Author: Anne
Email: [email protected]
Summary: What would the world have been like if Liz had died in the shooting? After an accident, Liz finds herself experiencing that world.
Background: Immediately after the Balance. No spoilers or anything.
Author: This is my first fanfic, and I've been toying with this story idea for a while now. Please give me feedback!
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: They're not mine. The characters of Roswell belong to Melinda Metz, the WB, Jason Katims, and all the wonderful people who we all love for starting this wonderful story. I'm just borrowing them!
Timelines (Part One)
"How is it possible that I could be that I could be the happiest I've ever been, you know, and now the saddest all at one time?"
"I think that's what being in love is."
"I think so too."
"So we'll just take a step back. For a while."
"Yeah, well. You know if that's what you want."
"It's what I need Liz, because I'm just as scared as you
are."
"No, wait Max!" Liz kisses him. Max just stands there
like a stone, refusing to allow himself to kiss her back."
"I just wanted to remember."
"Goodbye, Liz."
"Bye, Max."
Liz had never felt so cold in all her life, as she stood there on
the rooftop hugging herself tightly. The tears ran freely down
her face as she tried to comprehend what has just happened to
her. She stared up at the stars, her eyes catching the
constellation, the one she now knew lead to his home. Suddenly
the universe seemed a lot bigger, and a lot lonelier.
Liz turned and looked at her diary, where she kept all her most
personal thoughts and feelings. Just a minute before Liz had been
sitting there thinking about Max, and how much she loved him, and
how she'd do anything for him. When he came, Liz was so happy to
see him, until she realized
why he was there. Just the other day he'd said that it would be
worth it no matter what they went through, 'cause they'd be
together, and then he ran at the first sign of trouble.
Suddenly Liz was angry. Angry with Max for being so afraid. Angry
with herself for giving him a reason to run. She needed to vent
it all out.
She turned to stalk over to her diary, but as she reached the chair, her foot slipped on the wax that had dripped down off of one of the candles she constantly burned up there. All Liz could see in her mind was Max's face before the blackness that came when her head cracked against the wall.
Liz slowly opened her eyes and looked at her bedroom ceiling.
There was a moment of confusion. The last thing she remembered
was Max and her on the roof. At that memory the pain of what he
had said burst up inside her.
Then she remembered him leaving, and her standing alone up there,
and that was it. Then there was nothing. She had no idea how she
ended up sleeping in her bed. Oh well. It wasn't important. What
was important now was getting to school and dealing with Max. Liz
wanted to cry at the
thought of him, but she couldn't let herself. Today she needed to
be strong. No emotions. She had to suppress them while she was at
school, otherwise she would totally break down when she saw him.
Liz quickly showered and dressed, and ran down the stairway into
the alley. She didn't want to have to deal with her parents this
morning. She looked at her watch. Maria should be pulling up
front any moment. Liz waited..and waited. This was weird. Maria
was usually here by now. What the hell was going on? Finally
after another 5 minutes, Liz gave up and turned down the street
to walk to school.
Max drove through the streets of Roswell only half paying attention to the heated discussion that Isabel and Michael were having beside him. It was going to be tough to get through today. It was the six month anniversary of the Crashdown shooting. The day that Liz Parker had died.
He felt a pain inside him just at the thought of it. He was going to go to the cemetery again today. More flowers. As if flowers could bring her back to him. Max hadn't told Isabel or Michael why it bothered him so much. They would be so mad at him if he told them that his biggest wish was to have been in the café that day, so that he could have saved her, brought her back to them.
He had daydreamed about what it would have been like, to
connect with her, heal her, and then tell her the truth about
him. She had been so beautiful and caring. She probably would
have accepted the truth about him with open arms. Max snorted.
Yeah, that's it. Next thing you'll know he'll be daydreaming
about how she would have fallen in love with him after finding
out the truth. Yeah right. No one would fall in love with an
alien.
