BALLYKISSANGEL Episode 6.8
"Smoke Signals"
Written by Kieran Prendiville
Transcribed by Margaret Pattison

SCENE: Daytime. Curate's house exterior.

Closeup of Fr Mac's hand on the door knocker, knocks three times.

CUT TO: Fr Vincent's bedroom interior.

Closeup of Fr Vincent in bed. He moves under the covers. We hear three more knocks. Fr Vincent pulls the cover away from his face, opens his eyes, looks around, then pushes the covers away.

CUT TO: Stairs.

Fr Vincent comes down the stairs, dressed in a dark blue T-shirt and grey sweatpants. He presses the heel of his hand to his eye. We hear several more knocks on the door.

CUT TO: Door exterior.

Fr Mac raps his cane against the door. He looks impatient.

CUT TO: Door interior.

Vincent opens the door. Fr Mac enters without waiting for an invitation.

Fr Mac, angrily: Did I or did I not forbid you to marry those people?

Fr Vincent watches him enter, waves his hand, sarcastically: Come in.

CUT TO: Living room interior.

Fr Mac is livid: Don't get smart with me.

Fr Vincent closes the door, walks into the living room, tiredly: I'm a curate, Father. Not an altar boy.
He leans against the wall.

Fr Mac, beside himself: You defied a direct order from your parish priest--

Fr Vincent raises one finger, admonishes: No, no I didn't.

Fr Mac, hotly: Your friend is divorced.

Fr Vincent: I know.

Fr Mac shouts: Of course you know! That's why I refused you permission in the first place!

Fr Vincent: You said, I couldn't use St. Joseph's. I didn't.

Fr Mac: You knew what I meant!

Fr Vincent: I took you at your word.

Fr Mac is speechless, walks away, huffing and puffing.
He exits the house, leaves the door open, hobbles down the walk with his cane.

Fr Vincent scratches his head, not sure what to do.

ROLL TITLES

SCENE: Bank manager's office interior.

Fr Mac is visiting Lucius Cattermole.

Lucius, hands folded, reasonably: Well I know the priest lives there but the fact remains, the house doesn't belong to him, now...given that the previous owner, Paul Dooley, has washed his hands of the place, no longer being able to keep up the payments, naturally--

Fr Mac, angry: Oh get on with it, Lucius!

Lucius, calmly, with the hint of a smile: His time is up, Father. We have a cash buyer. Quick sale. I've already told him he has to go. Pronto.
He gestures with both hands open: Sure doesn't he own the pub.

Fr Mac sighs, tries to remain calm: I will not have my curate living in a public house.
He chews on the inside of his cheek.

SCENE: Fitzgerald's interior.

Fr Vincent is standing at the bar, wrings his hands, talks to someone in the kitchen, pleadingly: Um...Obviously I wouldn't ask unless it was absolutely necessary.

Dermot comes out of the kitchen, sympathetically: Yeah...I hear what you're saying, Father. The problem is, we're full.
He leans over behind the bar.

Fr Vincent: Dermot? I own the place.

Dermot stands up, packet of crisps in hand, shrugs: What am I going to do? Throw people out?
He opens the packet.

Oonagh walks up from behind Fr Vincent, carrying a cleaning rag and a spray bottle: He's right, Father. I'm sorry.
She walks over to Dermot, grabs the crisps away from him, apologetically: He could have put it a bit better. But we are full. Does Father Mac have no room?

Fr Vincent laughs very weakly.

SCENE: Bishop's residence interior.

Fr Mac walks down the hall toward the Bishop's office. He seems very stiff. He knocks on the door.

CUT TO: Bishop's office interior.

The Bishop is standing at the window, looking out, back to the door: Come in.
(Note: According to the credits, the bishop's name is Bishop Goldberg, but this name is never referred to in the episode.)

Fr Mac enters, closes the door behind himself. The Bishop does not budge.

Fr Mac walks toward the desk: You wanted to see me, your lordship?

The Bishop turns around: You gave a commitment to Lucius Cattermole of the Credit Bank of Ireland...that I would buy your curate's house in Ballykissangel.

Fr Mac looks pained: I don't know about a commitment.

Bishop: He thinks you did.

Fr Mac: I just thought it wasn't dignified.

Bishop: Dignified. He owns a public house.
He looks away, petulantly: Let him buy the place himself.

Fr Mac shakes his head: It's...not that simple.

The Bishop looks at Fr Mac, questions: Not that simple? And I suppose, allowing your curate, to marry a divorcee on an open mountain at Ballynacappel isn't that simple either. Did you think I wouldn't find out? Are you conducting an experiment up there at fag or what?

Fr Mac has no answer.

SCENE: Living room interior.

Louis is holding a dog on the table.

Siobhan: Louis, could you be a bit more specific? Er...what kind of funny?
She sits down next to the dog, pets it.

Louis: Er...troubles. Confused, you know? I think...like she wasn't all there.

Siobhan stands, feels the dog's head: Hm. What have you been feeding her?

Louis: Wh- wh- what are you saying?

Siobhan, defensively: I'm only asking.

Louis: Am I, have I been feeding her mad food, is that what you're saying?

Siobhan, gently: No, Louis. Is her diet the same?

Louis, happily: Well of course it is. Sure she'd eat anything.

Siobhan purses her lips, looks at the dog.

SCENE: Daytime. Rainy. Cilldargan street.

Fr Mac is slowly walking along, holding an umbrella. He hears a door close, looks across the street, smiles.

CUT TO: Other side of street.

Another priest comes out of a shop, carrying an umbrella and a plastic shopping bag, hurries away toward a car. Fr Mac follows him.

Fr Mac: Bucky!
He chuckles amiably.

Bucky smiles at Fr Mac.

Fr Mac looks around at the sky: Great day for a dunk.

Bucky: Ah, tis grand up my way.

Fr Mac (his accent becomes much more Irish when talking to this man): Ah, sure, tis always grand up your way.
He takes the bag of dog food that Bucky has under his arm: Here I could have brought this up for you on Thursday.

Bucky puts the other things in his car: Ah, sure I know you could. But I'd have to answer to the dog today.
Something falls on the ground. Fr Mac bends down and picks it up, looks at it. It is a small bottle, looks like shampoo.

Fr Mac, amused: Oh. If this don't shift it, it aim to stay.

Bucky nudges Fr Mac, amused: Ah. Who needs confession, heh?

Fr Mac: Yeah.
He looks at Bucky: Is anger still a sin?
He looks at the bottle again.

Bucky: Good and righteous, is it Frank?

Fr Mac: Oh yeah.

Bucky: I'll see you on Thursday.

Fr Mac: Mm-hm.
He hands the bottle to Bucky.

Bucky holds up the bottle: Will I bring this?

Fr Mac chuckles, walks away.

SCENE: Daytime. Sunny. Woods.

Siobhan is walking along a path next to a stone wall. The dog is with her. She stops and examines a plant on the wall. Then she follows the dog. The dog barks. She examines another plant on the wall further down. She follows the dog.

SCENE: Dermot's room interior.

Paul is sitting at Dermot's computer. The computer beeps. Paul looks pleased.

CUT TO: Computer screen.

An email message.

"To: Paul Dooley
Re: Development of Leased Land

We are delighted to inform you
we would want to start construction
as soon as possible on the land
you have leased at Bealach na gCapaill."

CUT TO: Room interior.

Paul exclaims: Oh ho ho, yes!

Oonagh sticks her head in the doorway, looks interested.

Paul looks up at Oonagh: Didn't I tell you it was worth leasing that field?

Oonagh enters the room: Go on.

Paul, proudly: Well they only want to go and build on it.

Oonagh, skeptically: Who does?

Paul's excitement gives way to cynicism: What difference does it make?

Oonagh shrugs, defensively: I'm just asking.

Paul: Yeah. You know love...
He stands: Just once...
He holds out both arms, sarcastically: Hey Paul, that's great!
He pushes past Oonagh, mutters: That'd be good.

Oonagh looks after him helplessly.

SCENE: Daytime. Sunny. Hilltop meadow.

Siobhan and the dog are visible very far away making their way through the meadow.

CUT TO: Somewhat closer.

Siobhan and the dog walk past a large rock. Some cannabis plants are waving in the wind. The dog barks several times. Siobhan stops at the stand of cannabis. She looks at the plants. The dog continues to bark urgently (Yeah, that's the stuff, what is it, lady? Can I have some more?)

SCENE: Daytime. Sunny. Hendley's exterior.

Kathleen walks out of the shop, a large cardboard box under her arm. She sets the box down on the top step. She takes out a bouquet of flowers wrapped in plastic and walks over to a row of green plastic buckets next to the shop, ready to put the bouquet into the bucket. She hears a loud drum beat and looks down the street. She frowns and looks down at the bucket next to her.

CUT TO: Bucket.

The surface of the water in the bucket forms rings in response to the beat.

CUT TO: Kathleen.

She frowns even more and watches the bucket.

CUT TO: Bucket.

The bucket starts to vibrate and move.

CUT TO: Kathleen.

She looks up at the window of the shop. We hear the sound of glass tinkling (like bottles falling, not the window breaking). Kathleen looks alarmed, runs back into the shop.

