You have explained sexuality and its significance very
well from various prespective.
Our ancient history, traditional value, society and
religion, all have accepted our sexuality as integral
part of our daily life.
I would respectfully differ to your ref. about the
selfishness in sex of Indian males.  Grievances of
women in this regard is global.   Women of every walk
of life has complained about the selfishness of male
when it comes to their (women’s)sexual satisfaction . 
All along the history of mankind man has always
thought of his on (sexual)desires and fulfillment.

To your complain that Islam has influenced our thought
process, I tend to believe on the contrary.  Our
regional traditions and ancient practices have more to
do in suppressing the woman’s sexual needs.  My sister
was never allowed to marry when she became a widow at
the age of 32.  My family is known to be an educated
one.  Thank god she was not pushed into the fire..  ]
I have some very good Muslim friends of mine and
believe me Islam has more answers to woman’s problems
than any other religion.  There value system revolves
around women and family. 

Now the million dollar question:  the dilemma of a
sexually unsatisfied wife.  What are her rights?  I
would like to request to all religious gurus to check
on this.  Does our religion has given any right to a
women who is left unsatisfied by her husband?  Society
after all is the product of practicing masses.  

Finally the issue of Girija Chetathi who was the
victim of her family situation and perhaps a sexually
weak husband compared to Girija’s sexual apatite. 
Muthu has exploited the situation as several other men
has done all along.  Girija’s enraged desires for big
kunna of Muthu mad her commit a very silly act of
doing whatever she did purposely.  
Had Muthu been an educated person that could have made
Girija’s life a little bit easier.  Because in my
opinion education plays a vital role in terms of how a
person behaves.  Muthy could be more respectful to
Girija then.

No matter however much we keep this subject alive, at
the end of the day it is the woman who carries the
burden.

P
  

--- chander1000 <muchalla@yahoo.co.in> wrotte:

