HI BANDIDOS... I'm back from EN ZED minus Wazza...who got lost on the Ride and they're still looking for him!!!! Could you believe it? over 7200 riders (THAT'S RIGHT...7200) and the only rider to get lost was' "THE WAZ."

Just joshing, but I had you going there for a minute didn't I? Actually we both completed the ride and I flew back yesterday afternoon and Wazza is staying on over there.... because in actual fact, he lost his passport and they wouldn't let him on the plane. He,d left his wallett in the hire car so he didn't have any ID on him..... couldn't even get his ticket. (electonic ticketing requires photo ID).................The wallett was gone when he went back to the car...so he missed the plane........

HEY! HEY!!! Had you going again, didn't I????

ACTUALLY, Dee and the kids flew over on the weekend and they're all taking a 2 week holiday there.

Unfortunately I haven't seen Wazza's 2 reports he sent direct from NZ., so this will be a different perspective on the event....as you would expect...EVERYONE, has a different outlook to THE WAZ.

Imagine 7200 cyclists all congregated in a starting area about half the size of the ROAD around the Concours Shops at Beaumaris. It was wall to wall bikes and riders. I don't know all the stats but I believe that nearly half the riders are relay riders: they allow up to 4 riders per team so that each rider only has to do 40 km. Some "teams " were 2 riders...80 km. each.

Then there were the tandem riders...man, could they get up some steam coming down the hills! The logistics of transporting the bikes to the relay change-over points was unbelievable....HUGE semi trailers with ENORMOUS bike-racks with the bikes carrying a number and an A, B, C, or D as to which leg they were doing. All riders wore a very small transponder on an ankle strap which registered om a "pad" you rode over...It gave your race number, (OOPS, I mean Ride number), name, and city or country of origin. As you rode through the Start "Gate" it triggered your start time and like-wise at the finish. No cheating here. Funny thing here is that when we looked up our times at the end on the results board, they've given both Wazza and I times that are about 28 or 30 minutes better than we actually did. More about that later. THEN THERE WERE THE " Push Scooters" (Kick Bikes)..People who had totally lost their marbles went around the course on a bloody scooter!!! Can you believe that insanity?? Admittedly these weren't your everyday scooter ...Large bike wheel on the front and a golf buggy size bike wheel on the rear with brakes...imagine going up a 3km Olivers Hill on a scooter and ALSO the terrifying trip going down. Damned good way to wear out a pair of shoes among other things. Apparently, the fastest time for a "kick biker" has been 9.5 hours for the 160 km.

AND there's ALSO "THE CLASSIC" RACE FOR THE "GUNS" AND ELITE'S, which starts at 7am. These Guys and Gals are NZ's best, and do the course in 3hr 50min to 4hr 15 min. (Susie Pryde in 1999, 3hr 57min., and the fastest guy...3hr 54min....in 1999. Surprising how close they are...no offence girls.

We all wore our "ride" number pinned to our back, which also gave your name and city or country as well as your age category: Junior, Senior, and then Vet 1, Vet 2, Vet3, Vet 4 etc. You also had to nominate your anticipated time for the course and wre then given a coloured dot to stick on your "ride" no. Under 4hrs. 30 mins was yellow, 4hrs 30 to 4 hrs 50 min was blue..(that was us), and so on through to 7 hrs...then there were the "no spots" who just expected to finish.

In doing this, they spread out the riders in some form of reasonable starting order in terms of ability...The yellows went off first, and then the blues a few minutes later and so on. They separated the groups with portable cattle fences...and that's exactly how I felt...just one of a herd of several thousand cattle!

They closed the road for the first 25/30km which was absolutely essential. and rather reassuring.

160km. around an undulating and HILLY course around Lake Taupo, which is virtually dead centre of the North Island.

We entered the Solo riders Challenge...1 lap...160km.

There was also a 2 lap"Enduro" (320km.) which started at 1.30 am on Sat morning so that on their second lap they would be riding through the start point for the second lap about the time we started.

