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A Dictation
Due to the great consternation caused by the revelation of my act of
procreation, I accept my obligation to give an explanation to the
population for my act of copulation.
I gave in to temptation, for the anticipation of sexual
gratification, that I could not obtain through masturbation, which
resulted in my fornication. I accepted her invitation, and provided her
with excitation, stimulation, penetration, replication, and liberation.
She provided lubrication (to avoid inflammation) and I wore
condoms to avoid contamination. She cried for duplication but I insisted
upon termination, in spite of her fascination with variation.
This has caused me great aggravation, and the agitation and
provocation of the media has resulted in my humiliation, denigration,
and degradation. My wife is considering castration, which would require
my hospitalization.
Pray that this matter will find culmination in my
sanctification and rehabilitation so that my plans for nomination to my
ultimate vocation will not result in revocation and termination. I hope
this proclamation has provided illumination and verification and will
prohibit further provocation.
Sincerely,
The Reverend Jesse Jackson

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