Fallen Angel

Fallen Angel

Written by John Forte, transcribed by Brian

Siobhan is seen cleaning up after a farm call. Looking quite tired, she gets into her Land Rover and tunes in the radio. She breaks into a big smile as the DJ says:

“Good mornin BallyK! This is Angel FM, your all new, all singin radio station coming live from - somewhere near ya! So get up and get down, we’re gonna shake this town! AaaaOoohhh!”

[Opening Credits]

Father Clifford is seen trying unsuccessfully to start his motorbike. He hears Siobhan’s radio as she drives up.

Siobhan Happy Birthday, Father.

Peter How did you know?

Siobhan Angel FM.

Peter Angel what?

Siobhan The new radio station.

Peter is seen running up to where Brian Quigley, Liam and Donal are securing a large sign with Quigley’s image advertising Vale View Manor Luxury Houses to a trailer.

Quigley, Liam and Donal Oh happy birthday, Father. Happy Birthday, Father.

Peter Oh don’t tell me, you heard it on the radio.

Quigley 106.5 FM, the medium is the message.

Peter Well look, if you’re around later this evening for a drink . . .

Quigley Ah, sorry, bit busy I’m afraid. (To the boys - “All right lads”) What do you think of it?

Peter Ah, it’s, it’s very . . . big.

Quigley Well you know yourself, Father, you got to spread the good word.

They drive off, Peter runs down the road.

Assumpta is seen standing on a bench, washing the outside of one of the pub’s windows. Peter runs up to the bus stop where several people are waiting.

Assumpta Is your bike broken again?

Peter walks over to Assumpta and sits on the bench.

Peter I think I’ve just given it the last rites.

Assumpta Ohh, you need a car.

Peter Tell me about it! Father Mac’s been on at me to take driving lessons and buy one, he didn’t say what with exactly.

Assumpta You’ll have to start charging for confessions.

Peter Are you going to be around at all this evening?

Assumpta No, I’m going out with Niamh. Why?

Peter Oh, I was just going to suggest maybe having a drink.

The bus arrives, Peter gets up and starts over.

Assumpta Sorry, some other time.

Peter Yeah, of course.

Peter boards the bus.

Peter (to the bus driver) Morning.

The people on the bus Happy Birthday, Father.

Hendley’s Shop, Padraig is at the check out.

Kathleen That’s £2.75 please.

Padraig You could be arrested for that.

Kathleen Don’t blame me for your vices Padraig O’Kelly. (To a young man who is carrying a crate of cartons) Well, will you hurry up and get the milk in there before the sell by date!

Young Man Yes, aunty.

Kathleen Don’t you know sloth is a sin?

Young Man I thought it was a hairy mammal.

Siobhan comes hurriedly through the door.

Siobhan Have you heard about the Angel?

Padraig Siobhan, those drugs you carry around with you, they’re for the animals.

Siobhan leans over the counter and retunes the radio.

Kathleen What are you doing?

Siobhan Shush Shush Shush

DJ . . . breakfast show. It’s Father Clifford’s birthday today. “Happy birthday to you, happy birthday . . .”

Kathleen Who’s that?

Siobhan No idea, but isn’t it wonderful!

Padraig Sounds like a pirate radio station.

DJ Reports are coming in of several bargain offers in Kathleen Hendley’s shop. Pigs have also been seen flying in the area.

Kathleen snaps off the radio and glares at the young man.

We see the entrance, then the hallway, of St Columcilles Hospital. We hear, then see, Father Clifford saying Mass to some patients.

Peter Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with you. Blessed art thou amongst women and blessed the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen. In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Amen.

Kathleen and Ambrose in the Kitchen of the police house.

Ambrose So what’s the harm in it?

Kathleen The harm, Gard Egan, is that this pirate is spreading vicious rumors over the airwaves.

Ambrose Augh, come on Kathleen, you know what this place is like.

DJ . . . for a very important news flash. There has been a robbery in BallyK! A man was seen running out of O’Reilley’s hardware carrying tins of red and blue paint. The local Garda advise no one, I repeat no one, to approach him as he may be violet.

Ambrose, who has knocked his puzzle from the table in his haste, looks quite perturbed. Kathleen has a “I told you so” look as she leaves.

Father Peter and a nurse are seen walking down a corridor.

Sister Thank you, Father. Everyone appreciates your visits.

Peter It’s all part of the service, Sister.

