~ Noticed ~

Noticed
8.23.04

I’ve been listening to you for the past four hours
A number pulled out of the randomness in my head
It hurts, the insecurity, the insincerity
And the numb smiles- they’ll bleed after a little longer

But you won’t notice
You are immune
You’ll just fly on, and it’s all too soon
I’ll lay awake for hours
Replaying your image in my head
But you won’t notice
As I’m all but dead...

The graveyard is empty now
No one is here, to say this or to say that
To remember the hurt, because that would hurt too much
But in the numbness, I can’t turn back

Can’t open my eyes, can’t sit and lie
With their flowers and their cards
They’ll leave, eventually
Leave to memories-
To open eyes, and lies
And everything this world has to pretend with.

But you won’t notice
You are immune
You’ll just soar on, and it’ll be too soon
I’ll lay awake beneath the scratched surface
Replaying your emptiness in my head
But you won’t notice
As I slowly laugh to death...

I laugh because I won’t cry
I laugh because the tears are dark
I laugh because I always lie
I laugh because I should have realized
You never noticed me from the start.

<--- fall into my patterened tears... [return]
<---<--- catch me as i fall? [CS]