow could tell every time her section of the merry-go-round strobed around to let her see the swingset. It was kind of frightening, how similar they looked, for two people who were supposed to be mortal enemies.

Her eyes narrowed as it clicked in her head exactly what they were planning. "Don't you...." They had jumped off their swings at the highest point of the arc before she even got the word 'dare' out. Tucked, rolled, and come up in a puff of grass and dust right at the foot of the monkey bars. "I suppose I'd be wasting my breath to point out that you could've busted your heads open?"

Spike and Buffy ignored her, no doubt pretending they were too far away to have heard her. She could hear them clearly, of course, as they went up to either side of Giles.

"I bet he's just here because he's afraid of heights," Spike said, climbing onto the lowest bar.

"He isn't," Buffy retorted. "He just probably *can't* climb higher." She climbed up to the second lowest bar.

Spike climbed up after her, neither of them looking down when Giles said, "I most certainly could if I wanted to."

"Whatever," Buffy said, climbing still higher.

"Oh, for... I could. It's not as if I'm a..."

"Great big scaredy cat?" Spike supplied as he passed Buffy and reached for the top rung.

"Vampire with a mouth that's bigger than his ability to back it up..." Giles responded, and started to climb.

"Tweed-for-brains!" Spike called down.

Giles said something they couldn't hear from the merry-go-round, but Spike laughed. Giles climbed up, quickly reaching the top. "Now who's--" He stopped, as Spike and Buffy were already climbing down the other side. "Where are you going?" he yelled after them, and began climbing down.

Spike and Buffy reached the bottom, waiting there until Giles was almost upon them. Then they ran for the tornado slide.

Buffy ran up the steps properly, Giles close behind. Spike, of course, had to do things the backwards way. He was halfway up the corkscrew slide when Buffy yelled 'Look out below!" and she and Giles both came shooting down at him. The three of them landed in a tangle of arms and legs at the foot of the slide.

A sandy-haired, grin-covered head popped up from the mess. "Can we do that again?"

"Yeah, but this time *you* get to be the one that gets slammed into!" Spike replied.

"No, I think it should be Buffy," Giles countered. "Let's see if she's really strong enough to catch us."

Buffy, who had been about to protest, took this as a challenge. "Oh, I am! I'll show you." She went to the bottom of the slide. When Spike and Giles had climbed the stairs, she called up, "Ready?"

Spike made shushing motions to Buffy. "In a moment!" Then Spike and Giles hurled themselves down the slide.

Willow put her head in her hands.

She wasn't precognitive, really. So why did she know with a sort of doomed certainty , what was going to happen? She peeked, and sure enough, as soon as Spike and Giles got past the point where they could remotely slow themselves down, Buffy stepped aside. "Oops!" she said as the two boys hurtled off the slide and rolled into another heap, this time quite a bit further away from the foot of the slide. "Guess you're right -- I'm not strong enough to catch you."

She giggled as Spike and Giles exchanged a glance. "Get her!"

Buffy screamed and ran away, Spike and Giles on her heels. At first.

The diminutive Slayer was still faster than normal mortals, and though Spike was faster than Giles, Buffy soon left them both behind.

Spike kept after her, but Giles came to a stop near the merry-go-round. Xander held out a hand, and Giles climbed on. "Willow, spin us again!" Xander told her.

"Wait, let me get off... uh, I think I should go after Spike and Buffy," Dawn said, looking green and woozy.

"Only if they're heading to the bathroom," Willow said with a not-unkind laugh. "You shouldn't have eaten quite so much ice cream yourself, tonight."

"Bleagh," Dawn replied, climbing unsteadily to her feet and stepping off the merry-go-round.

"Ready?' Willow asked as soon as Dawn was clear. Xander nodded; Giles just rolled his eyes.

Xander elbowed him. "Hang on-- she pushes fast."

Willow grinned, and gave the ride another spin.

*****
Part 6:

"All right, who wants a burger?" Dawn held up a plate and walked over to the table. Six cries of 'me! me!' drowned out anything else she could have said. She set the plate down beside Willow, and returned to the kitchen. When she came out this time, she asked, "Who wants green veggies?" No one said anything. Dawn grinned. "Good, because I don't have any. Potato salad, though...."

Again, six cries of 'me' drowned her out.

As they passed the food around the table, there was a certain amount of bouncing in chairs. Probably because they all knew there was strawberry shortcake with ice cream and whipped cream for dessert. Willow and Tara weren't above bouncing in seats for strawberry shortcake, either.

