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An Introduction
Many people have asked "Who are you?" "Where do you come from?" and "Isn't it about time you went back there? So, for all of you here is a potted history:
I was born the seventh daughter of a seventh son of a seventh son. This, of course, gives me magical powers. I can, for instance, walk through doors and over water and, naturally, I can fly with, or without, my broomstick.
Although I wear the traditional black dress and cloak, long associated with witches, my lineage means that I am actually a Sorceress and entitled to wear a red hat. This, unfortunately, has its drawbacks due to the other tradition associated with this colour hat. In the winter it can lead to chilblains.
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I do not have a black cat, being allergic to them, but find that a Boa Constrictor is just as good at keeping down the mice, discourages unwelcome visitors, and can be used to squeeze oranges.
Being a Sorceress is not all magic and merriment the local populace look to me for succour in their time of trouble. Many a night I have just been settling down to a nice bowl of eye of newt and toe of frog, with dumplings, when there has been a knocking at the door. "Come quick Desiderata they cry-your help is needed." To which I at once respond. "B****R off. I'm having my tea"
I have never, contrary to populer belief, turned anybody into a frog. However, I am quite good with tarantulas and the picture (above) is of my friend Horace.
The Future
Now we have left the Century of the Glorious Gumboil and entered the Century of the Stuffed Weasel we turn our thoughts to the future. How many more skeletons will be let out of closets and will they all dance in the streets on Walpurgis Night? Will we win the lottery and if we do will it change us. Too Right it will!
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