Peter says “Good morning” to a man in the corridor.

Sister It helps take their minds off of things for a while.

Another man comes down the corridor, saying nothing.

Peter He’s new, isn’t he?

Sister Yes, that’s Mr Bradley. he used to be the judge in Cilldargan. He was admitted yesterday, demanded a private room.

Peter Well, has he no family or friends?

Sister Well, his wife died a few years back and he doesn’t have any children. As for friends, somehow, I doubt it.

We see a man lying, propped up, in a hospital bed, looking out the window. He is just starting to read his book when Peter knocks, then enters the room.

Peter It’s Mr Bradley, isn’t it?

Judge Bradley Is that what it says above my bed?

Peter Ahh, yes.

Judge Bradley Well then, that’s who I am.

Peter Would you rather I left?

Judge Bradley Well please yourself, the Church owns the place.

Peter Well, it’s not quite as simple as that.

Judge Bradley Well, they act like they do. And you’re a priest, aren’t you?

Peter Is that what it says around my neck?

Judge Bradley Save your prayers for someone who needs them. I may be dying, but I don’t need you, Father Macanally, or the church to make my peace with God.

Peter I see.

Judge Bradley So there’s no chance of you lot getting any of my money.

Peter I don’t want your money.

Judge Bradley Don’t let the Vatican hear you saying that.

Peter I’ll see you another time maybe.

Judge Bradley I’m not going anywhere.

Donal is finishing up the sign installation, Quigley and Liam look on.

Liam Right Donal, that’s it. You look good, Mr Quigley.

Quigley I do, don’t I?

Liam Yuh. Must be an old photo.

Donal These houses will go like hotcakes now Mr Quigley.

Quigley Maybe, but I reckon we could go one better. I want you both to keep your ears to the ground, see if you can find who’s behind this new radio station, could prove useful.

Father Mac and Peter are seated in Father Mac’s office with papers and books spread on the desk, the housekeeper is clearing away the tea things.

Peter I met a new patient at the hospital this morning.

Father Mac Is that a fact? Now, if you do Tuesday evening’s Mass, I'll do the following Thursday.

Peter Fine

Father Mac Good

Peter His name’s Michael Bradley.

Father Mac Mickey Bradley, the judge?

Peter Yeah, that’s him. He was admitted yesterday. It’s his heart.

Father Mac Never knew he had one.

Peter Did you know him well?

Father Mac I haven’t seen him since his wife died, that must be nearly ten years ago. She was ill for a very long time, God rest her. I hear he hasn’t been the same since. Pity. He used to be a demon chess player.

Peter He’s suspicious of the Church, thinks we’re after his money.

Father Mac (laughs) Sure, the man is paranoid! Mickey and I never saw eye to eye. Mind you, it might be different with a newcomer like you. by the way, Father, I hear your transport failed you again today.

Peter Yeah, well.

Father Mac It’s not good enough, you know. You have to learn to drive.

Peter I can drive, sort of. Me dad taught me the basics before he died, I just didn’t pass me test.

Father Mac Well, you’ll have to. BallyK needs a four wheeled priest.

Peter Easier said then done. I don’t have the money.

Father Mac Well then, you better start saving, well it’s either that, or we may have to reconsider your posting.

Peter looks down in response to that.

Peter is waiting at the stop, the Ballykissangel bus arrives and he gets on.

Peter How are ya? (to the driver)

Peter sits beside the young man who works at Hendley’s.

Peter Mind if I join you?

Young Man Oh, ah, no.

Peter Peter Clifford.

Young Man Daniel Gogan, I work in Mrs. Hendley’s shop.

Peter Yeah, I know. She’s your aunt, isn’t she?

Young Man Yeah, the aunty from Hell, oh, if you pardon the expression Father.

We hear the DJ while we see the bus moving along the road.

DJ While the rain in Spain is staying mainly on the plain, it’s a sunny day for May in BallyK!

Peter How long have you lived in sunny BallyK?

Young Man I don’t live there, I just work there Father, there aren’t many jobs around here, sure, if there were, I wouldn’t have to work for my aunt.

Peter And do you want to stay in the area?

Young Man Sure, it’s my home Father, and anyway, why would anyone want to leave here?

Peter walks across the bridge and into Fitzgerald’s. The pub is decorated and everyone wishes him a happy birthday as he enters. Donal passes him a pint and Assumpta raises her glass to him. Peter is seen opening a present.

