I hate the saying "Patience is a virtue." It was obviously said by a very patient person who wanted to make himself feel better by saying he was virtuous. It's a stupid saying because no one in this world is perfectly patient. Especially not me, and especially not now. "Just a few more papers to sign Mrs. Summers, and then you can take your daughter home," the receptionist told my mother. I rolled my eyes and leaned back in the wheelchair I was in. Finally, after what seemed like forever, my mom finished signing all my release forms. The nurse wheeled me out to our car, but I could hardly hear her words of good-bye and feel better. I was too excited. I would see Angel. We could be together. After Angel told me about everything that's happened that I don't remember, we spent all night talking about it. It was so wonderful, just to hear his voice. He told me that I didn't love him anymore, that I had moved on, and while he would be here for me, we couldn't be together, because when I regained my memory, I would be angry at him. I told him I would beat up my future self if I yelled at him. He laughed. I love the sound of his laughter. To me, it's the most beautiful sound in the world. He told me all about how much he hated leaving me, but he really thought it was for the best. Then, everything just came pouring out. How miserable he was without me, how much he hated Riley for everything Riley could give me, how much he hated the way things were between me and him before I lost my memory, and how much he still loved me. Then I told him how much I regretted making him sleep with me. He was shocked when I told him that. "Why do you regret it? It was the best night of my life," he told me softly. "Because of what it did to you. It was my fault, if I hadn't pressured you into it-" He put his hand over my mouth. "It wasn't your fault. I have never thought it was. It happened, and we couldn't control it. I never knew you felt this way Buffy," he told me. I nodded. "I do," I said, trying to fight off the tears that were threatening to surface. "And I didn't want to send you to Hell. I didn't want to," I said, the emotions overwhelming me. I couldn't control myself anymore and I started to cry. He held me in his arms. And then he said something that I will never forget. Something that made me fall in love with him all over again. "If you asked me to close my eyes again, I'd do it in a second." He said with so much love and trust, it made me wonder how we ever drifted apart in my future. As the nurse helped me into our car, I touch the scar on my neck lightly. I already love it. It makes me feel like there's a part of Angel engraved on me forever. "Buffy?" Mom asked as we drove out of the hospital parking lot. I look at her. "Me and you have to talk about Angel," she said. "Look Mom, I know you're upset that I slept with him, even more so that he's a vampire, but I love him. And he loves me," I say. He loves me. A smile creeps up on my face at the very thought. Mom sighs. "Buffy, you two lead two different lives. He lives in Los Angeles, and you have Riley, who's a very nice boy. Besides Buffy, you don't remember. You'll feel very different when you do. I promise. Don't cause yourself more heartache." I turned away from my mother. I didn't want to fight with her, not again. "Buffy? Did you hear me?" she asked as we pulled into our driveway. "Yes," I said. "Are you going to abide by what I've said?" she asked. "No," I told her, getting out of the car. I walked up the steps to my house and opened the door. I groaned inwardly when I heard the loud yell of "Surprise!" I was tired, but I put on my best smile and said, "Thanks you guys!" Willow came over and hugged me, and it was then that I noticed the absence of Oz. And Cordelia. I mean, I subconsciously noticed it, and Willow might've even mentioned it, but things with Angel we're taking up a lot of my time. What happened to them? "Where are Oz and Cordelia?" I asked. Then a thought struck me. "Are they dead?" I questioned, fearing the answer. "No Buffy, Cordelia lives in LA and works for Angel. And I broke up with Oz," Willow said. Then I looked around the room to see who was there. Willow, Xander, was it...yeah, Anya, Giles, Willow's friend...Tara, I think, and Riley. No Angel. "You guys didn't invite Angel?" I asked. "We all thought it would be better if he didn't come," Mom said as she walked in. "Not all of us," I heard Willow mutter. I looked over at Riley, hating him even more by the second. "I'm not going to sit by you," I said. * I wasn't listening to Riley's story about his farming days back in "good 'ol Iowa". I was thinking about the night I sent Angel to