They walked in silence into the hotel. The sounds of their footsteps echoed from the walls only to disappear into the high ceilings. Tension rung high and no one's eyes meet another's. Xander clung heavily to his Sire, his body shaking with fear and uncertainty, holding onto the one thing that gave him a small measure of peace. His demon screamed inside his head, while his soul cringed into a dark corner, hiding from the new truths revealed to it that night.
Angel walked stoically, his face the perfect mask. One arm wrapped around Xander's waist while his other tightly gripped his sword. His mind was in a whirlwind, demon and soul warred within him for dominance and a small tremor passed through his body before he quickly suppressed it. Xander was fragile now, broken in by his fears, and Angel had to remain strong for him or his Childe would shatter.
Gunn scowled, his face a perfect picture of repressed fury and rage. His arm tensed and relaxed in nervous reflex, the handle of his axe stroked rhythmically by his motions. He stared ahead, too angry to notice his surroundings, he was simply trying not to explode and let his dark emotions break forth and devour him.
Wesley squeezed his eyes shut before opening them once again, his gaze filled with hundreds of emotions. Fear, anger, and hurt mixed within him to form a confused mess and the former Watcher found his arms wrapped tightly around his torso as if to ward off a physical blow.
The last to walk in was Spike. He crept in, trying to remain on the fringes of view, not wanting or needing the attention he was soon to be the focus of tonight. His emotions were at once both triumphant and terrified. His demon screamed in victory while his mind cried out in fear. His mask of indifferent superiority was lost now. He could no longer find the will within himself to bring forth that arrogant facade and so his face remained blank. The only outward sign of his inner turmoil was a flick of his eyes every few seconds to a tall, lanky human before he would force them back in place only to repeat the gesture.
They filed in, one by one, the new discoveries of this night rocking all of them to the core. Angel stopped when he reached the middle of the lobby, pulling his youngest childe into an embrace. Xander melted into him and Angel breathed in his scent, closing his eyes as his demon re-acknowledged for the thousandth time that night that its mate was safe and unharmed. He caressed the face of the younger vampire before raising his eyes and pinning Spike in place with his eyes.
"Upstairs." Angel's voice was quite but the underlying fury caused Xander to clutch closer instinctively. Angel murmured quietly to Xander while watching Spike.
Spike moved quickly, the call of his Sire singing in his veins, making him obey without question and he was upstairs and waiting before his absence even registered with those he left downstairs. He stood in the room, body quivering in fear, knowing that these were his last few moments of life. No longer would he pace the halls of the monstrous building nor breathe in the scents of the small garden. He closed his eyes and tried to calm his demon who was no longer triumphant. It quelled under the threat of his Sire, trying to retreat but unable to, knowing its dark fate.
In the lobby, Angel whispered in Xander's ear, faint words no human had any hope of hearing. He petted the dark locks of his Childe's head and caressed a shaking back, trying to impart his calmness and stability into the fragile being he held. After endless moments the body finally stilled and after once more breathing in Xander's scent, Angel released his hold and stepped back from the now quiet boy. He lifted Xander's chin and stared him in the eye, before placing a gentle kiss upon his lips and turning around.
Gunn, Wesley, and Xander stood mutely while Angel ascended the stairs slowly, his shoulders straight and his head high. For one moment, Xander found pity in his heart for his blood brother before he started shaking. He missed his Sire already. Ached for the arms, and the scent and the taste but he would have to wait for now. Angel had much more important things to do.
*****
Spike started when he felt his Sire's approach and leaped into a corner, trying to blend into the shadows before calling himself a fool. He strode into the middle of the room and knelt, splaying his hands on his thighs and bowing his head in supplication. He only waited a few moments before the door opened. He sensed his Sire staring at him for a moment before Angel closed the door and walked past him. He flinched when he heard the soft creaking of leather and wondered what was to happen now. Angel's voice told him he would not have long to wait.
"Turn, facing me, but remain in your position." Using all his skills as a vampire, Spike pivoted gracefully, not one finger twitching out of place as he turned to face his Sire. A long silence stretched in which Angel's eyes bored into him and a moment of anger flared through him. Stop with the silences already, he screamed in his mind, before remembering that silence bought time and time was precious to him now.
"I take you in, trust you, give into your caring and instruction that which I hold most dear and yet I cannot find myself surprised at this betrayal." Angel's voice was calm, his tone even, lacking even the slightest inflection to give Spike a clue as to his fate. He moved to speak before snapping his jaw shut. He had not been given permission to speak and so he would hold his peace and pray that his suffering would be shorter for it.
