Dear Bunkio,
Bunky leads to Dorky, Dorky leads to Bunky,
Bunky leads to Dorky, Dorky leads to Bunky,
Bunky leads to Dorky, Dorky leads to Bunky,
stuck I got, oops,
Bunky and Dorky lead to Bunghole Island,
Bunghole Island leads to talkng to a katoot,
talking to a katoot leads to Complaining to Bunky...
...which leads Yoda to wondering why there is no where
to ask advice of a patoot (a little further forward from
the katoot). Be good this would, patoot advice. Sick
of giving advice on women I am. Patoot advice needed on
island.
~Yoda~
Complainer Yoda,
Eh sorry, no patoot advice here, ya sicko. You kould try asking Dorky's Bunghole...bungholes are prolly quite knowledgeable in the patoot area. Just uh keep your patoot away from our island, k?
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
iam not getting any
~jim~
Complainer jim,
Well, jim, I'm not exactly sure how you want me to help with this complaint. What kan I do? I kan go thru a whole list of stuff that's prolly wrong with you, but you're obviously already a yittle self-conscious right now so I don't think my list would help any. I kould say sumtin like "It's nuthin you're doin, you just need to find some nicer girls/guys," but that's a buncha krap and I hate lying. So, I suggest you ask Dorky's bunghole for some advice, she might be a yittle more supportive.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
I want to munch your carpet, just like Dorky.
~The Tounge~
Complainer The Tounge,
Munching my carpet has seem to become a popular subject in the complaints I've been gettin, but my carpet is not to be munched - esp. by those who kan not spell "tongue" correctly. Sorry, but that excludes both you and Dorky, so there shall be no munching of the carpet. And, yah, that goes for everyone else - leave my carpet alone, damnit.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
If Bunky is "butt" and "monkey" combined into one word, then whadt da heck is Dorky?
Complainer [email protected],
I'm guessing you're wondering what "dorky" means and not what species Dorky belongs to, but that works out good for me because I do not know exactly what Dorky is. Anyway, "dorky" is "carpet muncher" and "chicken molester" combined into one word. Now, I'm sure you're prolly wondering how I get that from "dorky". It's quite simple - Dorky is a carpet munching chicken molester.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
why are u using my e mail name and can you tel moi
wot this site is all about . i am a profesional and i
dont wont me name used by some sadlifes wot might bugger me reputatian
Complainer [email protected],
Judging by your spelling, I'm guessing you're a "profesional" loser. I don't think any "profesional" would like to have my name, anyway. Do you even know what "bunky" stands for? Let me enlighten you - it's "butt" and "monkey" combined into one word. You're ruining YOUR OWN "reputatian" by using this name. Next time you chose a name, I suggest you research it a little better.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
I write to Bunghole. Nuthting. I again ask Bunghole
for much needed advice. Nuthting. My life is swirling
into the dismal anal abyss because of this, cantcha
doer somting bout the Bunghole? Dorky's Bunghole not answer questions, not givem adervice. Now I's plugged up cause of it.
~Consterpated~
Complainer Consterpated,
Oh.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
Okay, Bunky, this is getting on my nerves! I was in the store and
...... well, what is this stuff called "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter" ?? if it's not butter, then WTF is it?!?!?!?! I mean, you could call anything in the whole supermarket "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter" if yer stupid enuf!!!! You could look at friggin lawn furniture..." I can't believ it's not butter!" "That's right, it's lawn furniture." "I know! I was expecting butter!" "Yeah, well I Can't Believe Yer Not Locked Up, Ya Friggin Moron!"
~Nix Mom Rules~
Complainer Nix Mom Rules,
I'm sorry but i do not go around reading the ingredients of "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter," therefore, i kannot tell you exactly what it is. And, yah, im not gonna waste my time trying to find out so i guess youre gonna have some sleepless nights ahead of you. sorry.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
I am interested in vacationing at Bunghole Island. Is there a hotel or sumtin i kan stay at? i wuld pay you 50 centz for one night. What u think? if not, i am also wondering if i could purchase one of your islands! Name a price
~Nick~
Complainer Nick,
I regret to say that there are no hotels on �unghole �sland. If you wish to visit, you must sleep with the rabbitasaurus' but be careful, they sometimes like to nibble on visitors. Unfortunately, none of our islands are for sale at this moment, but as soon as they are, we will let the public know.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
I am madly in love with you, and have prepared a place
for you in my room. I had my Mom put in 'bunk' beds,
and you would get your own one. Now, I am only 12,
but I would let you have your space, and be mature
around you. Oh my complaint? You are gonna shut me
down right? :(
~Prepared~
Complainer Prepared,
Well i kould understand how you'd be madly in love with me, but i regret to say i kannot move in with you. See, if i did that, i would hafta leave Dorky. She would be completely miserable without me...no one would feed her, change her diapers, clean up after her, remove things she has managed to get lodge up her nose, pick up her herpes medication, etc etc. She'd be helpless! However, if you kan find a nice home for her with a family who would take good kare of my yittle Dorksky, then i would be able to consider living with you.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
1. You have um no picture of yourself here...
If you are goin to go to all the trouble of
having a page, might as well. Don't ja tink?