Niamh We thought you might need them. (The present is some learner Driver booklets)

Peter Someone’s been talking to father Mac! Thanks anyway.

Assumpta They go with this. (She hands him a card)

Peter Assumpta, you shouldn’t have.

Assumpta I know, it’s against my religion to give presents to priests.

Peter Hmm, “This card entitles you to six free driving lessons” Great, who

with?

Assumpta Me. (As she holds out two Learner Driver signs. Peter smiles.)

The scene shifts across the bar.

Quigley Have you heard anymore about this radio station Ambrose?

Niamh He wants to close it down.

Padraig What for? It’s doing no one any harm.

Ambrose I have to uphold the law.

Siobhan Kathleen just wants to keep BallyK’s gossip to herself.

Ambrose Look, it’s illegal to broadcast without a license! And if anyone knows anything, they better tell me.

We see some electronic equipment including a reel to reel tape machine which is running.

DJ And that just about wraps it up for tonight here on Angel FM. Don’t forget to tune in tomorrow but for now, good night and God bless.

A hand reaches over and switches off the tape machine.

Assumpta’s van is coming down the road, we hear a discussion between the occupants.

Assumpta Clutch.

Peter Yeah.

Assumpta Clutch!

Peter Yes!

Assumpta Press the clutch!

Peter I am pressing it!

Assumpta Press it harder!

A scene outside of Hendley’s shop, Daniel is putting a “Special Offers” sign in the window.

Daniel Is this all right for ya here aunty?

Kathleen Don’t use too much tape, it isn’t staying up for long. (To Siobhan, who is looking at the sign) Is anything the matter?

Siobhan You feeling all right Kathleen?

Kathleen I’m feeling fine.

Back to the interior of Assumpta’s van.

Assumpta Okay, when I hit the dashboard, I want you to do an emergency stop.

Peter Yeah, that’s what I failed on the first time I took me test.

Assumpta How many times have you taken it!?

Peter Only twice.

Assumpta Ohh, now he tells me. What did you fail on the second time?

Peter Observation. (He says this while looking directly at her)

Assumpta Look out!

They both stomp down on the brake pedal, stopping just short of Kathleen who is crossing the road. Kathleen gives them one of her looks.

Peter How was that?

Assumpta Better luck next time.

We see the van going down the road at a good clip.

Peter You know, I’m getting back into the swing of this. I hope my father is watching me.

Assumpta He’ll be seeing us in person if you don’t slow down.

Peter I’m visiting a patient in the hospital this morning, Michael Bradley, do you know him?

Assumpta Everyone knows Judge Mickey, some more than others.

Peter He reminds me of me dad a bit.

Assumpta Bet your dad never fined you fifty quid for something that was no fault of your own.

Peter Michael Bradley fined you? What for?

Assumpta Dangerous driving.

We see Judge Bradley struggle into the chair besides the window, a chess board is on the table. The van pulls into the parking area at the hospital.

Assumpta Anyway, what are you visiting him for, I thought he was another lost cause like me.

Peter There’s always hope.

Assumpta Oh well, I suppose it’s different for him. He has two things that always interest the church, money and no next of kin.

Peter “It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of Heaven”, Matthew, chapter 19.

Assumpta “Money, so they say, is the root of all evil today”, Pink Floyd, Dark Side of the Moon.

Peter walks into Judge Bradley’s room.

Peter Good morning, Mr Bradley.

Judge Bradley You don’t give up, do you?

Peter I have my orders.

Judge Bradley Hmmm, who’s the girl, I recognize her face?

Peter She’s a friend, she’s teaching me to drive.

Judge Bradley You call that driving?

Peter Yeah, I’m a bit rusty, but I’ve got to pass my test somehow.

Judge Bradley You see that (Peter picks up the photo on the bedside table, it shows a woman standing beside a car) I’ve been driving that car since before you were born, and I never took a test.

Peter Is this your wife?

Judge Bradley Yeah

Peter What was her name?

Judge Bradley Emily.

Peter She was very pretty.

Judge Bradley She was beautiful.

Peter sets the photo back down and walks over to the table.

Peter I believe you’re good.

Judge Bradley Father Macanally has been briefing you well.

Peter I can’t say I’ll give you a great game, but I promise to try.

Judge Bradley What’s your name Father?

