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Man, this sucks.

Just when you think you finally have the answer to what's the meaning of life, they go and change the question. What's with that?? In the philosophical meandering of Dr. Evil from Austin Powers: "Throw me a frickin' bone here."

The world revolves around me doesn't it? When they ask "Who da bomb?", I always thought it was me! But now, I have this nagging suspicion that only am I not da bomb, but in fact I'm really just the target that da bomb is dropped on. That's right, that itchy feeling on my back is the drying paint of red and white circles, with a BIG "X" marked in the middle. In a sentence, if you look for S.O.L. (Stink Outta Luck) in the dictionary, you see my smiling face right next to it. Rats!

I say this because they're taking away the only one thing I truely enjoy. Which totally sucks. So I guess it's finally time for me to move on and try something new. Skydiving without a working parachute sounds like fun, donchathink?

....I feel like an old oxen put to pasture, it's only usefulness is to keep the grass short. Moo. posted by losir at 12:01 PM

I miss my childhood. I really do.

Things were so much simpler then. You knew your place in the world. If you messed up, your parents put you back in line. End of story.

Nowadays, I'm supposed to be an adult. I have to be responsible and accountable for my actions and speech. If I screw up, I can't depend on anyone to bail me out except me. Which sucks, because well, I'm not the most dependable guy in the world, am I? (Don't answer that.)

I miss days when I would wake up, sun shining on my face, knowing full well I didn't have to rush in the morning because it was the summer holidays, and I could be as lazy as I want. I would lie in bed, relishing my freedom and excited at what lied ahead that day. Maybe it was a 4 hour marathon of TV, starting with The Price is Right and finishing with The Brady Bunch, with the Flintstone thrown in somewhere in the middle. Or it could be just hanging out with my buddies on our bikes, cycling to a new part of town we haven't been to. It could be skipping rocks by the lake, climbing trees in the park, or a pick-up game of hide and go seek. Whatever it was, it didn't matter, because times were simple and you knew your place in life.

Think way back, to a point where going out for dinner was special. Your parents would inform you at about 4 or 5 pm that neither Mom nor Dad felt like cooking, so they were taking the whole family to McDoggies or Booger Thing. And if we were good, we could get a Schlappy Meal. Did I mention it even came with a toy?! Oh cool.

Now that I'm grown up, I dread having to eat at McDogs, mostly out of convenience. I'd die for a home cooked meal. That's right, I'd drop dead, right here and now, for a decent home cooked meal. Stuff my corpse with homemade filling.... Okay, maybe that's being a little stupid. I'd only die for a GREAT homecooked meal, like the ones Mom used to make. Oh man, to this day, my Mother makes the best, the FREAKING BEST cream of mushroom, chicken and spinich lasagna this side of Little Italy. Just typing that made my stomach growl in sorrow. I so miss that dish.

You know what else? My Mom's homebaked apple pie. If you think you know apple pie, I pity your ignorance. You only know sour apples, over-spiced and always too sweet, haphazardly thrown between second grade sawdust you call crust, and then burnt in the oven. I'm telling you, one bite of my Mom's apple pie, and you'd swear off all other religion, just to have another slice. It was that good. By the way, did I mention that she even made the crust from scratch. Beat that Betty Crocker!

I also miss my Dad's Chinese cooking. He could make ordinary vegetables and beef into delicacy fit for a king; eating it made you feel like royalty. My Mom can cook non-Chinese food like no one's business, but when it comes to authentic Chinese cusine, fergetaboutit pal. He even makes "Cha Sill Bow" (BBQ Pork buns) from scratch. So there!

I want my childhood back. I'd trade in my GTI and my bike for a brief second of my childhood. Those carefree days of fun are long gone. Now, even one evening spent playing on the computer makes me feel guilty. I could so make that time more worthwhile. I would give it all away to be 12 again. Well, minus the puberty bit. Peach fuzz was kinda embarassing.

Where is my place in life now? I don't know, I really don't. I hope I fit into yours, somewhere....

