by Angela Jade
Rated - NC17; this is the sequel to “Quarantine” and “Return to Quarantine”. And very much ‘Alternate Universe’.
e-mail - [email protected] - constructive criticism and happy thoughts greatly appreciated.
Feel free to post this wherever, as long as it’s got this spiel at the top and it’s accompanied by parts 1 and 2.
Disclaimer - all these characters belong to Mr. Lucas (all hail) and Mr. Zahn (yay!). I write about them as a form of flattery - please don’t sue. I am not making any money from this.
March 2001
Setting - during Timothy Zahn’s “Vision of the Future”, although I don’t
believe Tim saw this happening...
The glowrod cast an eerie light over the cave walls, accentuating shadows and contours, simulating movement where there was none.
“I’ve come to a conclusion,” said Mara, her voice echoing round the empty cavern, “I really don’t like this place.”
Luke shook his head and grinned to himself. “Do you mean Nirauan, or these caves in particular?”
“Both. All of it. You know what I mean, Skywalker.”
They trudged on in silence, mechanically putting one foot in front of the other as they fought off fatigue brought on by monotony. According to the Qom Jha, the trek to the fortress would take several days at the rate they were travelling. Luke had sent them back to help Artoo catch up.
“In fact,” muttered Mara, “I think I actually hate it. With a vengeance.”
“Would you like to stop, Mara?”
“Yes. I’m dead on my feet.”
“Me, too.” He swung the glowrod round, illuminating the expanse of uncomfortable-looking rock. “What I wouldn’t give for my bed at the Academy,” he said mournfully.
“Feeling old, Skywalker?” Mara said with a grin, setting down her pack and bedroll. “I’m sure you must have slept in rougher places than this.”
Luke dropped his pack beside hers and yanked out his bedroll with a flourish. “Never by choice, Mara.” He sat on the bedroll and struggled not to smile as he looked up at her. “I usually had someone holding a blaster to my head.”
“Ah, Myrkr,” said Mara as she unrolled her own bed. “Those were the days.”
“You sound almost nostalgic.”
She sat down, crossing her legs in front of her. “Those were the days when I could make an uppity Jedi do what he was told.”
“I knew you wouldn’t kill me,” he said quietly.
“Really?” Her hand flashed to her wrist, grabbing her hold-out blaster and pointing it steadily in Luke’s direction. “Still sure?”
He raised an eyebrow. “Stop messing around, Mara, and put your toy away.”
“Aw, don’t I scare you anymore?” pouted Mara, replacing the blaster in its holster. “You’re no fun.”
“And what exactly do you mean by that?”
“I mean that you’re so busy saving the New Republic in general, and the Jedi Knights in particular, that you’re no fun any more,” she replied, her gaze daring him to contradict.
“Yes, I am!” he replied indignantly.
“Name one occasion when you did something that was fun,” said Mara.
Blue eyes burrowed into green as he considered his reply. “There was the celebratory dance after we kicked Thrawn into the next galaxy. That was fun.”
“Only because you kept getting pounced on by that gorgeous Corellian Senator. I didn’t have much fun.”
He blew out a sigh. “What about the time we got drunk and you persuaded me to help you decorate the hull of the ‘Wild Karrde’ with Hutt swear-words?”
“Doesn’t count,” she replied, shaking her head. “That was my idea.”
He lapsed into silence, thinking hard. Twice, he opened his mouth to make a suggestion, but decided neither occasion would be ‘fun’ enough for Mara, and so he said nothing. Determined to prove to his friend that he wasn’t as boring and dull as she and most of the galaxy seemed to imagine, he searched his memories thoroughly. Finally he spoke. “Mara, there’s something wrong.”
“With your capacity to have a good time? I figured that one out a long time ago, Skywalker.”
“No, it’s not that,” he replied, frowning. “There’s a gap in my memory. I’ve never noticed it before.”
“Exalted Jedi Master has forgotten something?” Mara held her hand against her forehead melodramatically. “Who will save the New Republic now?”
“It’s not funny, Mara,” said Luke seriously as he replayed his memories with the help of the Force. “Nearly four years after Thrawn’s death, there’s a space of about two Coruscant months. I can’t remember a thing.”
“Well, I never forget anything,” Mara muttered.
“So you tell me what I did, then.”
“No problem.” She sat up a little straighter and closed her eyes. Her powers of recall had always been one of her stronger traits. She was perfectly still for a long time.
“Well?” asked Luke. “Do you know what was going on?”
“I don’t believe it,” she whispered. “I do not believe it.”
“Why? What happened?”
