Dominants' Rights
Dom Spank's Top Ten Rights of a Dominant
Note: DomSpank (aka Colonel) is a friend of ours.
If you're wondering about the meaning of the cowskull dividers, don't dwell on it too long, DomSpank used to live in Wyoming, and just recently moved to Nevada, and it seemed fitting. He wrote this essay as a favor to me, in answer to a question I had many months ago. After reading it, and liking it, Psyre and I decided it was worth crafting a new page, just for it. And hey - we're still trying to find him a subbie, so - if you like what you read, and you want to make comments to DomSpank, you can reach him by email at [email protected].
It was a cold day in the city of Cheyenne as I wrote this, thinkin' about screamer asking me what rights a Dominant has to their respective subbie.
First a couple of things (That's right disclaimer time):
- This is strictly My opinion. If it offends you, don't get crabby
with Psyre or, screamer. You can E-mail those kind of comments to me at
Colonel@Get_Bent.com.
- Dominance and submission is like religion - everyone has their own
interpretation. You have formed, or are forming your own version, and
this is Mine. It doesn't matter if it doesn't fit with your own personal
tastes, you should always respect other peoples views, or at the very
least look at them with an open mind. Live and let live - we are all a
little whacko in our own way.
- This is not meant to be gender-specific. I am a Man so, I write
from a male point of view. Also this keeps Me off any Domme
shit-lists<Snicker>
- And finally, I am not Dominant from any "Macho-Male-Superior-Bullshit" It is my nature that makes me Dominant, nothing else. I am Not better than a submissive, nor am I inferior. I have my strengths and as do submissives, each in our own way. My strengths are also different from other Dominants, as are the requirements that I have for My submissive as opposed to those of another Dom/me.
With that outta the way, you are probubly (Yes, I do spell things funny) wondering just who in da hell is this "DomSpank" guy?
Mostly, I'm a pervert (What? you were expecting RossPerot in a tutu?).
I'm a Dominant / Two-time-combat-vet / Black belt / Bull-dog-Philosopher / Wiccan / Bambi-eatin' / Skinny / Old / Smart-assed / Bow-legged / Classically-curved (Not-BENT screamer) / subbie-lovin' / Jack-of-all-trades kinda guy. Whew, say That three times fast!
I've been into D/s for a couple of years. It started out, as bein' asked to spank a girlfriend here, tie-up a girlfriend there, and I liked that it a LOT. Then I got on AOL and found a whole culture where I could really be my perverted little self. I began reading, learning and growing, but eventually those expensive Visa bills forced me onto the Internet for good.
So, in my humble (Yeah, me humble? not likely!) OPINION, here are what I believe are the "Top Ten Rights of a Dominant" (Pun intended) in no particular order of importance. They are all important.
- A Dom/me has the right to absolute honesty from the submissive.
- A Dom/me has the right to as much clear communication as the
submissive can give.
- A Dom/me has the right to be told All of the submissives'
needs/desires.
- A Dom/me has the right to be told the submissives' secret dreams.
- A Dom/me has the right to be wrong, as long as it doesn't compromise
the submissives' safety. (That's how we learn to get better)
- A Dom/me has the right to safety as much as any subbie does.
- A Dom/me has the right to experiment with ideas in a scene
negotiation.
- A Dom/me has the right to be silly.
- A Dom/me has the right to call a safe-word.
- A Dom/me has the right to Love the submissive for who they are, not who they wish to be for the Dom/me.
That's about it, if you have any questions then by all means E-mail screamer for the technical/safety/what the hell did he mean by that kinda stuff. Also you can usually find me in one of the Chateau rooms on Dalnet I.R.C.
Last of all, are my own silly quotes (Yeah, copyrighted and stuff):
-
"An equivacation is a booger on the face of truth!"
"Validity has nothing to do with the truth."
"And the worse thing that can happen, is the answer to his prayers." O.k. I stole this one from a "Love and Money" C.D.