School Strategies – Tips for Parents

 

1.  WHAT STRATEGIES DO I FIND EFFECTIVE WHEN WORKING WITH MY CHILD'S SCHOOL ADVOCATING FOR HIM)?

• First of all, there should be a "case manager" - not the teacher or E.A. - who can act as an 'ombudsman ' type of person. You can express your concerns to HIM/HER, and so can other staff members. At my son's school, I contact the S.E.R.T. if there is a problem. He is Mark's CASE MANAGER.

• Secondly, be part of the 'team' for your child. Offer your services as an additional expert during brainstorming sessions about problems that may arise.  Never become a part of the blaming game.  This is counterproductive to your reputation and to your child.

If there is a problem that I am told about or that he has told me about, I first find out what my son is comfortable with. In the earlier years he was quite comfortable for me to spend a day as a 'visitor' in the class to observe any possible solutions. Now we discuss what can be done without me being visible to his peers. I brainstorm a solution with Mark and then with the S.E.R.T., keeping in mind that the solution can not infringe on the rights of others in the class, or make Mark stick out like a sore thumb.

2.  HAS MY POSITION AS A SCHOOL BOARD STAFF MEMBER MADE ME ADVOCATE DIFFERENTLY OR MADE ME SEE MY CHILD IN A DIFFERENT LIGHT?

My position as a 'front line worker' with special needs children allows me the perspective of the political setup of the classroom and the school. I understand just how much time and space is available to be given to each student. I especially see that the other children need to feel safe, and to be able to work in a quiet environment. If Mark has a tantrum, I would expect him to be removed from the class so that the other students could work and would not start resenting him.

3.  WHAT ARE THE BIGGEST OBSTACLES THAT TEACHERS FACE WHEN DEALING WITH PDD CHILDREN IN A CLASSROOM?

a.  BEHAVIOUR

If your child behaves inappropriately constantly, I would suggest the following steps be taken:

• Have the school board send in the Behaviour Person who specializes in PDD/Autism to make an observation and recommendations. Ask to be present when the report is being presented to staff.
• Ask for follow-up on the progress of the 'plan" (this could be a checklist sent home).
• If this doesn't work, get medical intervention - perhaps trying medication to lower anxiety - and/or assist the child with focusing on work.

If this doesn't work, then perhaps there should be a review of the placement.

b.  SOCIALIZATION

First, our kids often would rather play alone - so it is difficult to have them play with others.  Secondly, if we want our children to socialize, then they must be clean at all times, and dressed like all of the other kids. Don't let your grade 7 child go to school in Mickey Mouse T-shirts. Find out what is current in dress and in fads (now it is Pokemon for grade 3 and up and Teletubbies for the younger ones). Watch the cartoons with your child. Learn everything you can about this and discuss it with your child. My son is an electronic games expert. His first phone call from a peer was to get 'cheat codes' from him.

c.  FOLLOW-UP AT HOME
 

• One of my pet peeves occurs when I set up a visual system for a student, provide a second set for home, train staff at the school, only to later discover that it is not followed up at home.
• I know how difficult our kids are.  It is a full time job, but if boundaries are set at an early age, then you don't have a 6 foot 200 lb. teenager throwing a tantrum.
• Teach your child that NO means NO.

NEVER LET A TANTRUM BECOME THE METHOD OF COMMUNICATION!  THAT EMPOWERS THE CHILD - THINK OF THE FUTURE!!

4.  WHAT IS THE SECRET OF SUCCESS IN OBTAINING WHAT YOUR CHILD NEEDS IN THE EDUCATION SYSTEM?

• Stay calm when speaking to staff. If you feel you are getting hysterical, talk later when you have control.
• Know what you want to say, bring cue cards with the points you wish to discuss written out.
• Be proactive: Get everyone discussing the solutions to the problem rather than the cause (unless the cause is obvious and can be rectified in a non-threatening way.
• Understand the constraints that exist in the educational system. Be creative. Find a way to work within the boundaries that are not going to change.
• Learn everything you can about how our kids tick, share the information in point form.

SOCIAL STORIES:

• Learn how to make up social stories (include visuals). Offer these as methods to cue your child in social or anxiety producing situations.
• Use them to teach skills like 'getting dressed to go out', 'toileting' etc. and share with school staff.

BE A TEACHER TO THE TEACHERS:
...and remember, there are 25 other kids in the class, many of whom also have special needs.

5.  HOW CAN PARENTS PREPARE EFFECTIVELY FOR THE IPRC REVIEWS?

• Learn the terminology.
• Bring cue cards to help with your questions.
• Remember that this meeting is for:
• Identification diagnosis and legal exceptionality (C4-Autism)
• Placement-segregated class, 100% special class

-integrated setting, part special class/part regular class
-full inclusion, 100% 'regular' class ((type of support may or may not be mentioned at this meeting; I.E.P. may or may not be discussed at this meeting)

• Review Committee - meets once a year

CHECK THE PARENT HANDBOOK FOR SPECIAL EDUCATION AVAILABLE AT YOUR SCHOOL BOARD OFFICE OR YOUR SCHOOL!

In addition to her capacities as a School Board Staff Member, Parent, and Genetic Study Participant, Marilyn O'Brien is a Child Development and Behaviour consultant specializing in children with autism/PDD and developmental delays.  These school strategies were presented during our 'Teacher's Panel' at our Spring '99 conference.