Mara’s eyes opened slowly. “I have no idea. There’s a gap in my memories, too. Round about the same time, I’d say.”
“I have a bad feeling about this.”
“Bad feeling?” said Mara. “I’m so ticked off, I think I want to kill something. If someone’s been messing about with my head...” She let the threat hang in the air between them.
Luke sighed. “We could try to figure out what happened, Mara. If you want to.”
She narrowed her eyes suspiciously. “Exactly how do you propose to do that?”
He shrugged. “There are techniques for helping lost memories to resurface. I’m sure I’ve mentioned them before.”
“Is this an excuse to read my mind, Skywalker?”
A hurt expression crossed his face. “Of course not. I wouldn’t do that, to you or to anyone else.”
Inwardly, she struggled between the need to know why there was a gap in her memories, and the determination that no-one, not even Luke Skywalker, would have any kind of power over her again. Curiosity won out. “Fine. Let’s do it.”
He nodded and slowly moved to kneel in front of her, beckoning her to mirror his pose, before taking her hands and placing them on his temples and settling his own fingers on either side of her head. “Relax. Breathe. Sink down into that place inside you where the Force is strongest, where it helps define who you are and your place in the galaxy.”
His quiet voice banished her reservations and she allowed him to guide her, to lead her through her own mind. Slowly, her awareness of her surroundings, of the bedroll beneath her knees, even of his touch on her head, faded into nothingness. She was aware only of his voice and the well of power within herself.
“Find the blank space in your memory. Reach out to me with your mind and show me. Push at the barriers blocking your way...”
Following his words, she did as he suggested, a calm determination filling
her mind as she tried to access her own memories. Then suddenly, she could
see, could touch and feel - the events sprung out of nowhere with a strength
all of their own. It had started with a contagion...
Their bodies stiffened and they sucked in a sharp, simultaneous breath as they were abruptly assaulted by powerful emotions.
He remembered waking up to find her in his bed. Exhausted and a little disoriented, his initial shock had quickly dissipated as she’d kissed him senseless, and he could almost taste her mouth on his.
She remembered the feeling of wanting him, of needing him, of straddling his thighs as she gazed down on him, his blue eyes full of wonder and a passion he couldn’t control.
He could feel her smooth, hot skin under his hands as he caressed her body, even as she made love to him. She had whispered “I love you,” and he’d thought his heart would burst.
She shuddered as she remembered the moment of her first climax, satisfying an animalistic need that she normally held under tight control. His declaration of love had meant little at the time, but she could still recall the huskiness of his voice, every nuance of his speech.
He remembered lying on top of her, her thighs bracketing his as he thrust his way towards completion, the completion of an act that had joined their souls together forever.
She remembered a medical facility. Long days and nights without him, her body screaming for his presence, yet her memories rapidly fading no matter how hard she tried to cling on to them. When he had finally appeared in her room, weeks later, he’d held a blaster to her head.
He had never been closer to the dark side as he had been that night. Not before or since. He remembered the feeling of cold, hard, ruthless hate, of wanting to kill her. Then she had kissed him, filling his mind with sheer, unadulterated lust. The evil creature he had sought to murder had morphed into the most beautiful woman in the galaxy, someone he loved more than life itself.
Oh, Gods, she loved him! His touch had been gentle but firm, electrifying her body, paralyzing her mind. They’d made love as if there would be no tomorrow.
A lightsaber duel, then ... nothing.
Her mind-contact left his, and Mara jerked her hands away as if the touch of his skin burned her. She quickly shuffled away from him, sitting at the far end of the bedroll with her knees pulled to her chest as she trembled in shock. Slowly, she forced herself to look at the man who had just turned her world upside down.
He had fallen forward on all fours, his chest heaving as he gulped in air. When he finally lifted his gaze to meet hers, dilated pupils made his eyes almost black. “What happened, Mara?”
She looked away, unable to meet his eyes. “I think it’s obvious what happened, Skywalker.” She had slept with him, not once, but twice. She had exposed her body and her soul to him, touched him, tasted him, lost control...
He’d never seen her look so frightened and vulnerable as she huddled away from him. Carefully, he sat back, drawing up his own knees in comfort. “Juxemia?”
“Apparently.” Eventually she managed to look at him, filling her eyes with as much loathing as she could muster. “I was ill, Luke. Why did you do it?”
Her tone of voice roused his indignation. “I didn’t know you were ill. I just reacted to something that you initiated.” Reacted? Even Luke had to admit it had been more than an automatic response. Mara Jade had appeared in his bed and he’d thought all his birthdays had come at once.