Hell. And something was bothering me. How did he get his soul back? I know the powers that screw up Buffy's life didn't do it. They wouldn't make me kill Angel with his soul. He's a warrior for them. No, Willow had to have tried the curse again. But why didn't I know about it? Why didn't anyone tell me? "Did you try to re-curse Angel from hospital Willow?" I blurted out, right in the middle of Riley's story. The table went quiet. They all know what I'm talking about. Willow looks at Xander and then she turns to me. "Yes, Buffy, I did." "Then why didn't you guys tell me? I could've stalled. He wouldn't have gone to Hell." I say. I know my face looks pained to them. "Buffy, this doesn't matter, it was a long time ago," Mom says. "Riley, please continue your story. Just ignore Buffy. She was a little rough around the edges when she was seventeen." "It does matter Mother. Why didn't anyone tell me?" I ask, standing up. I can feel the tension in the room. There's something I don't know. That my future self doesn't know either. I notice that Xander is looking anywhere but at me. "Xander?" I asked questioningly. "Buffy, this is silly. Just calm down and-" "What is it!" I demand, cutting my mother off. Xander finally looks up at me, and his eyes are filled with regret and fear. "When I caught up with you that morning, and I told you Willow said to kick Angel's ass? Well, I was supposed to tell you we were re-cursing him. And I didn't, because I didn't want you two to be together." I feel like I've been hit in the stomach. I can't form a complete thought. Xander? One of my best friends? I can feel myself taking deep breaths. "What?" I manage to get out. I know my expression is making him feel bad enough, I can tell, but at this point, I don't care. I'm scared, and confused, and now this? "Is there anything else?" I ask bitterly. "Did one of you try to kill Angel and then make him promise not to tell when you failed? Or hey, maybe someone persuaded him to leave me, for my own good! And that's why we broke up!" Mom looked away. Oh God... "You didn't," I say, knowing she had. She had done something. "Right before your graduation, I went to Angel and told him a lot of things. How you had tough choices coming up, and if you couldn't make them than he would have to. That it was better for you two to be apart. I think it's why he broke up with you. Buffy, I'm sorry, I thought I was doing it for your own good." "Yeah Buff, I did at the time too," Xander said. "I don't believe this. You destroy the one thing that matters to me, and act like it's just something I'll forget, that I'll just forgive? For people who have my best interests at heart, you don't know what's best for me at all." "Buffy, it was two years ago." I look at my mother. "It wasn't for me. It's still fresh in my mind every second. And to think two years have gone by, and I still don't know the whole truth. Now I know why Angel thinks I hate him as my future self. I probably do, thinking it was just him who decided to leave me. Just him who hurt me. God, how do you sleep at night?" I asked, looking at my mother and Xander. "This is unfair Buffy," Mom says. "No, you wanna know what's unfair? All the pain Angel and I have had to go through just to make you all satisfied." "Buffy, you have Riley now. Angel doesn't matter anymore," Xander said. Willow glared at him. I turn to Riley. He looks confused and a little hurt. I don't care. I don't know him, and I don't want to. "I just want you to know one thing," I say to Riley. He looks at me, and I give him my iciest glare. "Go to Hell." I turned around and started to leave the house. "Buffy!" Willow called after me. I looked back. "He's staying at the mansion on Crawford Street." I gave my best friend, the one I could always count on, a smile. Then I turned and walked out of my house with no regrets. Because this time it really was for good. * I knock on the large doors of the Mansion. I can hear Angel's muffled "Hold on!" and I smile. He opens the door and frowns. Why is he frowning? Then I remember that I have tear stains on my face. "Can I come in?" I asked. He nodded and I went inside. I turned and clung to him. He returned the embrace. "Why were you crying?" he asked, stroking my hair. "Xander never told me Willow was trying the curse. And my mother made you go away," I said. "Your mother told you about that?" he asked. I just kept crying. "I'm so sorry. I love you so much. You know that, right?" he asks me, and I pull away and look into his eyes. He's crying too. "I know," I whisper. Soon, we're kissing and that's all I can feel. The only thing I can think is how can you love someone so much and not