...."Where have all the flowers gone, long time passing...." <- 10 yrs old, heard while helping my Dad paint the new house in Ajax.
posted by losir at 2:44 PM

When I got my citizenship, the Judge who was to swear us in raised an interesting fact: For the first time in Canada's history, there are more "immigrants" than there are native Canadians. (Whoever they are) She also said that some famous dude in the States said that Canada is the greatest country in the world because of our acceptance in such diverse ethnicity.

Right. So I'm stopped at my local McDogs for a quick bite of dinner, when I see two kids in a corner, no more than 15-16. One was a black kid, dressed very modern urban. Big bright jacket, baggy pants, and a tuque limply perched on his head. Actually, the tuque reminded me of an alien brain sucker, dead because there was no brain to suck. That's what it looked like on the the kid.

He even had the cocky bouncy swagger when he walked around the restaurant. I'm saying all this just so you can get an idea of what type of image this young gentleman portrayed. The second kid, was white and dressed preppy. Leather jacket, slacks, black shoes. Looked Jewish too, but I ain't sure. That's what I thought. Sue me.

Anyhow, you wouldn't think these two kids were buddies, but as the preppy kid left McDogs, him and the black kid gave the "hot potato" handshake. You know, first person makes a fist, holds it up high, and hammers the second's outstretched but lowered fist. Then the position switches, and finally, both punch each others' fist and they go on their seperate way. (Usually, leaving with a "Yo.")

I smile, chiding myself for stereotyping the two guys. I mean, isn't that multi-culturalism at work folks? Isn't that what makes Canada great??

Two black gentlemen, mid 30s, early 40s were ordering food. The counter girl was of Asian descent. While the men spoke with heavy accents, I'm guessing Jamaican, made their particular order known, (and it wasn't the normal burger, opting for a McChicken with no mayo but tomatos, Fillet-O-Fish no cheese but lettice.) the Asian girl was distracted with a previous customer who hadn't picked up his/her takeout food yet.

When the food was finally served, the burgers weren't made correctly, and it had to be repackaged. As the men left, they start making Oriental gutteral sounds, and one guy sucks his teeth and goes "Japanese."

I laughed. Stereotype re-affirmed. Multi-culturalism does NOT work, because there are too many stupid and ignorant people in this world. Forget respect, how about grudging tolerance?? I'd settle for that.

....Hopefully, the next generation of kids will fair better. I'm not holding my breath tho. posted by losir at 12:03 AM

How ghetto is this? The Company's gym change room is in total chaos. Out of the 10-12 lockers in there, only 2 have actual keys with their locks. What is going on here? The worst part is looking for a locker to use, and opening one up w/ people's clothes already in there. It feels like such an invasion of privacy. Dang!

Also there's water everywhere because there's a leak in the shower somewhere. There is drainage on the floor for this kind of thing, but the floors don't slope towards the drain, so it's virtually useless. Of course, as Murphy's Law is in full effect, the pool of water is strategically stagnant at the entrance to the lockers. So at each ingress/egress, I have to leap over it like an antelop, hoping that I won't touch down in the pool of nastiness. So far, I'm betting a thoursand, knock on wood.

Too bad there's nothing I can really do. No amount of buggin' will get the powers that be to fix it. Afterall, the Company should be relocating sometime this year, or at worst, the start of the next. Joy.

In the meantime, I have to workout in subpar conditions. I'd join a real gym, but I'm worry I won't always have time, and waste my membership. That would suck.

....I just noticed something totally unrelated: the more popular a rapper you are, the better looking chicks you have in your video.



posted by losir at 7:33 PM

I don't have too much to write today, again.

I haven't had anything to piss me off or worry me. None of the conversations I've had lately with my friends have sparked me into a rant. Everything is just too perfect. Okay, the weather is still crummy, but that's old news.

Like the ancient Chinese curse would say: "May you live in interesting times." I guess I'm blessed right now.

....enjoy it while you can, I think the Round Eyes call this the calm before the storm.

posted by losir at 1:55 PM

You know, sometimes I can be quite the clever little bugger.