"Hey -- Spike's stealing fries from me!" This from Buffy, who gave the vampire on her left a slight push on the shoulder.

"Was not. Like I'd want to eat anything you touched," Spike shot back. Then he popped a ketchup-laden fry into his mouth. Dawn glanced at his plate. Yep. *His* pile of french fries was covered with mustard.

Buffy apparently noticed, as well. She grabbed the ketchup bottle, and squirted some all over Spike's french fries.

"Hey! What was that for?"

She reached over and took one of the now-ketchuped fries, and ate it.

"Children, behave," Willow said in a calm tone.

"Stop kicking my chair."

"I'm not kicking your chair."

"Are too."

"Stop it!"

Willow looked over. "Xander, Giles, am I going to have to make you stand in the corners?" She was smiling, a little. Dawn thought it was probably because Giles had given in and played with the others for a couple hours, that afternoon. Still was, if you considered annoying each other 'play'.

Since it was raining, the park wasn't an option, so they'd all had to stay indoors during the day today, not just Spike. Giles had quietly wandered over and helped Xander build a Lego castle that still stood on the coffee table. Admittedly, a bit trashed, since Spike's horde of vampire G.I. Joes had attacked it soon after it was built.

Of course, the whole kid thing could be taken too far. Like for instance the fact that Giles and Xander *still* hadn't stopped kicking each other's chairs.

"Um, guys?" Dawn tapped Xander on the shoulder. One more kick, then Xander looked up with an inquisitive expression. "Don't you think you should act like grown-ups, now, and eat before your food gets cold?"

"That's what microwaves are for," Xander said, and gave Giles' chair another strong kick that made the chair wobble.

"Stop it!" Giles shouted, and began to kick back. Dawn pulled Giles' chair back out of the way.

"I think this 'acting like a kid' thing can take a rest, don't you?" Dawn leaned down between them. Xander and Giles looked at her, then looked at each other.

"I will if he will," from both of them.

"Excuse me?" She looked back and forth between the two of them. They looked perfectly serious, and perfectly willing to continue irritating each other all night.

"Well, he started it," Giles accused.

"I did not! You kicked my chair when you sat down."

"That was an accident!"

Dawn looked down at the other end of the table. "Willow?"

"Hey, Giles, Xan, cut it out for a while, huh?" Willow said gently.

"He's annoying me!" Xander complained, then stuck his tongue out at Spike when the vampire said 'right on, mate!'

"Guys, come on, this isn't fun anymore." Willow sighed, looking a little tired. Tara glanced her way, then squeezed her hand gently.

"*I'm* having fun," Spike remarked.

Buffy whapped him on the arm. Spike started to whap her back. "Not you as well! Please, guys. You're adults. Act like it." Willow's voice snapped, just a little, at the end.

"I will if she will," Spike said with a smirk. Buffy picked up her fork, loaded with potato salad, and aimed it for Spike.

"Stop it!" Willow yelled, standing up so fast her chair nearly tipped over. Everyone's eyes were on her, as she glared at each of the four-year-olds. "If you want to act like kids, then you'll be treated like kids! The next person who misbehaves is getting sent to bed this instant!"

There was silence around the table as four people who should supposedly know better looked at each other, then back at Willow with big, somewhat startled eyes.

"Er...sorry. Don't know what came over me," Giles said quietly. He really looked like he didn't, too. A bit confused and fuzzy.

"I'm not." From Spike, who grinned. "But I'm not gettin' sent to bed before strawberry shortcake."

Buffy rolled her eyes. "You know, if I'd known all I had to do to make evil vampires be good was give them dessert, I could've retired to Miami Beach by now."

"I'm not good. I'm just temporarily well-behaved," Spike protested.

"You will be *good*," Willow reiterated as she sat back down. "Or no dessert for a *month*."

Dawn refrained from pointing out that they wouldn't be kids for a month, when she saw how well it seemed to have worked: Spike opened his mouth -- then stopped, and shut it. He went back to eating his french fries. He glanced at Buffy's plate, then his own. Then he looked timidly up at Willow. "Do I have to give her back the fries I didn't take but might have rescued from falling off her plate?"

Willow just glared at him.

"Right. Here." Spike dumped a handful of fries on Buffy's plate.

"I knew you took them!" Buffy began. Then she shot a guilty look towards Willow, and went back to her dinner, as well.

