(The scene opens on black and white footage of a parking lot as "One Vision" by Queen begins to play. We see the Thugz rapidly exit their Impala and walk into an arena through a door marked "Wrestler only". Cut to a hallway, where Mike Janiack is interviewing Biggie Z. Cut to a corridor, where the Artful Dodger, in his multi-pocketed jacket, is warming up by shadowboxing. Cut to the locker room area, where Lady Jezebel is helping Sean McKenzie tape up his wrists. Cut to the wardrobe room, where Hot Shot Donovan is posing before a full-length mirror. We move to an area just behind the curtain entrance onto the rampway, where the camera is positioned just behind The Judge, who is wearing his street clothes. We walk through the curtain onto the ramp with him, standing behind The Judge as he gazes at the empty arena and watches the ring crew put the ring together. The Judge raises both hands in the air... ...and the image is transformed from black-and-white to color. The arena is full, the fireworks are going off, the crowd is cheering (soundlessly), and The Judge is in his powdered wig and robe. Cut to a shot of Dax Lemming, in a tuxedo, at the timekeeper's table. He rings the bell, we see a close-up of the hammer striking the bell, and the SWF Ringside Report logo is superimposed over the bell. The music begins to fade as we cut to Mike Janiack, Dax Lemming and Cat Spencer in the studio.) (The camera pans around showing what the studio looks like. On the wall there are various pictures of wrestlers. Some of the pictures are of Pagan executing the Final Judgement on HardRock, The Judge holding up the International title, Moon Dog Gator executing the D-Dog-T on Doug Bacon and a picture of all the Church members. Cut to the other side of the studio where copies of all the Championship belts are in there various cases, hanging on the wall. The camera closes in on the belts where the name of the title holder is, right beneath the belt in gold plating. Cut to right behind the announcer's table where a picture of each announcer can been seen. The camera pans around some more until finally focusing in on the announcers once again.) MJ: Welcome, everyone, to the return of the Ringside Report! We have been gone for many months, but the SWF felt it was time to bring the show back. And who better to have as hosts then... DL: The man, Dax "The Maxx" Lemming. MJ: And our newest friend.... CS: ... Cat Spencer. Hello everyone, I'm new to the SWF broadcast table. But so far, I feel like I fit right it. DL: Try doing ATW, then say that. MJ: As you see, Maxx and Cat are having somewhat of a rivalry. Well, that's because the two will be fighting for the interview segment of the show. And yes, there is a new Television champion, we will have that story and many others, right here on the Ringside Report. Right now, to break the ice, let's have Dax tell us about his interviews segment. DL: With pleasure, Mikey. Fans, my segment will be called "Maxx Factor." What I plan to do is interview the top SWF superstars. I'll get background info, and I'll asking 'em the real tough questions. Because we here at Maxx Factor don't take any prisoners... yet. MJ: Thank you Dax. Now to Cat Spencer... CS: Well Mike, my segment would be called "The litter Box." DL: [Raising his hands and looking up.] Thank you for your help, dear lord. But I don't think I'll be needing it with the name that loser has... MJ: Shut up, Dax. CS: Thank you Mike. As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, my segment will be called the Litter Box. And since Dax and I both have to do the same thing on our shows, mine too will have background information, and I too will be asking the tough questions. And, no doubt, that I would have the greatest and the best SWF superstars on. DL: Copycat... MJ: Well you're right Dax, he is a Cat. [Mike smiles looking rather pleased with himself.] MJ: Umm... okay. On this show, the Kold Blooded Killaz will be in the Litter Box, and we'll have a re-cap of the whole week. Plus we'll have some rumors for y'all, I'll be doing those. DL: And folks, you know where he get's 'em? From the SWF Hotline! That has a 50% accuracy rate! SO stay tuned, you don't wanna miss this blast off episode of... All the of them: .... The Ringside Report. ------------------------------------------------------------- Commercials for TT, Hostile Takeover '98 and Snapple Iced Tea. ------------------------------------------------------------- MJ: Welcome back fans, we'll start off with a re-cap of Slaughterhouse. I take you now to the Corel Center where this Slaughterhouse took place. CS: And what a Slaughterhouse it was Mike, with Biggie Z righting the Animal, Hexx taking on Trinity's own, Hot Shot Donovan and Boom Boom Obuhowich took on The Truth Teller. A bang up card? I would say so. MJ: Of course, and let's go straight to the action... with the first match of the evening. At the beginning of this match, we heard some... DL: Really dumb news! MJ: Wait your turn, Dax. Let's go to the Madness/Thugz match. -------------------------------------- ['Madman' by Silverchair blasts out of the arena speakers. Insanity and Madman appear at the top of the aisle, and make their way to the ring, earning a moderate crowd reaction.] TM: "And here is the first tag team for this match." LC: "Yawn." ["Head Like A Hole" by Nine-Inch Nails starts to play. The T.w.O. video is being shown on the Frencktron. Corporal Punishment and Deaf Leopard come down the aisle. Deaf Leopard is carrying a couple shirts with him. The crowd is booing loudly.] LC: "The T.w.O.? What are they doing here?" TM: "Maybe they're filling in for the Thugz." [Corporal Punishment and Deaf Leopard enter the ring and walk over towards Madness. Corporal Punishment pulls out a microphone from his pocket and begins to speak.] CP: I know you guys are anxious for your match against the the Tag Team champs, but I think you can wait a couple more minutes. As you all know, those traitors, those Benedict Arnolds, those backstabbers, Monster Mark and Future Technology decided to leave the Third World Order. [The crowd lets out a slight cheer.] They thought that they could do better on their own. A lot of people have said "The T.w.O. is done for. How can they survive with just 2 members?" Trinity did it, and we're a hell lot tougher than they are. Now, Leopard and I were scoping out the tag team scene to decide which tag team we should induct into the T.w.O. We looked at Ground Zero. They had promise, but that Kaneda guy is such a pansy. We also looked at the Thugz. After all, they do have the titles. But we know that they won't hold on to them very long. As a matter of fact, we think their title reign is going to end here tonight. You guys have what it takes to become the Tag Team champs. And because of that, we would like to ask you to join the Third World Order. Deaf Leopard has 3 of our T-shirts here for you. So will you put on the T.w.O. colors, black and blue? [Madman, Insanity, and Crazygirl confer for a moment.] Madman: Corporal, it would be an honor. [The crowd starts to boo. Deaf Leopard hand Madness and Crazygirl their T-shirts. They put them on.] CP: You have made a wise decision. It