2. Dorky's 'Katoot' is fun to talk to, and it is
a good thing. If people could complain to your
earlobe, or tit, or big toe, whatever you are
into, your complaint form would be just a bit
more funny, and as popular as Dorky's 'Katoot'
I should add.
3. FYI, statistics show, boys like gurles's
bungholes. So stop sugchesting that we kneed
help. Well not really.
4. Y'all are sumtin, but you should let me say it
first. If you toot your own horn too much, you
may become addickterted, then you the one who will
need help.
~Crazy~
Complainer Crazy,
dude, KALM DOWN! You dont ga get all sassy with me.
1. This isnt one of those gay pages thats full of pictures of ourselves, info about us, what we
like and dont like, etc etc. We see pages like that ALL the time, and yah that gets really
boring.
2. If I had a page where people talked to my body parts, then i would be too much like dorky,
and that cannot be. Also, this page is meant to be a yittle more serious than dorkys bunghole
since i am, of course, the mature one workin this page.
3. Im sure guys do like gurls bungholes, but its not all guys that talk to dorkys bunghole.
Also, it has not yet been proven that dorky actually IS female, soo be careful about whos
bungholes you go around talkin to.
4. I DID let you say that we were cool first, i just thought that while we were on the topic of
how cool we were, i'd get a few words in.
Now that I have responded to all of your complaints, I ask that you pop a midol and stop yer
whining.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
Hey, why not list your losers.org award on your award
page. I would be proud of that one. Why should you?
Your page is cool and funny, fuck them loser nominating
hoes. Where else can I talk to a girl's bunghole?
~Crazy~
Complainer Crazy,
Yah, yah, im gettin to puttin that on our page..dorky and i are just a yittle lay-z right now (im suprized im even answerin this). But yah, our page is cool and funny, like you said, and we rock and are cool and yah people should respect us and treat us like the groovy, stellar people we are or sumtin. But, bein proud of talkin to someones bunghole isnt a good thing. I dont see why dorkys bunghole is so popular..who wants to talk to someones katoot? You people need help.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
yo daddy tdoes have a pic iu seen and humped it HEY SON LET"S HAVE SEX???PLEASE TPOMORROW?? I hump you harder that a Shit comming out of my daddies ass and have my loss skin and old vagina alol wrincally and so sticky a power magnet couldn't get it off oll over you and you'll think of MEEEE!!!!!
~Yo mamma~
Complainer Yo mamma,
I have no idea what you just said, but ok sure, have fun.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
I can shove my whole foot up my own ass....I have a pic of it!!!!!!!!!!!
~Yo Dadda~
Complainer Yo Dadda,
Uh yah, thats quite a trick, but this is a complaint page so are you complaining because you can shove too much of your foot up your katoot or are you complaining cuz you kant get your whole leg up there? Either way, I kant help you, sorry.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
Your page sucks,,,,you suck.....the whole dragon thing
sucks.....dorky sucks. If you want to argue the fact that you suck....my email is [email protected] and my icq# is 56774990
~Doobie Doobie Doo~
Complainer Doobie Doobie Doo,
Yes, I realize the page sucks right now because Dorky and I have slacked off a yittle, and that's prolly why you think I also suck. I'm aware of all this so no, I would not like to argue this. But I'm glad that you brought up the fact that Dorky sucks. Yes, I've had many complaints about her, and I kan understand why, so I've decided to start a petition. Those of you who think Dorky sucks, just go there, sign the petition, and, if I kan get a fair amount of signatures, I will dispose of my yittle dorky friend and you all will be happy.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
Congrats on making the Losers.org page!
~anonymous~
Complainer anonymous,
Thank you! It's not very often that I get a compliment instead of a complaint. But yes, Dorky and I are aware that someone put us on the losers.org page so we give you permission to stop sendin us bunghole krap, complaints, etc. about it.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
bunk: you dont know me, but some wierrrrrrrrd person invited me to some chat room thing on instant messenger and i was looking at all that info stuff and you had a web page so i visited it and it makes no sense and its dumb and youre going to write back and all this shit about how i need ICQ and what not and about Pow WOw whatever that is and if you want to email me to yell at me, just fuckin do it. [email protected]
~Alleygato~
Complainer Alleygato,
Uhh wtf are you talking about? It would be a lot easier to respond to this complaint if I knew what you were talking about and exactly what you are complaining about. Try sending me a complaint that makes SENSE next time.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
Why did everybody switch to ICQ?? Why doesn't anybody use PowWow anymore? What was wrong with PowWow? How come eveyrbody changed? I liked PowWow (I'm not saying I hate ICQ...Its okay) but I miss PowWow. I think we should all go back. Besides all those dumb URL's about ICQ charging is getting annoying.
