We go to School!

 

Laura: (in the cool Gir voice) I LOVEDED YOU CHICKEN! I LOVEDED YOU!

Danielle: Your chicken is at your house.

Chris: Don’t remind me, it tries to act like a rooster. Unfortunately, it’s good at the imitation.

Laura: You can’t please everybody.

Chris: Your chicken starts acting like a rooster at 2 in the morning!

Laura: So.

Danielle: You’re hopeless.

Jen: I’m a leprechaun!

Danielle: Correction, YOU’RE BOTH HOPELESS!
Jen: I bet you can’t find my pot of gold.

Laura: What if it’s a pot of pot?

Everyone except Laura: What?

Laura: Never mind.

Jaime and Lucy walk into homeroom late (ok we’re not in the same H.R. or on the same team but, you know what? We’re going to pretend we are. If there are any problems that you want to discuss about this… RECONSIDER!).

Substitute H.R. teacher (don’t ask me, who it is, but, let’s make it interesting, mostly because, if I don’t make it like this, it won’t have a good story line. So, I warn you now, PREPARE YOURSELF!): * turns around * Hello! My name is Nakuru, I’ll be your sub for today. * turns and sees Jaime, Chris, Danielle, Jen, Laura and Lucy and its mouth drops (along with Jaime, Chris, Danielle, Jen Laura and Lucy). *

The bell to leave H.R. rings, everyone leaves except for everyone just mentioned (I don’t feel like copy and pasting and writing the names over and over, so, I’ll just put  J.H,C.M,D.F,L.F,J.M,L.C. If you can’t figure out the initials, than go away, YOU’RE STILL READING! GO AWAY!). J.H,C.M,D.F,L.F,J.M,L.C all walk up to Nakuru.

Danielle: What are you doing in public?

Nakuru: Teaching, not causing chaos.

Lucy: When you were ‘expecting’, who were you expecting with? Yue, Eriol, Li, Kero, Suppi, or Tomoyo?

Nakuru: Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!

Laura: You’re in denial.

Nakuru: Wait, I’m the sub, * evil smile appears on its’ face (this can’t be good, or could it, only I know, you can obtain the knowledge if you read AND if you sing the doom song. Well, you don’t have to sing the doom song, but, GIR IS SO CUTE!) * you’re all going down to the dean.

                                                **************************

In the dean’s office.

Jen: Revenge will be obtained.

Chris: You want to battle, don’t you?

Laura: I LOVE BATTLES!
Danielle: Congratulations, Laura.

Chris: You know what, I’ll just watch.

Jen: You like being down in the dean?
Jaime: And for not doing anything wrong?

Laura: I like revenge.

Danielle: Laura, we’re on to a new conversation now.

The dean comes over to where everyone is sitting (well, I don’t know what happens in the dean’s office because (you might need someone to catch you for this next part), believe it or not, I’ve never gotten in trouble in school!).

Mr. Nobile: What did you do?

Lucy: Nothing, the, I don’t know what to call the shim.

Laura: You’re such an idiot Lucy!

Danielle: (under her breath) This isn’t going to end well.

Chris: The substitute-

Jaime: (in a pretend cough) Prostitute.

Chris: The substitute teacher sent us down here because she knew as from somewhere else and was mad.

Jen: It didn’t happen in school.

Mr. Nobile listens to them saying why they shouldn’t be there.

Jaime: Ok, we’re so screwed.

After they all finished talking.

Mr. Nobile: You all have detention.

At the end of the day, after detention is over.

J.H,C.M,D.F,L.F,J.M,L.C all see Nakuru waking out of the school and all chase after it.

Nakuru: * turns around * so, how was detention?

Laura: MY CHICKEN’S PROBABLY HAVING A HEART ATTCK! IT’S NOT USED TO BEING HOME ALONE FOR SO LONG!

Nakuru: Not my problem.

Laura: GET YOUR FREAKS! WE’RE BATTLING RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW!
Jen: Uh, Laura, we’re in the middle of the parking lot and the late buses (the ones that come to pick up those people that play sports) will be coming.

Laura: OVER THERE RIGHT OVER THERE RIGHT NOW!

Laura runs over to the field. Everyone else walks over.

Laura: CALL THOSE FREAKS! WE’RE BATTLING!

Lucy: You’re too redundant.

Yue flies out of a window on the third floor.

Nakuru: (yells up at Yue) GET YOUR WINGED ASS DOWN HERE!
Yue: What?

Nakuru: Are you blind? THE PUNKS WANT TO TRY TO BATTLE US AGAIN! HA!

Chris: Punks? Is that the best you can come up with?

Danielle: Yeah that’s really retarded.

