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Andrew's Day Well, Greg and I went to my car in the cage to go home for Friday night at about 1:30. On the way over to his dorm I call my mom at work and I discover that she has gone to Seattle until Tuesday. So I go and get Greg and we go to the cage. When we get there we discover that the BMW is completely dead. We call Seth and he comes to help us jump it off. While waiting for Seth Greg makes continuous comments where he makes up different car parts by making up acronyms, and then adding "switch" to the end, declaring that the part has failed, and then saying the solution would be to put mouth balls in the gas tank to increase the octane efficiency and get an octane boost. Seth finally comes and we get out of there at about 2:05.
Chapter 2 We are now traveling down Route 8 about 30 minutes behind schedule. I am cruising along at about 65 mph, about ten over the posted limit, when Greg tells me that I might want to slow down because I don’t want to get a ticket. So I slow down to 55, and when we pass a sign changing the speed to 45, I slow down to that. However, since we are 30 minutes behind schedule we happen to pass through a school zone while school is letting out. I have never driven through that area during that time on a weekday, and neither had Greg. I was pulled over by a cop. I was going 41 in a 25 mph school zone, although I was 4 miles under the normal speed. After I am given a ticket for speeding, I ask the officer, “for the record, if I had a Get Out of Jail Free Card would you have let me go.” He says that they take these school zones pretty seriously, but that he didn’t give me a ticket for the expired inspection sticker, or the fact that we only buckled up after being stopped. I said thank you and that we would see him later, and then continued on our way to Martinsville. Chapter 3 So Greg and I get into town about 45 min. late, and I take him straight to the doctor, he is 5 min late for his appointment. I go home and find that there are keys to the Jaguar at my disposal. I immediately take the car out for a test drive. After about 20 min of riding around I drive to Cisco’s house and chat with him and Alicia until about 4:55. I then go put gas in the Jaguar and call Jessica. She says that Lauren just called her and that she is on her way over there. She says to call her back at 5:30. So I go home and dick around for half an hour, I then try to call her back. Between 5:30 and 6:30 she fails to answer her phone, as it rings indefinitely. By 6:30 I decide that Jessica has ditched me for dinner, and simply give up. I leave my house at 7 for the game. Since Jay is supposed to be in town I decide to ride by his house and see if he’s going to the game, so I turn down Mulberry.
Chapter 4 I wreck the Jaguar. If you want to see the car I wrecked go here Jaguar . It wasn’t my fault. This lady at the stop sign where the park is didn’t see me and tried to cross the street about 20 yards in front of me. I slam on the brakes and try to stop, but I hit her right on the passenger side door and she rolls into the creek with her wheels in the air. I turn off the car and go to see what happened to the other driver. A man gets out of his car and says that he has called 911. I see the car in the ditch and jump down into the water to see if the person is okay. I hear screaming, but can’t open the passenger side door. I tell the guy to come help me, but he doesn’t. I climb over the car to the other side and, through the 2 inches of glass above the water, see a foot. Again I tell the guy to help, but he just circles above. I try the driver’s side door and it opens the second time. The lady is yelling, and appears to be trapped by her seatbelt, and possibly her foot. Another man finally comes to help me, and gets in front of the door. I give him my knife and tell him to cut her loose. He does this, and we free her from the car. Chapter 5 The cops were pretty quick to show up, 3 cop cars, 2 fire trucks, about 10 EMS, 3 tow trucks, and 1 ambulance. I was not given a ticket for the accident, and neither was the woman. The officer ran the woman’s name through the computer and discovered that she had a suspended license for DRIVING WITHOUT INSURANCE. She had to go to the hospital because she said her back hurt, and was charged there. She was released from the hospital. I called Greg and Steeves, who were at the game, at about 8:45. They waited with me until the tow truck that took my car finally came. It took until about 9:30 for me to get back to my house. Greg picked me up at 10, and he, Steeves, Ben, and I went back and got the Mulberry/ Circle road sign that was in the creek, Greg waded through oil covered water to get it. The rest of the night was spent hanging out at the ridge and having Greg and Steeves share the story with everyone. The End  Hold on a second...a wreck that WASN'T Andrew's fault?!?! - John Colin Merchanct, Esq. So Andrew wrecked his parent's jaguar...go figure. - Andrew guessing John's response Insult deemed unprintable. - William Johnson Ward Do you have a caption for this article? If you do, CLICK HERE.
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