"When we left tonight, I had hopes. It was Xander's first true fight after all your training. His test. I wanted to see him succeed and he did, until someone leapt from the shadows and took away his rights. Tell me Spike, why did you follow us?" Spike was momentarily startled. That was all? Angel was upset because Spike followed them and took away Xander's first true opportunity to prove himself? But then he realized that Angel was starting off slow. Angel and Angelus always started slow. They liked the build up. He would start with the unimportant and work his way up to the things you ended up screaming over.
He swallowed several times before finding his voice and when he did it was nothing of his normal tone. This Spike was submissive, supplicating himself to the one who held true dominion over him. "I...I don't know Sire." Spike winced internally. Wrong answer. That was always the wrong answer.
"Need I ask again, Childe?" Angel asked, voice cold and hard.
"No, Sire!" Spike was quick to reply. "I was bored. My demon was going crazy. I couldn't stop from going. I needed to see the blood and I needed the violence and..." He cut himself off with a choke, unable to bare his soul to anyone, let alone Angel. And the shame was all the more for his inability to not share.
"You were bored?" And now there was inflection in Angel's voice. Surprise mixed with a heavy dose of anger that would have stopped Spike's heart had it been beating. Angel did not wait for a reply. "Tell me Childe, when you were following us what your plan was? After all, you're incapable of doing violence or so we believed and yet you put yourself at risk. Boredom does not seem like a big enough motive for you."
Spike mentally threw himself against a wall. Of course his Sire wouldn't be happy with that excuse. But he couldn't tell the real reason for going. His shame at his own feelings of weakness would be nothing compared to the humiliation he would suffer if he spoke. He snorted inwardly. How could he not tell, Angel would find out, one way or another but another flash of anger kept his tongue still. He would make Angel earn this knowledge and Angel did not disappoint.
After receiving no answer, Angel rose and walked behind Spike and knelt behind him. He wrapped his arms around the smaller frame and held it in a gentle grasp before his fangs tore into the pale throat before him. Spike screamed in agony, writhing against the steel arms around him, seeking a way to escape the agony of the bite. Sire's can deliver several different kinds of bite's ranging from the intensely erotic, to a warning, to a punishment, to a killing blow. Spike now received the worst. Angel was not playing. He was not warning or teaching, he was killing and it would take only a few deep mouthfuls before Spike was dust on the carpet.
But Angel was not finished yet. He took only a small amount before withdrawing his fangs, licking up the remaining blood from the oozing wound. The flesh tried to heal around the holes but it would not. The Sire had not yet given the Childe permission and so Spike would remain bleeding as if he were mortal until such time as Angel told him he could heal himself.
Spike floated on a wave of pain, which faded as Angel leaned back, arms still around him and purred into his ear. "Now Childe, will you answer?" Spike felt a sob break from his throat before he snapped his mouth shut. His body quivered and he leaned his head forward in humiliation.
"Wesley."
"I'm sorry Childe. Repeat that? I must be getting hard of hearing in my old age." Angel replied, his arms squeezing for a moment before relaxing once more.
"It was Wesley. I was following because I didn't wanna see him hurt. I....my demon...it cries out for him." Spike said, tears running freely down his cheeks.
"Really Spike? Somehow I don't believe you. It's hard you know, after you tried to kill him tonight." Spike had no opportunity to respond before Angel's fangs were in him once again. The blond vampire screamed out in agony, pulses of fire racing down his neck into his body causing him to jerk in Angel's arms. Again, Angel withdrew after only a few moments and gently placed a few more licks to the ravaged neck in mockery of the torture he had just caused.
Spike was weeping now, his body thrumming with pain, his whole world narrowed down to the fire in his blood and the soft voice in his ear.
"Now tell me Spike. The truth now, no more lies. Why.Did.You.Follow.Us?" And this time Angel's voice clearly stated he would not stop this time, he would take Spike into himself until the very last drop. Spike shuddered, trying to regain use of his voice, screaming out his answer as he felt Angel's face descend once more to his neck.
"SIRE PLEASE! I...it's the truth! Didn't mean to attack him. Demon went crazy! No violence, no blood, and the....the one he wanted to claim right there. I couldn't stop...please....Sire....I couldn't stop." Spike broke completely then, leaning back onto the chest of his tormentor, seeking what little comfort he could find. He felt Angel start to purr. The deep rumble flowed through his body and after a short while Spike calmed down enough to take a deep, unnecessary but very much needed breath.