Peter Peter, Peter Clifford. (They shake hands)

Judge Bradley Well Peter Clifford, let me warn you, I enjoy sacrificing Bishops!

In a recording studio, Liam and Brian are wearing headphones and speaking into microphones, soft music plays in the background.

Quigley Howdy folks, my name is Brian Quigley and I’m here to talk to you about my new homes in beautiful BallyK. Each one is individually designed and comes with a Quigley quality guarantee. Here’s one lucky customer that’s already decided to move in.

Liam Ahh, yes. I spent a long time looking for the right place but now my search is over, thanks to you Mr Quigley.

Quigley My pleasure. Remember folks, Quigley homes means quality homes, so don’t delay, move up now to BallyK. (Pause) How was that?

Soundman One more time, hmm?

Back at the hospital, Peter is hesitating over his next chess move.

Judge Bradley Tell me, Father, what did your mother say when you told her you wanted to be a priest?

Peter She was pleased, she always said I’d go far in the Church and you can’t get much farther than Ballykissangel.

Judge Bradley Hmm, and your father?

Peter Well, let’s just say that he had more faith in professions than vocations.

Judge Bradley Listen my children to a father’s instruction.

Peter I did listen to him, but he didn’t return the favor.

Judge Bradley Sensible man. I once considered being a priest, many young men do in this country.

Peter What stopped you?

Judge Bradley I wanted to marry someone other than the church.

Peter You must miss Emily a lot.

Judge Bradley Every day, she’s my first thought and my last. You’d understand if you had ever loved someone like I love her. Have you?

Peter I don’t know anyone who hasn’t been in love at one time or another. (Peter makes a chess move)

Judge Bradley Tsk tsk tsk tsk. You’re not concentrating Father.

Peter Sorry. Told you I wasn’t very good at this game.

Judge Bradley Which game do you mean, chess or priest?

Peter You know sometimes Mr Bradley, you sound like the Devil himself!

Judge Bradley You’re all right, Father!

He starts to laugh then to cough violently, he knocks the chess pieces from the board.

Peter You okay? (He then yells: “Sister!”)

She comes in and helps Mr Bradley to his bed.

Judge Bradley I’m all right, just leave me in peace!

Sister Let’s have a look at you.

Peter Just take it easy Mr Bradley, you’ll be all right.

Judge Bradley Leave me alone! Get that priest out of here!

Sister I think you better go Father.

Back at the recording studio, the soundman hands Brian Quigley a tape of the advertisement.

Soundman There you go, all ready for broadcast.

Quigley Thank you. You have everything you need here, haven’t you, all the necessary.

Soundman Necessary for what?

Quigley Oh, say, setting up a radio station

Soundman (Laughs) Thinking of competing with Angel FM, are you?

Quigley Do you know it?

Soundman Should do, I fixed the fella up.

Quigley What fella was that?

Soundman He was a very secretive sort, if you get my meaning.

Quigley Well how secretive, (He counts off several notes) exactly.

We see the bus.

DJ Next we have a letter sent in, ahh, from a listener from BallyK. “Dear Angel FM, I’m a big fan of your station and tune in whenever I can. keep up the good work. Yours faithfully, Mr E. Presley.” Well thank ya Mr Presley, this one goes out to you.

Brian Quigley parks his Land Rover. He looks around a bit apprehensively and is carrying the tape of the advertisement under his arm. Ambrose is around the corner, coming in his direction.

Quigley Jesus, Ambrose you near frightened the life out of me!

Ambrose I’m sorry Mr Quigley.

Quigley What are you doing skulking there?

Ambrose I have orders to find this radio station.

Quigley You haven’t found it yet, have you?

Ambrose Not yet but I soon will.

Quigley How?

Ambrose Oh, can’t say, top secret. What’s that you have there Mr Quigley?

Quigley Oh please, Ambrose, call me Brian.

Ambrose Really?

Quigley Yes, you’ll soon be one of the family. (Then to himself: ”God help us”)

At the shop, Kathleen makes her way to the cellar.

Kathleen Daniel! Daniel!

Down in the cellar, the radio is playing, we hear Quigley’s advertisement. She turns off the radio, we see Daniel’s head pop up from behind some boxes. Well, not pop up literally, but you know what I mean!

Peter and Assumpta are driving down the road, Peter is at the wheel.

Peter This is easy!

Assumpta Pride before a fall.