is an honor to have aboard. I would wish you good luck. But you won't need luck to bring the gold home to the T.w.O. You will win because you are T.w.O.! [The group exchange handshakes and then Corporal Punishment and Deaf Leopard headback to the locker rooms.] LC: "Did any of that make ANY sense whatsoever to you?" TM: "Not in the least." LC: "Ok, good. I'm not alone in this. But, it seems like Madness has joined the T.w.O." -------------------------------------- DL: Good god, Madness have joined the T.w.O. What has this world come to? CS: What indeed. The T.w.O have been a force in the SWF for a while now. Coporal Punishment has been a great leader for them, and obviously so with the recruitment of Madness. He knows what he is doing, and he knows how to tackle the big obstacles. The obstacles I'm talking about? Well the O.n.E. They broke off from the T.w.O just recently, and they too are a powerful force. And with Madness added to their line-up, the T.w.O will be a force to be reckoned with, indeed. MJ: Huh?! DL: Cat, buddy. You are aware that the T.w.O and the O.n.E are the job squads of the SWF, right? Because what you just said made no apparent sense. Much like Madness' choice to join the T.w.O. And just for you, while I was listening to this, I called up the Betty Ford center, and they'll get you off whatever you're on. CS: Dax, did ever occur to you that I was joking? You think I meant what I just said? If so, you're on whatever I'm on, but doubled! MJ: Hehehe. DL: Don't you get it, Mike? He's trying to fool us so he doesn't have to go to the Betty Ford Center. Don't worry sweetie, they're very... rough there. You'd love it. MJ: Stop it you two. Or I'll take the interviews segment and that'll be the end of it. Agreed? DL and CS:[In a whiny voice.] Agreed. MJ: Great, I'm glad that was settled. Now, in case anyone was wondering, the Thugz one that match, rather easily, I suppose. DL: You suppose?! It's written is the damn laws of physics! Anybody who joins the T.w.O are O.n.E will never win another match, no questions asked. MJ: Thank you Dax... I guess. CS: Ignore him Mike. Let's just get back to Slaughterhouse. MJ: The next match on Slaughterhouse was the Truth Teller taking on Boom-Boom Obuhowich of S&F. Let's take a look at the end of the match. ----------------------------- Boom-Boom Obuhowich goes through the ropes. Sean Ceigersmidt counts: 1. Sean Ceigersmidt counts: 2. Boom-Boom Obuhowich knocks Truth Teller into the ringsteps. Boom-Boom Obuhowich sets up Truth Teller on the table. Boom-Boom Obuhowich executes a legdrop through the table. The table didn't break. The crowd is on its feet cheering for Boom-Boom Obuhowich. Boom-Boom Obuhowich goes for a roundhouse right, but Truth Teller blocks it. Truth Teller is handed a road sign. Truth Teller hits him with the road sign. The crowd is going crazy. LC: "A road sign? Oh sure. Now we have criminals in our midst. I wonder if that fan works for Trinity?" TM: "It's an effective weapon. I wonder what it says." LC: "Stop. Bumps ahead." Truth Teller hits a spinebuster slam on Boom-Boom Obuhowich. Truth Teller throws Boom-Boom Obuhowich back into the ring. Truth Teller catches Boom-Boom Obuhowich in a single-leg takedown into a leglock Boom-Boom Obuhowich reaches the ropes after being trapped for 7 seconds. Truth Teller throws Boom-Boom Obuhowich out of the ring. Truth Teller jumps onto him with a running elbowdrop. Sean Ceigersmidt counts: 1. They're brawling inside the ring area. Sean Ceigersmidt counts: 2. Truth Teller reenters the ring. Boom-Boom Obuhowich follows him back in. TM: "Back inside before the ref can count them out." Truth Teller kicks Boom-Boom Obuhowich. Truth Teller has the crowd going wild. Truth Teller kicks Boom-Boom Obuhowich. Truth Teller has the crowd going wild. Boom-Boom Obuhowich chops Truth Teller. Boom-Boom Obuhowich kicks Truth Teller. The crowd is going into a frenzy. Boom-Boom Obuhowich executes the Choke Slam on Truth Teller. The crowd is going into a frenzy. TM: "Boom-Boom lands his finisher!" LC: "That's what, one for Boom-Boom, two for SoothSayer?" TM: "Truth Teller." LC: "Whatever. They both spout off ridiculous theories." Boom-Boom Obuhowich goes for the pin. Sean Ceigersmidt counts: One, two, three. The crowd is giving Boom-Boom Obuhowich a standing ovation. ------------------------------ DL: Was there any doubt in anyone's mind that Boom-Boom wasn't going to win? Just look at the guy! He's a monster! Plus he's psycho. If you watched his last flash, you'd understand. CS: Correction, The Judge is psycho, Boom-Boom is just a little mad. DL: This is how he gets when he's a little mad? I shutter just thinking about how he'd get when he's REALLY mad... that would be... it would be, just horrific. MJ: If you both look at the big picture, Boom-Boom doesn't have a partner, due to injury. So he is forced to go out into singles wrestling. He's not used to it either. The man has got to get a little bit pissed, who wouldn't? I just don't want to see him get any madder, or the superstars of the SWF will be in a world of pain, as is said on Mad TV. DL: You watch Mad TV? MJ: None of your business. DL: I didn't want to know anyway. CS: Calm down you too... it's not nice to fight on live TV. DL: You're one to talk, Spencer! You folks want a nice tid bit of info on our pal, Cat Spencer? Well he once intruded on an MTV gameshow, claming he was the ninth wonder of the world, and then revealing him self, if you know what I mean, to the audience. Who, I might add, were not pleasantly surprised. CS: You said you wouldn't tell! DL: I lied... sue me. MJ: Moving on... Hexx and Hotshot Donovan fought after that. It was a superb matches, with lots of action, but in the end, Hexx cam out on top. This match was a "King of the Mountain" match where there is a ladder in the ring. And to win, you must stand on top of the ladder for three seconds. CS: Now this was a classic match. Both superstars giving it there all, knowing only one of them will walk out, the victor. I guess it just wasn't HSD's day. DL: Indeed it wasn't. MJ: Next we got the Biggie Z Zack Adams/Rock 'n Roll Animal match. This was originally supposed to be between Biggie and Sean McKenzie, but Sean canceled at the last minute, complaining of stomach cramps. CS: He was just afraid of the Toughman champ DL: Tough? Man? Gimme a break! MJ: Control yourself, Dax. CS: Let's take you to the action. And by the way, this was a barbed wire, four corners match. --------------------------------- Zack Adams executes the Zack Attack on Rock 'n Roll Animal. Zack Adams hits Rock 'n Roll Animal. Rock 'n Roll Animal hits Zack Adams. Zack Adams chops Rock 'n Roll Animal. A fan at ringside badmouths Zack Adams. LC: "That does it! I need to go talk to that guy!" [Larry removes his headseat, and heads down to ringside to converse with the fan.] TM: "Oookay." Rock 'n Roll Animal punches Zack Adams. Zack Adams kicks Rock 'n Roll Animal. A fan at ringside badmouths Zack Adams. Rock 'n Roll Animal kicks Zack Adams. The crowd is giving Rock 'n Roll Animal a standing ovation. Rock 'n Roll Animal punches Zack Adams. Rock 'n Roll Animal chokes him with the barb wire. Rock 'n Roll