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Scene: St Louis., Missouri | Kiel Center Parking Lot
Time: Friday, 12.19.03 - 9:23 PM
Next Match: @ xplosion! Vs. 7 Other Men [ MAIN EVENT- Hell In A Cell Match ][| y-2-j |] United States Champion... that's what eight NWA:TNA Superstars are attempting and trying so hard to achieve this Saturday Night when they give it their all and in the next two weeks they will be given that shot but only one will be the true Champion, only one out of the two men that walk out this Saturday Night in St. Louis Missouri will be The True United States Champion. And with the Christmas Season upon us and the biggest Holiday of the year only a little over a week away you can bet every NWA:TNA Superstar involved in this Hell In a Cell Elimination matchup wants nothing more than to take a Holiday break knowing that when they come back they've got a United States Title shot lined up for them. It isn't clear what Shane and Stephanie McMahons plans are for The NWA:TNA World Heavyweight Championship but one can bet that whomever wins The United States Title will rightfully be the man who could very well be The NWA's first ever World Champion, without a doubt. So with some NWA:TNA titles being decided this saturday and the foundation of the company finally being shaped, now is the time for a Superstar to rise up above the rest and prove he is the superior, now is the time to destroy any hopes that your opponents might have of becoming the best themselves.. NOW is the time for 'Why-2-Jay' Chris Jericho to grab hold of this opportunity and show that he is the man and that he is, without a doubt.. The HIGHLIGHT.. OF THE NIGHT. [| y-2-j |] " Merry Christmas Junior.. "
Jeri-Tron 2003: After seeing the dispicable display of agression we saw from Chris Jericho at The Mall when he visciously attacked The St. Louis Malls Santa you'd think the last thing Chris would be thinking about is Christmas. Having gotten that out of his system you'd think maybe he'd have his mind on The U.S. TItle and his match but no, not Chris. Y2J is currently in the Kiel Center parking lot dawning a full Santa Suit, Hat, and Beard.. to his left is his "Personal Security" Ralphus whom is sporting a nice Green Elf hat and a nciely wrapped gift in his arms. Surrounding the two is a couple of Christmas Trees, a big red carpet and a crowd about about 20-30 people who have formed in a line to come and See Chris.. err I mean Santa Clause.
KING OF THE UNIVERSE -> Chris Jericho: " Come one, come all, welcome to the festivities Juniors.. I'm sure that you all were looking for a real Santa Clause when you came down here but if you clearly heard the ad it states Santa CHRIS.. as in me, Chris Jericho.. your Lord and Saviour and the next NWA:TNA United States Champion would be here. Did you ass clowns actually think that I would allow some fat slob like "Santie Clause" anywhere near where I am going to perform. Why would I want some old Folk Tale like St. Nick bringing me bad luck when this Saturday Night I am going to win the biggest match yet in The NWA. As far as I'm concerned That worn out Jolly Jackass is below me, yeah you heard right he's below Chris Jericho! and on December Twenty First, just Four days before Christmas Day Chris Jericho will make a new Holiday.. it will be a Holiday that all of my Loyal Jerichoholics will be celebrating because that will be the day to remember when I, Chris Jericho.. NWA:TNA's BIGGEST and BRIGHTEST Star pushed that Trailer Park Trash Jamie Noble aside, showed Randy Orton what a LIVING Legend.. is all about, and when I Totally Punked Out, The so-called "Phenomenal One" AJ Styles. Can Styles say that he was the first ever Undisputed Champion?.. Can AJ Styles say that he's done even half of what I've done in one Year of my Career than he has in his entire Career?.. No he can't, because AJ Styles is just a little bug on my windshield of success and he doesn't amount to Diddly Squat when he's compared to The King of The World. "
Jeri-Tron 2003: Ralphus goes to clap but almost drops the gift he was holding in the process. Jericho and his Cat like reflexes is able to catch The falling Box before any real damage is done as he sets it down beside him reaching his hand up and smacking Ralphus in the back of the head.
