Marriage of the Will
By Eternity Rose
E-mail: [email protected]
Rated: PG-13
Author's Notes: None
Standard Disclaimer: I do not own Sailor Moon.
Chapter 12
August 3rd...
So many months since I left, Serena thought as she stared at a photo of her and Darien on their wedding day. They had even taken a photo. She didn't find it until she started searching through her closet for a sweater. It was starting to get cold again as fall approached. Then winter. Then November 25th. The last day of their arrangement, then they could divorce.
Isn't today Darien's birthday? Serena wondered as she traced the chiseled features of her "husband". She sighed and closed her eyes as more tears slipped down her cheek. He got me something on my birthday. Then he took it away.
Screaming frustration, Serena shoved the photo into the very bottom of her bottom dresser draw and pulled on a beige sweater. She had been sitting in only her bra and khaki pants for too long.
Standing up, Serena walked over to the mirror and redid her odangos. She wrapped black ribbons around them and went back to her bed. She had just taken a bath and felt very refreshed. She didn't know why she put on black ribbons though. She wasn't going out any time soon. She hadn't gone out in months since Beryl's death. The press was everywhere. Bothering all of Serena's friends and family. Even poor Mr. Knight, Darien, Raye and Setsuna! But now it had all died down and she was at peace again. Her mother hadn't been tried with murder since it was self defense and everything was left alone.
Maybe because black is Darien's favorite color? A little voice said inside of her. Maybe your secretly celebrating his birthday?
"Go away!" Serena whispered harshly as she clamped her hands over her ears. "Just go away. I don't need YOU to torture me as well!"
The voice went away.
Serena relaxed and pulled out her lap top. She had been working from her lap top since she left Darien's mansion. She didn't want to see him at the office and she didn't feel like leaving the safeness of her home. Her mother and her had began to talk again and they had became very close. Closer than they had ever been before and that gave Serena a very nice feeling. Her and her mother were no longer strangers but the best of friends.
At least things are turning out right between me and Mother. I wish it was like that for me and Darien. But I'm a coward. I'm too afraid to confront him. Serena sighed as she knew the truth and began to work. It was all she had left to keep herself busy. She had gotten some servants to buy crafts and such for her to do. She had made lanyards, ribbons, sewed a few samplers. All the old fashion kind of things that she had been taught when she was eight.
She had even started writing poems and little short stories of love and romance but it always ended pretty sadly. She just didn't feel happy any more.
I know why now some women and men avoid marriage. It only brings sorrow. It traps you and makes you miserable. I was happier before this. I wish I could be that happy again. But it's lost. That pure happiness. Gone forever, never to return. What a bitch, Serena thought bitterly as she continued to type.
Half way through the night, she had dinner. Then stopped working for the day and went to bed.
~*~
Raye stabbed her fork into the chocolate birthday cake she had bought her brother and brought it to her ruby red lips. She licked it before stuffing it into her mouth and chewed. It was delicious but it didn't help her disposition.
"What's the matter?" Jadeite asked from across the kitchen table.
"Darien is a self-absorbed, arrogant, dense ass-hole," Raye sighed as she brought another piece of cake to her mouth.
Jadeite blinked and dropped his fork. He wiped his mouth with a napkin and looked up at his beloved. "Oookay. Why?"
"Because he won't go back to Serena," Raye bit out, suddenly filled with anger and vigor. Her violet eyes flashing. "He loves her and not being near her is killing him! He just won't admit he's dying without her. I know he wished she was here with him tonight but he's too proud to admit it."
"Love takes time, Raye," Jadeite reminded her. "Remember how we met?"
"We hated each other," Raye chuckled.
"But then we knew we were meant to be and fell in love," Jadeite finished.
"Yeah. But is it the same with Darien and Serena?" Raye asked, licking her lips free of the white cake icing.
"Yes. They'll realize that they love each other with some time," Jadeite said confidently.
Raye shook her head. "The divorce is in TWO months. They've had almost a year. When will they fall in love? Or fall back in love?--I'm so confused. Damn them!"
Jadeite eyed Raye suspiciously. "Don't do anything, Raye. Don't push them. They need to do this on their own."
Raye stuck her tongue out at him. "Fine!"