burst? How can you do the most awful of things to a person and have them do it back, and still want to be with them so much it aches when you're not? I don't know how we ended up there, and I don't think he does either, but as I feel my body being laid on something soft, I know we're on his bed. "Angel...the curse..." I whisper. "Is permanent," he says. I think he might've already told me, I'm not sure, but it doesn't matter. We're kissing with a fierce intensity, and I never want to stop. "Angel, let's do it right this time," I whisper. "It couldn't have been more right the first time," he tells me softly. "Okay then," I say with a small smile. "Let's do it right again." And again, the only thing I can feel are his kisses and caresses. And as we're making love, I can't help but think that this is perfect happiness. And that's something you don't find every day. * This truly must be what heaven is like. Buffy is laying beside me, curled up in my arms, and I would stay like this forever if I could. Buffy starts to stir, and I look down at her as she opens her eyes. "You're here," she says. "It's real." I smile at her and nod before giving her a gentle kiss on her lips. "Angel," she says as we lie there together. I look at her, waiting for the rest of her sentence. "How bad does my hair look?" she asks me. I can't help but laugh at her. She's so innocently cute in the morning. "It looks perfect Buffy. In fact, I think it's too perfect." I take some of her hair and flip it over to the other side of her head. "There, much better," I say with a laugh. She smiles at me. "You've changed." "You laugh more. You smile more. You act more goofy," she says as she puts her hair back into place. "I like it." "Me too," I tell her. Soon, her lips are on mine. God, I love kissing her. She starts chuckling into our kiss and then pulls away. "What are you doing?" I asked. She lays down on the bed and grins up and me seductively. "Oh Angel, we're all alone in this big bed. Whatever are we going to do?" she says with a false pitiful voice. I grinned and pretended to think about it. "I have no idea..." I trailed off. I was still pretending to think about it when she shot up and pulled me down on top of her. "If you really don't know," she said seductively. "Let me show you." As her lips trail all over my face, my neck, my chest, my lips...Wesley's words keep playing in my mind. "Do you realize how rare true happiness is?" Yeah, I do. * "Are you sure you don't want me to come with you?" I asked her. "Yeah, this is something I need to do alone. I need to get things straightened out with everyone. You'll be here when I'm done, right?" "Yes," I told her. "And you're coming on patrol with me tonight, right?" "Of course." "Okay. Bye," she said as she gave me a gentle kiss. "I love you," she said as she walked out the door. "I love you too," I said right before the door closed. I walked into the kitchen and got out some blood. I poured it into a cup and sat down. This was all so confusing to me. I love Buffy and I love being with her. And this Buffy, she's the one I really fell in love with. The Buffy I know now has changed so much. I guess I have too. Even the Buffy from the past noticed it. The Buffy that should be here now is so different. She takes slaying differently now. Like it's a curse. Like she doesn't care about it as much anymore. All she cares about is Riley. She's even drifted away from her friends. I thought that was something that would never happen. The Buffy from the past would never let that happen. I thought leaving Buffy would be better for her and everyone else, that she could still be the same Buffy, just with someone else. I didn't want her to become disconnected with everything around her. I didn't want her to change. She did, though. I don't think she wanted me to change either. It was perfectly clear that she didn't like the person I had become when she came to LA. The problem is, I do. I enjoy life more now that I'm more open with people, I'm more easy going. I don't brood as much. I feel more alive now. I think that's the problem with me and the Buffy from now. We don't like what each other has become. But this Buffy from the past, she loves me no matter what I'm like. She even loved me when I was Angelus. Past Buffy and Now Buffy are so different, it's hard to tell that they're the same people. That what makes this so hard. I want Past Buffy to stay here, but I know Now Buffy belongs in her time, and Past Buffy belongs where she came from. The past. I know Buffy's amnesia wont last forever. When she finally gets her memory back, she'll want to go back to Riley. She'll want her normal life back. And it'll