CUT TO: Street.

Liam's truck approaches. Apparently the percussion sounds are coming from it.

The music begins: Sing it with me!

CUT TO: Fitzgerald's interior.

Oonagh is behind the bar. She hears the music. Bottles start rattling on the shelves behind her. She looks around, worried.

CUT TO: Street.

Liam's truck pulls up in front of Hendley's.

CUT TO: Truck interior.

Liam, cap on backwards, is admiring his sound system.

Music: Sing it with me!

CUT TO: Fitzgerald's interior.

Oonagh ducks, cringes, runs out.

CUT TO: Liam's truck exterior.

Liam gets out of the truck, leaves the music blasting. Through the windscreen, Oonagh is visible coming out of Fitzgerald's. She runs over to the truck.

CUT TO: Hendley's exterior.

Liam boogies up the steps. Suddenly, the music stops.

Liam freezes in his tracks, turns around: Who turned that off?

CUT TO: Liam's truck interior.

Oonagh is in the truck cab, self-righteously: I turned it off. Do you think I want the house to fall down?
She climbs back out of the truck, slams the door.

CUT TO: Hendley's exterior.

Liam points at Oonagh: No offense, Missus. But you don't turn down another man's sounds.

Kathleen comes out of the shop, in a huff: And you don't wake the dead either, Liam Cochlan!
She points at her shop: I have carrots falling off the shelves!

Liam: And bouncing back up Kathleen, hah!
He turns and goes back down the steps.

Kathleen waves her finger at Liam: I don't have to listen to this.

CUT TO: Truck interior.

Through the windscreen, we can see Oonagh standing in the street in front of the truck, her hands on her hips, indignantly: None of us has to!

CUT TO: Liam's truck interior.

Liam climbs back into the cab, turns on the music again. He smiles sweetly at Oonagh.

Through the windscreen, we can see that Oonagh's mouth is flapping, but we can't hear her over the music.

CUT TO: Hendley's exterior.

Liam boogies up the steps again. The music stops again. Liam freezes in his tracks again, turns around.

CUT TO: Truck interior.

Frankie is in the cab this time: Turn it down or turn it off. You've been warned.

Oonagh looks smug.

CUT TO: Hendley's exterior.

Liam chews his gum.

CUT TO: Truck interior.

Through the windscreen, we can see Oonagh make a face that says, "See, I told you so, so there!" She turns and walks back toward Fitzgerald's.

CUT TO: Hendley's exterior.

Liam chews his gum, then turns and goes into the shop.

SCENE: Daytime. Sunny. Hilltop.

Siobhan is standing in front of her jeep, holding up some cannabis leaves in a plastic bag, talking into a mobile phone: Well, I'm no botanist, but, I don't think I'm looking at cabbage here.
She listens, then lowers the bag, walks to the driver's door of her jeep: Yeah, I'll send you a sample of course. Kay bye.
She hangs up the phone, opens the driver's door.

SCENE: Curate's kitchen interior.

Fr Vincent is sitting at the table, a newspaper and the phone book on the table in front of him, talking on the phone, dejectedly: No, that's a bit expensive for me. Thanks anyway.
He pushes the "off" button on the phone, puts the phone down on the newspaper. He hears a knock at the door, looks over at the door, gets up.

CUT TO: Door exterior.

The door opens. Fr Mac is standing there, looking grim.

CUT TO: Door interior.

Fr Mac walks in: Before you start Father, I don't want a reprise of this morning.

Fr Vincent watches him enter.

Fr Mac: Have it out with the Bishop. He'll be in touch.

CUT TO: Living room interior.

Fr Mac: He didn't hear it from me.

Fr Vincent acknowledges this, politely: What can I do for you, Father?

Fr Mac: I've found you somewhere to live.

Fr Vincent: Oh?

Fr Mac, rudely: You're welcome.

Fr Vincent, sincerely: Thank you, Father.

Fr Mac, grudgingly: It's temporary.
He admits: Rent's a bit steep, but...
He walks toward the door: It's a roof over your head.
He stops: Oh before I forget. I'm...under strength at Cilldargan this week, I'll need your help with confessions on Thursday.

Fr Vincent: Uh sure, um...and, you were saying?

Fr Mac, with relish: Oh. Kathleen Hendley's.

Fr Vincent is struck dumb.

Fr Mac gloats: I know. It's too perfect, isn't it.
He turns to leave, a look of schadenfreude on his face.

SCENE: Daytime. Overcast. Bealach na gCapaill.

Wide shot of the field with the Mass rock. Down at the road, two cars are parked and two figures are visible walking up the hill toward the rock.

(Here my husband accidentally recorded 30 seconds of a German TV documentary about some whaling thing. When we return, Paul is talking to the two men who want to develop the land. They have apparently told him they want to build a rubbish dump there. Note: According to the credits, the two men are named Henry Carr and Jonno Jackson, but they are never called by name in the episode.)

Paul looks pained: I'll have to think about it.
He turns away and starts back down the hillside.

The two men exchange a look. One of them admonishes Paul: Don't take too long.

Paul stops, turns toward them, then continues down the hill. The men look at each other and shake their heads.

SCENE: Daytime. Overcast. House exterior.

Dr. Ryan is standing at the back of his car, which is parked outside a house in the country. He opens the rear door, takes out his doctor's bag, and closes the rear door. He walks toward the house. He opens the door to the porch and calls out: Shelagh?
He closes the door behind himself.

CUT TO: House interior.

Dr. Ryan is fiddling with some medicine bottles. He drops one into his doctor's bag and keeps the other one in his hand. A woman enters, carrying a tray with tea.

Dr. Ryan admonishes her: Oh Shelagh. I wish you'd let me.
He takes the tray from her.

Shelagh, gently: Michael. Stop fussing.
She walks past him, orders: And just pour.
She takes a seat.

Dr. Ryan puts the tray down in front of her.

Shelagh: Oh yeah and er...if you could give me something for the um...
She raises her eyebrows at him as if to say, whispers: You know.

Dr. Ryan sits down opposite her, leans forward: It's all right to say the word 'pain'. It doesn't make you one.

Shelagh looks away, dismissively: Och, I'd just sound like a moaner.

Dr. Ryan picks up the teapot, pours a cup: What do you expect Shelagh. You have something to moan about.

Shelagh turns her head toward him, fixes him with a glare.

Dr. Ryan pours a second cup: Not that you ever do. Here.
He reaches across the tea tray and puts the bottle of medicine down on the table next to Shelagh.

Shelagh picks up the bottle and looks at it. She looks balefully at Dr. Ryan, who pours a third cup of tea (actually he pours the first cup again).

Dr. Ryan: Well let's see how you get on.

Shelagh closes her eyes and turns away, disappointed.

CUT TO: House exterior.

Dr. Ryan exits through the porch, closes the door behind himself. Frankie pulls up in her police car. Dr. Ryan walks right past her car without even acknowledging it. He walks over to his car, opens the rear door, and puts in his jacket and bag. Now he looks at the police car.

Dr. Ryan, friendly: Frankie, how's it going.

Frankie smiles at Dr. Ryan, walks around her car: Never mind me. How's Shelagh?

Dr. Ryan: Oh, good form. He jokes: Better than I'd be.
He walks toward the driver's door.

Frankie: Anything she needs? Anything I can get her?

Dr. Ryan pauses at his car door, looks at Frankie: Well, company. Just...just keep dropping in.

Frankie smiles, looks down: Sure I would, wouldn't I?
She walks toward the house door.

Dr. Ryan smiles at her, watches her go. Then his smile fades and he gets into his car, closes the door.

SCENE: Fitzgerald's kitchen.

Oonagh is serving the family dinner. Paul is pacing around the kitchen.

Paul: Oonagh, we could make a fortune.
He leans his hands on the back of a chair.

Oonagh, skeptically: Out of a rubbish dump?

Grainne and Dermot enter, take seats at the table and dig in.

Paul: And what else?

Oonagh, condescendingly: How? We get first dabs on broken fridges? We'd be pariahs. Paul what are you thinking?

Grainne asks Paul: What's a pariah?

Dermot: Now you can sing and pray in Kerry. (??)

Oonagh and Paul both glare at Dermot.

Oonagh: Don't mind him.
She picks up a tray, walks around the table behind Paul, pauses to lean over and tell him: Paul, don't do this.

Paul scoffs. Oonagh walks out into the pub.

SCENE: Bishop's residence foyer interior.

Camera above looking down into the foyer. Fr Vincent is waiting. A door opens. A woman who looks like she might be a secretary comes out of the door. Fr Vincent looks at her expectantly, but she walks right past him and through another doorway. Fr Vincent looks awkward.

Then a voice from above says: Father!

Fr Vincent looks up.

CUT TO: Stairway.

The bishop is standing on the stairs: Father Sheahan.

CUT TO: Foyer.

Fr Vincent looks up at the bishop, then back toward the door where the woman went. The women closes the door carefully.

CUT TO: Bishop's office interior.

The bishop is standing behind his chair, slams his hand down on the back of the chair: For God's sake! You must know your friends aren't married!

