"No, Master, please... not the zoo!"

As the words left his mouth, Obi-Wan's eye brows climbed to a seemingly impossible height, as if trying to escape from off his face altogether. His master turned to look at him, stifling the slightest of sighs and crossing his arms across his chest to emphasize that the situation was irrevocable. Not that Qui-Gon didn't sympathize with his 21-year-old apprentice; a trip to the zoo with the youngest of the Jedi initiates would not have been high on his own list of must-do things. But there really was no choice...

"I'm sorry, Obi-Wan, but this is not negotiable. The whole idea for this Padawan/Initiate excursion belongs to Master Yoda, and from experience it's better to bow and do as commanded. Not to mention less painful". Qui-Gon stroked his short beard absently. "For such a small being, that stick of his has a considerably impressive reach."

One look at Obi-Wan's rapidly paling features told him that his attempt to inject some humor into proceedings had not been well received. The voice became firm once more.

"You'll just have to grin and bear it, Padawan. You're going with the others from the temple and that is an end to it". Qui-Gon walked past his dejected apprentice into their living quarters, seating himself with as serene an expression as he could muster under the trying circumstances. He understood Obi-Wan's dismay. Both of them had more than earned a break from the constant field missions and somewhat tedious diplomatic duties that had become such a large part of their lives. The boy was feeling jaded, and Qui-Gon had promised some down time. But the Council had found a way to intrude on that, too. And neither of them liked it. As Obi-Wan followed his master into the room, Qui-Gon noticed the usual sparkle was completely absent from the his padawan's eyes, and in it's place was a look of abject terror.

"But, Master, I'll die!"

At this declaration of woe, Qui-Gon failed to keep a smile from appearing on his lips.

"Don't exaggerate, Obi-Wan".

"I'm not!" Obi-Wan dropped theatrically to his knees. "Master, don't send me out there, please! You have no idea what it'll be like".

"It's only the zoo, and it's only a group of children".

"Only!"

Qui-Gon placed a hand to his broad forehead, trying to concentrate on the living force. Something else was going on here...

"You like children". He replied calmly.

"They don't like me!"

They met each other�s stares in silence for a moment, before Obi-Wan wilted somewhat. "I've already got something to do".

Qui-Gon caught his padawan's nervous gulp. Thought as much, he mused secretly. And I think I know where this is going to go...

"I told Jemmy I'd meet her. She's leaving for Corellia tomorrow and I won't see her for the best part of four months..." The voice trailed off as Qui-Gon's expression became tight-lipped.

Jemmiah Gleshan, the little Corellian street girl that had somehow managed to attach herself to his apprentice on a mission some seven years ago. At the age of ten, she had returned to Coruscant with them, eventually finding herself a home with Mistress Evla, one of the minders in the initiates� cr�che. She remained Obi-Wan's closest friend outside of the temple. That had been until two months ago, when a heated argument between his padawan and the young lady in question had led to Qui-Gon witnessing what seemed to be an unwarranted attack on his apprentice's person.

As if breaking in to his thoughts, Obi-Wan hesitantly ventured "You're not still angry at her, are you?"

"She smashed you over the head with a vase, Padawan!"

"I'm not likely to forget"; Obi-Wan replied dryly, "It was my head, after all. But I've forgiven her, why can't you do the same?"

"It was MY vase", retorted Qui-Gon. "I was up half the night whilst An-Paj pulled vast quantities of glass out of your head."

"I see", Obi-Wan muttered, hands on hips " You're angry because it was YOUR vase, not because it was smashed on MY head." He sniffed. "Thanks a lot, Master. That really makes me feel appreciated! And don't tell me it was valuable because I know that Master Windu gave you it as a joke. He got it dirt cheap off a flea-market in Nargotria."

How did he know that, wondered Qui-Gon? Anyway, that was hardly the point.

"It held great sentimental value."

"You hated it! You told me that if it hadn't been a gift you would have ejected it into deep space!"

"What I'm saying, Obi-Wan, is that we have very little in the way of possessions, which is as it should be. It beholds us to look after the ones we do have, which is also how it should be." He glanced at the chrono on the wall. " It is also time for you to get ready to go on your little trip, which is as it is going to be."

Again the gulp. "What about Jemmy?"

A small hint of irritation surfaced on Qui-Gon's usually impassive countenance. "Until Ms Gleshan has learned how to treat people, and what's important to them with more respect, she will have to do her cooling off on Corellia. And your only date is with a pack of Banthas in that zoo. Now go." He watched his apprentice linger unhappily for a moment. "That's an order, Obi-Wan. And don't try the little-boy-hurt routine either. It may work on the female padawans but it doesn't work with me."