Animal hits a knee to the back on Zack Adams. Rock 'n Roll Animal hits him with the barb wire. Rock 'n Roll Animal goes for a punch, but Zack Adams counters it with an armbar submission. Rock 'n Roll Animal is valiantly trying to break the hold. Zack Adams lets go after 20 seconds. TM: "Nice attempt by Zack to wear down Animal. Armbar submission would not have been my first choice, though." Zack Adams hits Rock 'n Roll Animal. Numerous fans are using Zack Adams for target practice. Zack Adams kicks Rock 'n Roll Animal. Numerous fans are using Zack Adams for target practice. Rock 'n Roll Animal hits Zack Adams. Zack Adams chops Rock 'n Roll Animal. Numerous fans are using Zack Adams for target practice. TM: "And it seems fans definately don't like Zack Adams. Throwing everything from popcorn to discarded pop cups at him." Rock 'n Roll Animal punches Zack Adams. Rock 'n Roll Animal whips Zack Adams into the turnbuckle. Zack Adams comes back and rocks Rock 'n Roll Animal with a kick to the midsection. Zack Adams hits Rock 'n Roll Animal. The arena is exploding in a chorus of boos. Zack Adams chops Rock 'n Roll Animal. Numerous fans are using Zack Adams for target practice. Zack Adams executes a powerslam on Rock 'n Roll Animal. Zack Adams chokes him with the barb wire. Zack Adams hits a DDT on Rock 'n Roll Animal. TM: "A choke with barbed wire! That has to take its toll on Animal." [Larry returns a moment later] TM: "Well?" LC: "Nice guy, he is. And he has no love for Biggie Z." TM: "Who does he like?" LC: "I am not saying." Zack Adams goes for a DDT, but Rock 'n Roll Animal counters it with a small package. Rock 'n Roll Animal goes for a flying sunset flip, but Zack Adams counters it with a choke lift. Rock 'n Roll Animal is struggling to reach the ropes. Rock 'n Roll Animal is valiantly trying to break the hold. Rock 'n Roll Animal reaches the ropes after being trapped for 5 seconds. Numerous fans are using Zack Adams for target practice. Zack Adams hits turnbuckle number one. Zack Adams hits turnbuckle number two. TM: "Zack has two turnbuckles down, two to go." LC: "Animal will stop him. Watch and see." Zack Adams hits turnbuckle number three. LC: "Any second now....." Zack Adams hits turnbuckle number four. ------------------------------- MJ: 'Twas a great match, but not to be for out Rock 'n Roll Animal. Biggie Z took his street fighting experience and used it to crush the Animal. DL: Biggie Z, a street fighter? What a joke! This guy couldn't beat his mother if... if... if she were dead! CS: Very creative, Dax. MJ: Dax, Biggie Z beat just about the toughest man in the SWF, Sandman, and cleanly. 1,2,3... in the middle of the ring. DL: Sandman was drunk. CS: If you're drunk when you go to fight, you shouldn't be champion anyway. DL: It worked well for Mike Tyson. MJ: Would you stop it? Please? DL: Why? I'm on a roll... CS: Trust me, you're not. DL: Am too! MJ: Boys, please. Let's get back to wrestling. And let's get back to Biggie Z. He's a former International champ and is the current Toughman champ. Promising future? DL: He'll lose it his first defense. CS: Umm.... no comment. DL: Chicken Shi... MJ: Fans, we have to go to a commercial break, but up next we have highlights from Triumphant Tuesday and hopefully Dax will have washed his mouth out with soap... DL: Not bloody likely. CS: Don't go away... ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Commercials for Cherry Coke, Head & Shoulders and "Banjo-Kazouie" for Nintendo. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- MJ: We're back with more Ringside report coming to ya. CS: You know, since it's returned to the air last January, Triumphant Tuesday has been the number one rated show, ever Tuesday night. And why should it be different this week? Let's see what went down this week at Triumphant Tuesday. MJ: The first match has Deaf Leopard taking on the new comer, "The All Around Athlete" Kip Douglas. DL: Why must we even review this match? Blah, blah, blah, Deaf Leopard loses... again. CS: Dax, do you have to have a lude comment after everything Mike says? DL: I don't _have_ to... I choose to. CS: Hopeless, utterly, utterly hopeless! -------------------------------- (Deaf Leopard hits Kip Douglass with a legsweep. Deaf Leopard executes a legsweep on Kip Douglass. Deaf Leopard hits Kip Douglass with a flying kneedrop. Deaf Leopard is getting a good reaction from the crowd. Deaf Leopard hits an inverted power bomb on Kip Douglass. Deaf Leopard goes for a double underhook suplex, but Kip Douglass blocks it. Deaf Leopard begs off.) Chip: The veteran T.w.O. member senses trouble here. Fool: Kip caught him. (Kip Douglass nails Deaf Leopard with a spinning backbreaker. Kip Douglass is eliciting a sizable round of boos. Kip Douglass whips Deaf Leopard into the ropes, but Deaf Leopard reverses it. Deaf Leopard misses with a clothesline. Deaf Leopard goes for a belly-to-belly suplex, but Kip Douglass counters it with a punch. Kip Douglass places Deaf Leopard on the turnbuckle. Kip Douglass nails Deaf Leopard with a superplex. Kip Douglass is eliciting a sizable round of boos.) Fool: He planted that stupid headbanger. Chip: Douglass could get the pin right here, but he's picking Leopard up instead. (Kip Douglass executes a bridging back suplex on Deaf Leopard. Jeff Hart counts: One, two, three. Kip Douglass further incites the crowd.) ---------------------------------- MJ: This was a pretty average match, with Kip Douglass coming out on top. He won his debut match, and his future looks promising here in the SWF. What do you say, Cat? CS: I feel that Kip Douglass has a superb further in the SWF. From what he's shown in this match, I think he can go far. Maybe even become a world champion sometime. DL: Aren't you going to ask my opinion of the match? MJ: Um, ok. What was your opinion Dax? DL: Don't have one. I prefer to ignore matches with t.W.o members or ex- t.W.o members. MJ: Why do you even... moving on. CS: Might I remind everyone, that in The Litter Box, I'll have the Kold Blooded Killaz. DL: Are you done plugging YOUR segment? I thought this was OUR show? CS: No Dax, this is Mike and my show, you're just here 'cause Mike wants a friend. MJ: Hey! CS: It's true, though. MJ: In other news, the masked man we saw last week on TT came back at the end of the Hexx/Jagged Edge match. We take you now, to what wet down... ----------------------------------- (The masked man in black from last week is running down the aisle. At least it LOOKS like the guy from last week. We can't tell...because of the mask. He hits the ring.) Chip: That's the guy who Face Planted Tanner! He's got Hexx! (The masked man whirls and DDT's Hexx into the turnbuckle.) Chip: D-Dog-T on Hexx! That's Mr. Meteorite's old move! (The masked man is running back up the aisle. King Cobra is chasing him.) ------------------------------------- MJ: The masked man struck yet again, against Edge. DL: What I'm wondering if he's in cahoots with the MIA... 