I went to a job interview during the summer of 1997, and was hired on the spot. I worked for the New Jersey Public Interest Research Group, NJPIRG for short, which is a citizen's lobby. My job title would be called "canvasser." What I actually did was to go door-to-door, promote ideas about serious issues of the environment, ask for memberships or any lesser contributions, and to campaign for the people. Not only did I get to brush up on my speaking and interpersonal skills, but I also learned much about politics and how the democratic process works. I was completely amazed by how far the organization could stretch a dollar. I saw with my own eyes how every dollar helps. It was an excellent experience, for a myriad of reasons. I had the opportunity to meet New Jersey's Governor, Christine Todd Whitman, in which three fellow co-workers and I were able to shake her hand and ask her questions about the issues. Even though it was a very demanding job, in which I had to work more than 40 hours a week, I would never have given up the experience. I became so involved with the campaign that I became a member of the organization and also dedicated my web page toward the campaign.

I had to eventually quit the job because Girls' Tennis season tryouts were beginning. I was the co-captain the previous year, and I had an excellent chance for this year to be it again. I was doing exceedingly well during the first few days, and I honestly felt that I would become second singles. However, something had happened. Through a self-examination, I found a large mass in my right breast. Immediately, I became concerned, and telling my mom was the first of many hard things that I had to do. My mom had a hard time believing what had happened. We went to my mom's gynecologist, who then recommended a breast specialist. Unfortunately, the breast specialist then found a much smaller mass in my left breast as well which frightened me quite a bit. Next, I had an ultrasound, to find out exactly was the masses were made of. It was determined that the masses were solid (instead of the hoped for liquid, in which surgery wouldn�t have been necessary), so surgery became inevitable. It had to be daytime surgery because the surgical procedure would have taken about an hour. Before the day of my surgery, I was given a pamphlet of instructions staying in pediatrics center. In it, it said to "bring your child's favorite stuffed animal, blanket, etc." So, I brought along a stuffed animal. To be honest, the stay at the hospital was the most comforting part. Upon entering the hospital, everything seemed better than I had dreaded; the decor of the pediatrics center was great and the nurses were great and made it easy going. Of course, the existence of cable television and video games didn�t hurt. Once I was wheeled into the operating room, I thought that I would be very nervous, but I wasn�t. It was an easy process, and before I was put under the anesthetic, I was joking around with the surgeon and the assistants about the music on the radio and my doll. Afterwards, I found out that the mass wasn't malignant, but benign, which I am very grateful for.

Recovery was the hardest part of the entire ordeal. I wasn't able to do anything physical for 4-6 weeks. I was also told that after the recovery period, I would be out of physical condition. I couldn't shower for a while, but the worst part was that I had trouble doing simple things, such as standing up, and raising my arms. I could only sleep in certain positions, and slept a great deal. The hardest thing to deal with was that there was no way I could rejoin tennis. I wanted to contribute to the team in some form, so I asked if I could become the team's manager. The coach agreed, and it was great to be a part of the team, although I was unable to contribute the way I wanted to. Of course it hurt me to watch because it wasn�t me on the court, but this was the most that I could do. After 4 weeks, I did begin playing, but it was more than halfway into the season, and it was too late for me to be a starter, but I worked my way up from being totally out-of-shape to first alternate, and I would fill-in for anyone who was absent.

Many of my friends were there to support me, although some deserted me. I discovered who my real friends were, and it didn't bother them to see me in a mess.

Ironically, I read Lightning by Danielle Steele, earlier in the summer, which was about successful woman in both her having a happy family and profession. It was then discovered that she had a malignant form of breast cancer, and her life became a nightmare because of it. Many times I feared that my fate would be similar. I dreaded chemotherapy the most. I was worried, not the baldness in particular, but whether I would become infertile. I did much of my own research, although I dreaded what every study had found. At first, I wanted to keep my problem secret, but now that everything is fine, it doesn't bother me that several people know. It feels like a form of community service. I defy those that say "It won't happen to me," because I am proof that it can and may.

Before this summer, I was living on a day-to-day basis, but this summer, it was the first time in my life that I truly feared for my life. It is a characteristic of my age that one feels like one is immortal, but now, I know differently. Only recently have I begun to push myself more, and be happier of simple things, such as life.