Life, it's a long dreary existance,
in which one thing upsets another;
From a pesky sister who's bothersome with annoyance,
to a "My daughters a little princess" mother.
The anger is thick, and it's swallowing me whole,
there's nothing left to live for, I've lost the fight;
My few and only feelings have been stomped on and stole,
I try to escape, and I try harded, real hard, with all my might;
But I'm trapped, in this hope sucking black hole.
I've lost my feelings; Happiness, joy, and love,
I've also forgotten what pain is like, forgotten the sorrow, the agony;
The worlds ripped me apart, piece by piece, then it decided to shove,
It's knocked me down the stairs, tumbling and tossing, then wrapping a bag around me;
Hell, I guess you can say I'm no longer me.
I no longer give a damn, It's the easiest way to block things out,
the scars are too deep, I've tried to let them heal but it's too late;
My minds so pissed off at me that even it is taking it's turn to shout;
The world's a trippy place, full of darkness and hate.
Would other peoples lives really change if I was to drop out of them?
Would I soon be forgotten and replaced with another loser to make fun of?
Why are my feelings like a weed and it's ugly, twisted stem?
Only to be given hope and growth, then chopped right down to the middle real jagged and rough?
I hear of a lightness that fills our lives, but I look around and see gray,
I get thinking of how I'm such an outcast, a loser, a nerd;
I try to think positive, but it's hard not knowing what other people say,
supposably your friends, but talking behind your back from what you've heard.
Why do I waste my time trying to be happy here?
There's nothing left for me, I've been abandoned by all, even my family;
The only light in the tunnel I see is a six-pack of beer,
but that's not doing more than tearing up the rest of me.
What is there to look foward to? To live for? A reason to live?
There's nothing here but anger & hatred and darkness & grit;
Nothing good, no hope, no future. Any good reasons to give?
That could save me from this dark, bottomless pit???
"Grief Is Homework"
Grief, It's strong and overwhelming,
It's an emotion that is always around;
Ready to strike with it's scorpian like sting,
to land it's painful blow and knock you to the ground.
Grief will add up fast, too fast, and it won't disappear,
and when it hits it hits hard, real hard, tearing you up so bad,
that you'll lose that manly machoness and fall to your knees it tears;
It tears you up with such force that when you finally die you'll be glad.
It's so string it will overshadow your love,
and all the other good emotions that God chose to make;
Grief will stack them all up into a huge pile and shove,
leaving nothing behind but the cold blood of misery in it's wake.
Homework's the same, there is always some there,
lot's of it, sitting there and piling up your desk while it's waiting for you;
You start to panic, your sweat starts to bead, you pull out your hair,
your head hurts, and you think so hard your brain mushes into a stew.
It also covers up the rest of your life,
taking anything and everything else fun you can do,
and ripping it out of your planner with that rusted jagged knife;
So homework covers up your life, then rips you apart too.
Both of them don't hit hard right away,
but they build up slow, and multiply with great success;
Grief is homework, It surrounds you and swallows you whole; It's here to stay,
and ultimately it will fill you with the same dark emptiness.
-
The Emptiness, the loneliness, the darkness,
living only to find a way to stop living, to finally sleep;
Wanting nothing more the to get out of this mess,
but his blood was taken from him and now his souls the devils to keep.
The Emptiness, the loneliness, the darkness,
no real friends, just other lifeless bodies to wait with;
Their lives are just as dull and gray, covered by the same dim fogginess,
not only forgotten, but not believed in to start with, considered a myth.
The Emptiness, the loneliness, the darkness,
always moving, everythings new, nothings old, nothing to remember, nothing to comfort;
Can't make friends, or hold a job, to make yourself oblivious,
no precious memories to hold onto, no love, no joy, or no happiness; Just hurt.
The Emptiness, the loneliness, the darkness,
living in the dark, never seeing the orange glow of the rising sun;
To leave this hell is impossible, but so is living like this with all this stress,
to see ordinary people walking by, holding the hands of thier son.
The Emptiness, the loneliness, the darkness,
to be ran by evil, to crave the bitter taste of blood;
To finally end this life after death is like seeing satan in a pink, lacy, dress;
It's too late, now fate is sealed; You'll have to deal with this crud.
The Emptiness, the loneliness, the darkness,
that's all there is, besides more gray thoughts;
Thoughts of your wife, your kids, your family that you miss,
that died long before now, lying in their graves, starting to rot.
The Emptiness, the loneliness, the darkness,
with bodies that have no heartbeat, or breate no air, that are in constant decaence;
To have no life, to be twisted, even tormented, but mostly, to have the feeling of impassiveness,
The Emptiness, the loneliness, the darkness...
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