Okay, I wrote this story AGES ago, and I know it's out of season...but...here it is! And I'm very, very sorry Davis fans. I really don't hate him any more. :( Please forgive me...I'll love you forever! ^_^ ::gigglez:: I'm also very, very sorry that I couldn't center this...so if it comes out all ugly 'n stuff, that's why.
And one more thing...No Ken. He apparently doesn't exist for me...
V2K+1
~Valentines 2001~

A couple little warnings: I don't like Davis. So if you do, I don't say anything too mean, but I'm definitely not nice to him. And every once in a while I just shorten everything to a couple sentences, so I don't have to write the boring or physically improbable parts. Oh, yeah, I should probably add a disclaimer�
Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon, I probably never will. If I did, I would make Tai and Sora become the reality�but I digress. All names and similarities in this story are purely coincidental, except for the characters I used from Digimon. So basically the only made up character is the Evil Digimon later on in the story. Enjoy!
Another little warning: I basically lose the Valentines Day theme after the first paragraph. But, what the hey, here's the story.

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"6 days until the Valentines Day dance!" Kari laughed, scooping up a handful of snow and packing it into a loose snowball.
She lobbed it at the back of T.K.'s head. "6 days!" she sang again.
"Hey Kari!" Suddenly, Davis jumped out�and took the snowball meant for T.K.

~SpLoOsHpLoP~

"Oops, sorry, Davis�" Kari giggled. "I didn't expect you to do that�"
"Oo! Ee! Ah!" Davis didn't hear her because he was jumping around because snow had gone down his coat.
T.K. turned around and laughed. "Hey, Davis, you heard Kari. The dance isn't for another 6 days!"
Patamon popped out of T.K.'s bag. "I guess he's practicing!"
Gatomon popped out too. "Looks like he needs it."
Everybody laughed except Davis.
"It's not funny!!" he protested. "Hmmph. Well, Kari, what I was going to ask you was�would you go to--"
T.K. interrupted him. "By the way, Kari, wanna go to the dance with me?"
Kari's heart skipped a beat. 'I'd love to!" she chirruped.
Davis turned dark red. "Hey, J.B., who do you think you're doing? I was gonna ask Kari to the dance!"
T.K. looked at him, confused. "J.B.? That doesn't sound anything like my name."
Kari sighed. 'He'll never learn." She smiled up at T.K. and linked her arm through his. They walked off that way, to the deep chagrin of Davis.
"One day�" Davis growled to himself, "That T.S. is gonna pay!"
-dun dun dun-

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Yolie and Cody stood in a clothes store at the mall.
"This one?" Yolie held up a dress. "Or this one?"
Cody sighed. "Geez, Yolie, when you asked for my help, I didn't know you meant choosing clothes!"
Yolie stamped her foot. "Cody, you don't know how important this is to me! It's the Valentines Day dance, for goodness sake!"
Cody put his head in his hands. "Do you even have a date?" he asked.
"Well, no, not yet, but�Poromon!"
Poromon woke up from his nap with a jump. "Aww, what is it, Yolie? I was dreaming about food!"
"Which dress?" she demanded.
Poromon yawned without looking. "The red one." He mumbled sleepily.
Yolie shook him awake. "Poromon, I wasn't even holding a red one!"
Upamon chuckled. "He he, she caught you, Poromon!"
"Sure did!" Cody agreed. "Come on guys, let's go. I don't think we're being much help to Yolie."
He grabbed their Digimon and fled. "If you need us�" Poromon called back. "We'll be in the food court!"
Yolie shook her head hopelessly. "I'm never gonna find a dress at this rate."
Just then, Sora and Tai walked by, eating ice cream.
Sora waved and called out, "Hi, Yolie!" She walked over. 'What's up?"
Yolie sighed. "Cody and Poromon were supposed to be helping me find an outfit for the Valentines Day dance, but they ran off on me!"
Sora handed her ice cream cone to Tai. "Sorry, Tai, but I've got to cut this date short. Yolie and I have some shopping to do!"
Yolie perked up. 'Really? You'll help me? Oh, thank you sooo much!"
Tai walked off eating both ice cream cones. "Bye Sora! I'll pick you up at 8:00 for the dance!"
Yolie raised an eyebrow. "You and Tai are going together?"
Sora blushed. "Yeah�he just asked me�we're renting a limo and everything!"
Yolie got a dreamy look in her eyes. "Oh�I wish I was going with someone�someone cute and nice and cute and funny and cute and sweet and cute and considerate and-"
Sora cut her off. "Come on, Yolie! We've got some serious shopping to do!"

