A FISTFUL OF TRAVELLERS CHEQUES:
SEASON 2 : SHOW 4
FIRST SHOWN : JANUARY 21ST 1984
WRITERS: Peter Richardson, Pete Richens and Rik Mayall
DIRECTOR : Bob Spiers
Channel 4 ,10.30pm, 45 minutes
CAST :
ADRIAN EDMONDSON ---------- Billy
DAWN FRENCH ---------- Jackie
RIK MAYALL ---------- Carlos
NIGEL PLANER ---------- Paul
PETER RICHARDSON ---------- Miguel
JENNIFER SAUNDERS ---------- Shona
KEITH ALLEN ---------- Mr Bastardos
DANNY PEACOCK ---------- Barman
CHRISTOPHER MALCOLM
Carlos and Miguel are Englishmen obsessed with the mystique of the Old West-- would-be gunmen ever in search of a brawl. Traveling the countryside by public rail on a fantasy holiday, in costumes straight out of a Spaghetti Western, they hook up with spunky Australian tourists, a hippie hitchhiker, and a mass-murderer who works in an abattoir but dresses as a matador.
QUOTES:
Ticket Collector: Tickets! [gets ticket] Ehh What's this gringo?Carlos: It's a Euro-Rover - old man.
Miguel: [ding] Hey, double B and B for one night capitan.
Hotel Bastardos Manager: Get your hands off my counter tourist filth!
Miguel: I think I like this place. Make that two weeks.
Hotel Bastardos Manager: If you wanta soft toilet paper you go to Hotel Gayboy. You whinging Pommies.
[Miguel and Carlos facing each other, Western showdown style]
Carlos: You start the row.
Miguel: I went first last time!
Carlos: No you didn't. Miguel -
Carlos: Did;
Didn't;
Did;
Didn't;
Did
Carlos: *Did-not!* Sorry, have we started yet?
Miguel: 'Course I have you great tosser.
Carlos: Allright. Start again.
Miguel: You calling me a liar?
Carlos: Yes!
Miguel: Well then, you're going to die.