For ALL your viewing pleasures. Here's my version of "emotion of the day"

I call it:
ANIMOTIONS

If you want to view all my potential moods, click here
or you can click on the actual animotion picture on the left to see all future updates.

....Dang, I crack myself up. posted by losir at 4:04 PM

I've got a nice selection of pictures now for my emotes. Rock.

Thanks to imode idea, which both madcanadian and Shy uses.. I know I can't come up with anything original. I'm just a biter. :)

But hey, it looks pretty good IMO.

So nyah nyah. posted by losir at 11:32 AM

Hi all.

As you can see on your left, I will be posting my emotions. Hopefully, you can have a chuckle at the cute animal pictures, as well as know how I'm feeling that day. I'm not always going to be a macho-man type guy, but at the same time, I'm not a total wuss.

The vocabulary of my emotions will grow as I find more pictures. If you have some really good looking cute animals, then please send them my way.

[email protected]

Thanks.

Have fun. I think it turned out really good BTW. :) posted by losir at 8:00 PM

Blogger is again having slight updating problems... so that's why my page looks barren for the last 3 days.

I want to update/redo my links page, as it is too cumbersome for dialup users.

More later today I hope. posted by losir at 2:29 PM

You know the old adage: "Takes one to know one."
How about: "Two birds of a feather, flock together."

You know right? If not, what they're saying is that people of the same mind tend to hang together, making a clique of sorts. For example, the jocks hang with other jocks, the cheerleaders play with only the "pretty" crowd, and the nerds, well, they build robots together in their spare time, with Lego and paperclips.

I sure hope this is a truism, because looking back, all my life I've hung out with smart folks. Other than grade 9, my scholastic years were all with people who's IQ was higher than I could ever hope to count. Even in university, where I was in a state of perpetual anti-socialistic behaviour, the 2 or 3 good friends I have are really bright. Look, Comrade is now working at Microsoft (booo!!!), Drew is developing software for a big bank, and Niran, well I don't know what happened to him, but last I heard, he was making games for the PC. Doesn't sound so bad, does it?

Look at my buddies outside of work, Fido Dido, Scotland, madcanadian. All very smart kids. (If you're reading this, don't flatter yourselves, I've got photographic proof that you're all idiots! *smirk*). Even people I've met at work, and now call friends: massivest, xtreme-pwr-play, yoyo, hydrabenzine, mute. Bright as a penny, smart as a button. Cream of the crop, and all that.

Which makes me wonder, why the heck are they allowing me to hang around them? Sheesh, I feel like such an outcast sometimes. Let's face some facts, if my brain was an orange, and you wanted to squeeze me for juice, it's not going to be enough for your Screwdriver. The most you'll get out of me is only enough to flavour Halls' cough drops. And I ain't talking about the whole freakin' roll, just one sad little candy tablet.

I've been attempting study on the weekends at the library. Either I'm reading the material in French, or I'm extremely dyslexic, because short of these two excuses, I'm totally lost.

Okay, I mean when I read a sentence, I understand every word, but when I flip a page and read the next line, it's as good as Greek to me. For some unfathomable reason, I've become the duh kid. I think I know what I'm reading, but when I go and try to apply my new found knowledge into a psuedo real world problem, I make the Three Stooges look like the Three Wise Men.

This is embarassing, and making me a little scared. If I can't even do these seemingly simple exercises, how am I suppose to learn at my new job? The last thing I want to do is disappoint anyone, least of all me. Maybe I'm setting goals for myself that's above my reach, like the little kid who's an inch too short of the cookie jar. But I want to excel darnit, and right now, my Dual OverHead Cam 16 valve twin-turbo fuel injected brain is running on crappy-ass 56 octane unleaded gas from Petro-Can.

They say that as we grow old, our ability to learn is deminished. If I get any more dumb, they're gonna have to put a sticker on my forehead: Warning, the Surgeon General has deemed this to be an unsafe area for learning. Keep all books and other flamables away from this area.

...."Welcome to McDoggies, would you like fries to go with that shake?" <--- phew, I still have ONE marketable skill.






posted by losir at 1:52 AM