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Things to Look for in a Girlfriend
(In case you don't know what you want in life.)

Guys, I know it's sometimes hard to know what you should look for in a girl. Afterall, we're pretty much suckers for any girl that'll smile at us. Still, there should be some sort of standard. So I've compiled several pointers and situations you should mentally check off when dating a girl. If she meets even half of the list below, then she could be a keeper; but not always of course. If nothing else, you'll know that trusting her with your pet gold fish is pretty safe.

� after seeing your one stupid human trick zillion of times - still laughs along like it was the first.
� holds your head above the toilet bowl, after a long night of hard drinking.
� asks, "Do I look fat in this?" no more than once a day.
� willing to share you with your bike.
� decides that working out wouldn't be a waste of time.
� instead of the lobster tail, orders the fish - because it's cheaper, and almost just as good.
� endures hot-waxing, because she knows that lip hair is nasty.
� compares you to Nick from 98 Degrees; and you win.
� knows exactly where your back itches, as soon as you ask for a scratch.
� truely grateful that you bought her another pair of shoes.
� doesn't cry at every chance, or even every other chance.
� knows you love her, without having to say it.
� believes that anchovies on pizza doesn't totally suck.
� washing dishes is a man's job, but only if she cooked.
� knows when to sit and smile in the midst of your friends; then give you the business in the car.
� thinks that flatulent is an artfrom, especially from somone as talented as you.
� kisses you even with the mother-of-all sandpaper stubbles.
� the car bathes before you.
� map directions are for sissies.
� allows you to sing at karaoke even if you make every ballad sound like frogs ribbit-ing.
� the Sports section gets read before daily news.
� plucking her eyebrows doesn't hurt as much as they say in the magazines.
� thinks your friends are almost as cool as hers, (even your female friends.)
� sees a cute kid, and straight-faced, deadpans "S/he's not that cute."

....and finally: helps you check out girls at the mall. "Did you see the size of her bazonkas??"

posted by losir at 4:37 AM