Peter You’ve no faith Assumpta.

Assumpta So you keep telling me. I suppose you’re still working on restoring Mr. Bradley’s faith

Peter I am not working on him, I’m talking to him, I don’t think he’s actually talked to anyone since his wife died.

Assumpta Oh, so it’s pure coincidence that you’re showing an interest in him now just when he’s about to pop his clogs.

Peter Why do you always suspect the Church is up to no good?

Assumpta Oh God!

She has seen a pickup truck coming fast towards them around a bend.

Peter Yeah, he’s in on it too.

Assumpta No no no no! Oh God!

The truck sounds its horn and Peter runs off the road in trying to avoid him. They get out of the van.

Assumpta I just don’t believe this!

Peter Sorry.

Assumpta Sorry! You nearly killed us!

Peter Well it was your fault!

Assumpta My fault, how’d you work that one out!

Peter Well you put me off, you making those ridiculous accusations about Mr Bradley!

Assumpta Ridiculous! You don’t know the half of it!

Peter What’s that supposed to mean?

Assumpta Look, we’re both wasting our time here, you don’t need driving lessons!

Peter Well then how am I supposed to pass my test!

Assumpta Because no priest around here has ever failed his test!

Peter What is this, another of your little conspiracy theories?

Assumpta No, it’s fixed, it’s a priest perk!

Peter Yeah? Well if it’s fixed, then why are you bothering to give me driving lessons?

Assumpta Because, strange as it may seem, I didn’t want to see you kill yourself behind the wheel! Now, would you push!

Peter I don’t believe you.

Assumpta I am not asking you to believe me, I am simply asking you to push!

After some spinning, the van gets back on solid ground. We see the van pull up outside Fitzgerald’s, Assumpta walks to the back and opens the door. Peter slowly gets out, he’s spattered with mud.

Assumpta And where do you think you’re going?

Peter To clean up.

Assumpta Not until you’ve cleaned up this! (She flings a wet sponge at him)

Scene at Quigley’s house, we see Brian acting nervously after a knock at the door. The shadow on the curtain reveals it to be Ambrose.

Niamh Dad . . .

Quigley Shush, I’m not in.

Niamh Who is it?

Ambrose walks around to the back of the house, Niamh answers the door.

Niamh Oh hi Ambrose. (He moves to come in, she blocks him)

Ambrose Niamh, is your father in?

Niamh What dya want him for?

Ambrose Police business.

Niamh What’s he done now?

Ambrose He’s been advertising on this illegal radio station.

Niamh So?

Ambrose So, he knows who’s behind it.

Niamh You mean you don’t?

Ambrose Is he in or isn’t he?

Niamh No.

Ambrose Fine, well it doesn’t matter anyway, by this time tomorrow I’ll have all the means necessary.

Niamh How?

Ambrose Ohh, my lips are sealed!

He walks away, Niamh gives him a look.

Peter is on the bus, the driver is really enjoying the music.

Then at the hospital, Peter is walking down the corridor.

Peter Morning Sister.

Mr Bradley is not in his bed, Peter looks concerned. Mr Bradley then comes down the corridor.

Peter There you are.

Judge Bradley Thought I’d gone without you, ahh?

Peter It’s good to see you up.

Judge Bradley Fifty Pounds.

Peter Sorry?

Judge Bradley Your girlfriend, I remembered I once fined her fifty pounds, for dangerous driving! ha, ha, ha!

Peter She’s not my girlfriend.

Judge Bradley Oh, fallen out have you?

Peter We just see things differently.

Judge Bradley I remembered all the positions, (He points to the chess board) you can check them if you’d like.

Peter I believe you.

Scene at the police station, Ambrose is looking over some electronic

equipment.

Niamh Ambrose! - What are ya doing?

Ambrose Nothing.

Niamh You’re hiding something!

Ambrose No I’m not!

Niamh Ambrose!

Ambrose Okay, but you must promise not to breathe a word, especially to your dad.

Niamh Cross my heart and hope to die!

He steps aside to reveal the equipment.

Niamh What is it?

Ambrose It detects radio transmissions, I’m about to discover the whereabouts of one Angel FM. (Pause) Once I figure out how it works.

Niamh Here, show me.

She takes the instructions from him, he takes them back.

Ambrose Oh no you don’t, it’s secret!

Niamh It’s also secret that you tuck your shirt into your underpants!