Jaime: STOP FIGHTING VERBALLY! Nothing will come from fighting this way, it needs to be physical.

Sakura, Li, Tomoyo and Eriol all walk out of the school (that might have been hard for you to read, BUT IT WAS REALLY HARD FOR ME TO TYPE!).

Nakuru: (yells to them) HEY OVER HERE! OVER HERE! WE GOT TO BATTLE THE POTHEADS!
J.H,C.M,D.F,L.F,J.M,L.C: WHAT!?

Laura: Don’t take your drug use out on us!

Sakura, Li, Tomoyo and Eriol walk over onto the field.

Yue: Ok, let’s battle…again.

Nakuru: It’ll be Danielle vs. Sakura, Chris vs. Li, Jen vs. Yue-

Yue: WHAT!

Jen: I have to fight against Mr. I don’t have a clue because my head’s stick-

Everyone except Jen: WE GET THE POINT!

Jen: You don’t have to be all attitudey about it.

Yue: That’s not a word.

Jen: SHUT UP, WARTHOG!

Nakuru: Anyway, Jaime vs. Tomoyo, Laura vs. Eriol and Lucy vs. Me.

Lucy: Which you, freak you (meaning Nakuru), or freakier you (meaning Ruby Moon)?

Nakuru: That was uncalled for.

Chris: And going to the dean wasn’t?

Jaime: FIGHT ALREADY!

Bell: * the song ‘Bittersweet Symphony’ (from the movie ‘Cruel Intentions’) starts playing *  

Laura: That movie was wrong, it was so wrong!

Danielle: Oh, come on, Laura, you liked the tonguing it part.

Laura: THAT WAS SICK!

Sakura: Are you going to forfeit.

Danielle: Forfeit, against you, that’s just funny.

Sakura: What’s that supposed to mean?

Danielle: It’s so easy to beat you.

Sakura: No it’s not!

Danielle: Right.

Sakura: Yeah.

Danielle: Right.

Sakura: NOOOOOOOOOOOO! NOT THIS AGAIN! (I wrote a battle, Danielle vs. Sakura, she’s using the old tactic)

Danielle: Right.

Sakura: Mirror, didn’t work and neither did the silent.

Danielle: Right.

Sakura: I can still beat you somehow.

Danielle: Right.

Sakura: I’ll use the illusion!
Danielle: Right.

Sakura: * releases her wand * Reveal Danielle’s greatest fear, ILLUSION!

Danielle: Right.

Illusions goes out of its’ card form. As soon as it tries to show Danielle’s greatest fear, it goes back as a card.

Danielle: I don’t fear anything! Right!

While Sakura’s standing in disbelief, Danielle picks up a garbage can, dumps the garbage on Sakura’s head (and in the garbage is a dead squirrel, and not the one that Danielle, Jaime and I (Lucy) have all seen and tried to show Laura).

Sakura: EWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

Danielle walks over to one of the lacrosse people, takes their lacrosse stick thingy. She walks back over to Sakura and pegs her in the stomach.

Everyone except CCS group and Danielle: Yeah, Danielle won!

Li: Try your luck Chrissie boy!

Danielle: Ok, how freakin gay did that sound?

Chris: What the hell does ‘Chrissie boy’ mean.

Lucy: Sounds like a pet name.

Li: I DIDN’T MEAN IT LIKE THAT!

Laura: YOU TAKE EVERYTHING THE WRONG WAY!
Lucy: Yup.

Bell: RRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLL OOOOOOOUUUUUUUUTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Chris: I’m just going to pretend that made sense.

Li takes out his sword.

Chris: I all ready get an impression on how you feel about gun control.

Li: What’s that supposed to mean?   

Chris: Forget it.

Jaime: The bell rang, do you plan to fight?

Li takes out an ofuda.

Li: God of Thunder!

A flash of lightning comes out of the sky (coming right down toward Chris). Chris walks to the side and the lightning misses him.

Li: That was pointless.

Chris: Yeah.

Li: I’ll just have to try harder.

Li runs over to Chris and gets ready to attack him with his sword (but when he’s running, he’s sort of leaning forward). Chris walks out of the way again and sticks his foot out, tripping Li.  Li goes flying face forward onto the ground and his sword gets stuck in the ground. Li gets up and tries to get his sword out of the ground. All of the sudden two losers come by (and I know who you’re probably thinking and, no, it’s not the wildabeest).

Tomoyo: Who are those people.

Laura: OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO! THEY’RE HOLDING HANDS AND SKIPPING!

Jaime: Oh my god!

Jen: It’s loser Molly and… It’s loser Molly!

Danielle: Who is that?

