*****

Angel found Spike the next morning in the kitchen, staring at the microwave intently. Angel noticed that with his presence, the blond vampire tensed but said nothing. Angel walked into the kitchen towards the refrigerator and pulled out his own blood bag and waited for the microwave. They didn't speak to each other and that was fine. It gave Angel time to look at his once favored Childe. He was thin, even thru the black T-shirt he could see Spike's flesh clinging to his ribs. And the jeans, which had once been so tight they looked painted on, were now loose, almost falling down the sharp hipbones. The dark vampire felt a momentary pang for all that could have been. There was a time when Spike would never have thought to ignore his Sire's presence in a room. There was also a time when Angel would never have let Spike get into such an obviously starved state. Even though they had clashed often in the past, the bonds of Sire to Childe had always been strong between them. But no more, 100 years and a gypsy curse had changed all that. And once again Angel thanked the PTB for making his soul permanent so that he could have Xander.

Shaking off his melancholy, he watched as Spike removed his dinner and left the kitchen. Placing his mug in the now empty microwave he sighed. This was going to be difficult.

*****

Xander strode into the training room that had been built on the third floor of the hotel. It had once been two separate rooms but a little renovation and a lot of hard work and it now resembled a modest gym. Training equipment was spaced neatly and in straight lines, courtesy of Angel, and two entire walls were covered in weapons. Everything from stakes, in ten different kinds of wood, to swords and axes.

The room was clean, neat, and straight to the point. You learned how to kick ass here. Xander smiled at this thought and walked to his favorite place on one of the walls. Standing in front of it, he reached out a hand and gently caressed the hilt of an ancient sword. He loved the feel of the blades, how they felt in hands, how they seemed to be a perfect extension of himself. Unfortunately, his skill with them left much to be desired. You just had to ask the mutilated punching bag to know that. He shivered at that memory and at how close he had come to loping off one of Angel's limbs. No, swords were definitely not for him, no matter how good they felt.

"You need to learn how to use your body before you use a weapon." Xander yelped and spun around at the voice that had disturbed his musings. He didn't relax, however, when he saw who it was. Spike was leaning in the doorway, a mug in his hand, and an amused expression on his face.

"Well, that's what your here for, Blondie."

"Right. Now, if I'm to be making my money we need to get started. Take off your shirt."

"What!!?"

"Calm down whelp. Stop hyperventilating, you don't need to breath." Rolling his eyes at the boy's antics, Spike walked into the room and set his mug down. "I need you to take off your shirt so's I can see where you need the most help. Arms, chest, abs? Get the picture now? Can't have you running around with pathetic muscles now can we?"

If he could blush, Xander would be doing so at his embarrassing display of modesty. He was a vampire after all and he wasn't supposed to feel shy anymore. Right, and if he kept telling that to himself he might one day believe it. Still gazing warily at the other vampire, he stripped off his shirt and waited for Spike to inspect him.

Although he would never admit it, Spike was surprised at the shape Xander was in. He guessed Angel had something to do with it but still, the boy took care of himself. He wasn't gonna let Xander know that though.

"Looks like the arms first, then the abs. We also need to work on your senses. I shouldn't have surprised you just now. You shoulda known I was there. Hell, shoulda been able to sense me down the hall but that's a lesson for later. Right now, I want you to try and hit me." Shrugging his shoulders at this request Xander pulled himself into a loose fighting stance and swung at Spike.

The bleached vampire easily stepped to the side and watched as Xander pulled himself together again. "I thought you wanted me to hit you?"

"No. I said *try* and hit me. You're thinking like a human, pet. Try again." They continued on for the next hour. Xander attempting to punch Spike, Spike stepping out of the way and smirking. Over and over again, he swung always missing, sometimes coming close but never making contact. Finally, in pure frustration, he lashed out and *punched* Spike, throwing the older vampire half way across the room with the force of his blow. He froze in shock, watching as Spike picked himself up off the floor, a large grin plastered on his face.