Ambrose hands over the instruction manual.

Scene at the hospital room, Peter and Judge Bradley playing chess.

Judge Bradley Emily was a terrible backseat driver, we had some great

arguments.

Peter I can imagine.

Judge Bradley We often used to drive down to the coast, we’d walk along the sands, filling our lungs with the air. Even when she was quite ill, she still insisted that I take her there. Towards the end though, we never got out of the car. We’d just park and sit and watch the sea in silence. Then I’d drive us home, we hardly spoke a word.

Peter She knew she was dying.

Judge Bradley Yes, they wanted to bring her in here, but she refused, I nursed her at home those last few months.

Peter Must have been very difficult for you.

Judge Bradley You can’t imagine what it’s like, watching someone you love more than your own life waste away before your eyes in such pain.

Peter I imagine I’d be angry.

Judge Bradley Anger, hate, despair. I didn’t know what to do. But Emily did. She made me promise.

Peter Promise?

Judge Bradley The hospital had given me a supply of morphine for her pain. She was in such agony. she kept pleading “Please Michael, please!” In the end, I couldn’t refuse her, I made up a dose with the remaining morphine, she drank

it, and I held her quietly in my arms till it was over.

Peter You, you killed her!

Judge Bradley Some people might call it that, no doubt the church would call it a mortal sin. I thought you were different.

Peter All life is sacred in the eyes of God.

Judge Bradley Spare me your simplistic doctrine! I don’t expect absolution for something I don’t regret! - All my life I’ve passed judgment on others, now it’s my turn to be judged.

Scene at Father Mac’s office, we hear a knock at the door.

Father Mac Come in. (Peter walks in) Ah, Father.

Peter I wondered if I could have a word, I need some advice about, about a parishioner.

Father Mac Certainly, sit down. In fact, I’m glad you called, I have a date for your diary.

Peter It’s Mr Bradley.

Father Mac Oh yes?

Peter No, it’s just that I had a very difficult conversation with him.

Father Mac Oh well, he’s always been very difficult, I did warn you Father. Now, on Thursday morning at 11 o'clock, you’re taking your driving test.

Peter What!

Father Mac I rang the test center, they gave me a cancellation.

Peter But I can’t, I’m not ready.

Father Mac Fear not, Father, I’m sure you’ll pass with flying colors.

Peter So it’s true, it is a fix.

Father Mac What is?

Peter Priests don’t ever fail their tests around here, do they?

Father Mac Oh, I wouldn’t say that. There was a curate once who failed but he was unlucky, he crashed into the police station. He passed the second time though.

Peter But it’s an abuse of our position, it’s cheating.

Father Mac In this town, we call it tradition.

Peter Well I for one don’t want any part of it! (He gets up to leave)

Father Mac Father, I did tell you I wanted you mobile if you were to stay on in BallyK. Now, I see you’re down to say Mass in the hospital on Thursday. I’ll cover for you, who knows, I may even be able to persuade our difficult Mr

Bradley to receive Communion. In the meantime, I do advise you to be at the test center, on Thursday, at 11 - and Father, wearing your collar!

Scene at Fitzgerald’s, Assumpta serves Donal a pint. As he is paying, his mobile phone rings.

Donal Hello? - Yeah, I’m in the bar. - I’m having a pint Mr Quigley, that’s what I’m doin. - Right, I’ll go look for you now. (He goes to the door and looks over to the police station) No, there’s not a sign of him. You want to do what?

Scene at the police station. Ambrose is using the detecting equipment, talking to Niamh on the 2-way radio.

Ambrose Ready? Over.

Niamh Ready.

Ambrose Over and out.

Niamh This heart (Clears her throat) Wait a minute Ambrose. Okay.

Ambrose moves up through the house with the detecting apparatus.

Niamh “This heart that flutters near my heart my hope and all my riches is, unhappy when we draw apart and happy between kiss and kiss; My hope and all my riches---yes!---and all my happiness. For there, as in some mossy nest the

wrens will divers treasures keep, I laid those treasures I possessed ere that mine eyes had learned to weep. Shall we not be as wise as they though love live but a day?

Ambrose finds in the wardrobe.

Ambrose It worked!

She drags him into the wardrobe.

Ambrose Niamh! I’m on duty!

Niamh Relax Ambrose!

Various, ah, sounds are heard.

Ambrose That’s government property!