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"I've got to get Kari back." Davis told Demiveemon. He paced back and forth across his room. "If only T.Y�"
"T.K." Demiveemon interrupted.
"Huh?"
"His name is T.K. TY is actually a phenomanonly successful company, maker of Beanie Babies. The Beanie Baby fad caught on many years ago, and grossed a total of�"
"Who cares!!!" Davis interrupted. "I've got to keep Kari from going to that dance with T.K.!!"
"I feel a diabolicly clever plan coming on�" Demiveemon murmured.
"I've got it!" Davis shouted. "A diabolicly clever plan! If T.K. never shows up for the dance, then I'll sympathize with Kari, and she'll fall in love with me!"
"How will you keep T.K. from going?" asked Demiveemon.
"I'll glue his door shut with peanut butter!"
Demiveemon blinked. "Didn't you say diabolicly clever plan?"
"SHUT UP! I've got to come up with something�Think, Davis, think!"
He started pounding his head against the wall. "Think, Davis, think�
I've got it!" He shouted again.
"What?"
"A massive headache."
"Really?" Demiveemon commented. "I woulda thought your hair would absorb most of the shock!"
"AARRGGH!!" Davis shouted.
And so it continued, for many hours.

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"I'm going to the dance with T�K�" Kari sang, skipping home.
Gatomon was being bounced around in her backpack with a couple of notebooks, the D-Terminal, and a math book. She poked her head out.
"Kari, if you wouldn't mind, would you please stop bouncing around. Not all of us are enjoying this as much as you, you know."
Kari giggled. "Sorry, Gatomon. I know I'm acting silly, but I'm just so excited!"
"Aaah, young love�now would you please STOP SKIPPING!"
Kari sighed. "Sorry again�OH MY GOODNESS!!! I JUST REALIZED I HAVE NOTHING TO WEAR!!!"
"What!?" Gatomon yowled. "Well, then, let's go! I'm not gonna let you ruin your very first dance just because of some silly clothes!"
Kari set off at a dead run towards the mall.
Gatomon's last words before she got all the breath knocked out of her were�
"And will you PLEASE STOP BOUNCING!!!"

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To make a short story shorter: Kari and Sora and Yolie all go shopping and find very beautiful outfits for their dances. But no one wants to have to read all that, do they?
Meanwhile, back in the insane asylum�Oops, I mean Davis & June's home�

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"Think Davis think, think Davis think�" Davis had kept up his monotonous chant for 4 hours straight, and he didn't show signs of stopping anytime soon.
"I've got it!" Davis shouted again.
Demiveemon sighed. "You better not say that 'headache' line again. You've said it 47, no wait, 48 times already and it's getting really old."
Davis hmmphed. "Well, if you've got any ideas, I'd like to hear them."
"How about you just forget about going to the dance with Kari? I mean, you should be happy that she's happy and she's happy with T.K.!"
"What does he got that I don't�" Davis grumbled.
"Well, besides the obvious choices of intelligence, a sense of humor, and good looks, he's saved Kari's life a couple of times. Gatomon told me all about it!"
"THAT'S IT!" Davis shouted. "Oh, this plan is so diabolicly clever, I can't believe someone like me came up with it! HAHAHA! Take this, C.K.!"
Demiveemon turned around, plugged his ears, and closed his eyes. 'I don't even want to hear about it." He opened one eye a little and peeked out at Davis. "By the way, his name is T.K. CK actually stands for Calvin Klein, a successful and popular clothing line, which was created in�"
"Shut up! You're making me lose my train of thought! Well, it's obvious Kari only likes T.K. because he saved her life! I mean, what other reasons are there?"
"Didn't we got through this already?" Demiveemon asked.
"Be quiet. All I'm saying is, if I put Kari's life in danger, then save her, she'll like me better than that�that�er�help me out here, Demiveemon�"
"Handsome, clever and funny basketball star?"
"Not quite the phrase I was searching for�um�Oh, just forget it."

And so the path of Davis's twisted mind continues its course.

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Quick review of Davis's evil plan: To somehow contact an evil Digimon, point out their location, somehow get rid of T.K., save Kari and keep all the glory. So far, the plan has worked (don't ask me how) up until the point where Davis tries to get rid of T.K�
P.S. It's the afternoon before the dance.