He pulled the car around a corner, and as they passed the
Crashdown Café, Max pulled his eyes off the road and stared at
the restaurant. He did it every time he drove passed there. He
didn't even mean to, it just always happened. He always imagined
he could see Liz walk out the doors of
the café again. Suddenly Max blinked.
Wait a sec, this time he didn't imagine it. He could have
sworn that as he drove past, he saw Liz walking out of the alley
next to her home. It's impossible though. She's dead. Max slammed
on the brakes.
"What the hell are you doing, Max?!" Michael shouted
out.
"Um, I need to go do something. You guys go ahead to school.
I'll catch you later." Max jumped out of the jeep and ran
back towards Liz's.
As Michael and Isabel watched him go, only one thought was
running through their heads. What was that about?
Michael jumped up into the driver seat, and they sped off.
Liz sighed as she saw Max's jeep drive by. Of course he was
the first person she'd see this morning. It took all the strength
in her not to cry, as he completely ignored her presence. About
halfway down the next block though, she saw the jeep screech to a
halt.
No! I can't deal with him right now! Liz thought to
herself. Looks like he's not giving me much of a choice
though.
Max had jumped out of the jeep and was walking directly
towards her. He had a really weird look on his face.
"What do you want, Max?"
"Liz? Is that really you? What are you doing here?"
"Walking to school? What does it look like I'm doing? Taking
a step back doesn't mean I'm going to disappear off the planet or
something."
"What are you talking about?"
Liz stared at Max. Why was he doing this to her? "Max. Why
are you pretending like nothing happened last night? God, as if
shattering my heart into a million pieces wasn't enough, now
you're just going to play dumb? This isn't like you. I never
thought that you would sink so low. I mean, it's bad enough that
you ran at the first sign of trouble, but now you're just going
to pretend like nothing happened between us?"
Max stared at Liz. "Happened between us? In my dreams maybe,
but I have no idea what you're talking about, Liz. I just want to
know how it's possible that you're standing here. But I'm getting
the impression that you have no idea what I'm talking about to
the same extent that I don't know what you're talking about. I'll
show you what I mean. Trust me."
"How can I trust you Max? I trusted you with my heart, and
you shattered it."
"Please, Liz?" Max was confused. Shattered her heart?
What was she talking about?
He held out his hand to her, and she took it. At his touch there
were sparks between them, but they both tried to ignore it, as he
led her off.
"So we're going to cut school again. Let's be careful this
time, okay? I don't want you ending up in another hospital bed,"
Liz told him.
Max just ignored her, and he led her towards the Roswell
Cemetery.
"What are we doing here, Max?"
"I want you to see a grave. It's probably going to be really
upsetting for you, so I'm sorry before hand, but I think it's the
only way for you to understand…" Max's voice trailed
off. "Here we are."
Liz looked down at the gravestone. It read "Elizabeth
Parker. Died September 18th, 1999."
Liz gasped. "What? Are you trying to tell me that I'm dead?
That's the day of the shooting. What's going on here?" Liz
slumped to her knees and started crying.
Max watched her. All he wanted to do was gather her up in his
arms and hold her until she was all better, but he didn't have
the right. He was still confused though. How was it possible that
she could be here?
"Liz. I'm sorry. I know this must be really hard for
you." Max reached out and took her hand. He just couldn't
resist touching her again. Liz looked up, her tear stained eyes
meeting his. Suddenly she was in his arms. Neither of them was
sure which one reached for the other first, but they sat
there holding one another.
It felt so right, him holding her like this, but it made Liz cry
even harder. She loved the feel of his arms holding her tightly
against him, but it confused her. Just last night he had broken
her heart, and now all of this. Liz couldn't deal with it
anymore. She pushed herself away from him, and they just stared
at each other.
"I can't do this. Not now," Liz told him. "I need
to go." She turned and ran off.
Max just stood there and watched her go. He tried to comprehend everything that had just happened, but he just couldn't figure it out. He turned and walked home. He couldn't go to school. He just couldn't deal with it today.