"Good. Now let's finish this delicious cake and go to bed," Jadeite suggested with a certain spark in his blue eyes.
"Ooh...you!" Raye laughed as she quickly finished her cake and followed Jadeite back up to her room.
~*~
Darien sighed and closed his eyes as he got underneath the covers and pulled his blanket up over his head. He waited as his mind darkened and fell asleep...
---
He was holding her. She fit perfectly against his body. Her wonderful unique light scent reached his nose, teasing him with it. She giggled and snuggled deeper into his embrace. They were watching the beautiful sunset over the ocean. It was a wondrous sight and filled both of them with a strange feeling of contentment.
"Oh, Darien," she sighed dreamily. "I love you."
"I love you too, Serena," Darien murmured in her ear. He kissed the ear and trailed his lips down, landing gentle kisses on exposed skin. She giggled and twisted in his arms.
"Darien!" She laughed.
"Serena," he murmured as he held her.
"Darien, we're never going to be together, will be?" Serena suddenly asked in a sad voice.
"What?" Darien exclaimed.
Serena stepped out of his warm embrace, still looking out in the ocean as the sun continued to lower. "We'll never be together, Darien. We're too distanced. Soon the divorce will happen and we'll go our separate ways." Serena turned around. Darien tried to see her face but it remained shadowed.
"No, my love, we'll stay together," Darien promised. "Now. Come back to me." He reached out for her when suddenly a gun shot rang and Serena gasped as a red stain appeared where her heart was. Her white dress was soon soaked in blood as she fell forward. Darien caught her in his arms.
"Serena! Serena!" Darien shouted over and over as he held his dying love. "Serena, stay with me!"
"She'll never have your heart, Darien! It's mine!" Beryl's voice hissed.
"No!" Darien screamed.
---
"No!" Darien shot up in bed and found his sheets tangled around his long legs and the sunlight pouring into his bedroom, making everything just way too bright. He closed his eyes, groaned and fell back down on to his damp pillow.
Another damn nightmare, he thought ruefully. It just never ends. Serena dies every time. Does it really mean we can't be together?
Well, screw it!
Darien got out of bed and changed into his suit and tie and went downstairs to find Raye and Jadeite tickling each other mercilessly. The breakfast burning on the stove.
"You two had a good night?" Darien asked dryly as he sat down and opened up the morning paper.
Raye blushed and Jadeite ducked his head.
"Go away, Darien," Raye said darkly, but there was no bite in it. She was far too happy to deal with her brother's evil moods. She took the breakfast off the stove before it burned and served it to her boys. "You going to work, Darien?"
"Yes," Darien replied as he sipped his coffee.
"Aren't you going to take a break?" Raye asked.
"In the business world, there are no breaks, Raye," Darien said. He looked at Jadeite. "Pass the salt."
Jadeite reached for the salt and passed it to Darien who sprinkled it light on to his eggs.
"What about your love life?" Raye asked abruptly.
Suddenly Darien lost his appetite. He pushed back his untouched food and stood up. "I'm going to work now. See you both tonight." Then he picked up his brief case and left.
"Did you have to do that?" Jadeite sighed.
"Yes," Raye snapped. "He needs to learn."
"Class dismissed," Jadeite murmured as he ate his own eggs.
~*~
November 19...
Six more days...Serena thought a bit sadly as she looked out the window and up at the crescent moon. Six more days and their arrangement would be fulfilled. Afterwards they could file for divorce papers and leave it at that. They would still work together and own the business together but they were both going to go and do different things. Darien would probably get married...What will I do? Work. It's the only thing I have left.
Quit being so pathetic, Serena! Her inner mind scolded her. Your much more stronger than this. Just because Darien doesn't love you doesn't mean you have to give up! Be strong!
Serena leaned her head against the side of her window seat and closed her eyes. How can I be strong when all my strength was taken by that man? He took my heart and my energy in one swipe. Before I could do anything to protect it. Love bites.
But I'll at least stop it, Serena decided as she opened her eyes, straightened a bit and looked up at the crescent moon. I can be the first one to decide the divorce. It's about time I stop letting people do things for me and do it myself. She knew it was going to hur preparing the divorce papers but she was going to do it before Darien. She was going to be in charge of this, even if it is killing her.
