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Shopping-Let's make this short cuz I can be mighty long-winded.� Another thing you can miss if you don't find it elsewhere is the opportunity to shop for vinyl.� I can admit it, I am a vinyl junkie.� I don't spin (though I tried to teach myself in between job firings in ATL and sold some wack mixtapes to finance a trip home from Rock Steady), but I collect and let me tell ya, aint nothin' like some good vinyl.� Note:� If there is a person out there named Jason Berry who used to live in Atlanta between 98 and 99 reading this right now, send me my Yellow Magic Orchestra Album please, no questions asked. Email me for the address ([email protected]).� Anyway, back to my point, vinyl shopping.� Now there's Gramaphone.� There's Dusty Groove.� There's Dr. Wax.� There's Second Hand Tunes.� There's Reckless.� There's Hi-Fi. Damn, I'm forgetting a lot of places, but since I'm so broke I can't afford to even look at vinyl right now. I can't expect myself to remember the others, so I'll come back to ya.�

Just to make it abundantly clear, I'm from the Chi (short for Chicago) and though I have my moments of regret and misery based on this simple fact, I really do love my city as much as one can love an inanimate entity.� Chicago has a shitload of things to offer that you simply can't find anywhere else.� I've written a cheesy poem about it, one day I might share.� Today is not that day.� To fully appreciate the very things that make Chicago the place that it is you have to live here for a decade, move somewhere else (in my case Atlanta), hate yourself for moving, and move back.� Most of you don't wanna go through the steps, so my cursory look at the city we love to hate will have to suffice.� And now (horns blaring in the background), the Chicago Slide Show.

My School (see webpage)-Some people would consider my school a landmark, a crowning jewel on the golden thingie that sits atop Chicago's self-deprecating head.� I, on the other hand, would not.� For one, I go to the University of Chicago and it has been the cause of much misery, not to mention it is the most boring place on this side of creation.� In addition, the school was founded by WASPs who probably had a couple of my kind serving their families at the old castle (as in "a man's home is his castle"--note my bitterness) and could not have cared one bit about my opinion concerning their "fine institution."� To this day, the work of those great men have been continued in roping the university's students and institutions off from the rest of the community (which is predominately black) and in tirelessly trying to rid the neighborhood of Hyde Park from the scurge of black life.� To its credit, and to say something positive before I leave the subject, the dining halls serve pretty good food.

Harold's/Leon's-Okay so I'm sure that if you know anyone from Chicago or anyone who has lived here for a while, you've heard of Harold's.� Two words, two syllables:� Mild Sauce.� That's it.� Harold's is known for its sauce which can be described to those of you who have never had it as a cross somewhere between barbecue sauce and ketchup with a slightly sweet taste.� You can get a variety of things at Harold's with the most popular of those being chicken wings, pizza puffs, hot links, gizzards, fries (yes fries, just ask for a bag with mild sauce), pizza (depending on the location), and fish.� Needless to say, most people ask for whatever the hell they want with mild sauce, that's the point.� You can fry chicken at home, you can't make mild sauce (though my mother and my late uncle willie had some mean barbecue sauces).� Leon's is pretty much the same thing, but more of an underground spot.� You have to live on the south side (uhhh-ohhh!!) to be familiar with this one since there are only three locations.� One location, on 83rd and Cottage Grove, is attached to a Dat Donut (waaay better than Krispy Kreme, trust me) and they're open all the time.� I can't tell you the number of times my friends and I have travelled long distances to get a three wing and a dozen of donuts at three or four in the morning just to do it.� Leon's traditionally has bigger wings and gives you more sauce so you don't have to ask for extra sauce (like you may have to at Harolds's).� Obviously my vote goes to Leon's, but a good Harold's is also good eating.� For the love of god never ever ever go to the Harold's in Hyde Park, it's the worst in the city. After leaving Chicago to live in Atlanta--thinking I was hot shit--I discovered that other places simply don't have stuff like this (I've been elsewhere, I'm not just basing my assertion on the ATL alone) and I started to miss it.� When friends come home from school, where do they wanna go?� Harold's or Leon's.� Giordano's is another pick, but that's another story.�

Clubs-Ummm....I don't go out much, so I have no place telling you where to go.� I have been to The Funky Buddha, The Mad Bar, The Double Door, The Red Dog, and The Big Wig, but that's about it.� If you ever get the chance, go to The Funky Buddha to see Pevin Everett (local talent with a bomb-ass show). Another thing, there's a band called D-Settlement that claims Chicago as its home. They can be seen at the Hot House; if you're ever here, go see 'em, good show.