Niamh Then get it out of the way! Come here!

Quigley and Donal have made their way into the police station and have heard a good deal of what is going on over the 2-way radio that Ambrose left downstairs. Brian picks up the radio.

Quigley Good evening, Gard Egan.

Sounds of panic, perhaps injury.

At Fitzgerald’s, Assumpta is drying a glass. It seems Donal has been telling Siobhan and Padraig about the wardrobe incident. Peter comes in.

Padraig, Siobhan, Donal Father. Father. Father.

Peter Assumpta, can I ask a favor?

Assumpta What!

Peter Father Mac has arranged my test for Thursday morning at 11.

Assumpta Well what’s it got to do with me?

Peter Well, I was wondering, see I’m so used to driving your van.

Assumpta You don’t deserve it.

Peter I know.

Assumpta I’ll pick you up at 10.

Peter Thanks.

Assumpta And don’t try to look so worried, you don’t fool me.

Peter It’s not you I’m foolin, it’s myself.

He says good night and leaves, Assumpta looks a bit surprised at what he has said.

Siobhan Did you ever hear of a priest from around here that failed his driving test?

Assumpta Well, there’s always a first time.

Donal He’ll pass.

Siobhan How much?

Donal Fiver.

Siobhan You’re on.

Padraig Include me in.

Siobhan Right.

Scene in the confessional, we see the legs and cowboy boots of someone coming in.

? Howdy Father!

Peter It’s usually “Bless me Father, for I have sinned”.

? But I haven’t sinned, well at least I don’t think I have.

Peter You’re the DJ, aren’t you?

DJ The voice of Angel FM, of course you realize I have to remain incognito, there’s a load of people looking for me.

Peter Well, what do you want?

DJ Support.

Peter Why?

DJ The way I see it, Angel FM is a kind of community service for the people of BallyK.

Peter Well you may be right, but you are breaking the law.

DJ But surely there are times when you should break the law for a greater good.

Pause as Peter looks thoughtful.

DJ Father?

Peter I’m sorry?

DJ Have I done wrong?

Peter Well I think perhaps that if you truly believe that what you are doing is right and for the best intentions, then perhaps you should follow your conscience.

DJ Thank you Father, oh and one other thing Father. Would you be interested at all in doing a kind of God slot for Angel FM, you know, a sort of Soul for Souls, that sort of thing?

Peter Well I’ll bear it in mind. If I fail my driving test tomorrow, I may need all the breaks I can get.

Peter walks down the stairs at his house, adjusting his collar. A car horn sounds, he puts on his jacket and goes out. We see him driving with Assumpta.

Peter Got a nice day for it.

Assumpta Did you fix that too?

Peter Do you mind if we make a quick stop before we get there?

Assumpta You’re driving.

We hear the radio.

DJ Okay, now on behalf of Angel FM and all our listeners, I’d like to dedicate this next record to Father Clifford, who takes his driving test this morning. Good luck Father and give em Hell! And by the way, all betting is now closed. (Assumpta has a big smile after she hears this)

We see Ambrose out on the streets of BallyK, using the detection equipment which is a bit worse for the wear after the wardrobe incident.

A scene at the hospital, Assumpta waits in the van. Peter comes into Judge Bradley’s room.

Judge Bradley I didn’t expect to see you again. (He sounds much weaker than before)

Peter I can’t stay, I’m taking my driving test this morning (He takes the chess board over to the bed table) but I promised you this game, remember, and I think we should try and keep our promises if we can.

Judge Bradley What changed your mind?

Peter Let’s just say I heard the voice of an angel.

He makes a chess move.

Peter Check.

Judge Bradley You know, I agree with your mother, you will go far.

The van drives on to the test center.

Assumpta I’ll ah, I’ll wait for you, there’s a cafe above.

Peter Assumpta (He removes his collar) Hold on to this for me.

We again see Ambrose using the detection equipment.

A scene during the driving test.

Tester Prepare to stop the car and do a turn around, Mr Clifford.

Back in Ballykissangel, more detection activity.

Peter rubs the curb a bit during the maneuver. (Which could happen to anyone, really.)

Peter Sorry, I, ah, think I hit the curb.

Tester You don’t say.

Yet more detection work!

As Peter is waiting at a stop, Father Mac crosses the road in front of him. Peter waves, Father Mac looks upset when he notices him without his collar.

Ambrose comes through the door at Kathleen’s shop.