Fr Vincent is standing stiffly before the desk, both hands behind his back, stony-faced.

The bishop walks toward the window: No matter what nonsense you performed up on that...rock.
He points vaguely out the window.

Fr Vincent, firmly: It wasn't nonsense.

Bishop: Well whatever it was.
He walks back behind his chair, shouts: The church won't recognize it. Because he was divorced. He stands next to a large crucifix, whirls around to face Fr Vincent again.

Fr Vincent, calmly: It was what they wanted.

Bishop: What they wanted. What THEY wanted? What about what the church wanted?
He cocks his head to one side: What about what Father MacAnally wanted?

Fr Vincent attempts to answer: Well--

The bishop blusters: Don't interrupt me when I'm talking to you!
He spits out: My God I'll have your respect! Even if your parish priest doesn't.

Fr Vincent: That's not true. Of course he does.

The bishop takes a couple of steps closer to Fr Vincent: Are you in a hurry to go home, Father?

Fr Vincent, cowed: No Bishop.

Bishop: Because you can take it from me. Any more of this renegade behavior...and you'll be back on the next boat back to Van Dieman's Land.
He turns to the window again.

Fr Vincent, quietly: That's...Tasmania.

The bishop snaps his head around, demands: What?

Fr Vincent, simply: I'm from Broken Hill.

Bishop, haughtily: Wherever you're from, next time you come...take your humble pills.

Fr Vincent, humbly: Yes Bishop.
He blinks and looks slowly down.

SCENE: Fitzgerald's interior.

Oonagh is serving Siobhan and Louis, who are sitting at a side table. Brendan, Frankie, Liam, Donal, and Edso are at the bar. Paul is behind the bar, trying to ignore everyone.

Siobhan: Now Louis. Is that all right for you?

Louis: Oh grand ??

Oonagh walks back behind the bar: You can't be sure about that, Brendan.

Edso: It's what I heard too.

Frankie: And did they say where they were going to put this dump?

Brendan shakes his head: Somewhere close is all I heard.

Donal: Like the noise pollution.

Liam: Give over you will ya?

Frankie leans around Liam: ??

Paul puts a glass of stout in front of Edso.

Oonagh, looking at Paul: Sure wouldn't you need a planning commission for something like that? A rubbish dump.

Brendan: Ah...I'd say there'd be an exchange of brown envelopes. Wouldn't you Paul?

Paul looks around as if he hasn't been paying attention: Huh? Ah, tsch, well yeah.
He smiles at Edso, then turns and slowly exits the room.

CUT TO: Side table.

Siobhan, quietly: No, Louis, what I'm telling you is, your dog is stoned.

Louis looks surprised, then frowns: The dog she's...she's what?

Siobhan: Wasted. Couldn't see through a ladder.

Louis: What?

Siobhan: I think she's been chewing on...
She looks around to make sure nobody else is listening, turns back to Louis, whispers: On a cannabis plant. But I'll know as soon as the plant is analyzed.

Louis, desperately: Pluto! Well will-- will she be all right?

Siobhan pushes her chair back and stands up, straight-faced: Well she might develop a taste for Jefferson Airplane, but apart from that she'll be fine.

Louis looks down and then back at Siobhan, confused.

CUT TO: Hotel entrance.

Fr Vincent enters.

CUT TO: Bar.

Brendan: Oh Vincent. Does Kathleen know you're out?

CUT TO: Hotel entrance.

Fr Vincent closes the door, strides over to the bar, mutters: Yeah yeah yeah.

CUT TO: Bar.

Everyone looks at Fr Vincent sympathetically.

Fr Vincent steps up to the bar next to Edso: Paul, get me a coffee, will ya?

Paul: Yeah sure.
He turns to the espresso machine, takes down a cup.

Brendan: You would have thought they could've found you a room at your own place you know.

Oonagh, in jest: No I think we'd have driven him mad.

Louis laughs, holds up his stout: Just like like like my Pluto.

Brendan: What?

Siobhan nudges him to be quiet.

CUT TO: Hotel entrance.

The door opens. Kathleen enters with a sour expression on her face.

Brendan: Oh my God.

CUT TO: Bar.

Brendan nods toward Kathleen. Everyone turns to look. Fr Vincent is the last one to look.

CUT TO: Kathleen.

Kathleen smiles at Fr Vincent: Your supper's ready Father.

CUT TO: Bar.

Everybody snickers and looks at Fr Vincent. He bravely holds up his cup of coffee, smiles at Kathleen. He sets his coffee cup down and slowly walks over to Kathleen. Everyone snickers some more.

CUT TO: Hotel entrance.

Kathleen waits for Fr Vincent, then smiles in a satisfied manner and walks out the door. Fr Vincent follows her as far as the door, then pauses and looks back at the bar with the expression of a condemned man.

CUT TO: Bar.

Everyone is trying not to burst out laughing.

CUT TO: Hotel entrance.

Fr Vincent exits, closes the door behind himself.

CUT TO: Night. Fitzgerald's exterior.

Kathleen and Fr Vincent are walking away from the pub. They can hear the guffaws coming from inside. Fr Vincent looks back toward the pub.

Kathleen looks straight ahead, self-assured: Don't mind them Father.

Fr Vincent follows her.

SCENE: Night. Kathleen's house exterior.

Wide shot of Kathleen's rear garden. Kathleen comes out of the house into the garden. Fr Vincent follows her.

CUT TO: Kathleen's garden.

Kathleen and Fr Vincent are standing in the garden.

Fr Vincent looks around: Ah. Beautiful. He steps to the fence and looks over it.

Kathleen, pleased, walks away toward the side of the garden, where the table is: Would you like a chilly?
She goes over to the barbecue.

Fr Vincent, politely: Scuse me?
He walks over to the table behind Kathleen.

Kathleen announces: I've some of the amber nectar in the fridge. Ice cold.

Fr Vincent demurs: No thanks, Kathleen, a soft drink'll be fine.

Kathleen picks up a plate, starts picking up items from the barbecue.

Fr Vincent indicates the table: This is um...quite a spread.

Kathleen: Sit down Father. Help yourself to some salads.
She places a huge prawn onto the plate: I tried to make this authentic. Prawns on the barby.

Fr Vincent sits down, shakes his head in bemusement: Sounds good to me.
He looks at Kathleen: Can I do something?

Kathleen: Eat is what you can do.
She brings the plate over to him: And don't be throwing any of this out.

Fr Vincent: No worries.

Kathleen puts the plate down in front of Fr Vincent.

Fr Vincent is impressed: Oh ho. Would you look at that.
He picks up a prawn and turns it around, holds it up to Kathleen, claws out, laughs.

Kathleen giggles: They'll eat nothing else the neighbors.
She hurries away toward the barbecue.

SCENE: Fr Mac's kitchen interior.

Fr Mac is standing at his kitchen table, pouring a can of beans into a pan. He shakes the can several times and peers into it to make sure it is empty. He puts the can down and picks up the pan, walks over to the stove. He puts the pan onto the stove and turns on the burner. He hears a knock. He looks around, picks up his cane from where it is leaning nearby, and slowly makes his way to the front door.

CUT TO: Priest's door exterior.

The door opens. Fr Mac peers out.

The bishop is standing outside the door.

Fr Mac exclaims in surprise: Your Lordship!
He tries to hide his cane behind his back.

Bishop: I-- I'm sorry Father. Is this a bad time?

Fr Mac, quickly: Of course not no come in please please.
He waves his hand for the bishop to enter: Come in.
He stands aside so the bishop can enter.

Bishop: Thank you.

Fr Mac closes the door.

SCENE: Fr Mac's kitchen interior.

Fr Mac and the bishop are standing next to the kitchen table. The bishop is pouring milk into a tea cup. Fr Mac is spooning the beans out of the pan onto a plate. He walks over to the stove to put the pan down. The bishop watches him, then returns his attention to his tea.

Bishop: So. He pours milk into a second tea cup.

Fr Mac comes back to the table.

Bishop: How've things been going, Frank?
He puts the milk pitcher down and picks up the tea pot.

Fr Mac, stiffly: Oh fine, thank you your Lordship.
He sits down.

The bishop pours tea into both cups: I was...worried about you.

Fr Mac: No need to worry about me.

The bishop takes a seat: Well you've been under a lot of pressure lately.

Fr Mac: Oh I'm sure high office has its share.

The bishop acknowledges this with a smile, looks at Fr Mac's plate: Your beans are getting cold.

Fr Mac looks down at them, nods: They'll be fine.

The bishop licks his lips, raises the tea cup to his mouth: I saw Father Sheahan.
He takes a sip.

Fr Mac, disinterestedly: Oh yes?

Bishop, pleased with himself: Kicked his caboose from here to Saturday.
He smiles, then looks at Fr Mac and his smile disappears.

Fr Mac fixes the bishop with a baleful stare.

Bishop, lamely: Well I thought you'd...want to know.
He looks down, licks his lips, inquires offhandedly: How long have you been here in Cilldargan, Father?
He takes a sip of tea.

Fr Mac, dryly: I was born here.

The bishop puts down his cup, smiles: Parish priest.

Fr Mac looks around, shrugs: Twenty years?