~PowWow Girl~
Complainer PowWow Girl,
Everyone switched to ICQ because it's kewler than PowWow. PowWow got old and borin and uh old. No one cares if you liked PowWow better than ICQ, and people(especially me) could care less about what you think. And if you have a problem wit ICQ and the yittle URL thingyz, then maybe YOU should switch bak to PowWow. You kan go bak to PowWow, no ones stoppin you, but everyone else is stickin wit ICQ.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
your stupid alien crashed my computer. DUMB ALIEN!!!!
stupid alien thinks he's gonna hurt me too!!! BITE ME U STUPID ALIEN!
:)
~Lauren~
Complainer Lauren,
I'll go over this once again. You were warned to stay away from the pissed off alien, yet you all click on it and complain to me. If you have a problem wit the Alien page, THEN DON'T GO TO IT. If I get one more complaint about the Alien page, I'M NOT ANSWERING IT! So, uh, yah..stop sendin me that krap about the alien.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
I HATE UR STUPIE ALIEN PAGE, DONT CLICKIE ON DA ALIEN PEOPLE OR U GET STUCK, FOR AWHILE, DORKY IS A DORK AND BUNKY IS A..PERSON TO COMPLAIN TO, YAH, THATS IT, U GUYS SUCK, EHEHE
~DAN~
Complainer DAN,
So, you didn't like gettin stuck at our Alien page, huh? Well, it clearly said next to the Alien "Don't bother this alien..He's anti-social and hates everyone." Wouldn't that give you a clue to stay away from it? Hmm? And why don't you tell Dorky yourself that you think she's a dork? You're not obligated to come to this page, so if you think we suck, you don't hafta come bak. (By the way, what is up wit caps lock?)
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
Theres this guy and he pages me too much and I think he
may be obsessed wid me or somethin so can u like make him
go away??
~Mystery Lady~
Complainer Mystery Lady,
Alison..do you have nuthin better to do wit your time but complain to me or sumtin? *sigh* Well I kant tell this guy to go away cuz I don't even know who he is. Plus, I think you ENJOY being paged 24/7 by this guy, so really, why are you complaining to me?
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
~CA3B~
Complainer CA3B,
uh..wtf's your complaint?!
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
my friend called and told me he was sick and was um, coughing up blood. i thought it was gross.
~grossed out~
Complainer grossed out,
uhm..i really didnt need to know that, but since you so were so thoughtful and told me, then I'm GLAD you're grossed out.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
ok, theres this girl and i really like her, ALOT. and she really likes me. And she wants to score with me but i diont know if i'm ready yet but i really want to so uhh, tell me what you would do if u were in my shoes.
~Preppy~
Complainer Preppy,
uhh say no..ur not ready
and THIS IS A COMPLAINT PAGE! Go ask Dorky's Bunghole for advice..
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
I found a Fork and showed it to you. Do I ever get my
Fork Award? No I don't. I'd like to make a formal
complaint: I WANT MY FORK AWARD...IT TOOK ME 3 HOURS
TO FIND A FORK!
~Alison~
Complainer Alison,
I thought I sent you the fork award! BUT, I guess I'll be a nice yittle bunkenhosen and send you the fork award again, but only if you QUIT UR WHINNING..and uhm..yeah..if I hear ONE MORE THING ABOUT THAT, IM GONNA KICK YOU IN THE NADS..so uh there.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
There's no more survey!! *sad* Why did it go away?
You took away the best part of your page. It's like
taking *gag* Barney *puking* away from a little childer.
It's just wrong wrong wrong!!! Bring it back please
*begging on hands & knees* please please please!
~Need I state my name?~
Complainer Need I state my name?,
DAMNIT ALISON! STFU ABOUT THE FRUCKEN SURVEY BEFORE I KICK UR KATOOT..but uh if you gimmie $100, I'll put the survey back up..soo you should do that.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
You told me to complain so...umm...I don't feel good.
I couldn't go to school today cause I woke up at like
4 this morning and puked and I still feel like crap
and uh...good choice on the Slotz of the month but not on
da gay guyz. Well, I think I'm gonna throw up so, bye!
~ME~
Complainer ME,
I DONT WANNA HEAR ABOUT YOU PUKING! Go tell dorkys bunghole that...she enjoys hearing that stuff for some strange reason.
�Thank You, Drive Through�
Dear Bunkio,
All my friends are coming on to me! Help Help Help.
~ME~
Complainer ME,
uhm if you want all ur friends to NOT come on to you, you should become a non-slot..and uh dont wear slotty clothes..or act slotty...and uh have a sex change..that should stop people from coming on to you.