"Nice, pet. Did you feel the anger in you? Gave you strength didn't it? The most important thing you need to realize about being a vampire is that we live off of our emotions. Whether were getting ready to fight, fuck or feed, were all about intense feelings. You just used that and you managed to hit me. You need to learn to let go. Sure, you got a soul but your still a *vampire* and that means playing by a different set of rules. Now, try again."

So Xander hit Spike again, and again, and again and didn't miss once. Finally, Spike held up his hands. He was bleeding from a broken nose and his body was covered in bruises but there was hint of amusement in his eyes and he had a knowing smile on his face. For some reason Xander found this funny and started laughing. He had to grip his sides after a moment and he just began to howl. He heard when Spike began to chuckle and pretty soon he too was rolling with laughter as well. Xander could feel something inside of him shift and he looked over at Spike. For the first time he really looked and he could feel his amusement start to fade away. Now that he was paying attention, Xander noticed that Spike looked horrible. He was thin, more so than usual, and he was paler than he should be. Dark circles surrounded his eyes and were the faint blush of borrowed blood should have been there was only whiteness.

Suddenly he felt an affinity with Spike. He could now imagine what it must have been like for the vampire to lose his control. To never be able to feed, hunt, or even defend himself again. Xander could feel the demon inside him howling out with rage and he suddenly recognized the emotion that was pouring out to him underneath the anger. Kinship. For all intents and purposes, Spike was his brother. They shared the same Sire and thus the same blood. Even if Xander didn't recognize it, his demon did and it cried out with the injustice done to his kin.

With these thoughts racing thru his mind, Xander also recognized how badly Spike had been treated by his friends in Sunnydale. His appearance alone was enough to show how little concern or care Buffy and the others had shown in taking care of him. He had to admit though, that if he had still been living there when the blonde vampire had been chipped he would probably have treated Spike with the same disregard. He felt bad about this. Now he knew that thru sheer ignorance and blind hate, they would have let Spike wither away into ash, not even knowing they had been the cause.

Spike suddenly realized Xander wasn't laughing with him and looked up. What he saw in the boy's eyes drew a shiver up his spine. Pure rage and hatred emanated from his eyes and for a moment he felt fear, until he saw that it wasn't directed at him but at some other thing creeping around in Xander's head. He simply stared for a moment until whatever had been affecting the boy seemed to slip away and his eyes were once again filled with laughter, though faded now. At that moment he realized that once properly trained, Xander would be a force to be feared and respected by all. He really shouldn't be surprised, his Sire always did know how to pick them.

The moment broken, Spike gathered himself up and sat down beckoning Xander over. The boy sat next to him and he began to lecture him on how to use his emotions to his benefit. How to control them, when to utilize them and when to shove them to the side and ignore them. Spike knew it would be hard for Xander, his demon wasn't in control, the soul was and that would make learning that lesson much harder. Instead of acting on instincts as he would as an un-souled demon, he would have to make conscious decisions and then act on them. So, in this training session, Spike tried to impress this on Xander because there was nothing more dangerous to everyone than an out of control vampire.

*****

Later that evening, Xander bounded down the steps into the lobby of the hotel. He saw Cordelia and Gunn arguing over a catalog. They didn't even notice him, so he bi-passed them heading in the offices. Glancing at Wesley he saw the former Watcher deeply engrossed in a book, forgotten cup of tea perched on the edge of the desk. He shook his head at that sight and wondered if the scholar even knew he was about to make a huge mess. He guessed not when after a moment, the expected crash occurred and the demon hunter began to frantically try to clean up the mess, curses flying from his mouth in a truly stunning display of demon vocabulary.

Smiling, he walked into the kitchen and saw Angel waiting for his blood to heat. The dark vampire glanced up and grinned opening his arms. Xander snuggled into the embrace and breathed deeply of his Sire's scent. He could feel all of his worries melting away as Angel ran his hands thru his hair. He heard the faint rumbling of his mate's purr start up and he felt a deep sense of love overcome him. Here, in his Sire's arms he was whole and nothing else mattered.

The End