'cause he didn't even tough Edge. MJ: Who knows, but anything's possible here in the SWF. CS: Mike, do you get your sayings from different organizations? MJ: I might... DL: Guys, I just realized something. When the masked man strikes, he always uses the moves of old SWF wrestlers. Such as Equalizer and Mr. Meteorite. Could this mean the return of the two? What if Equalizer and Mr. Meteorite have teamed up, and hired someone to impersonate them? CS: And why would they do that? DL: 'Cause the bastards are too lazy to do it them self. CS: Oh, look! The masked man! DL: Ahh! Where?! [Dax gets up from his seat, and runs out of view.] CS: Finally, he's gone. MJ: He'll be back. CS: And why do you say that? MJ: Because I'm driving him home. CS: Ah. MJ: Next, folks, there was a title change at Triumphant Tuesday as the Artful Dodge took on Tanner Boyle. Here is what happened at the end of the match. ----------------------------- (The Artful Dodger hits a springboard dropkick on Tanner Boyle. The Artful Dodger hits Tanner Boyle. The Artful Dodger chops Tanner Boyle. A wave of boos is going through the crowd. A small "Tanner Boyle" chant is being started. The Artful Dodger hits Tanner Boyle.) Fool: Those morons can cheer for Tanner Boyle all they want. It won't matter. Chip: The crowd is getting behind the challenger. (The crowd is booing The Artful Dodger. The Artful Dodger chops Tanner Boyle. A wave of boos is going through the crowd. The Artful Dodger whips Tanner Boyle into the turnbuckle, but Tanner Boyle reverses it. Tanner Boyle charges into the corner, but The Artful Dodger moves out of the way. The Artful Dodger runs into the ropes. Tanner Boyle misses with an elbow.) Chip: They're still running the ropes. Fool: It's three seconds away from being over. Watch for the Robbing You Blind. (The Artful Dodger hits an avalanche on Tanner Boyle. The Artful Dodger is eliciting a sizable round of boos. Tanner Boyle nails him with a low blow. Tanner Boyle is getting a good reaction from the crowd.) Chip: Bray missed it. And the Dodger is in agony! Fool: Dammit, no! (Tanner Boyle executes the X-Plosion on The Artful Dodger. Tanner Boyle goes for the pin.) Chip: X-Plosion! Fool: Make it stop! (Chad Bray counts: One, two, three.) ----------------------------------- MJ: Yes, folks, Tanner Boyle is the new SWF Television champion. CS: Artful Dodger had a good run, while it lasted, but he can now move on to bigger and better things. Maybe a shot at the International title? MJ: Maybe, or possibly even a World title shot in the near future. CS: I don't think so. Dodger hasn't proven himself that much, and who wants to fight Mr.Shhh? They are also stablemates, and I don't think the Church will approve of one of their own, going after the title of Shhh. MJ: That is very true. Cat, another highlight of TT was the person we saw before the Trinity vs. The world match. He was the same guy who threatened the Fool... CS: This man is rumored to be an old SWF wrestler. I feel something big will happen because of his return. MJ: Take a look at this... -------------------------------- (The music stops as the lights begin to flicker. The video wall goes blank.) Chip: That's not good. (After a moment, the video wall comes back on. A dark silhouette stands in front of the camera, against a grey concrete wall. No light is visible, except one from off-camera, shining onto the wall behind the figure. A familiar voice speaks, but can't quite be placed.] Figure: "Greetings to the SWF. You must want to know who I am, but I will only tell you this: Fate works in mysterious ways. When my name is ready to be revealed, you will know it. Not before then." Fool: That's him! The guy on the phone call! Chip: Are you sure? Figure: "I have some qualms about the future of this federation, and it's many wrestlers. The Church of Pain, the new bullies on the block. A group of thugs who adopt the traits of that which they seek to destroy. And Trinity, a group of people who don't know if they are coming or going, and have to sell out to the Underground in order to survive. I will tell you this, the Underground is running the SWF, not either of you." Fool: What is he talking about? Chip: I don't know. I think this might be the guy who's stalking President Frenck as well. Figure: "To Chip and The Sporting Fool. Fool, what a fitting name. The man who petitions to become the official Trinity spokesman for the SWF, and then runs away when one of its members takes a shot at you." Fool: Oh, no! Chip: Don't worry. The Church said they'd protect you. Fool: That's a good point. Figure: "To the so-called fans of the SWF, I can only say this. It's your money. Spend it wisely. And to President Frenck. The SWF Run of Death is approaching. How fast can you run, Frenck? Not fast enough, I would endeavour to say. In case you haven't figured it out, Satan is coming to the Supreme Wrestling Federation. When? I'll let you know. In the meantime, I suggest you pack your bags. I advise you book your tickets. I warn that you get out of town. But most importantly, I tell you to gravel in fear. Fear is coming. Beware the Reaper." ------------------------------- MJ: Beware the reaper... strong words. Almost something like Pagan would say. CS: Who knows why this man his here, or what he plans to do, I just can't wait to learn who he is. MJ: Well, next up is the Sven vs. Trinity match. Before we go to the match, now we already know who Sven's first partner is, Fatal Fury. But let's see who Sven's other partners are... CS: I wanna see what happened in the match! MJ: Hold your horses. -------------------------------- Jeff: And their opponents, weighing in at a total combined weight of 597 pounds, here are Sven Pieterson and Fatal Fury!! (We see Sven Pieterson and Fatal Fury walking down the aisle together, discussing strategy. The crowd is cheering them on.) Fool: That's it? It's 5 on 2? Chip: Wait a minute. Here comes the Giant Killer! He's running out to join them. Jeff: Joining them for this match, at 250 pounds, from Greenland, The Giant Killer! (The Giant Killer catches up with the two, and starts talking to Fatal Fury, when the Revolution logo comes on the video wall. "Song #2" by Blur plays as the crowd cheers.) Fool: Oh, no. Chip: Here comes Boom-Boom Obuhowich! (Boom-Boom and Master of Pain emerge from the curtain to another ovation.) Jeff: Weighing in at 315 pounds, from Chicago, Illinois, Boom-Boom Obuhowich! (Fireworks go off behind Boom-Boom as he raises his arms in the air.) Chip: Team Sven is gaining momentum! It's five on four! ---------------------------------- MJ: So it was Sven, Fatal Fury, The Giant Killer and Boom-Boom Obuhowich. CS: 5 on 4 for Trinity, I like those odds. But let's see what went down... ---------------------------------- (Sven Pieterson executes the Swedish Slam on Doug Bacon. Sven Pieterson goes for the pin. Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, thr... shoulder up.) Chip: I thought he had him! Fool: What an upset that would have been! (Sven Pieterson hits a Gorilla Press on Doug Bacon. Sven Pieterson takes Doug Bacon down with an inverted power bomb. Sven Pieterson is getting a good reaction from the crowd. Sven Pieterson is going for the pin. Ryan Wilson counts: One, two, Mortis makes the save. The crowd is cheering on Sven Pieterson.) Chip: Trinity is in real danger of losing this one. Fool: Who cares? As long as The Church doesn't lose. (Sven Pieterson goes for a punch, but Doug Bacon blocks it. Doug Bacon chops Sven Pieterson. Sven Pieterson kicks Doug Bacon. Sven Pieterson kicks Doug Bacon. The crowd is really behind Sven Pieterson. Sven Pieterson punches Doug Bacon. Sven Pieterson takes Doug Bacon down with a fallaway slam. Sven Pieterson hits a DDT on Doug Bacon.) -------------------------------- MJ: The match seamed to be going in team Sven's favor, until this happened... -------------------------------- (Doug Bacon takes Sven Pieterson down with an elbowsmash. Doug Bacon locks Sven Pieterson in a clawhold. Sven Pieterson reaches the ropes after being trapped for 8 seconds. Doug Bacon attempts to place Sven Pieterson on the turnbuckle, but Sven Pieterson blocks it. Sven Pieterson nails him with a low blow. The mysterious, skinny masked man in black is running back down the aisle.) Chip: He's back! What does this man want? (Sven Pieterson chops Doug Bacon. Sven Pieterson has the crowd going wild. Sven Pieterson chops Doug Bacon. Sven Pieterson has the crowd going wild. The masked man in black jumps up on the apron. He hits Kaos with the D-Dog-T. The crowd is going crazy.) Fool: D-Dog-T! He struck again! (Ryan Wilson disqualifies Team Sven. All the wrestlers on both teams hit the ring.) ----------------------------------- CS: The masked man hit again, and caused a disqualification on team Sven, so although Kaos got a D-Dog-T, Trinity still won. And I bet they were damn happy. MJ: No doubt about it, Cat. Although Trinity doesn't like to be blind sided, if they win, that's what they care about. CS: This sport is all about winning. Up next, what happened at ATW! Don't go away! -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Commercials for the CD "NoW 3," the SWF action figures and Slaughterhouse. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- MJ: Welcome back, folks. As you see, Dax has returned. DL: I hate you Cat. CS: And why is that? DL: You paid Perry, in lighting, to be the masked man. CS: What ever you want to think Dax. MJ: Well fans, this weeks ATW was nothing short of spectacular. Sean McKenzie took on Hot Shot Donovan, Kaos took and the Animal, Jack Frost took on The Vigilant and Titan took on team Madness. DL: T.w.O bastards. MJ: Without any further adue, lets go straight to Jack Frost and Vigilant. ----------------------------- The crowd is behind Jack Frost all the way. Jack Frost whips The Vigilante into the ropes. The Vigilante hits Jack Frost with a shoulderblock. The Vigilante goes for a choke slam, but Jack Frost blocks it. Jack Frost hits The Vigilante with a back heel kick. Jack Frost kicks The Vigilante. The crowd is behind Jack Frost all the way. Jack Frost chops The Vigilante. The chants for Jack Frost are deafening. Jack Frost goes for a slap, but The Vigilante blocks it. The Vigilante hits Jack Frost with a backdrop driver. James Beard counts: One, two, kickout. The Vigilante runs into the ropes. Ice pulls down the top rope. James Beard threatens Jack Frost with disqualification. Jack Frost goes through the ropes. SP: Ice trying to help her man out nearly causes frost the match. NS: Yep managers are like a double-edged sword. Sometimes they help you and sometimes they cost you. Ice comes from behind and distracts The Vigilante. Jack Frost takes The Vigilante down with a kneelift. James Beard counts: 1. Jack Frost goes for the Cold Shoulder, but The Vigilante counters it with a side step. The chants for The Vigilante are deafening. The Vigilante whips Jack Frost into the guardrail. James Beard counts: 2. They're brawling inside the ring area. Jack Frost executes a kneelift on The Vigilante. James Beard counts: 3. Jack Frost reenters the ring. SP: Jack realizes he is no match for the Vigilante on the outside, decides its safer in the ring. NS: Chicken..but at least he know his limits. The Vigilante follows him back in. The Vigilante uses a backdrop driver on Jack Frost. James Beard counts: One, two, thr... kickout. The Vigilante attempts to place Jack Frost on the turnbuckle, but Jack Frost blocks it. SP: Frost is climbing to the top rope and setting up for his finisher. Jack Frost executes the Cold Shoulder and goes for the pin. NS: Blam! A diving shoulderblock front eh top rope. The Vigilante is down for the count. James Beard counts: One, two, three. The crowd is going crazy. -------------------------------------- CS: Well that was defiantly a big win for Jack Frost. DL: Again, let me interrupt. But he fought the Vigilant! There is a 99% chance that he'd lose! MJ: Well, even though he _only_ beat Vigilant, I see a long and great career ahead for this man. CS: I'm not sure. He did beat Vig, but could he stay in the ring with someone like the Judge? DL: Like hell he can! MJ: I guess we'll have to wait and see. CS: After the Frost/Vig match up was the debut of another new comer here in the SWF: Titan. MJ: Titan will be taking on the team of Madness, so this is a handicap match. Look how it turned out. ---------------------------------------- Titan hits Madman with a slingshot. Titan is getting a good reaction from the crowd. Titan is going for the pin. Earl Hebner counts: One, two, kickout. Titan executes an elbowdrop on Madman. Titan locks Madman in an armlock hammerlock submission. Madman is valiantly trying to break the hold. Madman reaches the ropes after being trapped for 15 seconds. Titan whips Madman into the turnbuckle, but Madman reverses it. Madman nails Titan with a flying forearm. Earl Hebner counts: One, two, kickout. SP: A flying forearm by Madman sends Titan to the mat and almost ended the match. Madman hits Titan with a powerslam. Earl Hebner counts: One, two, shoulder up. Insanity enters the ring to make it two-on-one. Insanity nails Titan with a spinning DDT. Insanity is being booed like there is no tomorrow. Madman hits an elbowdrop from the second turnbuckle on Titan. Earl Hebner counts: One, two, kickout. Madman and Insanity hit Titan with a double DDT. Insanity leaves the ring. Madman executes a bulldog headlock on Titan. A wave of boos is going through the crowd. Madman hits a powerslam on Titan. Earl Hebner counts: One, two, kickout. Madman whips Titan into the ropes, but Titan reverses it. Titan gets a bearhug on Madman. SP: Titan has Madman in a bearhug and is squeezing the be-jesus out of him. NS: The WHAT? SP: The life out of him. NS: Why didn't you say that in the first place? Madman tries to escape the hold. Madman is inching his way towards the ropes. Madman is writhing in pain. Earl Hebner checks Madman's arm. He lifts it... it falls. SP: Madman's in trouble as Titan isn't letting go. He lifts it... it falls. NS: Now see that is what I like. A man that will stay with a winning hold. By the way that's two for Madman. He lifts it... it falls. SP: Earl Hebner checked it again and Madman cannot respond. Hebner is calling for the bell. Earl Hebner stops the match after 40 seconds. -------------------------------------------- DL: Yes, it's true, Madness... T.w.O's Madness has lost again. CS: Against one man too! I don't think them joining the T.w.O was a great career move. DL: It would be a good career move if you career was sky diving... CS: Skydiving? DL:.... without a parachute. CS: I get ya. MJ: Next is a match with Sean McKenzie and Hot Shot Donovan. Watch this match closely, it shows you how quickly a match can change. ---------------------------------------------- Danny Davis counts: 7. Hot Shot Donovan reenters the ring. Sean McKenzie follows him back in. Hot Shot Donovan whips Sean McKenzie into the ropes. Hot Shot Donovan goes for a palm blow, but Sean McKenzie blocks it. Sean McKenzie executes the Execution on Hot Shot Donovan. Sean McKenzie goes for the pin. Danny Davis counts: One, two, Trisha Deneke puts Hot Shot Donovan's foot on the rope. NS: Excuse me Davis, how about noticing something other then her breasts please. Sean McKenzie goes for an over-the-shoulder stomachbreaker, but Hot Shot Donovan counters it with an elbowsmash. SP: Good counter by Donovan. But McKenzie is just shaking it off. Hot Shot Donovan takes Sean McKenzie down with an enzuigiri. Hot Shot Donovan is going for the pin. Danny Davis counts: One, two, shoulder up. Hot Shot Donovan nails Sean McKenzie with a clothesline. Hot Shot Donovan hits Sean McKenzie with a clothesline. Hot Shot Donovan locks Sean McKenzie in a headscissors submission. Hot Shot Donovan lets go after 20 seconds. Hot Shot Donovan executes the Hot Kick on Sean McKenzie. The crowd is starting to get behind Hot Shot Donovan. Hot Shot Donovan goes for the pin. Danny Davis counts: One, two, Lady Jezebel distracts Danny Davis. NS: I've always thought Lady Jezebel to be very distracting. SP: Well she just saved McKenzie from a pin. Hot Shot Donovan executes an enzuigiri on Sean McKenzie. Hot Shot Donovan goes for a palm blow, but Sean McKenzie blocks it. Sean McKenzie punches Hot Shot Donovan. Sean McKenzie punches Hot Shot Donovan. Hot Shot Donovan punches Sean McKenzie. Hot Shot Donovan hits Sean McKenzie. A few fans are cheering on Hot Shot Donovan. Sean McKenzie kicks Hot Shot Donovan. Sean McKenzie is met with a "Sean McKenzie sucks" chant. SP: Oooooooooooo, though crowd. I don't believe I have ever heard anyone say anything bad about McKenzie. Sean McKenzie goes for a spinebuster slam, but Hot Shot Donovan counters it with a kneelift. In turn, Sean McKenzie counters it with an inside cradle. Sean McKenzie is going for the pin. Danny Davis counts: One, two, three. ----------------------------------------- CS: That quickly, and it's over. That just goes to show that the former International champ is still up there with the top SWF wrestlers. I think he'd be a good opponent for Mr. Shhh's world title. DL: Don't be ridiculous! MJ: I'd have to agree with Dax. Sean McKenzie is a great wrestler, but I doubt he could take his brother-in-law. DL: Get the match signed and we'll see! MJ: I'm afraid I can't do that. DL: Then what can you do? MJ: I can roll the clip from the Kaos/Animal match. DL: Then do it! -------------------------------- Kaos hits a backbreaker on Rock 'n Roll Animal. A small "Kaos" chant is being started. Kaos nails Rock 'n Roll Animal with a dropkick. Kaos is going for the pin. Earl Hebner counts: One, kickout. SP: Another near pin for Kaos. I have to tell you Shade I think Animal may be in trouble here. NS: Shut up Phoenix. Kaos hits an enzuigiri to the face on Rock 'n Roll Animal. Kaos takes Rock 'n Roll Animal down with a cartwheel kick. Kaos hits Rock 'n Roll Animal. Kaos kicks Rock 'n Roll Animal. The crowd is cheering on Kaos. SP: That crowd is really behind Kaos and I find that quite amusing. Everywhere else he is booed but the Greeks seem to like him. Must be the outfit. Kaos goes for a dragon suplex, but Rock 'n Roll Animal blocks it. Rock 'n Roll Animal takes Kaos down with a brain buster. The crowd is starting to get behind Rock 'n Roll Animal. Rock 'n Roll Animal hits a back heel kick on Kaos. Rock 'n Roll Animal hits a knee to the back on Kaos. Rock 'n Roll Animal hits Kaos with an atomic drop. NS: Excuse me I haven't heard a word come out of your mouth about those last few moves that Animal connected with. SP: Oh did he do something? I must have missed it. Rock 'n Roll Animal goes for a side suplex, but Kaos blocks it. Kaos uses a cartwheel kick on Rock 'n Roll Animal. Kaos uses a Frankensteiner on Rock 'n Roll Animal. Earl Hebner counts: One, two, kickout. SP: Oh look, [yawn] another almost pin by Kaos. NS: Don't make me hurt you Phoenix. Kaos uses a power bomb on Rock 'n Roll Animal. Earl Hebner counts: One, two, kickout. Kaos uses a flying clothesline on Rock 'n Roll Animal. Kaos nails Rock 'n Roll Animal with a dropkick. The crowd is cheering on Kaos. Kaos is going for the pin. Earl Hebner counts: One, two, kickout. SP: Animal just can't seem to get it together tonight. Kaos has dominated this match from the start. Kaos whips Rock 'n Roll Animal into the turnbuckle. Kaos charges into the corner. Kaos uses a bridging back suplex on Rock 'n Roll Animal. Earl Hebner counts: One, two, kickout. Kaos goes for a DDT, but Rock 'n Roll Animal blocks it. Rock 'n Roll Animal hits Kaos with a powerslam. NS: There is the Animal we all know and love. SP: I have to tell you that Kaos didn't expect that one and he looks pretty dazed. NS: Look at him he is climbing to the top rope. He is setting up for his finisher. The crowd is starting to get behind Rock 'n Roll Animal. Rock 'n Roll Animal executes the Revolution #9 on Kaos. NS: He did it.He nailed Kaos with his finisher and is going for the pin. SP: I can't believe this. Where did that come from. Kaos clearly out wrestled him tonight and with one move it is all over with. A small "Rock 'n Roll Animal" chant is being started. Rock 'n Roll Animal goes for the pin. Earl Hebner counts: One, two, three. --------------------------------------- MJ: Again, the experience of the Rock 'n Roll Animal won him this match. Kaos was all over Animal for the most part of the match, but the Animal still managed to execute the Revolution #9 to attain victory. DL: You're starting to sound more and more like the Judge. But you're right. I thought Animal was going to win this match before it started... and I was right. CS: That's a first. DL: Twice. You remember when I called the best picture category in this years Oscar's right. MJ: You called "As good as it gets," but Titanic won! DL: Not in my mind, sweetheart. MJ: Fans, we have to take a break. Up next is the rumor mill, so don't go away! ------------------------------------------------ Commercials for Ultra Downy, Tide and Armageddon. ------------------------------------------------ MJ: It is now time for my favorite part of the show... the Rumor Mill. DL: Boring... MJ: Will you stop interrupting me? Fans, this is the section of the show where I have accumulated rumors, speculations, what ever you chose to call them. So why don't I just start... The Underground is rumored to be making a return, starting with a new face to this organization. However, the identity of this person is still unknown. CS: The Underground? MJ: They were a stable is the SWF a while back, they were once very powerful. But all of their contracts ran out.... or they got fired. CS: Oh. DL: What does accumulated mean? MJ: Look it up! CS: So if the Underground make a return, what do you think will happen