"You wish to claim him? And that is why you attacked? Tell me Childe, why should I believe you? Tonight you have attacked not only Wesley but my Childe as well. For Wesley, I would spare you, given what you have told me." Angel's arms suddenly restricted around Spike and the blond vampire felt fangs brush his neck before Angel continued. "But for Xander, there is no forgiveness. Tell me why you attacked him and the measure of pain you feel before you die will be determined." Spike convulsed as his mind started to shut down. He couldn't. He would never be believed. Not now when he was in so much disfavor with his Sire. He had no chance of not feeling pain. He would not be believed and he would suffer unbearable agony because of it. He never got the chance to attempt a reply however.
"Because I attacked first." Xander whispered from the doorway. The two kneeling vampires startled at the voice and Angel whipped his head around to look at Xander. Angel and Spike had never heard Xander's approach and Spike felt a brief flicker of pride before Xander's words caught up to him. Hope blossomed in his chest and he found himself praying to unhearing gods.
"What?" Angel asked, confusion marring his brow.
"Sire, forgive me, but I couldn't let you kill him. Not when he was only defending himself. I saw him go after Wesley and I just reacted. I jumped at Spike and I....I'm sorry Sire...Spike was only defending himself." Xander explained, dropping to his knees and positioning himself exactly like Spike. Head bowed he did not see Angel's eyes fill with pride and he did not see the unbridled hope shine through Spike's.
Spike felt Angel's arms loosening around him and he knelt up once more, back straight, body quavering, eyes still shedding tears, but now that hope had come he would try to wrap his tattered dignity around himself. He watched as Angel stood and approached Xander before the dark vampire squatted down in front of his youngest Childe. He watched as one of Angel's hands lifted Xander's chin and watched as a small moment passed between the two. So he was startled at Angel's next words.
"You have attacked an elder brother, you have caused him to receive pain and punishment by doing so, and you have disappointed me in not coming to me with this sooner. You know our law. Spike is senior of my Childer while he is here and as such deserves your respect, loyalty, and protection because of it. You are my favored Childe but you are not my only. You will be punished for this. Get up and go to the spare room. You will wait there until you are called for." Angel's hand remained gentle but his voice was deadly serious and Spike had to suppress a surge of absolute astonishment from bursting forth. Angel was punishing Xander over him? After everything he had gone through he simply couldn't comprehend it and his mind tucked away that knowledge for later. Right now, all he wanted to do was pass out. But he couldn't do that yet. Angel was not finished with him.
When the door had closed behind an extremely scared but determined Xander, Angel approached Spike and kneeled before him. "Childe, Spike....you know what has to be done don't you?" Spike shook his head. He had absolutely no idea. When Angelus had tried to drum lore into his head he had usually tuned out. He waited patiently for Angel to explain.
"First of all, as much as it pains me to do so, you have the right to punish Xander. He was the one who attacked you and he was the one who caused most of this harm." Angel said, brushing a finger lightly over the wounds in Spike's neck. "I only ask that when you do...punish him....that it is not too severe. Xander is young and different then most. It is harder for him to understand." To say that Spike was gob smacked was an understatement. Spike was so far in the realm of non-belief he wondered for a moment if he had gotten sucked into an alternative universe. He shook his head to clear it and simply looked at Angel, unable to comprehend.
Angel let out a soft chuckle before continuing. "I'll explain later. Right now, you need blood, rest, and more blood. In that order." Angel rose to his feet, dragging Spike along with him. Spike swayed on his feet, blood loss and emotional trauma serving to make him dizzy. Angel lifted him up and carried him into the bedroom and placed him on the bed before removing his and Spike's clothing. Naked he slipped into the covers, taking Spike with him. Spike didn't protest. He didn't have it in him. He let Angel control his movements while his mind whirled with all the new information. His world had tilted on its axes so far in the past 12 hours he was afraid it was about to spin off into space.
He tensed suddenly when he felt Angel slide his fangs into his neck only to relax when he felt a small tingle that signaled a Sire's healing bite. He felt the tingle make it's way through his body before the familiar tug of released fangs and closing flesh signaled that he was no longer in danger of bleeding to death. He locked his mouth unhesitatingly over Angel's offered wrist and bit lightly, suckling at the intoxicating taste of Sire's blood. He felt energy slowly being restored to him but his body was exhausted and not even Angel's blood was strong enough to pull him to full consciousness. He fell asleep to the sound of a deep, rumbling purr and the feel of his Sire cleaning up the last remaining traces of his blood.
*end*