May
2, 2007
Biohazards
defeat Hermets, 4-2
By Don
Ganem
The
Biohazards took the ice last Wednesday in
their new designer-inspired orange-and–black
uniforms; the resulting display of
sartorial shock and awe paralyzed the
normally powerful Hermits, who succumbed
4-2.
“We
knew we couldn’t outskate them, so
we simply decided to out-dress them,”
said Biohazards captain Don Ganem.
“We knew we could do it. Remember -
these are the guys who sent Jack Ryan out
last month with orange stockings and a
lime green sweater – how tacky is
that? “
Team
aesthete Curtis Chen provided insight
into how the victory was achieved.
“The uniform’s design is based
on the Flyers black and white home jersey,
which conveys the power and physicality
of the Broad Street Bullies of the 1970s.
Add to that the dashing and
unconventional orange trim, which summons
the impish, bad-boy persona of Bobby
Clarke, then factor in the imposingly
cerebral and somewhat forbidding
BIOHAZARD logo, emblazoned with the
commanding ‘Authorized Personnel
Only” motto, and you have a fashion
statement of epic force and power. To
tell you the truth, I’m amazed they
were even able to get a shot off.”
Blinded
by this display of sartorial majesty, the
Hermits were unable to stop Pat Escaron,
who hammered in his first of 2 goals off
a feed from sub Neil Parkin in the first
period, giving the ‘Hazards a lead
they would never relinquish. Doug
Gould’s gritty second-effort goal in
the second put the Biohazards up 2-0, but
the lead was cut to one goal when Jack
Ryan scored for the Hermits in the waning
moments of the period. But early in the
third, Sam Colvin, subbing for his
injured dad, sent a hard slapper from the
point that was deflected by Neil Parkin,
who had momentarily distracted Hermits
goalie Tony Riccomini by mooning him in
the low slot. Jack Ryan kept his team in
the game with an early 3rd period goal on
a nice pass from Tim Curry, but Pat
Escaron’s 2nd goal of the night less
than a minute later iced the game for the
Biohazards.
Noting
the success that snappy dressing brought
the team, Ganem vowed that there would be
no let-up in the charm offensive.
“Next week, we’re accessorizing
with some really fabulous silver and
turquoise hoop jewelry based on Hopi
Indian themes, with some Anasazi
influences. And of course, we’ll be
experimenting with Aztec and other Meso-American
iconography on our helmets and gloves. We
want the 5-Beer Minimum to know that if
they mess with us, we’ll rip their
hearts out.”
|
| |
1 |
2 |
3 |
Final |
Biohazards
|
1 |
1 |
2 |
4 |
Hermits
|
0 |
1 |
1 |
2 |
| |
Scoring
Summary |
| |
1st period |
| |
Biohazards |
Pat Escaron 3 (Sub
Player) |
| |
Hermits |
Ben Lee 6 |
| |
2nd period |
| |
Biohazards |
Doug Gould 16 (Sub
Player, D.Ganem) |
| |
Hermits |
Jack Ryan 2 (Sub
Player, B.Lee) |
| |
3rd period |
| |
Biohazards |
Sub Player (Sub
Player) |
| |
Hermits |
Jack Ryan 3 (T.Curry) |
| |
Biohazards |
Pat Escaron 4 (Sub
Player) |
| |
Goalies |
| |
Biohazards |
Sub Goalie |
| |
Hermits |
Tony Ricommini (5-5) |
Belmont
Iceland
815 Old County Road, Belmont, CA 94002
Ph (650) 592-0533 Fax
(650) 592-0503
[email protected]
|