The grown-ups all looked at Xander, who had been sitting quietly throughout. Xander just looked back. Not a grin, not a smile, not an eep-face, either. Utterly blank expression.

At least they didn't have to yell at *him,* too. Heaving a sigh of more than just relief -- it was exhausting, taking care of four not-really-four-year-olds -- Dawn turned her attention to her own plate. She had bitten halfway into her burger, and was just starting to come to the conclusion that Willow was a better cook than she had realized, when they all heard the little thud.

Followed by another.

Dawn looked up at Willow, who was scanning up and down the table. Every not-kid seemed to be firmly entrenched in ploughing through his or her dinner.

Willow looked around at each face more intently, before settling on the one who had been the most quietly unimpressed by Willow's earlier outburst. She turned her attention towards him, and waited until he looked up at her.

"Xander? Would you like a bedtime story tonight?"

Xander's innocent blank expression turned into one of excitement -- then almost as quickly into suspicion. "Yes?"

"Then stop kicking Giles' chair."

Xander glanced down, obviously weighing the benefits of chair-kicking and Giles-annoying, with getting a story from Willow. "How long of a story?" he finally asked.

**********************

Willow came down the stairs slowly, to join Tara and Dawn on the couch. "Well. That was..."

"Exhausting?" Tara supplied.

"How about freaky?" Dawn leaned her head on her arm and rubbed at her neck with her other hand. "I mean, I know Buffy's always lived to annoy me in her own I'm-older-and-I-know-what's-right way, but this is the first time I've ever felt like *I* was the big sister. For real." She stretched her neck back and forth and grimaced. "Exhausting works too, though."

"Yeah, it was like... they forgot, or something. That they weren't really kids." Willow shook her head in wonder. "Maybe it's because everyone treats them like kids. It's a subconscious reaction to being what everyone expects you to be."

"But when we try treating them like adults, they act like kids. Especially Xander and Spike," Tara said.

"Well, Xander and Spike *always* act like kids. I think it's a guy thing," Willow replied.

"I think it's a Xander and Spike thing," Dawn said.

"Hopefully they'll be themselves in the morning. I don't think I can take this much longer." Willow began rubbing her neck. Tara scooted away on the couch, a little, and turned so she could reach Willow's shoulders. As she began rubbing, Willow moaned. "Oo, I'm keeping you."

"It's only another week," Tara said quietly. "They really aren't that bad. Just...exhausting."

Dawn gave her a grin. "I bet you're gonna end up with four kids of your own, aren't you?"

Tara smiled, shyly. Willow glared at her. "Don't even think it. Not unless the oldest one is old enough to take care of the rest of them!"

"Well, hopefully not quadruplets," Tara agreed. "And no vampires."

"Ye Gods, I hope not. Then we'd have at least one permanent four-year-old."

"So we're back to talking about Spike?" Dawn laughed.

"Well, he *was* the loudest." They all grinned, though at the time -- fifteen minutes ago -- it hadn't been funny. Though they'd been more or less well-behaved throughout and after dinner, once they'd started yawning the threat of no-dessert and early bed didn't hold.

There had been whining, and pouting, and stomping about, before Willow, Tara, and Dawn had simply carried the smaller ones upstairs. Spike had shouted his head off that he was being murdered. Five minutes after Willow had plonked him down on the bed and held him there, his eyes had closed.

"Is there anything *really* morally wrong with putting Nyquil in their milk?" Dawn questioned.

Willow nodded. "I think there's a line between letting them eat themselves sick on sugar because they'll be adults next week, and actually drugging them."

Dawn shrugged. "Never hurts to ask." She glanced at the television. "You think it's safe to turn that thing on, or will it wake 'em up?"

"We can keep the volume down low," Willow said. Dawn nodded and picked up the remote, and started channel surfing.

She'd barely settled on a show, when they all head a footfall on the stairs. When they looked up, they saw Xander standing there, looking hesitant.

"Xander," Willow sighed. "Why are you awake? Never mind," she said without giving him the chance to respond.

Xander took another step towards them, and they could see there was something upsetting him. Willow was off the couch and over at his side before anyone could ask what was wrong. She knelt down in front of him, with him on the last step her head was below his. "Xander? What is it?"

"I'm scared."