Lucy: Judging by there being one loser the other loser would probably be-

Jaime: UMI!

Lucy: HEY I WAS GOING TO SAY THAT!

Laura: They’re a match made in heaven.

While Li’s distracted watching the two losers go by and pulling his sword out of the ground, Chris takes advantage of that and starts strangling Li.

Everyone except the CCS group and Chris: (starts laughing).

Li falls unconscious.

Danielle: That was a new side of you.

Chris: No ones like defeat.

Jen: True, true.

Nakuru: ERRRRRRRRRRR! (in other words Nakuru is really pissed) Go and fight, Yue. AND YOU’D BETTER WIN!

Yue: Shut up.

Jen: No one can win against a leprechaun! You can’t get my pot of gold HAHAHAHA!!!

Yue: Ok then.

Bell: YYYYYUUUUUUUUUEEEEEEEEE’SSSSSSSSS OOOOONNNNNNNNNN PPPPPPPPPPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!

Everyone: WHAT THE HELL?

Molly (who comes skipping over with her soul mate, Umi): I programmed the bell! (laughs in a retarded way).

Umi: Molly, come on we have to find Lisa so we can try to talk in Japanese even though we don’t know what we’re saying and we’re retards who like saying have a peach-keen day!
Lucy: SHUT THE HELL UP YOU RETARDED ASSHOLES!

Umi: I know more Japanese than you people! You’re just jealous.

Jaime: That’s it I’m killing her.

Jaime runs up to Umi and starts beating the shit put of her.

Umi: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Molly helps Umi get away from Jaime and they both run away screaming and crying.

Yue: The bell rang and Jen wasn’t fighting me.

Chris: You’ll get over it, I’m sure of it.

Yue: Oh, shut up.

Chris: Do you know how gay you sound.

Yue: I all ready battled you once.

Chris: And who won that again, I don’t remember.

Jen: Ok thank you, this is my battle BACK OFF!

Laura: Ok then.

Jen: Someone ring the bell again!

Bell: AAAAGGGGGGAAAAAAAAIIIIINNNNN???????????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jen: Prepare to eat dust wing boy!
Yue: Why does everyone always target my wings for insults?

Jen takes one of her shoes off and starts swinging it (by the laces, but I hope you knew that, because if you weren’t… What were you thinking of?).

Yue: Is there a point to that?

Jen starts walking toward Yue.

Yue: What are you doing?

Nakuru: YOU’RE SO FREAKIN BRAIN DEAD YUE!
Yue: Wha-

 Jen starts hitting Yue with her shoe.

Jen: DIE YOU-UM…DIEEEEEEEEEEE!

Jen takes her other shoe off and starts beating Yue like he’s a snare drum (what can I say, it’s not like a pay attention in band to what the rest of the trumpets (not to mention, none of them are that cute) are doing.  THERE’S A CUTE GUY WHO PLAYS THE DRUMS! So I notice these things). Jen starts trying to rip Yue’s wing off.

Yue: LET GO OF MY WINGS!
Jen: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!

Tomoyo: I have a slight feeling that Yue’s unconscious.

Jen: You really think so?

Jen looks down at Yue (who’s half-dead) and sees he is all bruised.

Jen: (in a weird sort of Irish guy voice) The deed is done.

Laura: You’re not a leprechaun Jen.

Jen: You just can’t find my pot of gold.

Everyone (who’s not unconscious or half-dead): SHUT UP JEN!

Tomoyo: It’s go time, Jaime!

Jaime: I never really understood what that meant. IT’S JUST SO STUPID!
Bell: (starts playing Amish Paradise, that song is so freakin funny!)

Danielle: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Lucy: How could you not like this song?

Danielle: (who’s banging her head against a dumpster) IT’S SO ANNOYING!

Laura: No wonder it doesn’t affect us.

Tomoyo takes out her led pipe and starts running toward Jaime.

Jaime: How old is this?

Jen: We all play nice in an Amish paradise!
Jaime: Shut up Jen.

Tomoyo tries to hit Jaime with her led pipe. Jaime sees her and kicks her in the shin.

Tomoyo: OWW!
Jaime kicks her other shin.

Jen: We don’t fight in an Amish Paradise.

Jaime: SHUT UP JEN!
Jen: Ok, ok.

Tomoyo kicks Jaime in the shin.

Jaime: HEY!
Jaime takes Tomoyo’s led pipe out of her hand and hits her over the head with it (while she’s jumping up and down with one hand rubbing her kicked shin). Jaime hits her again and again. (See isn’t Jaime a nice person? Well she normally is (than again she made her sister drink out of the toilet), like I said, Jaime normally (not always, than again who is, especially when you have sibling whose name starts with a ‘J’) is nice).

