A/N: Yup! The sequel
to 'With You'....'Pushing Me Away!' As if anyone cares....but hey......Yes,
'Forgotten' IS in the works.....you WILL get to see if Trent accepts or
declines......R/R plz (jumps out window and lands in a garbage can)
Pushing Me Away
~ I've lied to you
The same way that I always do
This is the last smile
That I'll fake for the sake of being with
you
Trent Reznor opened
his eyes from his sleep. His constant dreams of Marilyn Manson kept him awake.
" I must be
insane.....I can't be in love with Brian!!" Trent thought. But he
was....He couldn't deny it.
" He doesn't
need me....It would ruin everything.." He said. " I'm the only one
who would ruin his life. He probably hates me for everything I've done."
~ Everything falls
apart
Even the people who never frown eventually
break down
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie
Everything has to end, you'll soon find
We're out of time left to watch it all
unwind
The sacrifice is never knowing........
Trent thought it was
impossible, but it was true. He really did love Marilyn Manson, he just didn't
want to admit it. He thought about Manson almost every minute of the day, and
it was usually dirty thoughts. (A/N: Ooohh, that doesn't sound right ^_-)
" Dammit! Why do you have to be so cute, Manson!? You've cursed me!"
~ Why I never walked
away
Why I played myself this way
Now I see your testing me pushes me
away.....
He had always had
something for Manson. Even the day they met, Trent knew Manson was special. He
was right. He was special in his music and his friendship. But Trent had always
kept his feelings hidden and disguised them into his music. It was something he
was naturally good at, being able to hide his feelings well. For some reason
though, he felt he shouldn't hide them anymore.
~ I've tried, like
you
To do everyhting you wanted to
This is the last time
I'll take the blame for the sake of being
with you
Trent kept thinking
about if Manson had the same feelings for him as he did. He had noticed Marilyn
acting strangely lately, and following Trent everywhere. Come to think of it,
Manson probably DID feel the same about Trent. Manson had always wanted to meet
Nine Inch Nails, even when he was a journalist. Maybe just to meet Trent. Trent
smirked. He couldn't believe he was actually THINKING like this. It made him
feel out of place, in it's own sense, as if someone was reading his thoughts.
Then again, Trent had always been slightly paranoid.
~ Everything falls
apart
Even the people who never frown eventually
break down
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie
Everything has to end, you'll soon find
We're out of time left to watch it all
unwind
The sacrifice is never knowing........
Trent felt like
crying at that moment. He knew he could never have Manson, even if he felt the
same way. No one would accept it, and he would be seen as an outcast and a
fugitive, or just someone who needed love.
" Damn, I'm
pretty pathetic, being in love with Brian." Trent tried to laugh, but he
couldn't seem to convince himself he didn't need Marilyn. Reznor broke down and
cried. He felt kind of low, a high-profile rock star fantisizing over another,
but Trent couldn't have cared less about his public image. He had never seemed
to care about what others perceived of him, but now the only person whose
opinion he cared about was Marilyn Manson. He cried only because he knew Manson
would hate him forever and never speak to him again. Then what would Trent do?
" I only want
your happiness, knowing I can never be yours to share it." Trent said
before sleep finally claimed him.
~ Why I never walked
away
Why I played myself this way
Now I see your testing me pushes me away
Why I never walked away
Why I played myself this way
Now I see your testing me pushes me
away.....
Liked it? Hated it?
Don't care either way? R/R plz...BTW..I'm changing the name of 'Forgotten' to
'Without Me.' 'Kay? Thankz for reading 'cuz you're all 2 good 2 be 4gotten!