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"But why?" T.K. protested. "Yolie and Cody have already gone for help, and sending out me and Patamon wouldn't be smart at all! We have to stay together, in case we're attacked. There's safety in numbers!"
Davis was starting to sweat. His plan wasn't working quite right.
"Just go! Don't you think I can protect Kari?"
"Well�" T.K. started, but Kari jumped in.
"If you don't mind, Davis, I would feel safer if T.K. was here. If Patamon and Gatomon both digivolve, we're an unbeatable team! We shouldn't break that up!"
Davis turned beet red. "Aarrgghh! I don't want to hear about how great you two are anymore! I'm sick of it, ok? Now if you don't mind, let's get attacked, so I can save you, shall we?"
T.K. frowned "You want to be attacked? But why?"
Kari was thinking the same thing. Both of them exclaimed at the same time�
"HEY! This is all part of some diabolicly clever plan, isn't it?"
Davis stuttered "Er�ah�well, you see�"
But his idiotic utterance was cut short by an attack by the scariest, most evil, cheating conniving sickening Digimon ever to sing a corny song�
BARNEYMON!!!!!!!!!!
AAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
OH NO!!! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!!!
Um�forget that�
"Oh no, it's Barneymon!" Gatomon exclaimed.
"Who's Barneymon?" Kari asked.
Patamon responded, "He's the scariest, most evil, cheating conniving sickening Digimon ever to sing a corny song!"
"Um�ok."
"No time for talk now, we've gotta run!" T.K. grabbed Kari's arm and dragged her away terrifying site.
Barneymon followed, his eyes filled with visions of vengeance, hate, and people who are special.
'I wuv you, you wuv me�" he sang�
Kari, T.K., Davis and their Digimon all ran for their lives, covering their ears, trying to shield themselves from the horrific sound.
"You know�" T.K. panted as they ran, "If you're into free-association, this is actually an ironically Valentines Day-themed attack!"
"Naw�" Kari disagreed, "Monzaemon's hearts thing was sooo much more Valentines-Day-ish."
"Well, considering the circumstances, this isn't all that bad! I mean, the underlying theme is love!"
Davis and Veemon looked at each other, still running for their lives. "Does anyone know why we are talking in such a weird way, let alone having a rational conversation?" Davis asked.
"Nope." "Uh-uh." "Not me." "Not a clue."
"I do!" Veemon piped up. "It's because the author of this fic was actually aiming for a romantic Valentines Day story when she began writing this, but when reading it over, realized it has practically nothing to do with Valentines Day, and the only use of it is to give Davis an excuse to come up with a diabolicly clever plan, and she realizes this story is so far gone she might as well give up on making it plausible and actually try to make it funny! I don't think it's working."
Everyone stared. But their surprise made them vulnerable�they had stopped running long enough for the slightly-out-of-shape Barneymon to waddle close enough to attack them again.
"Gosh and golly gee, hu hu!"
T.K., Kari, Gatomon, Patamon and Veemon all dodged out of the way�but Davis wasn't so lucky. As the beam of fluorescent purple, green polka-dotted light hit him, a terrible change began�
No it didn't. I was originally gonna make him into a cheerful dinosaur Digimon like Barneymon, but I don't feel like it anymore. Let's just say he dodged, ok? In fact, let's pretend Barneymon doesn't exist at all. The true enemy is�
JUNE!!!
"Hi, guys�" she giggled annoyingly. "Is Matt here?"
"Oh great." T.K. snorted. "We COULD have gotten destroyed by an evil-yet-somehow-endearing children's show icon, but getting destroyed by Davis's older sister? How demeaning."
"Yeah." Patamon agreed. "And it's not like we can attack her, because even though everyone hates her, there is no killing of humans on this show."
"She's human?" Kari asked.
"Um, guys�" Gatomon interrupted, "Don't you think we should get back to the story?"
Kari and T.K. said together, "Naw. Maybe later."
Kari checked her watch. "Uh oh!" she exclaimed. 'I have to get going�I want to look nice for the dance, and it will take me a while to get ready!"
"I'll walk you home!" T.K. volunteered.
"And we'll be your bodyguards!" Patamon and Gatomon followed their friends.
"Well, Davis, I guess your plan failed." Veemon sighed. "And we had to go through all of those last minute plot changes, too. What a shame."
"Aww, it's not so bad." Davis answered. "I mean, what if I had turned into cheerful dinosaur Digimon? Even if this story is corny, and stupid, and off the point, at least I'm still me. And June only had one line�that's good!"
"Speaking of June�"
"What is it?"
"Can we leave her here, in the Digiworld, alone and unprotected?"
"Hmm�ok."
"I get her room!"

And so it ends. Happy for everybody, totally messed up, and very little to do with Valentines Day. Hope you enjoyed!
THE END!
P.S. If you don't think it's happy for Davis, look at it this way�I got rid of June for him!

Oh yeah! Bai the way...I posted this for myself! ^o^ ::wipes tear:: I'm so proud...Anyhoo! Massive thank you's goin out to SuperSora, for originally posting my stories for me (Lylas Sora-chan!) and Shorty-chan (Heero No Miko) of .::d.e.n.i.a.l::. for teaching me how to post on my own! ^_^ Thanks again! This new knowledge is a good thing for me (I get to post anything that pops into my head!), and bad news for you (I get to post anything that pops into my head!). Reader be warned. Taiora-4-Ever! Love yah all!











                                                 
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