I can not cope with this torrent inside me.
I must not set it free.
I must push it down and swallow it before I drown in misery.
Bury it for a few more years,
so I don't have to cope with the oceans of tears.
And fathoms of pain, and the feelings of blame.
It simmers there and stains me deep.
Corrupts my every action,
every feeling and reaction.
But when I'm weak, it begins to seep,
to bubble to the surface, and break from its shell,
and then I have to bleed and hurt myself to save me from this hell.

Written by AML 10th July 2002