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I have the most useless thoughts and non-sensical memory in the history of the Homo sapien race, and I'm going with that.

So the other week I read somewhere online that asked the rhetorical question: How do blind people determine their bum is clean after taking a dump?

Now, everyone is supposed to read that, get it, laugh, and move on with their lives. I on the otherhand, actually took time to think about it.

"Well," I began to surmise. "I'd wipe and wipe until my butt's chafe. Then, if by then it still isn't clean, forget it, it already hurts."

What other stuff keeps me up at night?

Summer of Grade 4 to Grade 5. The Woolco washroom, located on the second floor, by the corner, situated at Harwood Plaza in Ajax -- second of three stalls. I can even see the walls and dim lighting.

The poem scralled therein (Yes, it's rather crass, so don't read me Mommy.)

Tarzan swings, Tarzan falls,
Jane grabs him by the balls.
Now you know why Tarzan calls....
Aw, aww, all, awwww, all!

....and you wonder why I never excelled in school. posted by losir at 2:58 PM