kill me when it finally happens. Because I don't think I can let go. * "How many demons do you think there are?" Buffy asked me as we patrolled the park. "In Sunnydale?" "No silly, in the world. How many different kinds, breeds, species, stuff like that. How many do you think there are?" "I don't know. I'll have to ask Cordelia, she found this demon database on the Internet. She could probably find out." "How is Cordelia?" Buffy asked. "She's good. I hope she and Wesley are doing all right back in LA." "Wesley?" "He's a watcher. He was Faith's," I told her, not sure she knew that Giles was fired last year. "Oh, okay," she said. A vampire jumped out at us, and she dusted it quickly. "I hate the ones that think jumping out is going to scare people," Buffy said. "So, how did it go today with your friends?" I asked. "I didn't see Xander or my mother, but I met Xander's girlfriend Anya. She's funny. I talked to Giles. He told me he got fired. I told him I was sorry if I said anything to upset him last night. He said I didn't. He seems pretty okay with the whole situation right now. He said we could come over for tea," Buffy said, giving me a smile as she said the last part. "Tea, huh?" I asked. She nodded. "Then I went to see Willow. I met Tara. And I found out why Willow isn't dating Oz anymore. She's a lesbian. Tara is her girlfriend. Shocker, isn't it?" "Yeah. I always thought she and Oz were perfect for each other. But I've seen Tara, and she seems nice," I told her. "She is! I don't have a problem with Willow's decision, because Willow and Tara are completely cool. They showed me this really neat spell they can do, where a rose flies all around the room." "Sounds like you had quite the day," I joked. "What did you do today?" she asked me. "Well...I slept most of the day, to tell you the truth." Another vampire jumped out at us. "I'm going to kill you," he said. Buffy staked him and said, "Yeah, you did such a good job of that," she told the vampire's dust. "I think we're done for the night," Buffy said, putting her hand back into mine. We walked back towards the mansion in companionable silence, hand in hand. I opened the door for her, and we stepped into the mansion. To face Xander. And Joyce. "Buffy, we need to talk," Joyce told Buffy. "And Angel, I have to say something to you," Xander told me. "If you have something to say to me, you can say it in front of Angel," Buffy said to her mother. "You're not in your right head. Please, just let me speak to you in private," Joyce said to Buffy. "Go on, I'll be right here," I said to her. She nodded and followed her mother out of the room. I turned to Xander. This should be interesting. "Look Angel, I've felt bad about the way I've treated you for a long time. Especially about how I lied to Buffy about us re-cursing you. I was in love with her, and I wanted her for myself. The thing is, ever since I stopped loving her, I realized what an ass hole I had been to you." "I know you've met Anya, and I'm so in love with her it confuses me. And every time I see that Willow and Anya, or Buffy and Anya aren't getting along, it kills me, because I really want them to accept her I realized that I had acted the same way towards you that Willow and Buffy do to Anya. So, I wanted to apologize for everything, and I really hope things between you and Buffy work out." I didn't know what to say. Had this really just come from Xander's mouth. "Thank you. I always knew there was a good person in you somewhere," I said with a grin. "Yeah, just don't tell Joyce. She thinks I'm berating you right now." "Oh, and you know how much I love talking to Joyce," I said sarcastically. Xander chuckled and then stopped abruptly. He looked at me in shock. "I didn't know you we're funny!" Xander exclaimed. "It happens," I said, amused. "Yeah, but I hope Buffy comes to her senses and dumps Riley, because he's a dick." I look at Xander. "I thought you two got along." "Oh yeah. I get along with Mr. Fish. He's always complaining. 