Bishop, briskly: Twenty-eight.

Fr Mac, cynically: Is that right.

The bishop nods.

Fr Mac, cynically: We're not talking about a long service medal here, are we your lordship?

The bishop chuckles, embarrassed: Frank, Frank. He looks up: Well.
He looks at Fr Mac: Not as such.

Fr Mac, cynically: More a carriage club perhaps.

The bishop looks down, seriously: Father. No one is...
He clears his throat, looks at Fr Mac: What would you like? More time? Just to breathe the air, smell the roses? I'm only asking you...to think about it.

Fr Mac, harshly: Your tea's getting cold.

The bishop picks up his cup and takes a sip. Fr Mac purses his lips and looks away.

SCENE: Night. Kathleen's house exterior.

Wide shot of Kathleen's rear garden. She and Fr Vincent are sitting at the table. The garden overlooks the river.

Fr Vincent: Remind me to thank Father Mac.

CUT TO: Garden.

Kathleen looks at Fr Vincent blankly.

Fr Vincent gestures around: Providing me this billing.

Kathleen acknowledges the compliment: Your dignity matters to him.

Fr Vincent: The dignity of my suit, Kathleen.

Kathleen: He'd say your calling.

Fr Vincent considers this: What would you say?

Kathleen looks down, considers a while, then looks at Fr Vincent, seriously: I'd say you were wrong.

Fr Vincent: What?

Kathleen: I presume we're talking about this wedding up at Bealach na gCapaill.

Fr Vincent slowly nods: Yes.

Kathleen: If...I understand it correctly, Father, you married your friends, when they weren't free to marry.

Fr Vincent: According to the church.

Kathleen: You are the church.

Fr Vincent looks down. He has no smart answer.

Kathleen tries another tact: OK Father. Let me ask you this. Would you have defied your parish priest for a pair of complete strangers?

Fr Vincent stares steadily at Kathleen.

Kathleen: You did a favor for a friend, Father. Which is a fine thing to do. But I'd say we're some distance from a moral principle.

Fr Vincent continues to stare at Kathleen.

SCENE: Fr Mac's office interior.

Fr Mac has a glass of whiskey on the desk in front of him. He picks up the glass and slowly takes a long sip. He swallows and licks his lips. He looks like he is deep in thought.

SCENE: BallyK church exterior.

Fr Vincent, in Mass vestments, is greeting parishioners as they leave. He shakes hands with a woman. Another woman approaches.

Fr Vincent takes her hand: Margaret. How's that Zachary?

The woman walks away.

Kathleen approaches.

Fr Vincent takes Kathleen's hand: Kathleen.

Kathleen: Very nice, Father.

Fr Vincent murmurs: Thank you. Thank you for coming.

Kathleen turns and walks away.

Brendan and Siobhan approach, Siobhan carrying Aisling.

Brendan shakes Vincent's hand: Very enjoyable. Lovely lovely.

Fr Vincent shakes Brendan's hand: Brendan.

Siobhan smiles: Father. It was a great one.

Fr Vincent pats Siobhan on the arm: Yeah thanks OK.

Brendan and Siobhan walk away. Frankie walks up to them, accuses Siobhan: I've just come back from Louis's place. Is it true you found cannabis growing wild up there?

Brendan deadpans: It wasn't a bad trip, was it Frankie?

Frankie gives Brendan a look that says, "I am not amused," turns to Siobhan, demands: Well?

Siobhan: Frankie, I don't like your tone. I don't know what it was I found growing up there, but that's why I've sent it off for analysis.

Frankie: But that's what you think it is?

Siobhan, reasonably: That's what I think it might be.

Frankie orders: Show me.

Brendan protests: Frankie--

Frankie insists: Show me.

Siobhan hands Aisling to Brendan: OK darling. Here you go.

Brendan takes Aisling: All right.

Siobhan, annoyed: Double time on a Sunday is it Frankie?
She walks quickly past Frankie.

Frankie looks at Brendan. He gives her the peace sign. Frankie gives him a look that says, "Very funny."

Fr Vincent walks up to Brendan, curious: What was that all about?

Brendan: I've no idea. He looks after Frankie: I think Frankie's onto red meat again.

Fr Vincent chuckles.

Brendan looks in the direction Frankie and Siobhan left: There you go.

Fr Vincent looks where Brendan is looking.

CUT TO: Sidewalk.

Kathleen is standing with the two other women whom Fr Vincent greeted earlier. Kathleen turns to look at Fr Vincent. She waves to him.

CUT TO: Fr Vincent and Brendan.

Fr Vincent smiles and waves back at Kathleen, says through his teeth to Brendan: Oh God.

Brendan: Oh it's not that bad is it?

Fr Vincent, pained: Brendan, she sees into my soul.

Brendan chuckles: You can't stay there.

Fr Vincent squints.

Brendan suggests: Why don't you stay at my place?

Fr Vincent looks at Brendan.

Brendan: Well for tonight anyway.

Fr Vincent, ruefully: And what do I tell Kathleen.
He nods and smiles at her again.

Brendan: Tell her that er...tell her it wouldn't be fair to spend all your time with one of your parishioners.

Fr Vincent sounds interested: Ah hah?

Brendan: Mm-hm. Tell her that you need to spread yourself around a bit. Like a mendicant monk.

Fr Vincent: You mean a bum.

Brendan: Who puts food on your table anyway?
He smiles and walks away with Aisling on his arm.

Fr Vincent watches him go.

CUT TO: Sidewalk.

Kathleen is still watching Fr Vincent. She indicates her watch and mouths the word "lunch."

CUT TO: Fr Vincent.

Fr Vincent plucks at his vestments and indicates that he needs to go inside and get changed.

CUT TO: Sidewalk.

Kathleen indicates she understands and turns back to the other two women.

SCENE: Daytime. Sunny. Cannabis plants.

Frankie is rummaging around among the plants. Siobhan is standing behind her.

Siobhan, condescendingly: Think you have to dry it first before it bites you.

Frankie, indignantly: I have seen this stuff before.
She pulls out a plastic bag.

Siobhan: You've never seen it here before.

Frankie: No. But it's hardly indigenous, is it.
She takes a clipping and catches it in the plastic bag: Someone's looking out for it.

Siobhan, amused: That'd be Pluto.
She turns and leaves.

Frankie: What?
She looks around, confused.

SCENE: Brendan's house interior.

Fr Vincent, wearing a dark blue button-down shirt and pale blue jeans, is bouncing Aisling on his arm. Brendan comes down the hall, tying his tie.

Fr Vincent: You didn't tell me you needed a babysitter.

Brendan: Vincent, what do you think a mendicant monk does. Sings for his supper. He adjusts his tie.

Fr Vincent looks at Aisling: I don't think my singing's gonna help you get to sleep.

Siobhan enters the room. Brendan doesn't see her.

Brendan: Well you can always give her what Siobhan found at the mountain.
He turns around, sees Siobhan, laughs.

Siobhan, to Fr Vincent: Don't mind him.
She takes Aisling from Fr Vincent: Come on darling. That's the girl now.
She walks out of the room carrying Aisling on her arm.

Brendan calls after them: Sleep well!

Fr Vincent whispers to Brendan: What if she wakes up?

Brendan jokes: She can tell you a story.
He laughs, walks out the door.

Fr Vincent looks slightly disgusted, scratches the back of his head.

SCENE: Brendan's living room interior.

Fr Vincent is kneeling next to the record player putting on an LP. He waves his hands over it, waits expectantly. The record drops down onto the turntable. The needle lowers itself. Fr Vincent looks enthralled. The music starts ("Go Ask Alice" by Jefferson Airplane). Fr Vincent stands up and walks over to the sofa. He sits down on the sofa and looks around, rubbing his knees. A fire is burning in the fireplace. He looks at the books on the coffee table and picks one up, a paperback. He looks vaguely interested. He hears a knocking sound, looks around to see where it might be coming from. He gets up and goes to the door.

CUT TO: Door interior.

Fr Vincent unlatches the door and opens it. Avril is standing there. They both muster each other from head to toe.

Avril holds up a bottle of wine, apologetically: This isn't...what it looks like.

Fr Vincent bites the inside of his lips, waits for her to continue.

Avril explains, embarrassed: It's for Siobhan? But she wasn't at home.

Fr Vincent points at something behind Avril: Oh she's uh...she's gone out with Brendan.

Avril closes her eyes, nods, wishes she could sink into the ground: Oh. I see. OK.

Fr Vincent seizes the moment, gestures over his shoulder with his thumb, hopefully: Will you come in?

Avril hesitates: Oh. Well, I don't know.
She looks past Fr Vincent into the interior of the house.

Fr Vincent looks at her expectantly.

Avril narrows her eyes, suspiciously: Is that...Jefferson Airplane?

Fr Vincent shrugs, tries to deny it: Not necessarily.

Avril looks intrigued, steps in: It is, isn't it?

Fr Vincent backs up flat against the door, holds his hands up against his chest (to avoid touching her?).

Avril gives him a look that says, "We'll just have to see about this," and walks into the house.

Fr Vincent stands at the door and watches her.

CUT TO: Kitchen interior.

