Dear All
 
I think its about time that you read an article I wrote sometime back. Constructive criticism is most welcome.
 
Vicky
 
Marriage is fun! Ya Right!

 

Marriage is fun, that’s interesting as it is but realities of life makes it simply impossible to believe. Couples married for a long time are I think just growing together for the sake of it. For a woman it may be a satisfaction of being looked after or rather looked at by somebody, but for a man it’s to look after and look into every matter in detail, it’s certainly different. This note is basically to look into the psyche of a married man, of course it’s my point of view; any body who wants to contradict with my opinion can do so at their own peril.

 

For the first six months, marriage is all about sex. It’s more like adapting to new found responsibility. Responsibility of showing that you are the best (read beast) in bed, rest of the things comes after that. You ask her a million times that whether she is satisfied with your performance or not as you have already heard that nearly 80% women fake orgasms. You try to be more mature and try very hard to understand the women psyche, without realizing that no man can speak Venutian. But we still try. After all, its all about trials and well, retrials. First few days goes lying all about the never-happened things. That actually makes this relationship everlasting and interesting. So that next time when you two speak there should be something to speak about. You tell her every thing about your ex-girlfriends, the drinking sessions with your friends; show her your usual hang outs. She tends to believe what ever you are saying; you tend to believe that she never had a boyfriend and she is a definite virgin. Believe me it will come back as a boomerang, later. It’s still fun.

 

Than after six months you realize what you have gotten yourself into. Half of the women in India by this time skip on their periods, and become pregnant. Everybody is happy to see you happy. You are going to be father soon. Now you have additional responsibility to look into. Men actually look forward to being a father. They love kids. But changing diapers and washing those cute buns is definitely a no-no. We love playing with the kids but that cricket match between India and any other country, for that matter, is equally important. But real war fare starts after that. She always nags about the things you don’t have and you look for every opportunity to make her realize that she doesn’t know jack shit about preparing good and healthy meal. Your mother knows all about it. It’s still fun.

 

The mother in law of yours has a major role in your life. She is more important than a condom actually. She is omnipresent, really almost like a god. She is the best woman on the face of earth. Sometimes you think you should have got married to her as well. But I guess you are already married to her as you are married to her daughter. She is going to be there for the rest of your life, well, between you two. The day in day out battles starts at this time. You like the company of your friends, and she wants to go to her mother’s place. The interference of your in-laws increases by the day. Your mother in law knows what you had for dinner, even though you were dead drunk to know it your self. She teaches her daughter all the god forsaken recipes of nuclear waste over the cellular phone, and you get to eat that eventually. Your father in law is the only sane guy who knows where to put your money. 

 

Your parents are sworn enemies of your wife. They seem to have developed a phenomenon, not to like any thing that your wife does. Suddenly they started to dislike spicy food and your wife makes everything hot. Its guerilla war fare. They don’t like your wife’s taste of colors and she hates their taste of food. Eventually it becomes your battle; if you are going to do this to my parents I will do that with your parents. The kid is growing as a brat and you as a drunkard. It’s still fun.

 

Every woman wants her husband to be like her father, but he is like his father. Every man wants his wife to be like his mother, but she is her mother’s daughter. 

 

Then one fine day you behave like the way you should have. You tell them all to go to hell and started living your life, lonely. Oblivious to everything happening around you. You are a changed person. Taking everything slowly and in a laid back manner. That’s what they call maturity. You are finally a matured guy. You wave a white flag when your wife complains about your parents and vice versa. You instead charm her with gifts to avoid any confrontation, no matter how irritating she is. The loneliness is hazardous for life. Another woman in your life might be fun at this time. It’s not about sharing your misery with her, men are not like that. They don’t share their problems with any body. They don’t want a shoulder to cry. It’s their way of consoling their soul and to calm their nerves. They can be a real fun for the other woman. They are open and prone to every adventure. They are like kids in the Disneyland, who want to ride every “ride”. They deliberately ignore some things and sometimes innocently forget things, probably because of the laid back attitude that has developed in the recent past. After having played the dead monkey at home he gets out and has a healthy relationship with the other woman. Jumping from tree to tree. It may be an extra curricular fun for him. That’s all. The question here is why any other relationship. Actually it’s like finding a moment to unwind your self and find time for your self. Enjoying it the way you want and end it the way you want. After jumping from tree to tree, when he comes back to his home, it’s like coming back to reality, and he adapts it responsibly. The key word here is “if you fear of loneliness than don’t get married”. Well that’s how life goes. It’s still fun.

 

Written by Vicky Bablani



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