~*~
"Are you sure about this, Serena?" Amy asked uncertainly as she helped her friend set up the divorce papers. She was in town and Serena had asked her for help since she didn't know much of legal stuff. Of course Amy didn't know anything about divorces since she had never had one but she was determined to help her friend. Even though she didn't think it was the right thing.
Serena loved Darien. That was clear and true. But both were too stubborn and arrogant to admit to it. Amy wished she could do something to help but she was helpless. She didn't know much of how to deal with two people who were exactly alike.
"I'm sure," Serena said firmly as she read through papers and such. "I don't want to be hurt anymore, Amy. I just want it to end."
Amy sighed and nodded. "All right. But I really think you should give it another try with Darien."
"Why? So he could hurt me again? Oh, Amy, I don't want to be hurt by the men I love in my life. I loved my father and he left, I loved Darien and he left."
"But with Darien it's different."
"How?"
"You can take him back if you only give in."
"To what? He doesn't even trust me!"
"Do you trust him?"
Serena looked away and closed her eyes. "If he only gave me a good excuse I would have forgiven him right away. But he came in yelling and I just can't forgive that. I was going to ask him about it, quiet and civilized. He comes in yelling, already accusing."
"Serena, I know it hurts. I've had arguments with Greg in the past but if you truly love him you'll work through this."
"I'm sorry, Amy, but I don't think so," Serena said quietly.
Amy sighed helplessly. What could she do?
~*~
Darien picked up a large envelope and glanced at the return address. It was from some agency...He ripped it open and pulled out the papers. He glanced at them and knew immediately they were the divorce papers. How the hell did Serena move so quick??
It was only a day after their wedding day and already Serena was eager to divorce. Why? Does she HATE me that much? Darien wondered as he read the divorce papers. It was pretty simple. Serena didn't demand anything. She just wanted a divorce. And it wasn't like Serena needed anything. She already had everything she wanted. She never was the greedy type since I first met her, Darien reflected a bit sadly as he continued to read the papers.
A soft knock on the door brought Darien out of his thoughts and reading.
"Come in," he called out.
The door opened and Amy Carlston walked into his office. Darien frowned. Amy was Serena's best friend. What was she doing here?
"I see you've already gotten the divorce papers. It's very simple isn't it? Not very demanding," Amy said quietly.
"No." Darien looked at Amy and raised an eyebrow. "What brings you here?"
"Serena," Amy said simply. "Darien, you and her have got to make up. It's hurting you both if you don't forgive each other and love each other again."
"Spare me, Amy. I've had this from my whole family and it's done nothing to change my mind," Darien said exasperatingly. He was getting sick and tired of this. Why was everything bothering HIM?
"I'm not going to spare you," Amy answered firmly. "Serena still loves you, Darien. You have go to take the first step."
"Why me?"
"Because you started this, you've got to end it. You had no right accusing Serena of cheating on you with Seiya. It pains her that you don't trust her."
"She thought I was with Beryl."
"That's because you offered her no explanation. She would have accepted and forgive you on the spot if you had only told her what really happened. I've talked to Seiya and he said when he found Serena that day she was crying her heart out. The poor girl was hurt bad, Darien."
Darien looked out the window. He hated hearing Serena was in so much pain. And because of him. It was only better they separated. Then he wouldn't have to risk hurting her any more. It was just best for both of them.
"It's just better this way, Amy. Please," Darien pleaded, "no more of these kind of conversations. I've had enough."
Amy sighed and nodded. "Very well." Then she turned and left the room.
Darien settled back in his leather chair and sighed softly as he felt his heart shatter once again. "I love you, Serena. I'll leave so you won't be hurt ever again by me."
~*~
"Okay, I'm not going to be nervous. I'm going to be calm and cool. I'm going to be ice. God, I hope I don't melt under his stare," Serena said quietly to herself as she shakily tied white ribbons around her odangos. "I look like a child." She sighed and shook her head. It didn't matter. She liked looking this way.
Today she wore a loose white dress that wrapped around her small waist and had a very modest neckline. The sleeves dropped down to her wrists and came out just a bit more. The dress dropped down to her ankles and swished around them when she walked around. She wore white slippers with no socks.