KING OF THE UNIVERSE -> Chris Jericho: " What did I tell you earlier Ralphus? Didn't I say, DO NOT DROP THE BOX.. Huh? Was that not the exact words that came out of my mouth? Do you have any idea what you would have done if that Box just happened to fly open and all these stupid people here in St. Louis were the first to see my gift to The NWA. That would have ruined all of my plans. Now just stand there and try and look cute, think Keibler Elf not those freaky little Monsters from that Gremlin Movie Elf. "
Pleasantly Plump -] Ralphus: " Sorry Chris, It's just that I am so excited about this new Holiday of yours.. But what day was it on again? I Forgot.. "
KING OF THE UNIVERSE -> Chris Jericho: " December Twenty First Ralphus, that will be the day when I take my first step to become The World Heavyweight Champion. Everyone walks around backstage talking all this trash about how disgraceful it would be for a Canadian to be United States Champion. But that's not what it's about Ralphus, no.. it's about me proving yet againe just what Chris Jericho is all about. It's Triple H's chance to realize that this isn't The WWE and that he can't just Screw everyone.. in every aspect to get his way, no offense Steph. It's all a part of my Master Plan, yes that's right Chris Jericho has a plan and it only involves the elite.. it only involves The Jerichoholics and those who see through all of the lies, all of the hype. Because if you people here in St. Louis had half a brain you would realize that nobody in this Hell In a Cell Match.. not Triple H, not Chris Benoit or Batista.. NOBODY wants this match more than me. They're all afraid because there is going to be Fifteen feet of Steel Cage surrounding each and every one of us. But they needn't be afraid of that, no no no Junior.. they should be afraid of the fact that Chris Jericho who is The Baddest Mamma Jamma to ever step foot on American Soil isn't going to be taking any prisoners.. no I won't show any mercy on any of your worthless lives because you were stupid enough to step through that steel door and get into the ring with a man who is more determined, more hellbent on being the best that anyone has ever seen. "
Jeri-Tron 2003: A little boy standing in the front of the line walks up to Chris and Ralphus holding a piece of paper in his hand. Chris looks down at the boy and grins straightening his Santa hat.
 KING OF THE UNIVERSE -> Chris Jericho: " Well well well, what do we have here? And what's your name little boy? Are you here to tell Santa Chris what you want for Christmas?.. because if you are, I'm not giving away any presents little boy. Only pain and suffering to my opponents this Saturday Night in The Hell In a Cell Match.. "
Jeri-Tron 2003: The Boy Shakes his head and hands the paper to Chris. He looks down and begins to read the paper. " All I Want for Christmas is Chris Benoit to Kick your Butt." Jericho laughs, crumpls the paper into a ball and tosses it on the ground taking the Santa hat from atop his head and throwing that to the ground as well in a fit.
KING OF THE UNIVERSE -> Chris Jericho: " That's real cute Junior but I'm afraid that wont be happening on Saturday. No you see because Chris Benoit.. just like Santa Clause can never add up to my greatness. I am the superior Canadian, Chris Benoit is nothing but a toothless freak who is going to find out, the hard way.. just how competitive The NWA:TNA is. Chris Benoit will find out this Saturday that Chris Jericho is better.. Ralphus, take this Ignorant little miniature Chris Benoit fan away from my presence, he reeks of Urine. "
Jeri-Tron 2003: Ralphus picks the boy up and walks over to what looks like his parents and hands the boy to them as he walks back taking his rightful place beside Chris again as a voice speaks up inside the crowd of people.
'Simplee Gorgeous' George Frankenstein: " Oh Santa, Santa... i've been waiting in line all day... I think i've stood quite long enough if you ask me, and now I also believe that it's my turn to sit upon your lap. "
Jeri-Tron 2003: Out from the crowd comes (Gorgeous) George Frankenstein dawning a Christmas Hat.. Skirt.. and stockings. She's got the whooole getup as Jerichos' eyes widen as she walks up the red carpet and runs a finger through his beard/goatee.
KING OF THE UNIVERSE -> Chris Jericho: " Well if it isn't Georgie Porgie herself. What brings you here Toots? You know there's a Height Limit to this type of thing dont you Junior? "
'Simplee Gorgeous' George Frankenstein: " Well if my memory serves me correctly I remember you leaving me an open offer to see what you're capable of. Well here I am... and with it being the christmas season and all now, and you're dressed up as Santa... I thought why not dress up as well and see how magical we can make this moment together. "
KING OF THE UNIVERSE -> Chris Jericho: " Well that's really cute of you Georgie but I was in the middle of explaining to all of these people, how I am going to be their Champion.. their UNITED STATES Champion. That is the country we're in isn't it? I thought I was in China when I was in that Mall. Don't you people take Showers?! "
'Simplee Gorgeous' George Frankenstein: " Well Jericho... anythings possible, we're just a few days from Christmas y'know. Maybe you'll recieve an early Christmas present from Santa this year... one that i'm sure if given the chance you'd hold onto for months to come. "