Willow raised an eyebrow at him. "Really? Well, I'll have to come back upstairs with you and make sure there's no scary Spike-monsters in your bed or anything." She leaned down, and Xander reached his arms up to be lifted. Over his shoulder, Willow mouthed, "Pity-cuddles..." at the other girls, who smiled. She carried him up the stairs, whispering to him, "We'll just make sure the Big Bad doesn't hog all the bed-space, okay?"

Xander murmured something sleepily, and leaned his head against her shoulder.

She took him back to the bedroom, and tiptoed in so as not to wake the others. Giles was curled up on his side, facing away from the center of the bed where Xander had been. Spike was sprawled out across the entire other half of the bed, seemingly oblivious to everything. When Willow leaned over to put Xander back in the bed, he reached out and pulled Xander towards him and snuggled.

Willow watched as Spike wrapped one arm and one leg around and over Xander, glomming onto him as if to prevent him from escaping, again. Willow grinned and pulled the blankets back into place.

She waited a moment, to make sure Xander was really going back to sleep. Spike opened one eye and looked at her. She grinned, waved, and tiptoed out of the room.

They managed to have a quiet evening. Watching TV while Dawn did her homework, Willow and Tara helped without actually breaking down and giving her the answers. There were no more visits from should-be-in-bed-people, and finally they were all yawning, themselves. Dawn gathered her things and said goodnight, leaving Willow and Tara to put out the lights before heading upstairs as well.

The quiet lasted as they got ready for bed, and crawled under the covers and cuddled. Willow was almost asleep, and knew Tara was already asleep, when she heard someone come into the room.

"Huuh..." Opening her mouth to ask who was there also opened the way for a yawn. She sat up, and peered at the small figure in the doorway. "Xan? Once was fine, but it's not really funny anymore."

"Willow?"

"Yeah, Xander. If you were hoping for a peek at our nighties, I hate to disappoint you, but we're wearing sweats."

He shuffled a bit further into the room, until she could see the look on his face, in the faint light that came in the window from the back porch light. "Xander?"

"I'm scared."

"Xan.."

"Really scared. I don't know why, and I don't like it."

"Xander?" She could see that he wasn't kidding, this time. It occurred to her that he might not have been, earlier. She held out her arms, and Xander hurried forward, climbing onto the bed and into her lap. She held him close, and leaned down to see his face.

He really was scared.

"Did you have a bad dream?" she asked quietly, though she could see that Tara had opened her eyes and was listening.

Xander shook his head. "Don't think so."

"Did Spike kick you in his sleep?"

Again, he shook his head. "I just woke up. And it was dark." He looked up at her, and she felt something clench, in her chest. Right around her heart. It had been so long since she'd seen this face....

There were reasons why Xander had shown up at her window at dawn some days. Reasons why he'd spent the night, as well. The simplest one was that in the Rosenberg home, anybody who wanted a night light could have one. But most of them weren't very simple at all.

She studied his face, and he frowned. "Are you mad? I'll go away if you're mad. I'm sorry."

Willow put a hand on his head, brushing his hair out of his eyes, and closed her own, just for a second. When she opened them, he was still looking at her as if he was afraid he was going to be punished for being scared. Or for coming to tell her about it.

"Oh, no. No, no, Xan, it's okay. " She tried to sound as grown up as possible, while she was wondering where this child had come from who reminded her so much of the Xander she had known back then. She hugged him tightly, rocking ever so slightly back and forth. "I'm not mad. I won't ever be mad. It's ok."

Xander didn't move, for the barest moment. Then he clung to her, digging his fingers into her shirt and burying his face against her chest.

Willow spared a thought that if he *was* faking, he was one dead kid.

But it didn't feel like he was faking it. He seemed really scared. She looked down at him, and asked, "Do you want a night light in your bedroom?" She had no idea where she would find one in the Summers house, but she could always magick up a little fairy light, even make it a soft green color, which she knew Xander would like.

He closed his eyes, and nibbled on his bottom lip. Then opened them again, and shook his head. "Can I... Can I stay here? Please?"

There might have been just a tiny bit of 'Mom left me in the alley, can I have some ice cream' pitifulness in those eyes, but as far as she could tell, most of it was real.

And if there *was* some of that other look in his eyes, maybe it didn't matter. She couldn't imagine Xander ever having tried asking his *own* parents if he could sleep with them. Or if he had... Was it wrong of her not to want to know what had happened, if he had? She glanced over at Tara.

Who blinked once, then smiled, and nodded. Scooted over towards the wall to make room.