to the SWF? DL: Not much, they were pretty damn weak. MJ: Umm... I dunno. Dax never liked the Underground... Rumor has it that a former Rams teammate of Fatal Fury, who has made quite splash in pro wrestling himself, will be making a guest appearance on TT. You think he'd be helping Fatal Fury take out Trinity, and more specifically, Doug Bacon? DL: I don't think so. Maybe, he could get involved in a match, but we don't even know if he'll even show up... these are only rumors. MJ: Good point. Although, you think it could be Emmit Smith? DL: He's a cowboy. MJ: No, he's a Football player. [Cat Spencer laughs.] DL: Not funny. MJ: Okay, well, there is a current champion who might be trying to get out of his contract... and it isn't who you might think. DL: The Judge! MJ: That psycho? DL: Possibly... MJ: What do you think, Cat? CS: The Judge has just captured the International title. I don't think he'd be trying to get out of his contract. The guy is on fire, he'll go far here. On the other hand, the Thugz are a possibility because they have already tasted the gold. Maybe they're not happy with what's going on, and they want out. DL: But the Thugz are part of the Church. That's a pretty big reason to stay. CS: Maybe it's not enough. MJ: You both make good a good point. I guess we'll see. I've been told that Biggie-Z is going to be making a stable of his own due to the recent actions of the Church. And the members, well, they would be who you thought they'd be. DL: Tom Pho? S&F? CS: Dax might be on to something. S&F and Tom Pho both left Biggie high and dry. I doubt anyone would expect them to be the stablemates. MJ: But they're both in stables as it is. DL: That makes it a much bigger surprise, especially for the Revolution and the MIA. MJ: I guess. I've heard that the Sportin' Fool is acting as a spy for Trinity while being a member of the Church. What do you guys make of this one? DL: Well, he didn't really make a fuss about joining the Church. This could actually be true. MJ: Remember fans, you heard it here first! DL: And last depending where you live in the world. Such as Israel. I think this will be aired in three months there, and most of them will probably find everything out on the internet. MJ: What ever. In response to winning the International title, The Judge has seeked shelter with Mr. Shhh and the MiBs. It seems that the New Justice fears that he is now a marked man, and he could use all the protection. CS: Whoa. The Judge afraid? I would never had guessed! DL: Wait a minute, now. If the Judge joins the Church that would mean they get another belt! These boys know who to go after! MJ: Remember these are just rumors, who knows if this is true or not! DL: You make a good point. I guess the Church would REALLY get a freak like the Judge to join. MJ: Dax, you're interviewing the Judge next week. DL: What?! CS: Keep it going, Mikey. Dax will be unable to talk for a least 5 minutes. MJ: Well, the true identity of Kaos is rumored not the be Equalizer at all, but a member of the Underground! Trinity is keeping the identity of Kaos under wraps, but this story is still in development. CS: I still don't know who the Underground are, but this could be big, right? MJ: Well, yes. It could be one of many people. It could be former Toughman champion, Phoenix. It could be Mr. America. It could be Doug Bacon for all I know. CS: Isn't Doug Bacon part of Trinity already? MJ: He could be playing two people. CS: Unlikely. MJ: Recently, in a move that will shake the SWF to its core, reports of a large business deal going down are circulating through the front office. Details are that Mr. Roboto has paid the SWF a hefty amount of money to get a TV title shot at Hostile Takeover '98. CS: Mr. Roboto, getting a TV title shot? I don't believe a word your saying. MJ: Maybe you shouldn't... maybe you should. DL: I'm back. CS: He lives! DL: Shut up! I was in temporary shock... and I forget why. CS: I remember. MJ: Don't you dare! We need him. CS: Ok. MJ: Two more tid-bits before the last rumor of the day. DL: The horror! MJ: There is a new tag team coming to the SWF, and they're looking to make a big splash. DL: What's the other one? MJ: The O.n.E seems to be massing a counter strike, and might add someone to their roster. DL: Boring! MJ: Time for the final rumor of the day. Fans, you should look for some special guests to be at Hostile Takeover '98. The latest news is that some of Hollywood's biggest names will be at ringside for the event. DL: Arny! CS: You wish. MJ: I've heard it could be some Bruce Willis. DL: But Demi Moore won't be there. I would have liked to see her two friends. MJ: And which friends are these? DL: The ones that apparently add 20 pounds to her. MJ: I don't get it. CS: He means her chest area... MJ: Ohhhhh. You're bad, Dax! Really bad! CS: What are you talking about? MJ: It doesn't matter. I just want to tell all the people at home who are watching to stay tuned because the KBK are in the house when Cat Spencer welcomes them to the Litter Box. DL: Aw, crap. ------------------------------------------------------------------- Commercials for Sony Playstation, Lipton Brisk Iced tea and Kleenex. ------------------------------------------------------------------- MJ: Well, it's time for our first interview segment. Without any further adieu, let's go straight to the set of the Litter Box. DL: Tackiest damn thing I've ever seen. (Cut to the litter box set. There are photos of cats all around. The walls are painted blue, and the chairs are like cats. The legs are the legs of a cat, arms the arms of a cat, and the back, the stomach and head of a cat. There are three chairs lined up, and Cat Spencer is sitting in the one in the far back.) CS: Welcome to the Litter Box. The best interview show in the SWF. We'll be asking the questions that will show you who the wrestlers really are. Before we go to the interview, take a look at the history of the KBK... (Cat Spencer narrates.) [In his youth, Juan Vasquez(El Cholo) was a law-breaking terror. This Latino from Baja California was in and out of jail for such notable crimes as petty larceny, grand-theft auto, attempted murder, malicious violence, etc. [Cut to a picture of El Cholo as a youth.] [He was released upon his 18th birthday. Unemployed, and uneducated (he ended up getting his GED), he reformed, slightly, took up wrestling down in Mexico. [Cut to a picture of El Cholo in his wrestling gear in Mexico.] Now at the tender age of 20, he wrestles for the SWF, along with his partner Edwin Lopez(Chico). [Cut to a picture of the KBK.] [On the other hand, Edwin Lopez, grew up in East Los Angeles. He and his friend Vasquez terrorized the surrounding community. [Cut to a picture of the two of them when they were younger.] When Vasquez was arrested, Lopez decided to change his ways. (slightly) He studied hard, stayed in school, and found salvation in a miracle called a corona. Upon graduating from High School, he hooked up with Vasquez, and they formed the Kold Blooded Killaz. Despite looking their best for the parole officers, the Killaz still manage to break the law when they can.] CS: Without anymore waiting, I welcome you... the Kold Blooded