Grumbling to himself, Obi-Wan shuffled to his own room. "There is one consolation, I suppose," he offered Qui-Gon, his rich tones heavy with sarcasm, "at least today can't get any worse".

Once he had left, Qui-Gon exhaled the breath he felt he had been holding for what seemed forever. Neither of them liked arguing with the other, but Jemmiah's little tantrum had let all manner of tensions rise to the surface. It wasn't that he didn't like the girl, only that she seemed to have a hold on Obi-Wan that he didn't particularly care for. His training should always come first.

The door chime sounded, and before Qui-Gon answered it he knew who it was. Sure enough, the door slid back to reveal the concerned figure of Master Windu.

"How did he take it?" Mace asked pointedly.

"About as well as a feral Ffarfalak takes castration" glowered Qui-Gon to his friend. "We could have done without this, you know".

"I'm sorry, Qui. I told Yoda that his idea would not sit well with the padawans, but the little troll wouldn't pay any attention. Said something about being a good learning experience...what's that sound?"

Both men turned towards Obi-Wan's room, where a persistent thumping sound could be heard. "That, if I'm not mistaken my friend, is the sound of my padawan banging his head off the adjoining wall.�

Mace laughed. "He really did take it well! You haven't lost your touch, Qui! How I'd love to be a fly on the wall when he takes those kids round the zoo...Master Yoda!"

Windu's voice seemed to squeak an octave or two higher in shock, as the diminutive Jedi Master appeared from behind him. Damn, his shields were good, Qui-Gon thought. They'd had no inkling of when he'd arrived.

"Something to say, you have?" asked Yoda of his fellow council member.

"Err... I was just telling Qui-Gon how much we liked your idea of today�s little jaunt with the initiates."

"Yes, in fact Master Windu was just telling me how much he would love to be there to see it". Qui-Gon couldn't help but add, only to see the desperation on his friends face turn to a scowl.

Yoda nodded sagely. "Good this is. A volunteer I needed, to keep an eye on things. Get ready, you should. Waiting the padawans and children will be.�

The gleam in Yoda's eye was unmistakable, and Qui-Gon once more fought the urge to laugh. His old master seemed to study him a moment.

"Amusing, you find this, Master Jinn?"

Now Qui-Gon gulped. "Not in the least, Master Yoda".

"Good. Thinking of what you said, I have been. Not enough time you an

d Obi-Wan have away from the temple. Accompany him today you will." "Yes, Master Yoda", Qui-Gon replied bleakly.

"And what of you, Master?" asked Windu politely, "will you be coming with us on this little adventure?"

Yoda looked startled, bat-like ears stretching in disdain at the suggestion. "No. I feel a cough coming on...yes, that's right. A cough". He pulled his cloak more tightly around him. "Would not like to infect young ones with germs." He gave a few feeble attempts at coughing, then began to shuffle away down the corridor. He stopped briefly as he heard the thumping sound coming from Qui-Gon's apartment. "Get your plumbing seen to, you should", he muttered before continuing on his way.

Qui-Gon and Mace looked directly at one another. "A cough, eh? I think we shall have to report that one to An-Paj." Qui-Gon growled. "No doubt he'll have something suitably foul to force down Yoda�s despicable green throat!"

"Anger leads to the dark side, Qui-Gon." sighed Windu.

"Don't lecture me with all that force stuff!"

"Sorry!"

Qui-Gon ran a shaking hand through his long, graying hair. "I don't think you appreciate the seriousness of the situation, Mace,� he paused, wondering briefly if Jemmiah Gleshan had cursed him in some way, "We have to spend the rest of the day dragging a bunch of hyperactive initiates and moody padawans round an impossibly large, not to mention smelly, animal enclosure." He suddenly realized that the thumping in the background had stopped. His padawan had probably knocked himself out, if he was lucky. Now there was an idea.

Mace watched his friend walk over to the wall. "What are you doing, Qui-Gon?" he asked in amazement as his friend started hitting his head against the surface.

"What does it look like? Most people use the force to calm themselves in trying times, but I find this is more relevant to our situation. He gestured to the wall opposite. "Feel like joining me?"

Mace shook his head and walked out the door, leaving a trail of despair behind him. "And Obi-Wan said the day couldn't get any worse!" Qui-Gon groaned.

Somehow he didn't believe that for a moment.

*******

In the hanger waiting for the transport to the zoo twenty Jedi initiates ranging in ages of five to eight chattered incessantly among themselves. Their faces radiated the excitement they felt at an excursion away from the Jedi Temple.