Kathleen Gard Egan, where are you going? - What are you doing?

Ambrose Shush!

Kathleen What!

He makes his way towards the cellar then throws open the door of a store room. He looks behind a pile of boxes and sees the radio station equipment. We hear a bit of the broadcast.

DJ And now for Angel FM, Mr Sean Connery. “You’re tuned in to Angel FM, playing music all day for the folk of BallyK”

Ambrose switches the tape player off, then moves some more boxes, finding Daniel, the DJ.

We see Judge Bradley sitting up in bed, half asleep, the chessboard is on his bed table. He turns to look at his photo of Emily.

We see Assumpta walk around the back of the van at the test center. Peter and the tester come through the doorway.

Tester Sorry about the mix up, Mr Clifford.

Peter Don’t worry about it.

Tester Your wife will find it amusing.

Peter smiles at this, Assumpta smiles back.

At the hospital, one of the Sisters comes out to Father Mac who is about to get in his car.

Sister Father Macanally, before you go . . .

Father Mac Yes Sister.

Sister It’s Mr Bradley, Father, he said he wanted to speak to the priest.

Father Mac I was hoping he might.

Sister Actually Father, he said he wanted to talk with the young priest.

Father Mac Sure, I hardly look a day over fifty!

A scene at Fitzgerald’s

Quigley What did I do?

Ambrose Conspiracy to pervert the course of justice, breaking and entering...

Quigley I didn’t break anything, unlike someone I could mention, damaging government property.

Ambrose In the course of my duty!

Quigley I wouldn’t exactly call being in a wardrobe with my daughter your duty.

Niamh Dad!

Quigley What?!

Niamh Could I have a little word with you please?

Quigley What?!

Padraig bursts in through the door.

Padraig They’re back!

Siobhan Who’s driving?

Padraig I’ve no idea. Come on!

They all rush out.

Niamh It’s Assumpta!

Siobhan Thank you gentlemen! (She puts her hands out as to collect from the bets)

Quigley Ah, never mind Father.

Siobhan Better luck next time Father.

Assumpta No, he passed!

? What?

Assumpta He was too shocked to drive back!

Siobhan Oh thank you very much Father!

They make their way inside, in a celebratory mood.

We see Siobhan paying for some of the drinks after losing the bets. Peter goes over to Ambrose.

Peter I hear you found the Angel.

Ambrose Ah, twas nothing, all in a days work.

Peter So what will happen to Daniel?

Ambrose Well, there was no real harm done you know, he’ll probably get away with a fine.

Peter I just wondered if there might be another way . . .

Assumpta Father.

Peter Excuse me.

Padraig makes a gesture indicating Peter’s lack of collar.

Peter (To Assumpta) What?

Assumpta Nothing.

Peter What have I done now?

Assumpta Nothing, I just wanted to give you this. (She hands him his collar) We wouldn’t want people getting the wrong idea, would we Peter?

Peter No, Assumpta, we couldn’t have that!

Just then, Father Mac comes in the door.

Peter Have you heard the good news, Father?

Father Mac Indeed, Mr Bradley asked me to find out so I called the test center. Congratulations, Mr Clifford.

Peter Thanks, I must call him.

Father Mac I’m afraid he passed away earlier this afternoon.

Peter is very affected by this news.

Assumpta I’m very sorry.

Father Mac Of course, he refused to take the last rites from me. Just like the old bugger, God rest his soul, I never did understand that man.

Peter doesn’t know what to say to that so he just gives a little laugh.

We see Peter walking in to the hospital. he opens the door to a store room and we see Daniel with some of his DJ equipment.

Daniel There you go now, Mr. Malone in Ward C, that was Gerry and the Pacemakers. And I hope yours is ticking along nicely. Okay now on Angel - Radio we have a very special disc for a slipped disc. This one is for Mrs. Young in Ward A.

We see Peter sitting at the table in Mr Bradley’s room, he’s looking over the chess board.

Sister I thought I’d leave that til you’d seen it.

Peter Thanks.

Sister Who was winning?

Peter He was. But he resigned.

Sister So you won.

Peter It was more of a draw.

Sister Never mind Father, he left you a conciliation prize, he asked me to give you these (She hands him some keys) He said something about you going places.

We see Peter looking through some obscured glass into a garage. He unlocks the door and swings them open. He smiles as he sees the car from the photograph.