Avril and Fr Vincent are sitting at the table, looking bored and watching the wine bottle stand in the middle of the table. Now the music is, "Don't you want somebody to love, don't you need somebody to love, don't you love somebody to love..."

Fr Vincent, dreamily: Wine ever do it for you?

Avril readily admits: Sure. It came by the vineyard.
She looks at Fr Vincent, asks: You?

Fr Vincent wrinkles his nose, looks at the bottle: No. Whiskey and beer. Maybe vodka. Gin. Tequila.

Avril smiles slightly at Fr Vincent.

Fr Vincent: Brandy.

Avril, dryly: Very discriminating, though.

Fr Vincent smiles, too. He hears the coffee maker steaming. He turns to look at it, then turns back to Avril, raises his eyebrows, without enthusiasm: Mm. Coffee.

CUT TO: Living room.

Avril is pouring the coffee into two mugs: Were you always a priest?

Fr Vincent is lying on the sofa, watching Avril: You mean before I was human?

Avril gives him a wise look, continues pouring the coffee.

Fr Vincent, amused: Yeah, mostly.

Avril presses her lips together, puts down the coffee pot, leans her head against her hand, nonchalantly: Ever been tempted?

Fr Vincent: Scuse me?

Avril holds up her hand, palm out: Fair question.

Fr Vincent frowns, looks down at the sofa, pats it, as if the subject made him uncomfortable: Course I have.

Avril rests her head on her hand again, nosily: And?

Fr Vincent: And what.

Avril: Well what happened?

Fr Vincent: What do you mean what happened? Think it only happened once?

Avril puts her hand down, shakes her head so that her hair falls across her face, coquettishly: Well what happens, when it happens?

Fr Vincent thinks she should mind her own business: Avril...

Avril presses forward: No, I want to know, what you do. What strategy do you employ?

Fr Vincent: To do what.

Avril: You know what. To...get out of a situation.
Meaningfully: To kill passion.

Fr Vincent pauses, looks down, looks back at Avril, deadpans: Well there's always alcohol.

Avril points at him: That's cheating. That was years ago.

Fr Vincent points at her: I've never been tempted since.

Avril looks sly, moves over to sit on the couch next to him, leans her head back, looks up at the ceiling: I think...Frankie fancies you.

Fr Vincent rests his head on his hand, frowns: What?

Avril turns her head to look at Fr Vincent, shrugs: Hey. What do I know.

Fr Vincent squirms: Avril...

Avril, innocently: Don't you think--?

Fr Vincent: No.

Avril, slyly: There you go then. Shows what I know.
She leans her head back again and closes her eyes.

Fr Vincent fluffs up the cushion, rests his head against it, closes his eyes.

They are both silent for a moment.

Fr Vincent, eyes closed: So what do you do?

Avril, eyes closed: Hm?

Fr Vincent, eyes closed: To get out of a situation.

Avril inclines her head toward Fr Vincent slightly, eyes closed, amused: What do I do? I just...walk away.

Fr Vincent opens his eyes a crack, lifts his head slightly to look at Avril, snorts softly in amusement, puts his head back down on the cushion and closes his eyes.

SCENE: Fitzgerald's interior.

Paul is serving Frankie at a side table. Louis is sitting at another table.

Paul: Well, you'll have to do something Frankie. The pointing cement's going off the walls.
He walks away.

As Paul passes Louis, Louis holds up his glass: What about poor Pluto! She's off her food.

Paul walks behind the bar. Brendan, Siobhan, and Donal are at the bar.

Siobhan jokes to Brendan: Proper case(??)

Brendan leans around behind Siobhan to ask Louis: Is your dog into gangsta rap now Louis is he?

From outside, we can hear a very loud percussion beat. Suddenly, the bottles behind the bar start shaking violently. Oonagh and Paul jump to hold them up.

Oonagh: Oh!

Donal grabs his bottle before it jumps off the bar.

Louis squints his eyes shut, holds up his hand. Frankie looks disgusted. The music stops. Donal puts his bottle back down.

CUT TO: Hotel entrance.

Liam enters, wearing sunglasses and a white windbreaker with hood. He does a dance step, then closes the door behind himself.

CUT TO: Bar.

Everyone looks at Liam. They don't know what to think.

CUT TO: Liam.

He saunters toward the bar, assured of his coolness.

CUT TO: Bar.

Paul: Come Donal. It's your guardian angel.

Donal frowns at Paul.

Liam passes Frankie, points at her.

Donal: Liam? Who are you supposed to be?

Oonagh: Big daddy.

Liam stands at the bar next to Donal: That's "Puff" Daddy.

Oonagh and Paul smirk at each other.

Liam: And I'm not supposed to be anybody.

Paul and Oonagh repress their smiles.

Brendan frowns sternly at Liam. Siobhan tries not to burst out laughing. Donal looks at Liam's shoes. Louis looks confused. Frankie smiles at Liam in a superior way.

Liam, indignantly: What are you all staring at then? God just cause everyone around here is still wearing flared trousers from the 1970's. Oonagh give us a pint.

Oonagh bends over.

Siobhan, conversationally, to Brendan: You still have a pair, don't you?
She explains to the others: He goes fishing in them sometimes. Can trap a shoal of fish in one leg. Isn't that right.
She turned to Brendan, tries to supress a smile.

Brendan looks maltreated. He turns to Oonagh: We'll go to our table now Oonagh.

Oonagh: Of course. She assures him: The fish is very good tonight.

Siobhan smiles to herself.

Liam looks at Donal, who is still looking at Liam's outfit. Liam jumps at him suddenly: Chill out!

SCENE: Brendan's living room interior.

The fire has died down, leaving only embers in the fireplace. Fr Vincent is lying on his back on the sofa, reading a book. He lifts his head slightly to look at the other end of the sofa, where Avril is lying, asleep. He looks reassured, settles back down to his book.

CUT TO: Door interior.

The door unlatches and opens.

CUT TO: Living room.

Fr Vincent hears the door opening, looks up.

CUT TO: Door interior.

Brendan and Siobhan enter. Brendan closes the door. Siobhan stops in her tracks when she sees the scene before her. Brendan joins her, also looks dumbfounded.
(But why, since they can't see Avril and Fr Vincent yet?)

CUT TO: Living room.

Fr Vincent tries to sit up a little, but can't because Avril is lying there. He looks at Avril, clears his throat: Um...

The living room door opens, Brendan walks in. Siobhan walks in behind him. They both look mutely shocked. They look at each other.

Fr Vincent smiles at them nervously from his position on the sofa.

Brendan: What is it about priests in this town?

Avril wakes up, sees Brendan and Siobhan, shocked: Brendan!
She sits up, whispers: Oh God!
Her eyes fall on the clock over the mantelpiece: Is that the time?

Fr Vincent makes a noncommittal gesture with his hand: Hm.

Avril turns to Brendan and Siobhan.

Brendan, pointedly: Will I call you a horse?

Avril hisses at Fr Vincent: Why didn't you wake me?

Fr Vincent makes a face at Avril that says, "It isn't my fault."

Siobhan: Would you like me to drive you home?

Avril: Er...no. She grabs her jacket from the back of the sofa, gets up: Erm...Siobhan, I left your bottle of wine in the kitchen.
She walks out of the room between Siobhan and Brendan, gives Fr Vincent a parting look.

Siobhan follows Avril. Brendan stays in the doorway, puts his hands in his pockets and looks at Fr Vincent, raises one eyebrow at him.

Fr Vincent looks at him in a way that says, "I've done nothing wrong," innocently: What?

Brendan cocks his head slightly to one side, continues to watch Fr Vincent.

Fr Vincent sinks down slightly on the sofa, turns his attention to his book again.

SCENE: Daytime. Sunny. Country road.

Fr Mac is walking along a street.

CUT TO: Church exterior.

Fr Mac walks toward a church.

CUT TO: Church interior.

Fr Mac is kneeling in a pew, praying.

Bucky bustles in, pauses to cross himself before a crucifix, turns to go down the aisle. Fr Mac looks up and sees him.

Bucky stops and looks over at Fr Mac, surprised: Frank.

Fr Mac greets him: Bucky.

Bucky walks over to him.

Fr Mac remains kneeling: Don't mind me, I was just passing.

Bucky: Are you sure?

Fr Mac: Yes, nothing urgent. I can see you want to be getting on.

Bucky looks at the large book under his arm: Oh yeah it's for poor old Paulie O'Driscoll up at Burran's Cross. Oh it's not looking so good.

Fr Mac, sincerely: Sorry to hear that.

Bucky: You look...tired, Frank.

Fr Mac jokes: Ah...better shape than Paulie, I'd say.

Bucky chuckles: Yeah. Yeah. Am I seeing you tomorrow?

Fr Mac, quickly: Oh yes. Of course yes. Please, go on.

Bucky walks away, pulls his hat on. Fr Mac resumes his thoughts.

SCENE: Garda station interior.

Fr Vincent is standing in the doorway, wearing a black T-shirt, blue jeans, a black leather jacket, and carrying a rucksack.

Frankie is packing a bag with some supplies: Sorry Father. You must think me a terrible host. But the work you know.

Fr Vincent, understandingly: Oh you're already doing plenty.