Twenty feet away a group of five padawans stood silently watching. In contrast, their faces hung with all the gloom of death row inmates.

Through the door the last of the group arrived.

Quickly assessing the opposing groups, Qui-Gon led them to the sullen padawans.

"Good day, Padawans." he greeted, wondering if he looked as forlorn as they did.

"Good day, Master Jinn, Master Windu." they responded half-heartedly, bowing their heads in respect.

"Well, I suppose we should get things underway." Mace straightened, taking charge. A quick glance at Qui-Gon received an affirming nod.

From the padawans only unintelligible grumbles could be heard.

In his peripheral vision Qui-Gon saw Mace roll his eyes and could sympathize. It was going to be far worse on the two adults. Both were Jedi Masters and would have to show the best example here. They didn't have the luxury to indulge themselves in adolescent moods, no matter how they felt.

"Ok then" Mace clapped his hands, saying a silent prayer, "let's get this over with.

At that he headed for the children who immediately quieted at the sight of him. Qui-Gon followed a few steps behind his friend then stopped. Turing around he looked at the motionless padawans, his own in particular.

Cocking his head in expectation, a frown on his face he waited for them to join him.

A visible shrug of defiance ran through the group as they forced themselves to follow.

Heaving a heavy sigh, Qui-Gon turned and continued to the transport.

Boy, wasn't this going to be fun?

*******

Qui-Gon and Mace began herding the initiates onto the transport requested by the Council for this endeavor. Glancing back at the padawans, Qui-Gon started to get annoyed by the way they still were lagging back.

Come on, he called to them, None of us want to be here any more than you do, but we all have to take it in stride. Remember that you�re all setting examples for these initiates. Now move!

The group of padawans herded forward, climbing onto the bus. Qui-Gon turned to Mace. �How are we going to organize this? Group the kids up with a padawan and you and I take a larger group?�

Mace grinned. �It�d teach the padawans some responsibility. How many initiates do we have? 28?�

�Yes, that�s right; ten five-year-olds, eight six-year olds, seven seven-year-olds, and three eight-year-olds,� Qui-Gon replied, taking a quick head count, �plus the five padawans, sitting sullenly in a corner.�

�And a partridge in a pear tree. You know, what ever happened to good old missions to warring planets and try to get them to have peace with one another?� Mace asked, looking dejected.

�I don�t know. I just don�t know,� Qui-Gon replied. �All I know is that if we ever catch up with our little green friend, I say we take away his stick and make him in charge of their games for an afternoon or three.�

Mace grinned. �Sounds like a plan to me.�

The ride to the zoo was relatively uneventful, despite the loud chattering of the initiates. The padawans stayed in their corner, discussing quietly what they�d like to do to Yoda on their return. The two masters sat in the middle, keeping an eye on both groups. Soon they arrived.

Pouring out of the taxi, the initiates immediately began to charge the gates. Hiding a grimace, Qui-Gon yelled at them to come back. The group returned dejectedly, looking as though the animals would be gone before they got there. Glancing at Mace, who gestured for him to start, Qui-Gon cleared his throat. �You will be divided into groups to walk around the zoo with, four initiates to a padawan.� Obi-Wan looked up sharply, sending his master a heated look, which Qui-Gon ignored. �Mace Windu and I will have a group of eight. You must stay with your padawan at all times. Padawans, if you have any troubles, and they had better be real problems,� he added, a sharp edge in his voice, �you know how to contact us.�

Mace listed off the initiates that were to go with each padawan, and then gestured for them to head to the entrance. �Let�s go!� he added at the end when everyone had their groups.

Sending Qui-Gon harsh thoughts, Obi-Wan turned to the other padawans before the initiates descended on them. �May the Force be with us,� he said quietly, �because we may all be Sith by the time this day�s over.�

*******

Obi-Wan looked furtively about him, trying to make sure that all the initiates he had been given charge of were still with him. A slight tugging on the arm of his cloak alerted him to the presence of the eldest of the children in his group.

Isadora Lucey.

He shuddered. She had singled him out immediately as her favorite padawan, and when Qui-Gon had added her to his group (which the apprentice could have sworn his master had done on purpose) he had cursed heavily and for a considerable amount of time. And then hoped the insults he'd directed at Qui-Gon had been shielded well enough for them not to be heard. His command of swear words had increased steadily over the years, especially Corellian ones, something Qui-Gon seamed to blame on his friend Jemmiah.

Oh, how she had taught him!