“And you thought my behavior was normal?” she snapped back. “Showing up in your apartment in the dead of night, in your bedroom...” She looked away again, swallowing the emotions that threatened to engulf her once more.
His voice was quiet. “Of course, I’m so hideous and offensive that no one would ever try to seduce me because they liked me.”
“I didn’t say that.”
“You implied it.”
The silence stretched between them, filling the air with unspoken thoughts and accusations.
“I’m sorry, Mara,” whispered Luke eventually. “You’re right - I should have realized something was wrong and I shouldn’t have taken advantage of you that night. It’s just that...” He swallowed, struggling to put his feelings into words, trying to ignore the memory-induced fires that burned inside him. “I was tired and stressed and you showed up in my bed... I guess I thought I was dreaming again. I’m sorry.”
Her incredulous face turned towards his. “You dream about me?”
“I said I was sorry. It’s not something I can control.” Oh, Gods, what had he done now? He knew she was mad at him for something that had happened years ago, and now he had to open his big mouth and admit he’d had erotic dreams about her! Did he have a death-wish? He rested his forehead against his arms and closed his eyes. If she was going to shoot him, let her get it over with.
The silence stretched on interminably as each calmed down enough to examine their ‘new’ memories and consider the consequences of their actions.
“Luke.”
He looked up, surprised at the gentleness of her tone. There was no anger on her face as she watched him, her eyes glittering in the dim lighting.
“You’re not the only one who has dreams, you know.” She carefully swallowed her doubts and her pride - he needed to know. And she needed to tell him. “When I lay in that med-center afterwards, you were all I could think of. I relived our one night together over and over in my dreams until the memories slipped away.” Her head dropped as embarrassment brought a flush to her face. “Sometimes I ... I still dream of you.” She brought her head up sharply again. “But it’s not deliberate. It’s not like I go to sleep thinking of you, or anything.”
He realised his mouth was actually hanging open in shock and quickly closed it, reminding himself to breathe. Her unexpected admission had exploded a torpedo of emotions inside him and rendered him almost speechless. Almost. “Mara, are we still friends?”
She was silent for a long moment, watching him carefully. “I guess so. Why?”
“Because I’m having a terrible day and I could really use a friend right now,” he replied, inching slightly towards her.
Her arms tightened round her knees. “Are you saying memories of having sex with me are terrible?”
“No. Quite the opposite.” He smiled tentatively. “Your reaction was terrible.”
She watched him as he crept a little closer but made no move herself. “Every time I think I know you, Skywalker, every time I think I know us, something happens to send the whole thing into chaos.”
“I know.” He was close enough that he could reach out and touch her, and yet he didn’t, even though her proximity screamed out to his mind and his body. “Mara, please don’t run off and abandon me because of this.”
She pointedly looked around at the rock walls and ceilings that enclosed them. “Doesn’t look like I have a lot of choice right now.” When her gaze met his again, a hesitant smile crept across her face. Something had changed between them, something momentous. It was as if her new-found memories of two short nights of passion had opened the flood-gates to years of repressed emotions. She could be as angry as she wanted about the circumstances of their coupling, but that didn’t change the fact that the memories still burned bright in her brain, heating her whole body. For ten years she had looked at him through a self-imposed, protective shield, not daring to see him as anything other than a Jedi, a teacher, a pilot, and an occasional friend. But now she could remember him as a lover, his eyes dark with passion, his lips leaving a burning trail over her skin, his body moving rhythmically with hers as their hearts beat in unison... She sucked in a deep breath as the heated memories raced unbidden across her mind once more, before reaching out and brushing his hand with hers. “I’m sorry, Luke. It wasn’t your fault.”
He smiled, his eyes twinkling as he caught her hand and laced his fingers carefully through hers. “Makes a pleasant change, I guess.” The sensation of her hand in his induced powerful feelings, emotions that came straight from his heart. He edged closer, covering the last few centimeters that lay between them. “I wonder why you chose me that night?”
“I don’t know. You certainly weren’t the closest - it took me hours to get to you.”
He squeezed her hand gently. “We could find out. We could try to access the memories again...”
Her steely glare cut him off in mid-sentence. “No way, Skywalker. Never again.”
“Well, maybe it was your subconscious speaking, controlling your actions. You did say you’d felt an attraction between us.”
“When did I ever say that?” asked Mara indignantly, even though she already knew the answer.
“That first night, when you came to me.” He brushed her cheek with a finger. “You asked me if I felt it, too.”
His touch left her reeling, unaccountably desperate for more. “I guess I did, didn’t I.”