HOWEVER, if you're a real masochist, you could start at 7pm on Friday evening, and do the "Super Enduro" of 3 laps plus 20km. to make up a total of 500km.

THE HILLS..........The course starts uphill and winds it's way up for the first 20km, at quote "an easy gradient"...Picture if you will, 3 lots of Sundays KOM up Olivers and Humphreys,with about a total NETT climb of around 350 metres...this is a little "heart starter". It then "undulates" for the next 38km. until Waihaha "hill", which rises 100 metres over a 2.9km. distance. Then there's more "undulating" riding for another 25 km. and Kuratau "hill" looms up at the 86km mark. This is a little steeper than Waihaha at 110 metres rise in 2.8 km. Then there's more undulations BUT you're heading down to the edge of the lake. At around 98km. there's a LOOONG downhill run to th e lake followed by a relatively flat 30km on a very average bitumen surface. This area subject to wind, as it's flatter and a little exposed. THEN comes the Grand-daddy of all hills....Hatepe...140 metres climb over 2.9 km.. They put a sign out on the road here, "Select low gear, push those pedals, put your head down, and don't look up for the next 15 minutes. After that, there's ONLY 21km to the finish and with the exception of one long low hill, it's pretty flat or slightly down-hill.

There are numerous water stops along the way, and patrolling official cars and motor-bikes as well as police vehicles.

To ride the course in under 5 hours. To do so, means riding non-stop because there's only one time given per rider: TOTAL ELAPSED time from start to finish. Any stops for water or WEE stops are going to encroach on that elapsed time and we need to average better than 32kph to crack 5 hours. We both carry 4 water bottles. 2 in the holders and 2 in our pockets...(Throw-away bottles) I put electrolyte and carbo powder mix in two of my bottles and plain water in the other two.We each carry 2 bananas plus 3 snack-bars.We have a good breakfast and hope that this will carry us over the next 5 hours. A ride of under 5 hours is a real challenge and within our grasp.

BOOM! The gun goes off and the Yellow spots slowly move through the start gate. A few minutes and our cattle fence is removed and we get the gun to send us off (the blue spots). Wazza must have had steroids sprinkled over his corn flakes this morning because he's off up the hill like a startled rabbitt. I have trouble keeping up with him as he goes beserk in attacking the hill with 1000 other riders. "Geez, Wazza," I think to myself, "we've got a long way to go, and whilst we want to crack 5 hours, (average speed 32kph), this is a little over the top for the start." I see Waazza disappear in a crowd of coloured guerseys a100 metres or so ahead, No matter, I'll hopefully pick him up a little later when the madness and enthusiasm abates and the cold hard reality of this 20 km. "hill" starts to take affect. Sure enough the pace subsides a little and I'm up with the WAZZ at about 5km. We join up with an old Kiwi friend who did the Melb/Syd ride..Rob Irwin..he did this ride last year in 4hr 57min and wants to do a little better this year...he's definitely our man. The HUGE peleton starts to string out into several LARGE ones, and we mix it with the wannabes, shoulder to shoulder. A short down-hill run and the speed climbs over 60...Then a "thump," and it sounds like some-ones down, but no, it's a riders full water-bottle hitting the deck and spaying it's contents every-where. HELL, if I run over that at this speed I'm gone! I miss it narrowly, as does Waz, who's right behind me. Geez, I should have had that last nervous pee before the start, but the queue was a mile long. (I start calculating how many portable toilets you need to accomodate 7000 riders all wanting a last pee in the 15 minutes before the start.....HEY, stop day-dreaming and concentrate).