'Buffy isn't here when I want her here' or 'My soldier friends don't like me anymore' or 'I'm in pain, pity me'. And he can't even fight for himself." "So I've noticed," I said, remembering how I had beat him up. "Oh yeah. I thought that was pretty funny. You know, I wish I told Buffy all this stuff earlier, it feels really good to get it all out," Xander said. Suddenly, the sounds of shouting came into the room. Buffy and Joyce. "Wanna go watch the weather happening outside?" Xander asked, eager to get away. "Yeah," I said as we went outside. I went over what Xander had said in my mind. I have the support of Buffy's friends. Our relationship has their support. Maybe things will work out after all. * I knew it was stupid to think Angel and I weren't going to run into anymore problems, that we were just going to be happy. I forgot that my mother still existed. "You can't just show up here and demand that I do what you want Mom!" I said as she pulled me into another room, away from Xander and Angel. "Buffy, I am your mother, and you are still a child," Mom told me. "No! I'm not. You tell me that I'm nineteen. That makes me able to do a lot of things I couldn't do before! Besides, you've never controlled my life. I wont let you start now!" "I'm not going to watch you destroy your life Buffy! Angel is and always will be not good enough for you!" "How do you know what's good enough for me mother? You've never known! You never will!" I said, my voice raising. "Don't talk back to me Buffy!" "I can do whatever the hell I want, and that includes being with Angel!" We both hear the front door shut, and I know Xander and Angel have left. "Why did you come here Mom?" I asked, my voice not as loud. Mom was quiet for a moment. "Because you're my daughter, and I only want what's best for you," she said, her voice going from loud to soft and loving. I shook my head. "No, you don't. If you really wanted what's best for me, you'd let me be with Angel No, you just want what's best for you," I said with tears in my eyes. "If you had really wanted what's best for me, you wouldn't have told Angel to leave me." Mom sighed. "Buffy, I'm not going to say this again, it will never work between you two. Just come home with me and we'll get this whole thing sorted out." "No," I said forcefully. "I wont go, and you know why? Because Angel and I are meant for each other! He's my soulmate!" Mom glared at me. "How can he be your soulmate when half the time he doesn't even have a soul?" I felt like I had been hit in the gut with a ton of bricks. How could she say that? How? She must've seen the pain on my face. "Buffy, I'm sorry, I-" I didn't give her time to finish. I had already started running out the door. I could hear her calling after me. I didn't care, I didn't want to care. The pain in my heart was too great. I'm still running. Tears are cascading down my face. I know that the people walking past are looking at me. I don't care. Buffy stands by the Santa Monica pier. She looks over when she feels that feeling. The feeling that Angel is near. She looks over and sees him walking in the shadows. Then he keeps going. Into the sunlight. Without burning. She watches in amazement as he approaches her. Then he's kissing her passionately, and she's responding, hoping with all of her heart that she's not dreaming... I've reached the park. I keep going. I have to get away. I have to get away... "So, lets just go with the mature plan. I call you, you call me?" "We keep in touch." Angel and Buffy come in contact. "I better go," Buffy says. "Right, remove the temptation." Buffy places her hand on Angel's. "We'll make this work, right?" It's too much. They both start to kiss hungrily. Angel is backed up against the wall. Buffy jumps into his arms and soon they're on the table. Kissing, touching, caressing... I trip and fall. I look around. I'm in the woods. How did I end up here? Where are these memories coming from? "And peanut butter! Preferably crunchy!" "Got it!" Angel runs back to the bed, arms loaded with food. Buffy and Angel both start eating. "God I love food." "Food is good." Buffy and Angel lay back, Angel with a carton of Cookie Dough Fudge Mint Chip Ice Cream. "I'm through with the whole needing to be mature thing. That time you just spent in the kitchen? It was enough time apart," Buffy says. "Too much," Angel tells her with a smile. They start kissing and ice cream falls on Angel's chest from his spoon. "Well, mortal coordination leaves something to be desired," he says with the chuckle. "Wrong," Buffy tells him. "It's just right." She licks the ice cream off his chest... I fall to the ground again. There's pain. I can feel the pain. Something's happening to me... "That's such a good sound. Thump, thump. Thump, thump." "It feels pretty amazing." "We'll find a way to make this work, right?" "We will." Buffy snuggles closer to Angel. "Angel, this is the first time I've ever felt this way. Like a normal girl, content in the arms of her normal boyfriend." Angel kisses the top of Buffy's head. "Sleep." "No I want to stay awake so this day can keep happening." "We'll make another one like it tomorrow..." Oh God. What's happening to me?" What am I seeing? No one told me about this...No one... "Cordelia, where's Angel?" Cordelia shrugs.... "It's your fault he went to fight that thing!" "What thing?...." Buffy gets to the factories to see the Mora Demon beating Angel to death. She jumps down and starts to fight... "The jewel, you have to smash the jewel..."Shh, you're all right now. Everything's going to be fine. We're together now, and that's all that matters..." The pain in my head is so great...I can't think...I don't even know where I am...Angel... "I asked them to turn me back." "What? Why?"