Overall she looked like she had just stepped out of the Victorian times. But she didn't mind since she needed to be comfortable and white always eased her nerves. It was best she wore some to calm herself with the meeting she was going to have with Darien today. They were going to discuss the terms of the divorce, agree on them and sign the papers. Then they would be moving on forever. Never to look back. Hopefully.
Licking her dry lips, Serena rubbed some lip balm on them. She decided not to wear make up since she didn't think it was going to look good on. She was gaunt looking again. Just like she had been when her father died a year ago.
Has it really been a year? Time moves so fast, Serena thought sadly as she nervously smoothed down her dress. She picked up the folder with the divorce papers and walked downstairs and into the parlor where the meeting was going to take place. She placed the folder on the coffee table and sat down on the plush velvet couch as she tried to calm herself. She hadn't seen Darien in four months and that made her nervous. Would he be cold and distant to her because she had just up and left suddenly? It frightened her to confront Darien again.
But she steeled her resolve, determined to make it through the meeting with no trouble whatsoever. She was going to be strong and not weak. Never weak. It was something that could not be in a situation like this.
The door bell rang.
Serena gasped and jumped to her feet. She heard the butler answer the door and tell Darien to meet her in the parlor.
Please, let me make it through this without making a fool of myself, Serena prayed to whatever god who was listening. She tried to calm the deep, fast pounding of her heart but it just wouldn't stop! Taking a deep breath, Serena turned and looked at the door way to find Darien standing there.
She almost fainted. Stop being weak, Serena! she scolded herself. She took in Darien's handsome frame and saw that he didn't change much. He looked as handsome and charming as ever with his dark hair falling slightly into his midnight blue eyes. Whilst she had let him get to her and looked horrible. God, I am weak.
"Good afternoon, Darien," she said softly. She gestured to the chair across from hers. "Please. Sit. There is much we have to talk about." She turned to the maid standing not far behind Darien and ordered coffee and tea to be brought in. The maid nodded and disappeared.
Serena wished the maid would come back. She didn't like being in the same room as Darien. She was afraid she might reveal her true feelings. But since the maid wasn't coming back anytime soon, Serena steeled herself and sat down across from Darien. He was pulling out some papers from the briefcase he was carrying and placing them on top of the coffee table without a single word.
"So, all of what was written in the paper is as it should be?" He asked quietly.
Serena nodded. "Yes, exactly. I don't want anything since I already have money for it." She shrugged. "So, all we have to do is read the papers over and make sure they suit us both and sign them. Then we're done. We just turn them in and in a couple of months our divorce will be through and we can live our separate ways."
Separate ways. That hurt. Darien looked over to Serena who looked like a wilted flower. Just like she had been when he had first met her. Modest, pale and looking ready to drop dead in a faint on the spot. At least she wasn't the silent girl he had known before. She talked. But as Darien looked even more he still saw the beautiful life and innocence inside of her. She was still beautiful if wilt looking. He had to admit that. She would always be beautiful to him.
The maid came with the coffee and tea. She placed it on an empty spot of the coffee table and left without a single word.
"Do you prefer coffee or tea?" Serena asked as she reached for the tray of drinks.
"Coffee," Darien answered as he glanced at her long, pale arm which was reaching for the drinks. Didn't she ever go out? She was so white. More white than she had been when he first met her.
Serena picked up the coffee but she was so weak and didn't expect the weight of the cup that she spilled it. She gasped and dropped the cup as she brought her arm to her chest. She sat there, gasping as tears made their way down her cheek.
"Serena!" Darien cried out in alarm. In a flash he was by her side and cradling her close to his chest as she cried from the scalding pain. He lifted her into his arms and brought her to the kitchen where all the maids and butlers watched in astonishment that their mistress was being carried by her soon to be ex-husband in the most tenderest of ways.
The maid that had brought the coffee scooted all of the servants out of the room. Knowing that Miss Blackwood and Mr. Knight would want some time alone.
Serena allowed Darien to run water along her arm. She hissed through her teeth as the pain shook her. She stood there, leaning against Darien as he cooled down her burning arm. Never had she burned herself so bad. She was such a klutz and now she was paying for it.