We travel along without incident, to the 40km. mark where the first relay change takes place, and the no.2 rider has to take the transponder off the first rider and fit it to his ankle....the passing of the baton so to speak. All this is done in a cordoned off section on the side of the road, where it doesn't interfere with us solo riders. I see a rider hanging over a fence with police in attendance abd 2 other riders standing around him. Has there been a crash or has he just over-done it ? We're sailing along at around 37kph and it all flashes past the corner of my eye. Were a quarter of the awy and I'm feeling great. Average speed 32.4kph...Hmm. not bad seeing as there's been a lot of climbing. BUT don't get too complacent, as there's a lot more climbing to do, and whilst the temperature is around 20/22 now, it will certainly get hotter as the morning wears on. The time is 9.20 and it's fine and sunny, with negligible wind. "Carefull,you'll find the average speed hard to maintain as it gets warmer and you tire. Only drunk 3/4 of a bottle of water so far: better increase the rate a little and it's "treat' time. Grab half a banana while you've got the chance. Gee I'd love a pee.

I hop onto the front half of the peleton as the speed stays around the33/37 depending on the "undulations" before I know it we're at the first of the Monster hills at 58km. A few comments come from riders who've been through this before. The peleton starts to spread out. I'm feeling good and find a comfortable climbing cadence. Wow! I'm moving through a large number of riders, but there are still 60 or so ahead of me. As we finally crest the hill we get a magnificent view of the snow covered mountains.....one in particular seems to be totally covered in snow and another next to it only has the top half snow-capped. "Why is it so?" We are now past the half-way mark...average speed still on the 32.4kph. Looking good, but what if the wind gets up and hits us on the nose? What if I tire and the average drops

back a bit? What if...? Gee, I'd love a pee! Don't think about it and the urge will go away... Oh! Yeah!

The next 25 km. over "undulating" ground passes quickly, as the temperature moves up slowly. Keep that water supply up and don't dehydrate.

I open my first energy bar. Never had one of these before, Munch! I take a huge mouthfull to stop part of it falling on the road...my mouth is choc a block with dry, crumbly, rather uninteresting grainy bar. I take a slug of water to try to wash it down and nearly choke. Do I spit it out or keep chewing? Hang on to it, your body needs it. I finally get it all down and figure I've earned the other half of the banana. Man, does that taste SOOOO good.

86km. and Monster hill no. 2 is coming up. No problem if it's like the last one. Hell, I'm really bursting for a pee...The peleton catches up with some earlier hot-shots who are grinding up the hill. Our peleton is now over a hundred riders. This is a cracker-jack hill. I'm wondering just how many riders there are ahead and how many more we're likely to catch? Riders coming from behind were non-existent after the first 50or 60 km. I find that for some reason no one seems to wanrt to ride on the metre of bitumen to the left of the white-line along the road edge. I cruise up there calling out occasionally "coming inside" A rather provocative call, but what the hell! I find myself in the front half of the peleton again and notice that it is again splitting up as we progress up the hill. We crest the hill and get an awe-inspiring view of Lake Taupo.....the first time since the start. We're on the descent and we're really hiking. A few small rises, but there's more down than up. My bottles are lasting well and I don't feel any heat stress.

My special "hat" which clips to my helmet and shields my ears and neck from the sun is working a treat. I've cut the top out of it so that my scalp can breathe and remain cool and well ventilated in my helmet. Gee I'd love a pee!

At exactly 100km I let out a little cheer to myself...only 60km to go! We're cruising down hill at 55/60kph and the road is particularly bumpy...don't come off here, and give a clear berth to other riders in case they do. A bus is coming up the other way when i hit a bump really hard and my handlebars suddenly pivot back towards me. I've been on the brakes to monitor my down-hill speed and to ensure I don't have to swing wide on the bends, particularly with all of the uphill traffic coming up the other way.

My hands are now at the wrong angle to activate the brakes. Damn! This is not a good situation. I carefully reposition my hands and try some gentle braking, trying to avoid putting too much pressure on the handle-bars causing them to move any more. I slowly manage to pull over to the side of the road. I get off quickly and rush for the scrub for that long awaited .....Peeeeeeeee!

Then it's out with the allen keys and really tighten those bars. 2 minutes later I'm away and trying to catch the main peleton I've been working with......Fat chance!!! At the100km mark the average was 32.7kph. I catch a few stragglers and try working with them but now every-one is getting tired and those that I catch are sitting on 29 to 30. The course is now flat with a head wind of around 10/15kph. This is exactly the time you need a peleton.

