Ace Backwords Semi-Explained

Ace Backwords Semi-Explained

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Hi. I'm Ace Backwords. I was born in 1956 and died at some unspecified date thereafter. In between I did a bunch of stuff. I recently, at age 46, actually learned how to log onto a computer. So it just goes to show you can teach an old dog new tricks. In fact, if you had an infinite number of dogs clawing away at an infinite number of computers throughout eternity, eventually they would write the collected works of Shakespeare. Or else the Web Site of Ace Backwords. So that explains how we've gotten here so far.
Perhaps some biographical data is in order here. I've written this out 3 times already, but each time I hit the wrong button (apparently) and the thing dissapears into the bowels of cyberspace, or whereever it went. So I'm already chagrined at this great loss of literature. Anyway, it all began a long time ago in a place not unlike here, only different. I hitch-hiked out to Berkeley from New Jersey when I was 17. By 19 my life had crash-landed into the dirt. Literally. Spent several years sleeping on an off-ramp overlooking the Bay Bridge in San Francisco. Published my first cartoon in the late great Berkeley Barb on the weird date of July 7, 1977 (7-7-77). I realized shortly after that I didn't have the talent to make it as an underground cartoonist. But lacking any other discernible talents I spent the next 15 years trying anyways. In between I published 10 issues of a punk rock/art tabloid ("Twisted Image" 1982-1986)and managed to accumilate a bit of minor league fame as a fanzine cartoonist and pornographer. Leading up to another stint of sleeping in the dirt with the other homeless bums (1995 to 1998). And the rest is history. Or a bad joke. If theres a difference.
So that brings us up to the present. I'm back and I'm Backwords. I have a new book out, published by Loompanics: "SURVIVING ON THE STREETS: How to GO DOwn WIthout Going Out." Why, its fabulous. And you should certainly order a copy today (www.loompanics.com). Meanwhile, I'm going to press another button and see if i lose this fucXing writing too.
.........your cyber-buddy ACE BACKWORDS...over and out.....

The picture above is an unexplainable blob of computer protoplasm. I'm told its not harmful, but if you stare at it too long its been known to lower the sperm count of laboratory rats. MAny scientists believe that the enclosed graphic eminates some sort of psychic/cyber aura designed by the heinous mad-men at Yahoo Global Headquarters to render us completely under their power; mere pawns, slaves of cyberspace forced to toil for the rest of our days in front of a computer typing and viewing god knows what, helplessly hypnotized by the Yahoo overlords of cyberspace as they surrepitiously suck the brains out of our very frontal lobes while seemingly embarked on the harmless diversion of creating and reading web pages on the computer screen. Don't move. We have you surrounded.

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