Frankie: Not a problem. She closes the bag, puts it over her shoulder, takes her hat down from the hatrack: Anyway. There's a bed made up, and some cold ham in the fridge.
She walks past Fr Vincent out the door: I'll try and get back before sunup.
She looks both ways, then crosses the street to her police car.

Fr Vincent steps in, looks around.

CUT TO: Cell exterior.

The door to the jail cell is open. Inside is a bed and a dresser with a lamp on it. Fr Vincent stops in the doorway to the cell, looks around, decides to enter.

CUT TO: Cell interior.

Fr Vincent enters the jail cell. He looks at the heavy metal door and the bars on the window.

SCENE: Night. Binocular shot.

Shot of the hilltop where the cannabis is growing as seen through binoculars.

CUT TO: Meadow.

Frankie is standing next to a rock, holding the binoculars to her eyes. She lowers the binoculars. She leans down and picks up a large plastic bag. She shakes the contents out. It seems to be a sleeping bag or blankets.

CUT TO: Cell exterior.

Shot through the open cell door of Fr Vincent, lying down on the bed. He is using a blue sleeping bag. He looks up at the lamp next to him, which is still on. He reaches one hand out of the sleeping bag and turns the light off. He puts his hand back inside the sleeping bag.

CUT TO: Meadow.

Frankie is unscrewing a thermos bottle. She pours herself a cup of coffee. She has a cigarette burning in one hand. She raises the cup to her mouth and is about to take a sip when she sees something. She puts the cup down on the ground and drops the cigarette into it. She picks up a night vision scope and holds it to her eye.

CUT TO: Night vision shot.

Through the night vision scope we see someone walking down the slope opposite, carrying a flashlight.

CUT TO: Frankie.

Frankie picks up her flashlight, stands up, and takes up the pursuit.

CUT TO: Cannabis stand.

The unknown person puts their flashlight down on the ground next to the cannabis. Frankie approaches from behind, turns off her flashlight. The unknown person kneels next to the cannabis, readies a plastic bag. Frankie runs up and jumps on the person with a shriek, brandishing a night stick. The two of them wrestle on the ground, both yelling.

Person: OK, OK, OK!

They both sit up. The person is Dr. Ryan.

Dr. Ryan, upset: Frankie! Are you trying to give me a coronary!

Frankie, holding the night stick up over her head: Doc!

Dr. Ryan: And put that stick away!

Frankie lowers the stick.

Dr. Ryan sinks down back onto the ground, moans: Ohhh!

Frankie is breathing hard.

SCENE: Cell interior.

Fr Vincent is sound asleep on his stomach. He hears a sound and stirs: Huh?

CUT TO: Outer door.

The door from outside opens. Frankie walks in and turns on the light. Dr. Ryan is right behind her.

CUT TO: Cell.

The light falls into Fr Vincent's face. He moves.

CUT TO: Office interior.

Frankie walks into her office, turns on the light, takes off her hat.

CUT TO: Cell.

Even more light falls on Fr Vincent. He picks up the pillow and pulls it over his head.

CUT TO: Office.

Dr. Ryan leans against the door frame: Good evening, Father.

CUT TO: Cell.

Fr Vincent struggles to raise his head: Eh?
He looks out the door: Doc?
His head drops back down, then he raises it again: Am I all right?

CUT TO: Office.

Frankie: Sorry Father. I double booked you.

Dr. Ryan, annoyed: Oh Frankie, would you stop.

Frankie: I'm serious Father. Police business. I'm sure Fitzgerald's can find you a bed.

CUT TO: Cell.

Fr Vincent gets up.

CUT TO: Office.

Dr. Ryan points at the cell, indignantly: I'm not going in there!

Frankie: I need the office.

CUT TO: Cell door.

Fr Vincent hides behind the cell door, peers around it: You in trouble Doc?

CUT TO: Office.

Dr. Ryan shakes his head.

CUT TO: Cell door.

Fr Vincent: Want me to call a lawyer?

CUT TO: Office.

Frankie: Good bye, Father.

CUT TO: Cell door.

Fr Vincent disappears behind the cell door.

CUT TO: Office.

Dr. Ryan walks all the way into the office, stands in front of Frankie's desk.

SCENE: Night. Street in front of the garda station.

Fr Vincent backs out of the station, carrying the blue sleeping bag in one arm and his backpack and leather jacket in the other. He turns around to face the street and looks up and down it.

CUT TO: Frankie's office interior.

All the lights are out except for one desk lamp. Frankie is seated behind the desk, Dr. Ryan in front of it.

Frankie places a packet of cigarettes in front of Dr. Ryan: Smoke?

Dr. Ryan: I'm a doctor.

Frankie, sarcastically: Oh, right. Dr. Hook, is it?

Dr. Ryan: What?

Frankie leans back in her chair: Doc, are you aware of the penalties for growing illegal drugs?

Dr. Ryan: I'm sure they're fairly stringent, Frankie.

Frankie, darkly: Guard Sullivan.

Dr. Ryan gives back: Doctor Ryan. And I don't grow illegal drugs.

Frankie plays innocent: Oh they do it on their own, do they?

Dr. Ryan: That's often the way with plants, Frankie.

Frankie sighs, leans forward across the desk: You've got to give me something here Michael, you weren't up there by accident.

Dr. Ryan blinks, looks down and away, admits: No. A patient told me about it. You know, the...stuff.

Frankie: And why would he do that?

Dr. Ryan: We were discussing the work that's been done, research, the...palliative effects of cannabis.

Frankie: The what?

Dr. Ryan: Palliative. Pain-relief.

Frankie, unsympathetically: Oh you in pain, Michael?

Dr. Ryan: It's not funny. You know you wouldn't joke about it if you'd suffered the kind of pain we're talking about here.

Frankie: You're prescribing this stuff, are you?

Dr. Ryan fixes Frankie with a hard stare.

Frankie: Well?

Dr. Ryan gives in: I need a lawyer.

Frankie nods, leans back in her chair, seriously: You can say that again.

SCENE: Night. Meadow.

Fr Vincent walks in a grassy meadow next to some trees. He drops his backpack and the sleeping bag onto the ground.

CUT TO: Somewhat later.

Fr Vincent lies down in his sleeping bag, sighs, satisfied: Ahhhh.
He snuggles down in the sleeping bag, sighs again.

SCENE: Morning. Sunny. Meadow.

Fr Vincent wakes up. The sun is shining brightly in his face. He hears a distant rumble. He looks up. A horse jumps right over him. He gasps, pulls the sleeping bag tightly over his head. A second horse jumps over him, then a third. They gallop away. Fr Vincent peers out, looks around. He sits up slowly. A horse pokes its nose into his face. Fr Vincent rolls away in fear. He gets up on his knees, still wrapped up in the sleeping bag. The horse whinnies.

Avril: Morning Father. Sleep well?

Avril sits astride the horse, with a rolled up newspaper and a thermos bottle tucked under one arm, smirking down at Fr Vincent. He gets to his feet as best he can inside the sleeping bag.

Fr Vincent: Where am I?

Avril grins: You're at the first fence. This is where I school my jumpers.

Fr Vincent peels off the sleeping bag: Thought it was a dry ditch.

Avril: No, that's the third fence. When you have booked you see. (??)

Fr Vincent leans over to put on his shoes.

Avril holds up the newspaper: I didn't know what paper you take. She holds up the thermos bottle: Coffee?

Fr Vincent pauses, looks at her: You knew?

Avril: John Joe saw you. I told him not to wake you.

Fr Vincent pulls on his other shoe.

Avril: Listen Father, if you're desperate...

Fr Vincent straightens up, looks at Avril with a desperate look on his face. Avril snickers. Fr Vincent looks around on the ground.

Avril: Ah look. I'm sorry.
She dismounts: I wasn't thinking.
She hands him the thermos bottle: Listen. Come back to the house.

Fr Vincent takes the thermos bottle.

Avril: We'll sort something out. Vincent. What is the point of a spare room if it's just sitting empty.

Fr Vincent pours himself a cup of coffee: I don't think you're Father Mac's idea of a landlady.

Avril: Yeah well. I'm not offering a bed to Father Mac. Anyway. He's on his way out.

Fr Vincent looks at Avril: What?

Avril: One of my owners told me. Plays golf with the bishop.

Fr Vincent doesn't understand: But-- On his way out, why?

Avril: How should I know? He's losing his grip apparently, whatever that means.

Fr Vincent looks down, downcast.

Avril: I thought you'd be pleased.

Fr Vincent puts the cup back on top of the thermos, hands the bottle back to Avril: See you later.

Avril: OK.

SCENE: Sacristy interior.

Fr Vincent, finally wearing priest's garb again, is washing his hands at the sink. He straightens his sleeves and buttons the cuffs. He puts on the white collar.

CUT TO: Church exterior.

Fr Vincent closes the door behind himself as he exits the church.

SCENE: Bishop's office interior.

The bishop is sitting at his desk. Fr Vincent is standing before the desk.

Fr Vincent demands: Is it true?

Bishop: That's...none of your business.

Fr Vincent: Father MacAnally is my parish priest.