Tomoyo: I FORFEIT! YOU KILLED SO MANY BRAIN CELLS!
Laura: (to Lucy) You know what’s that like.

Lucy: Yeah, I know!

Nakuru: NEXT BATTLE!
Laura: (in the cool way she says it) OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD! I’M GOING TO BE BATTLING! (in a Gir voice) OH MY GOD!
Eriol: Shut up!
Laura: Uh, no.

Bell: CCCCCCCCCCCAAAAAAAALLLLLLIIIIIIIIFFFFFFFFFOOOOOOOOOORR-RRNNNNNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCCCCCCCCCCCAAAAAAAAAATTT-TTIIIIIIIIOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Eriol: Ok, I’m used to hearing these things that make no sense what so ever.

Jen: How could you say that about Amish Paradise?
Eriol: That was probably the most screwed up one.

Jen: YOU STUPID-

Laura: Jen, this is my battle! I’ll kill him!
Danielle: That song is horrible though.

Jen: TRAITOR!
Danielle: Get over it Jen, the song sucks.

Laura: It’s hard to get revenge while talking!

Eriol releases his sun staff.

Lucy: Look out, he’s armed and dangerous.

Laura: You say it with such enthusiasm.

Danielle: Well you can beat him, he only has a pointy staff.

Eriol: You call it a ‘pointy staff’?

Danielle: Problem?

Eriol: Pointy staff?

Danielle: What’s the fascination with these words?

Laura: Can you all shut up, I’m trying to battle here.

Eriol possesses a lacrosse player and makes him start to attack Laura.

Laura: (in a really, REALLY, REALLY pitched voice) BACK OFF!

Lacrosse player dude: Dude, what happened dude? I’m confused dude.

Laura: Don’t dude me!
Lacrosse player dude: I gotta dude SEE YA DUDE!

The lacrosse player dude runs away back to practice.

Sakura: Was there a point to that?

Eriol: It back fired.

Laura takes out her furby (the one where you pull it’s tail and it starts shaking, not to mention when you hold it against someone’s arm or hand, it looks wrong, very wrong).

Laura: I HAVE A FURBY!

Eriol looks at his staff.

Laura: SHOW OFF!
Laura pulls the tail on the furby, throws it and watches it starts going down Eriol’s shirt. (And since it looks very wrong, think of how it looks down a shirt)Eriol rips the furby out of his shirt. He possesses the furby. The furby starts walking toward Laura.

Laura: That’s so freakin retarded.

Laura kicks the furby and sends it flying into one of the track player’s heads and starts being wrongful.

Laura: That all you got?

Eriol starts possessing a tree but, before he can Laura picks up half-dead Yue and starts attacking Eriol with him (I’ll just let your minds draw their own conclusions of how Laura beats Eriol up, now aren’t you all lucky?). Laura knocks Eriol out.

Laura: I AM VICTORIOUS!

Nakuru: YOU STILL HAVE TO BEAT ME!
Lucy: Is that supposed to be hard?

Nakuru (turns into Ruby Moon): Yes.

Lucy: You’re a conceited freak.

Bell: DDDDDDDDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMM DDDDDDDDDDOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMDDDOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Laura: THE DOOM SONG! YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY!

Chris: You get excited over the oddest things.

Lisa walks over to Chris and stares at him.

Chris: GET OUT OF MY FACE LISA!
Lisa: You actually said something to me!

Danielle: GO AWAY!
Laura starts yelling at Lisa in a high-pitched gibberish.

Lisa runs away terrified.

Ruby Moon: You’re all getting detention!

Lucy walks over to Ruby Moon with a big pair of scissors and (literally) clips it’s wings.

Ruby Moon: THAT HURT!
Lucy: I get pleasure from inflicting pain on others, THAT’S WHY MY FAVORITE GAME’S MERCY!

Ruby Moon gets ready to shoot its crystals.

Lucy: OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO! SHINY!

Lucy touches the crystals and screws everything up.

Ruby Moon: YOU DESTROYED MY ATTACK!

Lucy: Does it look like a care? NO!

Lucy takes Ruby Moon’s/ Nakuru’s  brief case and bashes Ruby Moon over the head with it.

Ruby Moon: We all lost anyway, I QUIT!

Jaime: Now-

Jen: For the last time.

Everyone that’s not the CCS group or playing lacrosse: STAY HIDDEN FROM THE PUBLIC!

CCS group: (groans).

Everyone leaves.

Jen: (starts singing Amish Paradise).

Everyone: SHUT UP JEN!

                                                                       

 

The End