e-mail - [email protected] - constructive criticism and happy thoughts greatly appreciated. Flames laughed at.
Rating - PG-13 (for one naughty word)
A response to the overuse of the term “R & R” on fanfiction.net.
*places tongue firmly in cheek*
I’ve written this cute little fanfic
It took me a whole afternoon
No time to re-read or to spellcheck
I really must post it up soon!
For you see, I have an addiction
Not drugs, no, not so mundane
But I need my regular fix of reviews
Or I swear it’ll drive me insane!
So please read my wonderful offering
There’s Ani and ’Dala and Ben
No action or plot or excitement
A word count of four hundred and ten.
Maybe I can finish it later
Then post it all over again
I’ll bump it back up to the top of the page
Perhaps more reviews I will gain.
Now I’m begging you, please read my fanfic
I’m down on my knees over here
Then simply click on the ‘review’ link
And tell me, “I love it, my dear!”
Just don’t mention grammar and spelling
’Cos I can’t be bothered with those
And paragraphs and punctuation
Are optional - everyone knows.
So call me an excellent author
Don’t tell me my writing’s a joke
Don’t want no negative reviews at all
Just please give my ego a stroke.
’Cos, let’s face it, I’m better than you are
So credit where credit is due
I’m too lazy to write out a summary
So I’ll just say “PLEASE READ AND REVIEW!!”
Oh, come on - why aren’t you reviewing?
This fic is as good as I get
I’ll review yours if you review mine
When you post on fanfiction dot net.
I’ll whine and I’ll beg and I’ll grovel
If I could, I would sit in your lap
Why will no one review my story?
Could it be that it’s actually ... CRAP?!?
;-)