"I'm such a klutz," she said painfully through tears. "Now the carpet is ruined and Mother won't be happy about that."
"Shush, Serena. Your hurt. Worry about the carpet later," Darien murmured close to her ear.
Serena felt herself melt under the soft, warm tone he used with her as he continued to rinse her arm out under the cold water. He felt so good pressed against her back. She wished she would never leave this position, ever. She felt her heart tighten and more tears came. He was being so gentle...So kind. She had thought he was going to scold her for being so stupid. He was just being so nice. Did he still love her? She hoped so very much.
"We have some burning ointment in there." Serena pointed to a draw and Darien took out the ointment. He turned her around to face him, uncapped the ointment and began to slowly rub the cool cream on Serena's red skin.
Serena closed her eyes as she enjoyed the cool cream that was soothing her burns. And the wonderful touch Darien had while he was tending to her.
"Thank you," she whispered as he finished.
"Hold on. We have one more thing to take care of." Darien lifted her back up into his arms and he carried her up to her bedroom. He placed her down on the bed and looked around. "I know there was a first aid kit around here. I saw it last time..." He trailed off and disappeared into the bathroom.
Serena rested against her pillows and looked down at her arm. It looked really bad. She gasped and tried not to cry. Why did she always hurt herself? It was so stupid. She wiped away tears from her eyes and sniffed shakily as she breathed in slowly. She felt so empty from all the crying. She hated it when she felt empty.
Darien reappeared with the little first aid kit in his hands and sat down beside Serena. Her wonderful scent reached his nose and he had to fight back temptation to bring her back into his arms. She felt so perfect there. He was half glad Serena had burned herself. She had allowed him to hold her and it was wonderful. She smelled so wonderful and felt wonderful against him.
Pulling out some bandages Darien began to very slowly, very gently wrap them around Serena's arm. He blew at the burn to cool it even further as he continued to work.
"Where did you learn how to do this?" Serena asked curiously as she wiped away some more wetness from her cheeks and eyes.
"I took a first aid class in high school," Darien replied, smiling slightly; a boyish smile.
Serena didn't think as she reached out with her left arm and brushed away some black hair that had fallen into his eyes while he wsa working. She gasped when she realized what she had done and was about to pull away when Darien caught her hand and held it. Her heart was suddenly beating hard enough to say she had ran from New York to Baltimore.
"Darien," she whispered wistfully as he held her hand. She looked down at her arm and saw that he had finished. She looked up back up at him and gasped softly.
Darien looked down at her with smoldering eyes. She could see desire burn clear in them and it made her shiver.
"I'm sorry," Darien whispered before his lips landed on hers. He held her close, his hand at the small of her back, as he continued to kiss her gently at first. Then with more passion and desire. Serena snaked her left arm around his neck and held him close as they kissed. She didn't dare bother with her right, it would be too painful.
They stayed tight in their embrace, simply kissing, for the longest time. It wasn't until their lungs demanded air did they pull apart. And even then, they kept their foreheads touching.
"So beautiful, so perfect," Serena murmured as she kissed him lightly on the lips before pulling away. She brushed away his hair and smiled at him. "Do you know how perfect you are?"
"Serena," Darien sighed wistfully. "Please forgive me. I never meant to hurt you so much. I was just so..."
"Jealous?" Serena filled in, happy to know that Darien got jealous if some other man touched her.
"Yes. Very jealous." Darien kissed her again and held her close. "Please, Serena. Let's not divorce. Let's marry again. I don't want to lose you. Your everything to me."
"Oh, Darien. I love you with all my heart. Just promise me that you'll never leave me, ever, for someone else. I need you so much. Your like my other half," Serena whispered through her tears.
Darien reached up and wiped the tears again before kissing them. "I'll never leave you. Never."
"Darien, I love you so much," Serena whispered as she hugged him close.
"I love you too, Serena," Darien said, smiling. He pulled her close and continued to kiss her breathless once again.
~*~
Yeah! Yeah! Whoo-hoo! I finished it!!! Yeah!! Oh yeah, I finally finished a story. I just loved writing this this story, so I hoped you all loved reading it as much so I enjoyed writing it. Thank you to everyone who has read this little story of mine. It's just another version of Serena and Darien's wonderful romance.
Eternity Rose