... "I'm a liability to you, you saw that. If I stay human, I'll get us both killed." ... "I'm the only one who will remember..." "How much time?" "A minute." "A minute? It's not enough time! It's not enough time!..."I'll never forget, I'll never forget, I'll never forget, I'll never forget, I'll never-" "So, we keep our distance until time has passed, and eventually we'll-" "Forget." I scream, but not from the pain in my head, from the pain in my heart. Angel gave up the one thing he's wanted most for me. And he's been forced to carry those memories alone. Well, not anymore. * I wish Xander would've been this interesting before. We're walking over to Giles' house, and I've discovered that he can be a really great friend. I've also found out that Buffy and the rest of his friends haven't really been friends to him at all. "I have a lot of stuff I did in the past to make up for," Xander had told Angel. "The main thing being all the crap I pulled concerning you." "I appreciate that," I had told him. We reached Giles' house and Xander went in. When I didn't come in he turned around to look at me questioningly. "Oh, right," he said. "Come in." We went in and I immediately knew something was wrong. Joyce, Giles, and Riley were sitting at Giles' table with a bunch of herbs and candles and a large book. Willow was looking at them angrily, and even Tara had an expression on her face. I'm not exactly sure what it was. "What's going on?" Xander asked. Everyone looked over at us. I guess they hadn't known we were there. "Oh...Xander...Angel. You're...you're here," Giles said nervously. "What did you do?" Xander asked, noticing the items on the table as well. "They cast a spell," Willow said angrily. "They cast it before any of us got here. It was to give Buffy her memory back." I looked over to the table and saw Riley looking at me triumphantly. His face said it all. He'd won. "Oh...well, that was unexpected," was all I could manage to say. "It was no way for Buffy to live. We all agreed it was best to return her memories," Giles said. "You three agreed! I believe the rest of us were left out of the decision. Maybe some of us like this Buffy better!" Willow said. "It's the same Buffy," Riley said. "No it's not," Xander said. "Buffy is so wrapped up in you that she forgets all about everything else. Slaying and the people who love her, and that's a lot more important than being with you every second of every day," Xander said to Riley. "I don't take Buffy away from her duties as a slayer. I help her slay," Riley said angrily. "Oh yeah, and I'm sure bringing the Initiative into it was a good idea. 'Hey, let's bring the slayer into a place where slaying isn't needed. Where guns solve everything, and the people there have the authority on everything'," Willow said sarcastically. "We're the only ones in this area trained to kill creatures. We certainly do a better job than you people here. Buffy being the exception, of course," Riley told Willow. I watched this fight in silence. I didn't have anything constructive to say. How could I? Buffy had her memories back. She would go back to Riley. And I'd have to leave. Again. The yelling stopped when the door opened. I looked over and there she was. Buffy. She had tear tracks down her face, and she looked so sad. I just wanted to take her into my arms and hold her until the sadness went away. "Buffy! Thank God, I thought you'd never be you again," Riley said running over to her and pulling her into his arms. "Don't touch me," Buffy said quietly. Riley pulled away. "What?" "I said don't touch me," Buffy repeated. Could I be hearing this right? "But...don't you have your memory back?" Riley asked, confused. "Not of the past two years. Only one memory," Buffy said, looking at me. "I told you I'd never forget," she said, her voice choking. I looked at her for a moment before what she was saying registered in my mind. She remembered. She knew. She let out a small sob and ran to me. She jumped into my arms and her lips were on mine. I didn't care that we had an audience, all that mattered was that she knew. She knew. Buffy pulled away from me and started to kiss all over my face. "I love you!" she kept saying in between them. "Okay, could someone please explain this to me?" I heard