He smirked to himself once more. What would Qui-Gon have said if he had known that with Master Windu's help, he had managed to get a message to the young lady telling her to meet him outside the Gurnaf enclosure in just under an hours time?

He would not be best pleased, he decided. But a Jedi never ran from the battlefield. Well almost never.

The tugging on his sleeve continued, and he was met by two blue eyes that contained nothing but eternal adoration. The sun reflected off a mass of blonde ringlets that momentarily blinded Obi-Wan when he looked down into the child�s face.

"How old are you?" she asked the apprentice, her eyes raking the squirming padawan up and down leaving Obi-Wan feeling like one of the exhibits behind the force field barriers. The question stopped Obi-Wan in his tracks. Here was one battle that he was more than ready to run from if the chance arose!

" Twenty-one. That's far too old for you" he griped mercilessly. She took no notice of the answer, merely content to follow him around with a rapt expression. "That's O.K. I like older men" she sighed.

I think I feel sick, thought Obi-Wan. This is not my idea of a fun day. My friend is leaving Coruscant and I ought to be saying goodbye...properly. Instead I've been stuck with a group of kids with runny noses and Candyfloss in their hair. And the questions! They never stop! My master was so lucky having me for a padawan. I was perfectly behaved. Never got into trouble...well, apart from that time during the Master/Padawan sack race during the temple sports day. How was I to know that they weren't sweets? Sith, I wish these kids would just go away and leave me alone.

Somewhere at the back of his mind he heard a groan. His master was evidently having problems of his own.

Good.

He caught a glimpse of one of the other padawans, 19 year old Simeon Cates, with a child hanging round his neck. He was slowly being throttled, judging by the interesting shade of purple the young man was turning, but this only seemed to add to the delight of the young initiate, as did the rapid gasps for breath.

Even better.

Obi-Wan was in a foul mood. Let them all suffer, he thought. I don't care if this is leaning towards the dark side! The only thing I'm sorry about is that Master Yoda's not here. I'd really love to tell him what he could do with that stick of his...

"Have you got a girlfriend?" asked Isadora, tugging once more at his robe.

"Yes!" snapped Kenobi irritably. Not that he was sure if Jemmy would thank him for that label, but if it would get this little monster off his back, it was well worth it.

The little girl stamped her foot. Hah! That's got her worked up, Obi-Wan noted cheerfully. He watched as she tried to impress him with a flurry of eyelashes and a casual flick of golden hair.

"I'll fight her for you" she remarked, unimpressed. Obi-Wan felt that if he had a proverbial tether; he�d long since reached the end of it.

"I really hope someone claims you as a padawan", he told the little girl nastily, "Because when you are, you'll have to have all that hair cut off, and then what will you do?"

Isadora shrugged. "Don't mind, 'coz then I'll look more like you with short hair" she sighed dreamily.

Obi-Wan gave up in disgust. Come on, Jemmy, he pleaded silently. Save me from these terrifying creatures. I'm hopeless with children and they all know it.

"I'm hungry."

"I want Candyfloss."

"I need to go to the bathroom."

His head was spinning. I AM GOING TO GO MAD, he thought.

Another tug on his robe, but this time from one of the youngest children, a boy named Toms, who Obi-Wan noted with irritation, had the annoying habit of trying to dry his constantly running nose on his cloak.

He counted to ten mentally before smiling at the child through teeth that felt like they would shatter through the strain of being forced into a grin.

"Yes?" he asked civilly.

"What are those creatures doing?"

He turned to see they had made it to the Gurnaf enclosure, only to witness what looked like a very heated and passionate moment of courtship. He felt his face heat as he struggled to find an answer suitable for the boy.

"I don't know", he swallowed, "Why don't we find Master Windu and you can ask him?" The child seemed satisfied with the answer, much to the padawans relief. He viewed the creatures behind the force field once more.

They're having a lot more fun than I am, that's for certain!

He gathered the remaining children into a group and grinned. He knew how to get the kids on his side.

"Who wants to hear my impression of a Draigon?"

*******

OK. The Draigon idea had been a bad one. Perhaps too realistic. The tears were still drying on the youngest boys chalky-white face, whilst one of the others had been sick with fright. On his robe. But it had shut that awful girl up.

As they wandered in a circle for the fourth time round the vicinity of the Gurnaf area, Obi-Wan got the strangest image in his head. One of Master Windu with a large furry Murrit sitting on his head like a hat, and his master holding his side uncontrollably with laughter as it refused to budge. And from somewhere else came the mental image of an exhausted Simeon Cates being pelted with brightly colored Candyfloss.

Master Yoda had a LOT to answer for...