He sat as close as he could get to her, the left side of his body pressed against her left, and he lost himself in her eyes. Could he do this? He couldn’t back down now - her whole body was screaming to him, pulling him in like a mynock to a power cable. His body hadn’t cooled down since he’d discovered their hidden memories, and he suddenly realised that the thing he wanted most in the galaxy was to have her in his arms again. He caressed her cheek once more then slipped his hand to her neck, slowly pulling her towards him.
By the Force, he was actually going to try to kiss her! Mara’s instincts screamed at her to pull away, to preserve what little dignity she had left, but she ruthlessly suppressed that notion. It felt a little odd, dangerous even, to kiss the man she had regarded as a friend for ten years, but she had to know the truth. She had to find out if the emotions she had felt in her memories were purely Juxemia-induced or if there was something more...
Their lips met and the world beneath them fell away, time and space irrelevant as the passion they had so recently re-experienced exploded once more, filling them both with a desperate desire, a need for each other. He pulled her closer, losing himself in her kiss, unable to even contemplate that she might back away. If she did, he didn’t think he would survive.
But Mara couldn’t have pulled away even if she’d wanted to. She sank gratefully into his embrace, her hands sliding round his back as she pressed her body to his, deepening their kiss. There was no self-control. There was only ... him.
He held her tightly, as if he could absorb her body into his. The taste of her mouth, a recently rediscovered memory, became a delightful reality. Fingers fumbled with unfamiliar fastenings as pent-up sexual frustrations finally burst out of their confinements. Somehow they managed to struggle out of uncooperative clothing without pulling out of their embrace.
She yanked him down onto her bedroll, her mouth quickly finding his as her mind and body ached for him, yelling her desire in his brain. The Force around them was filled with lust, with a hunger for each other that had to be satisfied. His hands roamed over her body, refamiliarizing themselves with the contours and textures he had discovered years before. Dipping his head, he kissed her collarbone and suckled at her breasts, revelling in her moans of pleasure and wincing as her fingernails pressed into his back.
She held him tightly, her muscles tensing as he moved over her, leaving a trail of fire with his mouth. She longed to have him inside her, craved his touch, desperate to reach the pinnacle of feelings that were rapidly spiralling out of control. Then he was above her once more and she gazed into his eyes, seeing both the farmboy and the Jedi Master, her friend and her lover. His mouth descended on hers as he plunged into her, one arm slipping under her as she arched up against him.
They moved in perfect synchronization, two people merging into one, claiming their own pleasure at the same time as pleasuring the other. Their sighs and moans echoed around the cave, as passion echoed through their minds, lifting each other higher and higher, threatening to overwhelm them with its power.
Unstoppable.
Incomparable.
Destiny.
They cried out at the moment of orgasm, their minds subsumed by the intensity of their physical and mental contact. Clinging to each other, they rode the waves of emotion that crashed over them. Bodies drenched in sweat, hearts pounding wildly, lungs heaving in oxygen, they slowly regained the powers of speech...
He kissed her, gently, sweetly. “Gods, Mara, that was...”
“Incredible?” She pushed sweat-soaked hair from his forehead, running her fingertips over the contours of his face. “Amazing?”
“Unbelievable. What in Kessel happened?”
“I think we’ve been through that already, Skywalker,” said Mara with a smile. “I seduced you, you seduced me...”
“I can’t believe we did that all those years ago and completely forgot about it,” he replied.
“I can’t believe you tried to kill me, Skywalker,” she replied, her eyes narrowing to laser-beam intensity.
He grinned lop-sidedly. “I guess that makes us even, Jade.” Leaning down to nuzzle her neck, he whispered close to her ear. “Told you I knew how to have fun.”
“Luke?” she whispered, smiling.
“Mmm?”
“Shut up and kiss me.”
Artoo-Detoo knew he was an incredibly complicated piece of machinery. Due to a lack of memory-wipes, his already-sophisticated foundational programming had evolved into something approaching true sentience. Yet he saw his role as a simple one - supporting and protecting his owner. So when he turned a corner of the Nirauan cave system and saw his master apparently wrestling for his life with the human that had previously threatened to kill him, Artoo’s logic circuits went into overdrive.
They were naked, a fact Artoo filed away as inconsequential. The ex-Emperor’s Hand rolled on top of Master Skywalker - Artoo wasn’t sure if she was trying to suffocate him or strangle him, but he was groaning in pain. The little droid decided he had to intervene to save his master.
He rolled slowly forward, his arc welder extended in front of him...
THE END