Killaz! [Chico and El Cholo walk out in their street clothes. Cat gets up and shakes their hands, then gets started.] CS: Let's start with Cholo. What was it like growing up in the mean streets of Baja California.? Especially as a Latino. Cholo:" Well, foo', I only lived there for like a few years, and then we moved up to Cali. I do remember runnin' around the barrios naked and s*beep*, but when you a little kid, who the hell gonna tell you not to!?" [Cholo takes a swig of his corona, he wipes his mouth, and sits back.] CS: Did you have parental support when you were very young? [Cholo sits there for a moment, and thinks. He shakes his head, and drinks from the bottle again.] Cholo: "Well, my mom was there, but she was usually out all night and s*beep*. I didn't exactly have the best homelife, my dad ran off before I was born, and I was usually left alone. But it only made me the tough ass I is today. Do I wish I had parental support!? Sure, who doesn't!? But you can't change the past." CS: Why were you such a terror as a child? Cholo: "Well, when you ain't got no one around to smack you upside the head cause you be doin' things wrong, you tend to get a bit wild. S*beep*, little kids don't know what's up, if it's fun, you be doin' it. When I did somethin' wrong, did I care about the people I was hurtin'!? Noooo, course not, I was only thinkin' 'bout myself. That and the fact that no one was there for you. It tends to make a person a bit jaded. I'm not dysfunctional, I'm just bitter." CS: Is that why you are so rebellious in the ring? Cholo:"....Nahhhhh...I was always like that. It's fun to get paid fo' beatin' the s*beep* outta somebody. It's the only thing I know to do. You fight, you survive. Learned that s*beep* from Pho...." [Smiles] CS: What brought you into wrestling? Cholo: "Well, when I got outta prison, I needed work. I could've just went down to the freeway and sold f*beep*in' oranges, but what would be the point of that!? Sittin' out in the sun the whole day just to sell fruit. I laid around fo' a few days, gettin' drunk, and then, my savior..." CS: "Brian Frenck?" Cholo: "No puto, the gordita. On TV, I saw it. It was just speakin' to me, tellin' me to do things. It was singin'. Do you understand, it was singin'!!! Damn, I don't know, but the next thing I knew, I was here in the SWF." CS: It is noted that you were sent to jail for rather major crimes. Could you tell me what it was like in jail? How did the people treat you considering you were so young? At that age, going to jail with people so much older then you must have been tough. Cholo:" Well, I didn't drop my soap in the showers if that's what yer ass is tryin' to imply.(they laugh) I was sent to Juvenile Hall actually. I was bigger than most of them punkass taggers up in there, so they knew not to f*beep* with me. Spent most of my life up in there. It's lonely, no one to talk to, no friends, no family. S*beep*, it gave me time to think over my life. I didn't want to go through none of that s*beep* ever again. When I was released, I promised myself, I wasn't gonna get caught up in any of s*beep*. I had enough, and I had my whole damn life ahead of me. Well ain't that a bitch, I ran outta corona..." [Holds the bottle upside down to find that it is empty.] CS: Thank you Cholo, now Chico. You've known Cholo for a while haven't you? Chico: "Yeah, knew him since I was a little kid back in the day." CS: So you were pretty good friends, huh? Chico: "Yeah, he's my homie, known him all my life. He's like a f*beep*in' brother to me." CS: Is it true that you too, committed crimes? Chico: "Yeah, when you little, you don't exactly know the consequences of what you do. We were just clownin', we weren't gettin' caught or anything, so what reason would there be for us to stop!? Eventually, Cholo got caught up in some gang s*beep*, and that was the end of our fun." CS: So why didn't you go to jail along with you friend? Chico: "Well, you see, he took responsibility fo' my crimes too. As far as the court was concerned, I never saw Juan Vasquez in my life. It was kinda scary watchin' them take Cholo away. I'll always remember the look of helplessness that he had when they threw him in the car. I owed him. S*beep*, he sacrificed himself for me, so I knew not to f*beep* up anymore." CS: Since you didn't go to jail, you turned over a new leaf didn't you? You went to school, right? Chico: "Well, reality hit me right in the f*beep*in' face. Here I was, watchin' my life go right by me. What the hell was I doin' all this time!? F*beep*, the best chance I had was going back to school. Boring as hell, but I made it. Graduated last year." CS: After school was over, however, you reunited with your friend Cholo, didn't you? Chico: "It was kinda weird when we saw each other, it had been about 4 or 5 years. We stood there like a couple of putos smiling at each other for 15 minutes. I'll never forget the first thing he said to me..."You got any money!?"...well, I ain't gonna tell yo' ass the answer, but not long after that, we was wrestlin' here..." CS: Time for some tag team questions. When you guys came in for your interview, were you nervous? Chico: "No, not really, coronas make you kinda just sit there." Cholo: "Yeah, them media people be claiming harassment and s*beep*. Put a hand on them, and they be suing you fo' all yo' money. Good thing the gordita was here to show the way..." CS: How did it feel to win the tag titles? Chico: "It felt pretty damn good. Working our way up, climbing that ladder to the top, and when we were there, there wasn't anything to say, we just stood there basking in the glory, and soaking in the cheers." Cholo:" Well, for one thing, it didn't hold up my pants too well, and it was kinda heavy too..." Chico: "Ummm...foo', I think he meant how did you feel emotionally." Cholo: "Oh, that, all I had to do was thank my lord and savior, the gordita supreme for that moment." CS: What are your plans now? Cholo:" Well, I'm plannin' to go down to KFC and gettin' myself some hot wings. After that, who knows!?" [Chico and Cat stare at him for a minute. They shake their heads.] Chico: "Well, we'd like a shot at the titles again, but we just kickin' back and chillin'. The search for Tom Pho continues, and the MIA's always lookin' for people to join. Pho, if yer out there, we's gonna find you!!!! As for now, we're about to go to KFC." CS: Well, boys, I believe that is all. Thank you for coming. Cholo: "Boy!? Who you callin' a boy!? I outta fry and equalize yo' ass!!!!... [Chico restrains Cholo and covers up his mouth.] Chico: "Don't worry, it's his way of thanking you. It's been nice Cat, hope to do this again real soon." [Chico shakes Cat's hand, and pushes Cholo out of the door. Cat makes his way back to the announcers table.] MJ: That went very well, Cat. I can't wait to see Dax's though, he says it'll be magnificent. CS: I have my doubts. DL: You would! MJ: Fans, we're out of time. Remember that next week Dax will be interviewing the Judge, plus we'll have the latest news, rumors and results! For Dax Lemming and Cat Spencer, I'm Mike Janiack saying, good night! [Cat, Dax and Mike continue talking as the screen fades to black.]