"OK, Xander. You can stay here with us." She turned to ease him down onto the bed between her and Tara; Xander was still holding onto her as he laid down. Willow half-expected him to stick his thumb in his mouth -- then she smiled. "I'll be right back."

Willow disentangled herself from Xander, which was difficult when he pouted harder at her. She slipped away, though, and sneaked down the hall to Buffy's room. When she came back, she had Mr. Gordo in her hands.

She found Xander curled on his side, snuggled up against Tara but watching the door for Willow's return. She came over to the bed and held out the stuffed pig. "I don't think Buffy will mind if you borrow Mr. Gordo."

Xander looked at her doubtfully for a moment, even though she'd seen his hand twitch towards the stuffed animal. Then he took it, still frowning slightly as if not sure it was proper for a boy to want to sleep with a stuffed toy, and held it tightly in both arms.

She shot Tara a look over his head, as he settled in between them. The 'we must talk later' look. Although half of what they needed to talk about was probably evident on her face. This was more than just subconscious childlike behavior at the table or over toys, because everyone *expected* them to act like kids. This was something different.

*What* it was, she couldn't be entirely sure of, but hopefully it would keep until morning.

One hand on Xander's shoulder, one tucked beneath his neck, she lowered her head to the pillow.

She wasn't even remotely close to sleep, this time, before another small figure appeared in the doorway. Spike, hair standing out around his head, rubbing his eyes with both hands, and blinking at her. Worried. "Where's Xan? He's gone. I can't find him."

She'd barely lifted her hand to wave him over, when Spike's eyes darted to Xander, and Spike was scrambling up onto the bed and wriggling under the covers next to him. Willow blinked, and stared at him. He wrapped himself around Xander, as he had when she'd taken Xander back to bed earlier, and closed his eyes.

Willow opened her mouth to ask Spike what the heck he was doing. Then she shut it. If Xander really was upset, then she couldn't very well demand that Spike go back to the other room and sleep with Giles. Willow glanced towards the door. Giles wasn't going to sneak in here too, was he?

She had almost decided he wasn't, when she heard the padding of bare feet in the hallway, and a little head poked around the door frame. "Er... did they come in here to bother you? I'm sorry. Come on, you two, come back to bed."

Xander popped his unsleeping head up. "Nuh-uh. Not goin'."

"Oh, come on, Xander--"

Spike looked up at Giles, and calmly stuck his tongue out. "He doesn't wanna go, he doesn't have to."

Willow took a deep breath, refrained from rolling her eyes, and *did* shake her head. "No, Giles, they're not bothering us. It's okay."

Blink of sleep-fuzzed eyes. "Oh. Well. All right, then, I guess." He peered at the two others in the middle of the bed, then turned around to go, carefully squaring his shoulders. Walking slowly back towards Buffy and Dawn's bedroom.

Willow sighed, to herself. "Giles? There's room for one more."

He stopped, but looked over his shoulder. "No, I don't need to. I don't mind having the bed to myself for once."

Willow scooted towards the edge of the bed as much as she could, and saw Tara do the same. They grabbed the SpikeXander amoeba and pulled them towards Willow, making enough space for one more four-year-old.

"Come on, Giles. Plenty of room." Tara patted the bed.

Giles hesitated, though he didn't head towards them, neither did he continue down the hall back to Buffy's room. "I don't really...."

Spike lifted his head slightly and grinned in Giles direction. "Bawck, bawck, bawckawckkk..."

"I beg your pardon..."

"He's calling you a chicken," Xander mumbled sleepily. "Get in bed already. M' tired."

"You don't wanna see him get grumpy," Spike warned.

Willow agreed. Grumpy Xander meant he'd give you the mad-face. Which could shatter mirrors and frighten small furry animals.

Giles shrugged. "I suppose," he said hesitantly, coming all the way into the room. "If you insist." He climbed carefully up onto the bed and lay down between Tara and Xander.

Willow waited until the three additional bedmates were settled, before she lay her head down again. Spike had stolen most of her pillow, and she briefly considered getting into a tug-of-war with him for it. She'd always won those with Xander, but she wasn't sure she could overcome even tiny vampire strength.

Besides, she had to admit, Spike and Xander -- and Giles -- looked too cute to disturb.

As long as Spike didn't kick her.

********

"I wanna watch Batman Beyond!" Xander had the remote, and was holding it over Giles' head.

Giles couldn't quite jump up and grab it, or he would spill his bowl of Fruity Pebbles, so he settled for whining. "What's wrong with Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood? They have puppets."

