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Oh snap, I do have something to write about.

You know what they say about female premonition? Well, do they say anything about guys?

You know, I take the same route to work everyday. I don't deviate, because I like normalcy. I like comfort zones, all that. I also like to know where the cops are, so I take the same route, and will NOT speed at the danger areas.

But I was thinking yesterday (yes, I can do that on occasion), while riding my bike through a a certain cop laiden stretch, that I've never, I mean, ever heard of cops using bus shelters as a cover to a radar trap. I kept thinking, "Wow, what a bastid way to catch us."

And then it happened today. There was a copper, his lidar just in the doorway of a bus shelter, half hidden inside. Buddy had just stopped a guy and was writing up a ticket (white Pontiac Sunfire, last generation model). Ha!

But for once, it wasn't me. I didn't get burned. *PHEW!*

My luck for the year just ran out.

I just started two seperate paragraphs with "And" and "But". I'm going to grammar hell.

....Does stuff like this happen to regular folks? posted by losir at 1:43 AM

Dudes, I'm blankety blank tired. I just got home from work, and boy, am I beat. Working from 9:30am to 1:30am does that to a brother.

So instead of thinking of something to type, I'll post this, because I never got a chance to post it before:

From my trip back home on the airplane....

==
As I type, I'm seriously having the worst traveling experience to date.

A group of 50 year old delinquents are horsing around, slapping each other, wrestling, yelling, laughing, and basically being total jackwads. It's actually pretty annoying if you ask me. Quite frankly, losir is not amused.

Especially when they sit right next to me. Talk about oncoming air rage. I've seen bull walrusses (walri?) battling for the herd more civilized than these guys.

What am I saying? I'm sure if I ever live to be 50, I'll be horsing around just like this too. Heck, I'm still not above making fart jokes at my age.

....Another post knocked out. posted by losir at 1:28 AM

I finally got to wash my baby today, and boy, was she dirty.

I feel really bad that it's taken me this long to get out the hose, but I've seriously been way too busy to even think about washing, let alone waxing her. I still haven't gotten around to doing that yet.

And you know what? She's showing her age. She's not as pretty as she once was. There are now scratches in there that wasn't before. Her paint is starting to fade; compared to the new bikes now, she could even be consider portly.

But I love her, as much as I did when I first picked her up. Even more so maybe now because we have such an amazing working relationship. I've been with her for five wonderful years, she anticipate all my moves, and I know all her tricks. Wow, five years - is the ol' gal really that old?

No matter. She is still grand to me, and I respect and cherish her like she needs to. I promised her the world, and I'll begin fulfilling that promise by giving her new spark plugs, oil change, and re-oiled forks. Wax jobs are in order too, don't you fret.

I still love my bike. *click*

....yes, I am still talking about my bike.

posted by losir at 9:21 PM

I'm going to open up a restaurant that serves only soup, chicken legs and good beer. I even have a name for it too....

....Souper Thighs Mead. posted by losir at 2:47 AM

Well....

....Goodbye house.

posted by losir at 2:28 AM

My friends are scared to sit in my car. I know this because each time we go out for lunch or whatever, they insist on driving. When I do drive, they have their seatbelts on, even in the backseat.

I find that offensive. I don't feel that I drive particularily poor. Yes, I tend to speed. Yes, I take corners a little too aggressively considering I've got 4 other passengers in the vehicle. Yes, I gurgle and make "Get out of the way" grunts complete with hand jestures. (Not the middle finger, Mom. Relax.)

I find it utterly bewildering that it's coming from the same people who brag about their accidental power slides around right-handers on the bikes or how they hit 200kph once the lane cleared.

Okay, they're not really hooligans, but they're certainly no angels. I've sat in their cars as well, and I don't think they are driving instructor calibre either.

I know it's the law and all, but how many of us actually wear seatbelts in the backseat because it was the right thing to do? I don't know anyone quite frankly; maybe I just run with a pack of animals.

....I don't even tailgate nobody. posted by losir at 1:07 AM

Hi, my name is losir, and I'm pitiful.

So did you hear about this promotion, "Bring me your Dim Bra?".

Let me explain.

Dim, apparently a company that make bras, had a promotion on Saturday. Marketing type folks walked around at a specific location from the hours of 12 to 4pm, and when you bring a Dim bra to them with receipt, they give you an iPod Shuffle. 600 prizes to be given out, 120 per location.

Great. I was sceptical because I got the email on April Fool's day. I grabbed the url and did a whois DNS lookup. I then googled the marketing company's name and found a legit telephone number. Calling up the office, the receptionist assured me it was for real, and even told me where to buy a Dim bra.

Coercing Ms. Toxin to go, I told her what was going down. She basically gets a free bra (I didn't choose it, she picked the cheapest possible), and I get a free iPod Shuffle.

Saturday was a miserable day. Freezing rain, wet snow, cold, and windy. Not good combinations. By the time we got to Yonge/Bloor with bra in hand, it was 11:55am. Good timing.

The line was already big, and people were anxious to get their Shuffle. Long story short, after waiting 2 and a half hour in absolute crap weather (Ms. Toxin waited inside most of the time), I missed getting one, by about 5 people.

I should have known. You don't call me losir for nothing.

You know what the truely scary thing was? I called it. I told Toxic Girl on the way down, "With my luck, I'd be like out by 5 peeps."

Oh yeah, to make things really bad, remember how I said it was super windy? Well chunks of ice were blowing off high rise rooftops, and yours truly got smacked in the head, TWICE!
....At least I have a story to tell. posted by losir at 12:51 AM