What to do? Have a banana! Go it alone or slow and wait for another to come through? (and watch my average speed go down the toilet). Crank it up legs says brain...so away we go. The next 30 km was bloody hard, and with no assistance. The average dropped off to 32.2kph. Then a small peleton came in to view. Catch them and sit on them. Mission accomplished, but their speed is only 31/32. Go to the front and drag them along and then pull over and hope the next guy will keep it going...speed now around 32/33...that's a little better.

All of a sudden we're at 136km AND Hatepe hill with it's little sign about low gear, head down and don't look up. There's grumblings from those around me, but I figure if this is the last Monster hill, there's only 21 km after we crest it and then it's basically down-hill from there AND we'll have a tail wind for the last 20km. The tail end of my original "lost peleton" is struggling up the hill. Take the same line as the last hill and move up steadily on the inside lane. I must try another saddle when I get back to Aus. This one is certainly no lounge chair after 4 hours. Think posative. This hill is nowhere near as steep as Thredbo or the Alpine classic. Hey we're passing heaps of guys and spinning nicely on that lovely 26...slip it up a cog, think of that coffe and muffin waiting, "What will we have for dinner tonight? Definitely fish and a nice bottle of lovely cold white....maybe a frosty cold beer first!

We're over the top. Wasn't too bad. What's the average.? Still 32.2kph. Downhill. Give it to it legs, and away we goooooo. Everyone has got the sniff of home. Some are too rooted to do anything more than push the pedals in a token fashion, but others are like me and want to crack the 5 hours. A small peleton forms and we're rocketing along at 40/42...this'll pull the average up. A guy alongside me tells me there's one more small hill to go. I don't want this information. We find the small hill at about 10km from the finish. It's reatively minor in the overall scheme of things, but slows the peleton down. I'll be the rabbit and hit the front and some-one can take it once we hit the top. I look around, for assistance as we clear the crest...No-one home. Happy Days! Crank it up legs, we're nearly there and I want a sub 5 hour time or else..says brain. The last few kms. went really quickly, the average speed eased up. According to my watch I should hit the finish line around 12.55 which was a very definite sub 5 hr.

There's the finishing gate with the clock above it showing 12.57. My transponder gives it's beep and it's all over.

Official time yet to be confirmed, but 4 hours and 52 minutes...average speed 33kph. I must recalibrate my odometer as it reads a little slow.Wazza comes in and we head off for our "bowl" of latte... It's the "in" thing over there, you can have a cup, a mug or a bowl.

A great ride. Not as hard as the Alpine Classic.

Sitting on the saddle for 5 hours non-stop (except for 2 minutes) is VERY HARD on the bum and on the bladder.

Pacing yourself is most important AND sitting with the right peleton is imperative. This took probably 30km to sort out, purely because of the numbers involved. There's lots of overtaking and catching up in the first half, but after 80km it's mainly a case of riders being dropped off.

Carry plenty of water...I had 3/4 bottle left at the finish BUT a really hot day would soon have seen that consumed, I'm a great believer in mixing my own carbo and electrolyte....and whilst icarried a leppin bottle, I only cosumed a couple of mouthfulls (towards the end to ensure no cramps, etc, )

Travelling with WAZZA is very entertaining and interesting.

The results are on the webwww.poprun.co.nz

Poppa Smurff No 1857

Wazza no. 1856

Regards Poppa Smurff

HEY BANDIDOS.

I just sent my monologue to y'all on the Lake Taupo Challenge and looked up the Web-site to check the results. Found out I won the Old Farts VET 4 section and came in 116th overall with the time of 4hours 53 minutes. Couldn't go to bed without bragging about that!! Kerith's on the Great Vic Bike Ride so I can't even tell her! Geez, I might go out on a training ride now to celebrate.

cheers

[ Poppa Smurff ]