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Man, what is going on with Toronto. Something like 5 shootings in a week. Hey, this is Toronto, Hogtown, you know, just like New York City, but no trash and everone is friend? What the heck is going on here?

The problem with guns is that it's the ultimate equalizer. Back in the day of schoolyard scraps, two kids with a grudge would fight it out after class. Normally, it was nothing more harmful than the two kids pushing each other, until they rolled around the grass, muddied and tired. It was a bad fight if one of the kids took off his shoe and threw it at the other. Shoot, a lot of the times the two kids fighting even became friends afterwards.

Nowadays, you can't look at anyone the wrong way, in fear of getting shot in the back. Guns are the ultimate "coward" weapon. You don't need to put a hand on your victim to do damage. And guns give the agressor a sense of security and manhood no knife or baseball bat can. Everyone knows a gunshot is final. You shoot someone, they might not die, but their ability to fight back is instantly stopped. If the victim survives, s/he feel humiliated, and decides to get one, in case they're ever in the same situation. Everyone is trying to one-up the next person.

I say everyone carries a cup of round, dime sized plastic chips. If at anytime you feel like your honoured has been stepped on, or anything stupid like that. Break out the cup and chips, and play a game of Tiddlywinks. Yes, that would work. Just think, 5 year olds would be feared and revered by the badest gangsters!

...so a guy in a ski mask runs into the bank and yells "Give me all your money, or I'll put a tiddlywink in your cup!"



posted by losir at 6:40 PM