Bishop: And I'm your bishop.
He writes something in the book which lies open on the desk in front of him.

Fr Vincent: If you fire anyone, it should be me.

The bishop looks up at Fr Vincent, coolly: That can be arranged.

Fr Vincent: Why don't you?

Bishop: Father, no one wants to get rid of either of you. Especially you. You've brought vigor, energy, dynamic to the parish.
He sits back in his chair, speaks as if it were a painful topic: Father...MacAnally. Well. How can I put this?
He looks off to the side, out the window, then back at Fr Vincent: We have a lot of young people in this country. He doesn't...
He searches for the word: Lighten up as he gets older.

Fr Vincent: I'm not trying to make your life more difficult, Bishop.

The bishop nods, understanding: I know.

Fr Vincent: And I know you don't want to lose a priest.

Bishop: Oh that would be...unfortunate.

Fr Vincent, coolly: Whereas to lose two, sounds like carelessness.

Bishop: Meaning?

Fr Vincent: If he goes, I go too.

The bishop considers this, nods ever so slightly, looks away.

SCENE: Daytime. Sunny. Liam's house exterior.

Liam exits the house, rubs his eye, walks on the path going around to the front of the house.

CUT TO: Street outside Liam's house.

Liam walks through the gate leading out onto the street, whistling. He hops over the step, looks around, seems to be missing something. He takes off on foot.

SCENE: Daytime. Sunny. Country road.

Frankie's police car is parked at a curve in the road. She is standing just in front of the police car, talking to Liam.

Liam: What right have the Credit Bank of Ireland to take my truck.

Frankie: Cause it isn't your truck, is it Liam. It belonged to Brian Quigley, you just drove around in it. It was only an oversight on the bank's part that you had it for so long.

Liam chews his gum: And you wouldn't have reminded them, would you?

Frankie denies it vehemently: No I wouldn't. But there's something I'd remind you about.

Liam squints, chews his gum some more: Where's me sound system?

Frankie: Stolen property, it goes back to its rightful owner.

Liam squints, chews his gum: What stolen property?

Frankie: Your sound system. It was stolen out of a house in Cilldargan two weeks ago.

Liam squawks: What?

Frankie calms him: I'm not saying you took it, Liam, but where did you get it.

Liam shakes his head: No way.

Frankie insists tiredly: Yes way.

Liam: Stolen?

Frankie nods solemnly.

Liam: Can't be.

Frankie: Where'd you get it Liam?

Liam: An ad in the newspaper.

Frankie nods.

Liam: I have receipts.

Frankie: Maybe you can claim it against tax.
She shakes her head: Tax. What am I saying?
She turns to get back into her car.

SCENE: Daytime. Rainy. Alley next to Fitzgerald's.

Paul is pushing a big green garbage bin out toward the street. In front of Fitzgerald's, Oonagh is wiping off the blue benches. The garbagemen (sanitation workers) are collecting garbage along the street. The two land developers, wearing dark suits, emerge from behind the garbage truck and walk purposefully toward Fitzgerald's. They pass Oonagh without a word. Oonagh watches them pass and enter Fitzgerald's.

CUT TO: Fitzgerald's interior.

The hotel door opens. The two land developers enter.

Paul (voice off-camera): Sorry gents, we're--

CUT TO: Bar.

Paul is cleaning off the bar with a little pink feather duster. He looks at the two men, surprised. The two men walk up to Paul and stand in front of him, look at him forcefully. The second man folds his arms across his chest. Paul stands there and looks at them, the feather duster upright in one hand.

Paul: Oh.

Man 1: Tick tock Paul, we gotta know.

Paul: Come on lads, I've only had--

Man 2: You've had two days Paul. Look we do have other options.

Paul: You do?

Man 1: Money for nuttin Paul. What's your problem?

Paul: The problem is I live here.

Man 2 closes his eyes and looks impatient.

Man 1 inclines his head toward outside: What is it, the missus?

Paul: No. We've talked about it

Man 1: Ah Paul, she doesn't wear the trousers, does she?

Paul looks at the feather duster and twirls it around slowly, lays it down on the bar top.

Oonagh enters through the pub door, leaving it open, looks at the two men, walks over to stand next to Paul, crosses her arms across her chest, firmly: My husband makes all the decisions in this house.

Man 2: Hey Oonagh how's it going?

Oonagh, stonily: Do I know you?

The two men exchange glances.

Man 1: We need to know Paul or we're looking elsewhere.

Paul nods his head, looks like he's about to say, "Yeah, well--" when a crash sounds from outside. Everybody looks out the door. Paul runs outside. Oonagh follows him.

CUT TO: Street in front of Fitzgerald's.

The garbage men have dropped the contents of the green garbage bin on the front of Paul's car.

Paul, annoyed: Ah great lads brilliant. What say we try the best of three, huh?
He walks over to the garbage truck, steps on a bag of garbage accidentally. The bag spews dust all over.

Oonagh, behind Paul, sympathetically, tentatively: Paul?

Paul turns around, exhales, walks past Oonagh back into the pub. The garbage men work to right the garbage bin. Oonagh watches Paul, bites her lip.

CUT TO: Fitzgerald's interior.

Paul re-enters the pub, resumes his stance next to the bar, turns to his guests: Now gents.

The two men look expectantly at Paul.

Paul: You were saying.

Man 1: We were saying Paul, we can go elsewhere.

Oonagh comes back in, puts her hands on Paul's shoulders, takes off his jacket, lovingly: It's all right, love.
She takes the jacket and steps outside.

The two men watch Paul. Paul looks at Oonagh.

CUT TO: Fitzgerald's entrance interior.

Through the open door, we can see Oonagh standing outside, brushing off Paul's jacket.

CUT TO: Fitzgerald's interior.

Paul turns back to the men: OK. Look somewhere else.

Man 1 protests: Paul--

Paul cuts him off: No that's it.
He turns to Oonagh, who re-enters the pub, pausing in the doorway. Paul's voice off-camera: That's our decision.

Oonagh smiles at him, walks over to him and gives the two men a triumphant look.

Paul smiles at the two men: Final.

The two men look like that's kind of what they had expected.

SCENE: Shelagh's house interior.

Shelagh, in a wheelchair, is waiting just inside the door. Frankie, carrying a cardboard box full of groceries, enters.

Shelagh, pleased: Frankie! You didn't have to do that.
She wheels her chair around.

Frankie enters, closes the door with her elbow, modestly: Well, I had to do my own anyway. I'll take the money off you though.

Shelagh wheels away: Indeed you will. Put it on down a second.

Frankie puts the box down on the kitchen table. There is an ashtray on the table, with a burning butt in it.

Shelagh goes to her purse to get some money.

Frankie starts unpacking the box: I didn't know you smoked, Auntie Shelagh.

Shelagh turns around in surprise, money in hand. Frankie indicates the ashtray on the table. Shelagh looks at the ashtray, then back at Frankie, looks guilty. Frankie looks at Shelagh, then back at the ashtray. Shelagh stares at Frankie. Frankie puts the groceries down and walks around the table to the ashtray. She picks up the butt and smells it.

Frankie: Och, Shelagh no. Ah God no!

Shelagh shrugs, apologetically: Frankie--

Frankie pleads: Tell me this isn't yours.

Shelagh shrugs and looks down.

Frankie demands: Shelagh!

Shelagh, righteously indignant: Don't shout at me.

Frankie turns away.

CUT TO: A little later. Shelagh's living room interior.

Frankie and Shelagh are sitting at the table in the living room, a tray of tea between them.

Frankie: How can I leave him out of it? He prescribed it.

Shelagh protests: He did not prescribe it.

Frankie: Oh you wheeled yourself up there did you.

Shelagh: He took a cutting I asked for. He didn't know it was there till I told him.

Frankie looks down, considering.

Shelagh: And before you start getting all high and mighty on me, Frances, I could smell the nicotine on your breath the minute you opened your mouth.

Frankie: Cigarettes are legal.

Shelagh: And if they legalised heroin would you take that too?

Frankie pinches her lips together and gives Shelagh a look that says, "Come on that's not fair."

Shelagh: I have multiple sclerosis Frances. I don't smoke this stuff for pleasure.

Frankie looks down, then back at Shelagh: Oh Shelagh.

SCENE: Avril's kitchen interior.

Avril is sitting at the table, opening some mail.

Fr Vincent enters, wearing priest's suit, shirt open at the neck, a towel over his shoulder.

Avril: That better?

Fr Vincent: I owe you.
He smiles at her and drops the towel over the back of a chair.

Avril, emphatically: You do.
She looks at the mail: The bishop phoned.

Fr Vincent, surprised: What? He knows I'm here?

Avril rolls her eyes: On the mobile, stupid.
She indicates his phone lying on the table.

Fr Vincent, flustered: Who'd he think you were?

Avril, nonchalantly: Don't know. Told him you were in the bath.
She drops the mail on the table: He didn't say anything after that.

Fr Vincent looks away, meaning, "Oh great, just what I need."

Avril: Relax. It was the bishop's office.
She leans forward, consults a paper on the table: Now let me get this right. You're supposed to be hearing confession in Cilldargan, is that it?
She looks at Fr Vincent.

