Have you ever listened to those old songs, the ones with feelings? I have. It's so interesting when you can match up the lyrics to your life. I think I might just be poor Ellenor Rigbey, picking up the shattered peices of my life, only to have them cut me because my life was nothing more than a dream. Pacifism is a dream.
" Waits by the window, wearing the face that she keeps in a jar by the door, who is it for?"
Quatre R. Winner. Heir to a fortune. Business man. Pleasent all around guy. Nice. Innocent. That's my mask. My 'face'. I slip it on whenever I leave the house, my room even. Can't have morality drop because happy little Quatre isn't smiling. Happy little Quatre my ass. I want to hurt something. Slice it, slowly. Watch it bleed. I know it's wrong. I know. I don't care.
"All the lonely people, where do they all come from? All the lonely people, where do the all belong?"
Alright, yes. I know I'm not the only one hurting. I've seen Duo, watched him, curious. His smile is gone now. He left it on the cliff... maybe he threw it over in place of himself.
He's probably regreting that. I'd regret it.But I can't help him, that's Heero's job. Heero is the Superman in this song, not me. He's the one that Duo needs. I don't care. I don't.
"Father Makenize, writing the words to a sermon that no one will hear, no one comes near.
"Look at him working, darning his socks in the night when there's nobody there, what does he care?"
I've preached peace. I've tried that 'fix the world' thing. It's not working. Nobody cares. I'm numb now, to everything. Why should I care, if nobody else does? I'll keep fighting of course. Need to cut them, watch them bleed. Need to hurt, to hate.....
...To feel.
"All the lonely people, where do they all come from? All the lonely people, where do the all belong?"
Duo will just have to help himself.
..... I'll try not to enjoy watching him bleed.
Ah. My tea is ready.
"Ah, look at all the lonely people....."