KING OF THE UNIVERSE -> Chris Jericho: " This isn't about Gifts, this isn't about Giving. This is about me, kicking the living hell out of Seven other Pathetic excuses for Superstars and going on to becoming the best that this business has to offer. I've done it before and I'll do it again so I know what I'm getting for Christmas. You're here because you're the one who needs an early Christmas gift. You can't fool me Gorgeous I'm not as stupid as Chris Benoit or Batista. "
'Simplee Gorgeous' George Frankenstein: " Well Chris, you're quite a smart guy aren't you? It's been obvious i've had a thing for you Chris Jericho. I was just always so intimidated by you and afraid to show it. But now i'm in a giving mood.. and I know for a fact that you've been feeling the same way as myself. Therefore i'd like to offer you the once in a lifetime experience of having me in your corner. "
KING OF THE UNIVERSE -> Chris Jericho: " You know what.. I'll tell you this Georgie, I wont say no and I wont say yes. Because you know why? The Scene in that Hell In a Cell match isn't going to be Pretty like you Gorgeous no.. it's going to be a Warzone down there, a one man Bomb Squad is what you'll see. All of my opponents nothing but rubble beneath my feet as I deck The Cell with my opponents Blood. So if you want to come down and witness all that I wont stop you babe.. just make sure not to wear any white cause things could get real.. DIRTY. " [ Jericho winks ]
'Simplee Gorgeous' George Frankenstein: " Well Christopher.... I think i'll have to rethink this offer then. I mean... do I really want to bear witness to all these guys being totally demolished by the Worlds Greatest Wrestler Chris Jericho? HELL YES! Chris, consider the deal sealed... I will indeed be ringside this Monday night and I will make sure that your match is nothing short of SIMPLY GOOOOORGEOUS! "
Jeri-Tron 2003: All of the sudden another voice can be heard from within the crowd. Struggling to get to the front of the line we see NWA:TNA Superstar and one half of TEAM VITAMIN C- Christian fighting his way towards Chris, Ralphus, and George. He finally reaches them as he pats himself off ridding himself of some mystery substance that must have gotten on him from the people in the crowd.
'KING O' COOL' Christian: " Hey whatsup Chris, Gorgeous, R-Man. I came as soon as I heard that Santa Clause was going to be right here, in the parking lot of The Kiel Center. Oh boy I can't wait dude I'm so excited.. [ Christian Pauses ] So where's he at? I see all this spiffy setup he's got going on here but where's the fat man himself at, I want to shake his hand for making one of the sweetest Holidays ever. "
KING OF THE UNIVERSE -> Chris Jericho: " You idiot Christian, there is no Santa Clause here today. I thought it was just the people of St. Louis that were stupid but not you too Christian. Open your eyes Junior, I am Santa Clause. "
'KING O' COOL' Christian: " You're Santa Clause Chris? No way dude.. my own tag team partner is The Jolly One himself.. this is Totally Awesome! "
KING OF THE UNIVERSE -> Chris Jericho: " No No you've got it all wrong Christian, I'm posing as Santa to get these idiots to come down here and listen to what I have to say. All the people of St. Louis need to be forwarned that I will soon enough be there new United States Champion if they like it or not. That title might as well be around my waist already because after the little Holiday break we get Christian I will not be beat. Just as sure as Batistas Little Blonde Bitch Trish Stratus wants my Y-2-JUNK I will be Champion.. "
'KING O' COOL' Christian: " Yeah Trish Totally wants it, she wants your Y-2-... What?.. [ Christian Whisper in Jerichos Ear ] Wait, What the hell is Y-2-Junk Chris? "
KING OF THE UNIVERSE -> Chris Jericho: " my Jolly Giant you Jackass.. "
Jeri-Tron 2003: Christian still looks on puzzled.
KING OF THE UNIVERSE -> Chris Jericho: " Chestnuts and Candy Canes?.. Ahhh nevermind Christian, just forget it.. it isn't important anymore. What is important though is the impact that I will make upon The NWA:TNA Saturday Night when I single handidly annihialate and dismantle each and every single opponent of mine in that MAIN EVENT, Hell In a Cell Match. I am going to make The Game wish that I would run out of Quarters.. I will make Chris Benoit wish he could be kissing a Blender instead of fighting me in a Steel Cage.. and I will make "The Phenomenal" AJ Styles PEE-NOMENAL, forcing him to pee his pants from fear of WHY.. TWO.. JAY - JUNIOR.. Justin Credible, Jungle Girl, they were nothing compared to what I will do in that Hell In a Cell to those Seven Unlucky Souls, that Steel Sanctuary that will be the beginning for me, and the end for every other Ass Clown Involved. Mark my words.. Saturday December Twenty First Juniors, mark it on your calendars because that is the day that Chris Jericho unleashes a deadly virus upon The NWA and anyone standing in his way to the top.. That will be the day that The NWA:TNA is infected with A.. "
 [| y-2-j |] Chris stands up out of the seat ripping the Santa Coat and pants off where he has his normal clothes underneath. The Four of them leave as the St. Louis crowd begins to get restless now realizing that there will be no seeing Santa tonight and that come Saturday it will be HELL IN A CELL.. CHRISTMAS STYLE.. [| y-2-j |]
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