Fr Vincent sits down to put on his shoes: Yes.

Avril taps her pen on the table top: Change of plan. You're going to Bealach na gCapaill instead.

Fr Vincent: I am?

Avril confirms: You are. The old priest up there...

Fr Vincent: Bucky Beaumont.

Avril pauses, amused: Bucky Beaumont?

Fr Vincent: That's his name. What about him?

Avril makes fun of the name: Bucky...Beaumont...

Fr Vincent: Avril--

Avril: OK, OK. Well apparently, Bucky's not feeling too well, so you're to fill in, instead.

Fr Vincent: Is he OK?

Avril: Bucky? Yeah he's fine. Probably left his horse at the rodeo.

Fr Vincent almost cracks a smile.

Avril reassures him: He's fine.
She opens another piece of mail: Touch of 'flu is all. Didn't want to spread his germs all over the confessional.

Fr Vincent looks affectionately at Avril.

Avril protests: Hey, I didn't offer to take messages.

Fr Vincent, quietly: Thank you, Avril.

Avril smiles, looks at her mail.

SCENE: Daytime. Sunny. Fr Mac's house exterior.

The door opens. Fr Mac comes out, closes the door behind himself, walks down the step with the aid of his cane. From inside the house, a telephone rings. Fr Mac pauses, looks around, walks away.

CUT TO: Bucky's living room interior.

Bucky, wearing a dressing gown, is sitting in an armchair before a fireplace, holding a telephone to his ear. He replaces the receiver on the hook, coughs, sniffles, picks up a tissue and wipes his nose.

CUT TO: Church interior.

Fr Mac walks down the center aisle of the empty church, genuflects with some difficulty before the altar, hobbles off to the side.

CUT TO: Confessional interior.

Fr Vincent slides back the confessional window. Fr Mac is on the other side.

Fr Mac doesn't look through the window: Bless me Father, it's...two weeks since my last confession.

Fr Vincent sits bolt upright on recognising Fr Mac's voice.

Fr Mac continues: I was uh, disrespectful to my superior.
He admits grudgingly: I was short-tempered with my subordinate...

Fr Vincent rolls his eyes at this.

Fr Mac: Even if he had it coming to him.

Fr Vincent blurts out: HE had it coming?

Fr Mac looks through the window, surprised: Father Sheahan!

Fr Vincent murmurs: If I'd have known you were coming, I'd--

Fr Mac blusters: Wh-- W-- I always come here! Where's Bucky?

Fr Vincent: He's a bit croupy. He'll be all right.

Fr Mac shakes his head, incredulously: Well this is impossible. He looks down.

Fr Vincent: We have to talk this out, Father.
He offers: I don't mind swapping sides.

Fr Mac, venemously: Stay where you are.
He sighs a couple of times, finally vents, angrily: You're impertinent, insolent, brash and...disobedient.

Fr Vincent chews on this for a moment: Yes. And you are...
He closes his mouth, cutting off the words.

Fr Mac: Well come on, get on with it.

Fr Vincent considers, then continues: Cranky. Grumpy. Cantankerous. Quarrelsome.

Fr Mac: You see. All the things you are. Only older.

Fr Vincent turns his head quickly toward Fr Mac, alarmed at this comparison. Then he looks away, nods his head imperceptibly, admits: Yeah.

Fr Mac, spitefully: Well don't worry about it Father, this is not an accommodation you will have to make much longer.

Fr Vincent: I'm not going anywhere.

Fr Mac sighs: I'm quite sure you're not. Now if you don't mind, I would like to make my confession.

Fr Vincent, humbly: Yes. Of course.

Fr Mac, angrily: I'll wait for Bucky! He struggles to his feet, leaves the confessional.

Fr Vincent slides the confessional window shut, mutters: He'll never change.

SCENE: Frankie's office interior.

Dr. Ryan is sitting. Frankie is standing next to the desk.

Frankie looks away from Dr. Ryan: What really shocks me, Michael, is that when my aunt asks you to get her a cutting, you go and do it.
She walks around the desk, behind Dr. Ryan.

Dr. Ryan: I didn't just go and do it. I spent a lot of time reading the research and I concluded, like the House of Lords...

Frankie turns around at this, opens her mouth to interject something, settles for folding her arms across her chest to indicate her rejection of this argument.

Dr. Ryan continues: ...that, under certain conditions, doctors ought to be able to prescribe it for pain relief.

Frankie: The House of Lords.

Dr. Ryan clarifies: In England.

Frankie reminds him: We're not in England.

Dr. Ryan reminds her: You're not in pain.

Frankie rolls her eyes, walks back around behind Dr. Ryan to the other side of the desk, stops next to Dr. Ryan: What am I going to do, Doctor?

Dr. Ryan: Nothing.

Frankie protests: I can't just do nothing.

Dr. Ryan: I think it's time you experienced some...short term memory loss.

Frankie, sarcastically: Oh what are you going to give me for that, Doc?

Dr. Ryan: Frankie, chill.

Frankie: It's got to stop now Michael.

Dr. Ryan hesitates, then nods in resignation.

Frankie: OK.
She walks over to the door, opens it.

Dr. Ryan stands, walks to the door, pauses: Frankie...when did you come back on the fags?

Frankie: Out!

Dr. Ryan holds up both hands in surrender, leaves. Frankie closes the door.

SCENE: Daytime. Overcast. Country road.

Liam is walking along the road. His breath is visible in the cold air. The blue truck he used to drive comes up behind him. He stops on the side of the road. The truck pulls up next to him.

CUT TO: Truck interior.

Donal is driving the truck. He puts it into park and sets the brake, looks out the window at Liam and grins, proudly: What do you think?

Liam, evenly: I think that's my truck.

Donal's smile fades, he sighs, resignedly: It always will be, Liam.
He nods: In a sense.

Liam: In what sense.

Donal, pleased with himself: In the sense that...it won't be. I bought it.

Liam: Where?

Donal: Auction in Cilldargan.

Liam closes his eyes, makes a face that says, "I should have known."
He opens his eyes, asks: Any chance of a lift home?

Donal, generously: No problem.

Liam walks around the front of the truck to the passenger's side.

Donal holds up a cassette tape, calls: Have you heard the latest Kenny Rogers?
He puts it into the tape deck.

CUT TO: Truck exterior.

Liam climbs into the truck. The music plays: Have I told you lately that I love you...
Liam puts his feet up on the dashboard. Donal starts the truck up and drives away.
Music: Have I told you there's no one else above you.

SCENE: Fitzgerald's interior.

The TV is on, showing a field.

TV announcer: Local news now and the proposal to build a rubbish dump in a field outside Ballykissangel, has been abandoned.

Oonagh and Paul are behind the bar. Brendan and Siobhan are at the end of the bar. Louis accepts a pint of stout from Paul and walks over to a side table.

TV announcer: After counselors revealed, there wasn't enough rubbish to fill the dump, they already had.

TV shows shot of a rubbish dump.

Fr Vincent enters through the pub door, looks up at the TV.

TV shows a crane moving garbage around the dump.

TV announcer: Meanwhile, two officials in the Cilldargan planning department have been suspended as the council ordered, an immediate investigation.

Brendan, triumphantely: Hah!

TV announcer: Turning to world news again--

Oonagh holds up the remote control, turns off the TV.

Fr Vincent: You all right, Paul?

Paul looks over at Fr Vincent questioningly.

Fr Vincent: You look a bit pale, mate.

Oonagh, mysteriously: Shaved a bit closely, Father.
She pats Paul on the shoulder as she walks away.

Paul asks Fr Vincent: Usual?

Fr Vincent: Yeah, thanks.

Paul turns to prepare the drink.

Brendan, to Siobhan: Oh you know that stuff you found? Was it what you thought it was?

Siobhan nods: So the lab says.

Paul pours a drink on top of the bar, asks Siobhan curiously: Where exactly was it growing?

Siobhan, firmly: Only Pluto can tell you that, Paul.

Paul grimaces.

Brendan, comfortingly: Ah don't worry Paul. There's so much grass in Ireland you could sit on it.

Paul acknowledges the point.

Brendan: Isn't that right, Father?

Fr Vincent raises his eyebrows: Hm?

The hotel door opens. Fr Mac enters, closes the door behind himself. Fr Vincent puts down his drink, walks over to Fr Mac.

Fr Mac, pleasantly: Father Sheahan.

Fr Vincent, sincerely: I wanted to--

Fr Mac: Apologize?

Fr Vincent, innocently: What for?

Fr Mac, amused: I wouldn't know where to begin, Father. But if you were going to, I would need to sit down.

Fr Vincent looks at him warmly.

Fr Mac: Are you all right for tonight?

Fr Vincent raises his eyebrows: Hm?

Fr Mac: Somewhere to stay.

Fr Vincent's brain shifts into gear: Oh oh God yeah yeah yeah I'm I'm staying up at--

Fr Mac, dryly: I don't want to hear it.
He walks past Fr Vincent toward the bar.

Paul: Hi Father.

Everyone smiles at Fr Mac and greets him.

Fr Vincent watches Fr Mac and smiles, shaking his head.

ROLL CREDITS