Joyce yell. We looked over to see Joyce and Riley looking very angry, Giles looking confused, and Willow, Tara, and Xander happy. Buffy noticed the table then. She slowly fell out of my arms. "What's that?" she asked, walking over to the table. "You cast a spell? Without me knowing about it? What if I had been fighting a demon? I could've been killed!" Buffy said. "Buffy, just calm down. You're here now, and we can try it again," Joyce said. Try again? No... "I don't want to try again. I don't want to go back to the life my present self lives." "Buffy you say that because you don't know that life," Riley told her. "I know this life. This is the one I like. I don't want to leave," Buffy said, her voice shaking with anger and tears. I walked over to the table where the spell book was. The book was still open to the page with the spell they had used. I read the words carefully. And only one phrase caught my eye. And the forgotten memories will be returned Forgotten memories. That was it. That was why the spell didn't work. They needed to change the word forgotten. I looked over at Buffy. She looked so lost and confused. I knew that she couldn't live that way. She belonged in the past. Not here. It wasn't fair to either Buffy. "When you cast the spell, it did work, but not the way you wanted," I said to Giles. "She remembers a day that I turned mortal and we were together. I had the day turned back because Buffy would've died if I had stayed mortal. I was the only one who would remember the day. She this passage here?" I said, showing Giles in the book. "You need to change the word to past. 'And the past memories will be returned'," I said. Giles looked at me for a moment. "I always knew you we're the most noble person I've ever known," he said. I nodded to him and turned to Buffy. "What's going on?" she asked quietly. "Nothing Buffy. Everything's going to be okay," I told her. "What were you talking to Giles about? What are they doing?" Buffy asked, looking over my shoulder and Giles, Joyce, and Riley preparing to do the spell again. "Angel?" she asked. I could feel tears running down my face. She brought her hand to my cheek and wiped them away. "Something's happening, isn't it?" she asked, tears running down her own face. "Shhh," I said. "Buffy, do you remember when I said that I would close my eyes again for you if you asked? Because I trusted you. Well, would you close your eyes for me?" I asked. Buffy closed her eyes. "You're not sending me to Hell, are you?" she said with a laugh. "No," I said. I could hear them chanting. I saw Willow, Xander, and Tara looking at us sadly. "I love you Buffy, never forget that," I told her. "Never. I'll never forget," she said, tears falling down both of our faces as we both realized what she had just said. "I love you Angel," Buffy said, her eyes still closed. We kissed, our tears mingling together. Suddenly, I felt this rush of electricity run through us. I could hear the chanting getting louder and louder. We were still kissing as I saw a flash of images run through my mind. Buffy coming back from LA. Buffy finding me in the forest. Buffy taking care of me. Spike talking to us in the magic shop. Faith and everything that happened with her. Me giving Buffy the demon's heart. Me breaking up with her in the sewer. Buffy crying about it with Willow. Us dancing at the prom. Me getting shot with Faith's arrow before her graduation, her trying to get Faith's blood and failing. Me drinking from her. Me leaving. Parker taking advantage of her. Her meeting Riley. Her first kiss with him. The first time she slept with him. Faith and Buffy switching bodies. And finally I saw us, I heard her tell me those things, I saw myself walk away, I saw her chase me and I saw her get hit by a car. A surge of energy forced us apart. Once we weren't connected anymore, I stopped seeing her memories. The chanting stopped and the room was silent. I opened my eyes and saw that everyone was looking at Buffy. She looked up at Riley and smiled. "Riley!" she exclaimed before she jumped up off the ground and into her arms. They started to kiss and I felt my heart break all over again. I stood up silently and walked away quietly. No one seemed to notice. It was better that way. I walked quietly back to the mansion where my car was parked. I willed my mind not to think. I knew I couldn't handle it if I did. I got into my car and drove away. I passed the sign that said "Now Leaving Sunnydale. Please Come Back Soon" I knew I would never come back. And I knew one more thing as the thoughts of what had happened took over my wall against them. The words "I'll never forget" would still haunt me. Continue 