"'Cos it's silly. How could that little puppet king be that big human girl's uncle? What, her mum was human and her dad was a puppet?" Spike was ensconced on the other end of the couch with a *giant* bowl of cereal.

"Yeah, I always wanted to know that too," Buffy said. "And anyway, we've seen all those shows. The cartoons are new ones."

In the kitchen, Willow leaned over to Tara. "Now would *not* be the time to tell them about my mother's paper on the Freudian significance of the trolley going though the tunnel to get to the happy fantasy land, I'm thinking."

Dawn looked up from her cereal at the table. "What?"

"Nothing."

"I'm not sure they'd...get it," Tara said, glancing worriedly towards the four children arguing over the remote.

Willow nodded. "It's weird. Something's...definitely not-hunky-dorey about this."

"You mean how they're arguing over a TV show that two weeks ago none of them had ever heard of?" Dawn asked.

Willow looked at her. "I think Spike and Xander probably have watched it before."

Dawn raised an eyebrow. "At 9 o'clock on a Saturday morning?"

"Well, I think it was on in the afternoons...but that's not what's weird. I mean, it is what's weird. But not what's really weird. It's like they've all stopped trying to be grown-ups, anymore."

Dawn nodded. "Yeah. Buffy threw a real hissy-fit when she found out Spike and Giles and Xander got to sleep with you guys last night. I thought she was just kidding, you know, 'cause she started the pouting thing, but she sat on the bed with her arms crossed for twenty minutes, and wouldn't talk to me." She frowned, looking a bit worried. "Do you think that spell is messing with their brains, too? Like, brain damage kind of messing?"

Willow and Tara exchanged glances, confirming that they'd each had the same thought -- and weren't going to give in to it.

"No, I don't think so. Giles said the spell wouldn't do any permanent damage," Willow said.

"You mean, Giles who had already been affected by the spell when he researched it, Giles?" Dawn asked.

Willow just looked at Dawn for a moment. Then she turned to Tara. "I think we should call our other stuffy British former-Watcher good with the languages person."

Tara nodded, but as Willow went over towards the phone, said thoughtfully, "I don't think he's stuffy, anymore."

There were four screams from the living room - difficult to tell if they were screams of delight or anger, but they were definitely not the "there is real blood and pain here" type of screaming. All three grown-ups ignored them.

Dawn frowned. "Do we need to get somebody else, then? I think stuffiness may be a requirement for the job..."

"I think we'll have to make do with non-stuffy language Watcher guy," Willow said as she dialed. "I don't *know* anybody else."

Soon she was exchanging greetings with Cordelia, and explaining the situation in between fits of hysterical laughter on the other end of the line.

"You mean they're *all* like three feet tall, and wearing Underoos?" Cordelia asked. "Even Giles?"

"No, Giles wouldn't wear the Underoos. Which was a good thing, because they only had two packages left, and Xander and Spike were fighting over who got Batman and who had to be stuck with Spiderman. Is Wesley actually *there* ? Because there'll be plenty of time to laugh at them later, you know."

"Oh, sure. Hey, I don't suppose you took pictures?"

Willow found herself suppressing a sigh. "Yes, we have pictures. Lots of pictures. I'll give you copies of everything. Can I talk to Wesley? This is kinda serious."

"What, they aren't going to bed on time? OK, OK, hang on."

Willow had to hold the phone away from her ear as Cordelia yelled. She shook her head, then had to repeat her story once Wesley came on the line. He, at least, asked relevant questions, and listened to her.

He still chuckled.

When she hung up the phone, there were two expectant face looking at her, and four youthful voices still raising a minor ruckus in the next room. "Wesley thinks he's heard of the Urdeku, but he's not all that familiar with it. He wants to come up here and check out the books."

"Couldn't you just scan them and e-mail it to him?" Dawn asked.

Willow smiled mischievously. "I think he also wants to come up here and check out the kids." A bit more seriously, "He's never heard of it causing any lasting damage, and he thinks Giles was probably right, but he wants to see for himself how they're acting, so maybe between us we can figure out what's happening."

Dawn blew a raspberry. "He just wants to take videos of Giles so that he can blackmail him with them later."

Willow's eyes went wide. "Videos! We need a video camera. Do we have a video camera?" she asked Tara.

Tara patted her on the arm. "Maybe we should think about getting them turned back into grown-ups, instead."

*****