> Desperate Woman  
> 
> Hello, my dear sexy friends. How are you all. I hope
> you all enjoyed 
> my  story. I know you will because I received so
> many mails from all 
> of you. Slowly, one by one my fellow Indian sisters
> are coming out 
> of the closet and sharing their problems and views
> with me. I thank 
> all of them. I have come to know many more problems
> which Indian 
> women suffer only and only in the matter of sex.
> Most basic problem 
> suffered by them is sexual satisfaction - that is
> the lack of it. 
> Indian male are so obsessed with their own sexual
> arousal and 
> satisfaction that they seldom care about whether
> their spouse has 
> enjoyed the sexual act or not. They are not to blame
> for that. Our 
> upbringing and our sick social traditions have
> always projected sex 
> as an immoral act. Any man or woman indulging in sex
> for the pure 
> pleasure of it is a social outcast. Unfortunately.
> 
> Our history is however different. Our culture had
> accepted sex as an 
> integral part of daily living. The great sage
> Vatsayayana 
> wrote 'KAMASUTRA' which is an eulogy to the Indian
> advancement in 
> matters of sex. It is and will remain as the most
> complete book ever 
> written on sex. The scientific and social research
> which has gone 
> through in writing the book is ample testimony that
> we Indians had 
> great knowledge of sex. Our temples, our traditions,
> our rituals are 
> symbols of sex. Sex was a divine and spiritual
> endeavor and not a 
> shameful act. This thought process was brought in
> with the Islamic 
> influence. The purdah system and moralities changed
> the outlook 
> towards sex. Sex suddenly became taboo. It was
> enjoyed indoors and 
> was considered to be an immoral act. It was meant
> only to produce 
> children and physical enjoyment especially of women
> was blasphemous. 
> The later British rule further made sex into a taboo
> subject. 
> Britishers converted sex into a sin.
> 
> The Mughals and the Britishers went away but their
> moral and sexual 
> ideologies had taken deep roots in the psyche of our
> society. Indian 
> society which at one point of time considered sex as
> a natural 
> process, now believed it as a sin. If anybody has
> suffered the 
> aftermath of this ideology then it has been the
> Indian Woman. Men 
> have analyzed the sexual code to suit their selfish
> reasons. But 
> women have been told to suppress their sexual needs.
> I wish to 
> categorically state here that I in no way wish to
> antagonise the 
> Indian males. But if you all honestly study the
> subject you will 
> realise that what I have stated is absolutely true.
> My second 
> intention is to put forth my views and the views of
> my sisters 
> before you all. I want you to rethink and evolve.
> And I guarantee 
> you with your sexual evolution you will benefit as
> much as the 
> female sex. Sexual enjoyment is not the preserve of
> only males, you 
> give us our pleasure and you will see that the
> sexual pleasures are 
> going to be manifold.
> 
> Inspite of the system and the social mores there
> have been many 
> women who have asserted their sexuality. I am one of
> them. I am 
> proud to proclaim it. I am also proud of my husband
> who has co-
> operated me immensely with his progressive ideology.
> I know many 
> more women who have asserted their sexuality. I wish
> to also make 
> another point here. I do not advocate free sex and
> immoral sex. I do 
> not want open sex. I wish to propose sex within
> husband and wife as 
> equal partners. And if any of the two sex is a
> failure, I propose 
> that the other sex should give option to his/her
> spouse to fulfill 
> her sexual needs. This all should be within the
> parameters of home, 
> hearth and society.
> 
> I was introduced to this ideology by my
> sister-in-law - Girija Devi. 
> She is my husband's elder brothers wife. They stay
> in Kerala in a 
> small village at the outskirts of Kottayam. As I had
> narrated to 
> you, my husband had become impotent due to
> consumption of wrong 
> medicine. This happened nearly three years back. At
> that time I had 
> gone to Kerala on my yearly vacation. I had visited
> all my relatives 
> houses one by one. Girija Chetathi (Sisiter-in-law)
> talked to me on 
> telephone and invited me to their house. My husband
> had left me in 
> Kerala and gone to Bombay since he did not have much
> leave. My 
> husbands elder brother came to my in-laws house to
> take me to their 
> house. I reached their house in the evening at 6.30.
> p.m. alongwith 
> my two daughters. My elder daughter must have been
> around five years 
> old and my younger one was around two years old at
> that time. Girija 
> Chetathi received my with a broad smile and hugged
> me. I could see 
> that she was really happy to see me. She immediately
> took my 
> daughters in her arms and showered them with lots of
> affection. She 
> was a genuinely nice lady. She had always been nce
> to me when I had 
> visited her earlier. She used to pamper me a lot and
> always used to 
> load me with lots of gifts.
> 
> Girija Chetathi is around forty-five years old. She
> is round and 
> rotund. A plump body, thick waist with her navel
> slightly protruding 
> and jutting out. She had big boobs, which added a
> dimension to her 
> round-ness. She had beautiful long black hairs,
> which reached, well 
> below her buttocks. I saw that she had many strands
> of white hairs 
> now. Her face was typically malayali. Beautiful
> black eyes, luscious 
> lips and a very homely _expression. I had seen her
> youth snaps and 
> she was a real beauty. But the most attractive part
> of her was her 
> skin. She had a golden complexion. Her skin glowed
> in a typically 
> malayali hue. In contrast her husband , Gopalan
> Chetan (Brother) was 
> plain and simple. He had a good personality. He was
> a rustic and 
> simpleton. He was a hard working person looking
> after our Coconut 
> and Rubber farms, which were just adjacent to our
> family house. He 
> had loyally looked after our farms and always sent
> us our share 
> every season. My husband treated him and chetathi
> with utmost 
> respect. He had told me that his chetan had really
> brought him up as 
> his own child. Gopalan Chetan and Girija Chetathi
> had two children. 
> Saroja was the elder daughter now married and living
> in Bangalore. 
> Krishnan was their son who was about 23 yrs old and
> studying 
> engineering in Chennai. Chetathi and Chetan had
> finished their 
> responsibilities and were leading a relaxed life.
> Girija Chetathi 
> was a deeply religious person and was all the time
> fasting and 
> involved in her prayers. In and around the village
> she was held in 
> high esteem for her devoutness and was called to all
> poojas and 
> religious ceremonies as a guest of honour. She was a
> very good 
> singer and she enthralled the audience with her
> beautiful 
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